I read something on ESPN today that really pissed me off. I’m not the sort to call out pro athletes but this really got to me. Apparently Keenan Allen has some sort of unspecified kidney injury that is going to keep him out indefinitely. Really? “A” kidney injury? Do you see where I’m going with this? Christ, he’s got more than one. Was this not explained to him by the team doctors? It’s not like he’s got some problem with his heart. Wait. Actually, metaphorically he does have an issue with that organ as well. As an every-day nobody that punishes my liver day-in and day-out without regard to the long-term consequences I think Allen is taking the easy way out. You can rest assured that he’ll never play on one of my fantasy teams ever again!
Ind @ Car: The rumour going round is that Luck has cracked ribs but it went unreported because he had a shoulder ouchie at the same time. Why Pats fans aren’t piling onto this news befuddles me. Maybe someone jangled a set of keys nearby? I’ve seen it happen before. With a loss, which would give them a 4-4 record, the Colts would maintain their stranglehold on the first place position in the AFC South. Someone’s getting a season-ending injury tonight. My money is on TE Olsen. Why? Why not? You’re asking for a rationale? These things happen for a not-reason. Guh! The Panthers are off to their best start in franchise history at 6-0. Asked to comment, owner Richardson maintained that his favourite start was 3 and 5. He’s such a silly goose!
Ha ha ha I am playing against the Panther D, they need 8, they will get it. Should have gambled on it, I would be a rich man gambling against myself.
Not a precocious pass, there, Cam.
I’m glad I needed 60 points out of Andrew Luck to win my fantasy matchup; I knew I was never going to get it so I can just sit back and laugh about this.
http://i.imgur.com/0GNE7AE.gif
Gonna be fun to watch if this continues throughout the game. We may be watching Luck turn into Jake Delhomme before our very eyes.
We’ve replaced Andrew Luck with Ryan Leaf.
Let’s see if anybody notices.
too far
SHIT, where did my pill stash go??
Wow this got ugly fast
So I take it you’re in Indianapolis for work?
Oh. Oh DAMN, Clots. That was ungood.
HODORCEPTION!
Peanut raidin’ the barn
Peanutception!
Wow. I love this game already. Yay Peanut!
Knicks need to traded Melo.
Don’t know how old you are but Melo has scored as many meaningless points as Alex English. Perhaps more.
Tirico has the wrong QB; Eli’s the one who’s always asking for juice on the sidelines.
Haven’t you seen the news, it’s Tom Brady that’s got a juice problem.
http://upshout.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/strange-wedding-dresses-preview.jpg
Book em Gano
http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1162/1199240859_bfa3b8912c_o.jpg
So the takeaway from the first quarter here is that no one can handle wet balls at this game.
I really can’t wait for Gruden to say that and not realize it.
Are we going to have live polls? We had them in the old old live blog when someone had to approve all comments. I liked them.
I don’t know about embedding them, but you can make and link your own.
https://www.easypolls.net/
http://strawpoll.me/5906687
Q: What’s the difference between a downpour and a pourdown?
A: One is a word that can be used to describe the current weather conditions, the other is a word that can be used to describe an I K Enemkpali touchdown.
The gravy will flow in Fathumpvile tonight.
http://img.csdecisions.com/4682.jpg
“…because tonight, is just like any other night…”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bAJ_74tDZzU
NOT EVEN A MINUTE COLTS! NOT EVEN A FUCKING MINUTE!!!!
http://24.media.tumblr.com/179fde8833681804a7879f1741127432/tumblr_mjguce6u4R1ro8ysbo1_400.gif
I turn it on and that happens.
Welp.
Heh, wet ball snaps
hey guys
Yo.
Hey
sup
wet balls heee
yo
i know right heee
http://cdn0.sbnation.com/assets/3808909/sohappy.gif
I’m a few hours NE, but the weather in my fair state has been consistently shitty for 24 hours straight. No question.
STEADY DOWNPOUR BOWL
I simply assumed those were tears from all the fat humps looking at a losing season.
I was gonna make a “barely raining” joke but we just got the fumble
one more reason hockey is objectively superior to other sports: once the anthem is over and the carpet is rolled up, you’ve got maybe 10 seconds before the game starts, not 10 commercials.
It would be more fun if they didn’t let the singer use a carpet.
That’s because they can’t sell that much ad time. Not enough buyers.
No offence, but I wish they would get a Real American to sing the anthem.
That’s the next idea the [*Redacted] s PR department has come up with
Yeah, considering their “white out the stadium” plan failed miserably when everyone showed up in klansmen garb.
You spelled “offense” like a non-American
INSTRAMENTA- AH FUCK IT!
Is Kawhi Leonard elite?
Wow, her 15 minutes aren’t up yet?
Come on, this isn’t THAT long a rendition of the anthem….
THIS MNF PREGAME SHOW I CALL IT FOREPLAY – IT LASTS TOO LONG, ISN’T VERY INTERESTING, AND IT’S SOMETHING I DON’T NEED
I think Gruden should shut the fuck up about anyone else ruining a football game.
Vernon Davis, newest Horsey!
Evening. Go Spurs Go!
So I guess beating the SeaTruthers signaled bandwagon jumping time for the commentators.
Not to be That Guy, but wouldn’t a loss drop the Colts to 3-5?
The lesson here is never trust me.
Was not the FIrefly gif I looked for, can’t say I am sad
http://media.giphy.com/media/O9a3gGrQUssvK/giphy.gif
I give you Sam Roberts’ “Where Have All The Good People Gone?” Answer?-DFO
https://youtu.be/2Ni8oFtgoAI
I’m hoping Allen’s “unspecified injury” is that some hooker he met on Craigslist drugged him and stole his kidney, leaving him in an ice bath in a seedy motel with a message in lipstick on the mirror.
“Yeah, but the truth would never come out. He’d say it was a fireworks accident, or something.”
– Jason Pierre-Paul
Wasn’t there a pitcher who once said he couldn’t play because he chipped a tooth biting into a cupcake? I think we all know THAT’s code for something….
I was assuming untreated UTI, but yours is better.
All the articles got it wrong, he’s not “out with a kidney,” he’s “without a kidney.”
Every ESPN panelist picked the Panthers. Ruh roh.
Bourdain’s Kitchen Confidential is now a series starring Bradley Cooper?
Uh…I mean, it was, like ten years ago.
Are you telling me that my Canuck cooking channel is offering me ten year-old leftovers?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_LJtG2gXSc
Rick and Morty is the best.
Possibly repeat? It is a Summer Glau pic, it is a repeat
http://img11.hostingpics.net/pics/7226091273012639463.gif
I’m thankful there isn’t any more baseball.
When the Boob Jays were rolling I tried my very best to watch 4 whole innings in a row. No go.
To be honest, so am I. The Mets were only prolonging the inevitable and I like my sports disappointment like my women, short and fast. Now I get to watch the Jets implode and then settle in for a nice long winter of not giving a fuck about the NBA and marginally following hockey until the playoffs.
My favorite picture from last night, as Hosmer scores to tie the game in the ninth.
Oh, those faces…
http://i.imgur.com/w16sTHL.jpg
Is the guy in maroon trying to take a picture with his lanyarded ticket?
And longsleeve-shirt-tucked-into-jeans is looking at least 20 degrees to far to his right.
This is so beautiful. I want to make it into my Christmas card.
I went from breaking down over my puppy to stuck in a 3 hour convo with my dad where I was expected to remember stuff from every physics class I have taken. I remember nothing from those classes went off the stuff I went and learned after something was mentioned on a TV show. I am ready for some football.
Enough puppy talk, Marc. Geez!
I’m itching for some action! Hoping the Panthers destroy the Indys.
GAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Apparently this is a sport in Finland…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-GT-UHnh8TI&feature=youtu.be&t=1m27s
I cannot believe I worked for these people for a year in the Middle East…
You know what else is apparently a sport in Finland? Not telling people how old you are before you make out with them, even though it’s going to make them incredibly uncomfortable later when they find out.
Apparently NFL weekdays are now DIY time with Doktor Zymm. I just replaced a wall switch from an incandescent-only dimmer to a regular flip switch, which I promptly covered up when I put in my programmable LEDs. Now all my lights are talking to each other (firmware update) and it’s kinda creepy. I still have two more switches to do, but I’m done running up and down the stairs to the circuit breakers for the evening. I got my proof of concept done, I can do the vestibule light and the dining room tomorrow. On the plus side, when I wake up stupidly early tomorrow, I will do it to a scheduled artificial sunrise in theme “Atlantis!”
Circuit breaker! Ha!
Nothing beats home DIY with live wires.
I was gonna replace my kitchen sink fixture but couldn’t find my faucet wrench so I poured some Ri’ instead. I think I made a wise decision.
http://accordmine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/Faucet-Wrench-4.jpg
So…what you’re saying is that I should pour myself some scotch? Can do. Hm, I wonder what costs more, my nice scotch, or hiring an electrician to replace a wall switch?
The electrician, in both monetary and psychological damage assessments.
Sounds like you have the electrical stuff under control. Use the money saved by not paying an electrician to buy MOAR SCOTCH!