[peeks out from under the covers] Has it started yet? No? Who said I was scared? I’m not scared. Maybe it’s YOU that’s scared. [sighs]
Wash @ NYG: The Giants should be 2-0. Let’s get that out of the way right now. Howevah, The Catastrophic Meltdowns really like the vibe that this team is giving off. As far as Washington is concerned, if this Matt Jones kid is the real thing and Morris keeps going they’ve got a running game that may take them to the NFC East title. Not that that will be a great accomplishment this year. Ain’t sour grapes grand? Cousins’ play is up and down and he doesn’t have D-Jax but the Giants don’t have Rogers-Cromartie so that should be a wash. Beason is ready to give it a go tonight-maybe he’ll make it through the whole game. You just never know, maybe the Giants finally get their *Coughlin* shit *Coughlin* together. We could be looking at another snooze-fest but, “It’s Still Real To Me, Damnit!” What can I say, the scotch is poured. (into an Oktoberfest-sized stein)
Giant-esque delay of game penalty.
Like my grandfather, Cousins can’t stop shitting the bed.
Your early NOPE
Um…oops…
I didn’t mean to post the photo. I really wish I had an edit button ight now.
DTZM, this was an accident. I meant to post a link to the picture.
I’m really sorry.
Yes, oops. Sill that is totally what I wanted to say. It wasn’t intentional like some people posting tentacle porn.
As my apology, the first non- porno on screen orgasm, SFW
http://static.messynessychic.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/hedylamarorgasm.png
I could go for an Underberg right now, but I’m clean out. WHERE MY DIGESTIF AT?
This game sucks for some reason. I can’t put a finger on it.
Is that you, JPP?
Thumbs-up!
You know. I’m starting to get the impression that Cousins isn’t a good quarterback.
I CAN THIS GAME….um…something….shit…I’m not good at this….HEY JUST LIKE COUSINS!
Jesus, stop throwing flags, i want this game to be over by one
http://i.space.com/images/i/000/023/673/wS3/vista-look-at-helix-nebula-1600.jpg?1352931499
Flags for the Flag God!
I call him “Flagon”, and from His cup I drink.
“Don’t take a sake!”
Oh don’t worry, they won’t.
*gets firstdown*
Sack
DraftDuel/FanKings is the reality TV of fantasy football. It’s never going to go away.
I might not take that bet
http://germancarsforsaleblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/DSC_0526-1024×680.jpg
Underrated car
Most.
This is where I’m focusing now:
http://ntropy2012.tumblr.com/image/129821137305
because I can’t handle seeing any more goddamn yellow flags. This game, I call it The Black Hole because it is a giant disc of suck from which nothing, not even entertainment, can escape.
http://i.qkme.me/3qe7ur.jpg
John Fucking Zoidberg!
http://images.popmatters.com/blog_art/s/safeinhell1.jpg
For all of you Pre-Code fans.
Safe in Hell
Count the violations…
Honestly blitzing Cousins is a pretty sound strategy, but not as sound as it would be if the Giants played coverage behind it.
Amukamara’s out at the moment, but probable to return (sex with wife)
Kirk Cousins is a black hole from which no form of entertainment can escape, not even schadenfreude.
Nah, schadenfreude is like Jell-O … there’s always room!
MOAR FRAGS
Has there been one play without a flag tonight?
Yes, the coin toss.
http://www.polmanminerals.com/assets/images/Tucson_Fluorescent_Mineral_Display_2012.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/Zt1ovR9.jpg
Jesus, Marie!
http://www.thegeekocracy.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/breaking-bad-marie-schrader.gif
!
I listened to the end of the third quarter on the radio during the drive home. It sounds like lebanese food instead of football was the right choice. Hummus > Cousins
You willingly expose yourself to Larry Michael? You deserve some sort of a medal.
I’m pretty good at tuning out anything that isn’t play by play.
At least he held onto his helmet.
Seriously thought 20 was running on the sideline to take a shit during the game…
You mean they don’t just go on the field? Because i’m pretty sure i saw the Giants do it two weeks in a row..
THIS GAME, I CALL IT INCEST, BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU START FUCKING COUSINS
Fucking put in RGIII already. The game is over. Get some tape of RGIII for trade bait. Do fucking something.
Shit I hate the skins but this is just sad.
No, I don’t need to speak.
http://www.doctormacro.com/Images/Bow,%20Clara/Annex/Annex%20-%20Bow,%20Clara_14.jpg
Black and white means it’s CLASSY!
http://i.imgur.com/2wWTtse.gif
#meshtastic
This might surprise some people, but Kirk Cousins is not very good
But COOCH, he’s SO WHITE!!!!
Cousins looks like Bradley Cooper’s character from Limitless before he started being limitless.
Kirk Cousins is…. EXTREMELY LIMITED!!
“Every quarterback has games like this.”
His just happen to always occur in nationally televised games against divisional opponents.
I fucking detest people who fucking come to a social event and play om their phone nonstop. Thanks draftkings for another reason to hate you.
Posted from said event?
Sorry…i flip the channel with my ass to a draft kings commercial and just thought they went to commercial break. It was not till Gilligan’s Island came on that I realized I flipped channels.
http://i.imgur.com/3K7BuFC.jpg
You can have ONE, Eli!
I go bed now knowing that the G-men have won and in case The Meltdowns happen again I don’t see it.
She is married to Mel Brooks.
I guess this offes hope hope to all of us commentists, at least if we are funny enough.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GD7iQYsjBgQ/UshQo6X6JYI/AAAAAAAAYkY/j_XPx8dY0ls/s1600/RobinsonBH.jpg
Max Brooks’ mom?
Shiiiiiiit, I’m not even funny enough to beat Martin Lawrence, let alone Mel Motherfuckin Brooks.
Goddamn, they really like to tack on the commercials for these Thursday games, huh?
Yup.
To me, this is art:
Goodness gracious.
I don’t care if she doesn’t have a soul, she can have mine…..and m’dick..
There’s Gregg Easterbrook, and I think …. yes, he may be… he is…. reaching for HIS NOTEBOOK!
GODFREY DANIEL!
STREWTH
Timely Duck Boat commercial!
Oh shit, really?
Was just talking about that American Express commercial that mentioned Duck Boats real quickly. “Hello,Duck Boat!”
I was so focused on how irritating I find that woman that I didn’t notice the duck boat part.
Didn’t run on Seattles feed for some reason.
ah man, that just makes me miss Car Boat!
It took 3 quarters, but something entertaining happened.
http://media.giphy.com/media/RQBw6Ov4wQlgI/giphy.gif
Thanks, I never wanted to get an erection again, anyway.
Eh, what good were they doing me, escorts are really expensive anyway ,, ppl forget that.
They need to have Beckham teach the other receivers how to catch.
Oh WOW
http://cdn.rsvlts.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/Leanna-Decker-GIF-040.gif
Eli’s really earned his post-game snowcone.
Archie, it thought it was going to be a Mott’s and then straight to bed!
Odell Beckham vs secondary:
http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/dragonball/images/1/12/GokuPiccoloBroly.gif/revision/latest?cb=20101010180150
truly insurmountable, amen, hallelujah
Goddamn, do i love that boy……no homo
Odell Beckham, Jr.. He catches the footballs.
SNAGALICIOUS!!!!
Odell Beckham, Jr. = good at the footed ball sport
And game
I think the best possible ending to the game…
Eli pick six. Skins come back to tie it. Goes to overtime and the giants win the toss. Eli leads them down to inside the 10. A series of penalties and missteps lead to a long field goal. Kick off to the Skins. First play, Cousins gets hurt. RGIII comes and leads them to field goal range. Score tied again. No one scores again.
The [*Redacted] s would forfeit before they give RGIII the ball again.