Your “Coke Is Poison!” Sunday Night Thread

NE @ Ind: [swallows bile and pride] I have to give the guy credit for saying what everyone knows and what never gets said in major media. There. I feel faint but I think I’m okay. What no one addressed is that Brady added, “Donuts are the Anti-Christ!” so the Pats may want to re-evaluate their concussion protocols. Look, the Pats are rested, this is a “revenge” game and Belichick has had two weeks to prepare. This will not go well for the Colts. Don’t get me wrong-I’ll be cheering for the home team but their D is porous and QB-wise this is a no-brainer. Prove me wrong, Luck.

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Sill Bimmons

Remembering Andre Johnson: How I Could Have Put My Team In A Better Position To Win by Chuck Pagano.

evilbeaver8

It would actually be a bit of a moral victory for Luck to lead a TD drive and only lose by 6…at least everyone would remember the loss for the stupidest fucking special teams play call in the history of the sport.

Dick E. Phuck

That Belichick! He can do no wrong.

Romonobyl

Until he gets caught.

CBQUE

Uh check his record in Cleveland. Oh I forgot he didn’t have the legendary Boston faithful rooting him on.

Dick E. Phuck

You guys realize I’m being sarcastic, right?

Dunstan

Simmons’ Law: Genuine Pats fan douchebaggery is indistinguishable from trolling or sarcasm.

Dick E. Phuck

But….I’m not a Pats fan. Far from it, actually.

Dunstan

Yes, I know. The point being that your sarcasm is easily mistaken for something someone might actually say with sincerity.
And I could be wrong, but I doubt most of us here really remember who’s a fan of which team.

Dick E. Phuck

Oh, alright then. I get the point.

Romonobyl
CBQUE

Okay y’all. train ride left me sleepy. Good night and god bless. FUCK YOU UPROXX!!!!!!!!!!

John Difool

Marilyn Manson finally went and got himself some real tits?

indieguy

she’s more my type

King Hippo

We’re all just staying up to see if they cover.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’d take a pick 6 to end it.

CBQUE

As bizarre as this may sound The Colts D has played pretty well. Again Andrew enough is enough.

Sill Bimmons

oh if only hed broken everything

Brick Meathook

He could have EXPLODED Brady

entropy

Mutant League Football really needs to come back.

King Hippo

YES!

Dick E. Phuck

ROUGHING THE PASSER!!! FLAGS!!!! FLAGS!!!

CBQUE

I honestly was expecting a flag.

WCS

(giggle)

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Should’ve gone low.

King Hippo

oh my…

entropy

Well, hello there!

John Difool
Dick E. Phuck

You think Luck is upset now? Just wait until he comes home and finds John Book staying in his house.

CBQUE

I love reading stories where The Colts are lukewarm on signing Luck to an extension. If I was Luck I’d say “Why the fuck should I stay here when you’ve got this shitty ass O-line in front of me.?”

Old School Zero

Assassin’s Creed: Dickens

Brick Meathook

STELLAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

http://i.imgur.com/4kTbkpM.jpg

entropy

Why is Samsung acting like a stylus is the greatest invention of all time? The fucking Treo had a stylus and it was a piece of shit.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Who took my palm pilot? GET OFF MY LAWN

Dunstan

Because think of all the new ways this gives 15-year-olds to say “I love you”!

Sill Bimmons

It annoys me that the Clots will host a playoff game.

King Hippo

yeah, but imagine how badly the Jets will beat them

evilbeaver8

If Pep Hamilton still has a job tomorrow….my God….

CBQUE

I’ve seen the photos he has. Pretty bad.

CBQUE

Hi we’re The Colts, we’ve been fortunate to draft two franchise caliber QB’s 15 years apart. We’ve decided to do all we can to not protect the second one. We think putting cardboard cutouts at the O-line spots is acceptable.

King Hippo

Bill Barnwell did an analysis a few weeks back, since the Luck pick the Colts have spent the 2nd-least in draft assets on OL in the entire NFL

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
entropy

3rd and 7 screen pass?

King Hippo

The Colts really are ass, aren’t they?

litre_cola

O Line is just horrible.

John Difool

The refs had him dead to Reitz

Dick E. Phuck

Coby Fleener. Did you know he went to Stanford and played basketball?
Wait, he didn’t play basketball. No wonder he fucking sucks.

King Hippo

jusssssst a bit of a hold there

CBQUE

Hey Andre Johnson he’s good lets throw to him. Fucking morons.

Brick Meathook

STELLAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!

http://i.imgur.com/eBh2v4w.jpg

laserguru

Oh shit!
Here come’s Omar!

makeitsnowondem

But did you know that playing cards with Kenny G gets old pretty fast?

[elevator music]

Romonobyl

Reminds me of my dentist’s waiting room.

Sill Bimmons

Did you know that playing cards with Kenny McCormick often results in being covered in blood and skull fragments?

http://1.images.southparkstudios.com/blogs/southparkstudios.com/files/2014/09/101_KennyDeath_4.gif

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ok, with the Cubs done making me suffer, I can put my full attention to the Colts fucking up my cover bet.

Brick Meathook

THIS FUCKIN KENNY ROGERS COMMERCIAL GOT OLD EVEN FASTER

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
evilbeaver8

Colts drive: 3 straight 7 step drops with no safety valve out of the backfield, 2 incompletions, one sack, punt from own 5.

Dick E. Phuck

I feel bad for the poor soul who has to clean up the MNF broadcast booth after the game. Can you imagine the mess Collinsworth must leave in there?

Dick E. Phuck

I mean SNF

CBQUE

The MFN booth may be just as bad with all the fluids that Gruden spits out in three plus hours. Add in Tirico and hell you may need a Hazmat suit

bourb0nblues
laserguru

I tell ya!
That’s a couple of tough yords!

Sill Bimmons

oh hai Lily

comment image

entropy

I would chain her in my basement.

CBQUE

Think she does Anal?

Sill Bimmons

She’s from Uzbekistan.

entropy

She will.

entropy

Dirt Jets lead series 2-0.

CBQUE

If they make it to The WS I may have to go on a killing spree. Their fans are too fucking obnoxious & cocky for being a pimple on the ass of society for close to a decade.

King Hippo

I would say that about the rioting Small Bear fans. Commentists not included.

CBQUE

Difference is there were people actually alive the last time The Mets won a World Series. Whenever I hear them or the NY media say “long suffering” I want to vomit.

entropy

I can kind of see where you’re coming from with it, but I live in Phillies territory, where unless they are in or a game out of first place, the fans disappear. But when they’re winning? Fuck you’d think these assholes were there for the very first pitch in team history. At least Mets fans are fairly consistent.

King Hippo

GOD BLESS THE DIRT JETS. I may be able to put off Seppuku another few months, at least.

blaxabbath

Look at Tom Brady move! He’s like an aging A-Rod!

Such fantastic natural specimens!

King Hippo

I approve this message

laserguru

totally safe

entropy

I dunno, seems like dangerous curves.

King Hippo

Dem ringolets

laserguru

Goddamn I love red heads.

Sill Bimmons

That’s one of the Seven Sisters Of Stalin in the background.

laserguru

There we go. A nice shot of Bulleit 10 year old.
Holy crap.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Cubs down to their last out.

CBQUE

Fuck Andrew Luck. I mean seriously at some point he has to show some balls and take some chances. As for Poop Hamilton get this clown a fucking brain. If i were interviewing him first thing I’d ask is why the fuck do your game plans make no sense.

blaxabbath

I wish Borat were around to interview him.