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Per Yahoo Sports, the 49ers are electing to #GoWithTheFlow!
Guess that’s what happens when the #7tormsover. So how long until Chip brings him to PHI?
Flow Time! – It’s Your Trade Deadline Activity Thread
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Off topic but interesting: Jon Stewart is going to HBO.
Yea so I’m going to Yoga today by myself because I’m getting out of shape and I have no desire to run anywhere unless it’s in a sport setting and because I feel like maybe I can pick up a chick?
Best move in group class stuff is just to be near your target afterwards(water fountain or whatever) and act impressed by her effort. “I saw you pulled off that headstand. That’s impressive, I could barely get tilted up.” I don’t have good social skills AT ALL and this works for me. Just don’t be too self-deprecating; it’s about her doing well, not you doing poorly.
But beware – you may be all gross from the class.
Go up to a woman and say, “Wow, those are some great leg warmers!”
She’ll say, “But I’m not wearing leg warmers.”
Then you say, “Sorry, I was thinking of what you’ll say when you open them on Christmas!”
Whatever you do, make sure you don’t eat anything that can give you gas. Because yoga will make the gas come out. A lot.
Joseph Randle released by the Cowboobs!
/mmm, cowboobs
“According to sources, he is also facing a suspension for violating the NFL’s personal conduct policy for an incident last February in Wichita, Kansas.”
Who are these assholes that manage to get in trouble in fucking Wichita?!
….I’m going to Wichita next month
A neutral infraction?
“Sunday Gravy with yeah right: Lacerated kidney with red wine reduction!”
Jesus Christ that sounds like a horrible injury.
And there goes my best fantasy receiver.
“THE FIRE TRUCK GOES WHOO! WHOO!”
-Eli, responding when asked what the Giants might do on trade day
Also applicable for when Olivia asked Eli for a recap of what happened at Jason Pierre-Paul’s 4th-of-July party.
If the Chargers don’t start wheeling and dealing like mad today, then Telesco is either a.) dumb as a toast phone, or b.) so neutered by Spanos that he can’t even really be a true GM until they’re in L.A.
Toast you say? YEAH TOAST
Pierre Thomas to the 49ers
7ucky Pie77e!
I couldn’t run to my fantasy site fast enough up hearing this news!
King’s hair is so dark in this. How fucking long ago was Hall in the NFL?
The beauty about daily fantasy is not dealing with the waiver wire because there’s no long term commitment! It’s also why I live with my mom, because she doesn’t make me sign a lease!
Does she make you use promo code TAKEOUTTHETRASH?
I missed a lot of the rivebrogs, so maybe this got covered, but the Washington Post has a piece on the story behind that batshit twitter story: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-intersect/wp/2015/11/02/the-true-story-behind-zola-the-epic-twitter-story-too-crazy-to-be-real/
Wes Welker as a Raven. Oh boy would that stir the shit around here.
Kaep to the Jetskis? Let’s keep this 49ers dissembling rolling!
I don’t even know how I’d feel about this.
I have just the thing for Kaep:
Dark and 7tormy!
2 oz dark rum
5 oz ginger beer
1 da7h of bitter7 (or bitter tear7)
Lime wedge.
7tart drinking immediately. Repeat until unconciou7.
“7tart drinking immediately. Repeat until unconciou7.”
Or signed by the Raiders after your release.
Ken Whisenhunt = FIRED
Amazing how Mariotta couldn’t take over the offense the way Warner did with a young Boldin and Fitzgerald on the outside.
Nobody wants the Wiz.
Nobody Beats the Wiz, well everyone does, but I wanted to post this commercial.
“Wait, you’re firing me? Who are you going to bring. Bullshit, I say!”
“No, Ken, it’s Mularkey.”
If I wanted to spend all day talking about the flow, then I wouldn’t have gotten myself fired from that job at Kotex.
And if Tennessee had a team, they would be firing their head coach today.
Poor Whisenhunt.
Then again, what the fuck are you thinking taking an HC gig with TEN?
Still safer than the QB job. I hear that’s one bitch that’ll shoot in the foot, the chest, the head…
Prophetic AND snide. I must subscribe to your newsletter. Email me a link to
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Vernon Davis! A Horsey!! WOO!!!
I now respect 0 players on the 49ers roster.
I’ll trade my soul for a Giants D that can get a stop when they need one.
Coughlin only accepts trades that occur 5 days before the trade deadline. Otherwise they are fined for being late.
The best way to get Coughlin to bite on your trade proposal is to send it over before 4 p.m. and describe it as the “early bird special”.
The best way to get John Elway to bite on your trade proposal is to conceal it inside an apple.
The best way to get Jim Irsay to balance the pros and cons of your trade proposal is to present it to him at a DUI checkpoint while he’s got a hooker and a convicted drug dealer waiting for him in the car.
The best way to get Andy Reid to bite on your trade proposal is to put it anywhere in the same zip code as him.
The best way to get Jared Lorenzen to bite on… JESUS, LORENZEN, I DIDN’T EVEN FINISH THE JOKE YET!
One more – The best way to get Chris Conte to bite on your trade proposal is to have it run a slant-and-go.
Fun fact: “Slant-and-go” is how Bill Parcells refers to the local Yoshinoya drive-through.
The best way to get Jerry Richardson to weigh and measure your trade proposal is to put it up for auction during cotton season.
The best way to get Rex Ryan to take a long, hard look at your trade proposal is to pay some young woman to have it tattooed on her ankle.
The best way to get Pete Carroll to pay attention to your trade proposal is HEY LOOK EVERYBODY A SQUIRREL!
Kaep gets f7red following the Blainassance.
I guess it’s just Kaep’s t7me o7 the mon7h.
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