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Was @ Phi: Over their last eight games the Eagles are doing the lousiness on D to an extent that is only surpassed by the Saints (of course). On t’udder side of the field Cousins is grasping for the Slurs QB throne with a 70% plus completion rating over the same period. Trouble is, them Washington folks have trouble winning when they have to take a stagecoach to a game. Folks, this is the NFC East’s homage to The Good, The Bad And The Ugly, all wrapped up in one debacle. Enjoy.
Your “What Night Is It Anyway?” NFC East Fiasco Open Thread
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It’s becoming apparent the Eagles don’t win so much as other teams lose.
This is the Cliff Notes for the entire NFC East.
With all the BLEERGH derp this year, I was just waiting for the horsecollar tackle in the pocket call.
Is there any better smell than he first shot out of a whiskey bottle?
How do you make a commercial with Norm and fried chicken awful?
So the effective offenses are to lure us in and bomb us with derp later, right?
My buddy just said, “it was a short week, Chip only put in the first series. He’s back on his standard S8 sheet now.”
Ok, one quarter of derp is all I can take. Waking up at 5am, so night all. Go [Redacteds] (for gambling purposes only).
That might come up
Well, this game made me crack tomorrow’s Jameson.
1-0 Ice Stillers woo
The penguins spiraling out while Ghost Bear drags the Flyers kicking and screaming into contention is helping to relieve the pain of the NFL season
HOLY SHIT JORDAN REED PLAYED BASKETBALL HE IS SURE TO BE WANKED BY ALL ANNOUNCERS FOREVER NOW
Riley Cooper would like you to know a white WR would have caught that.
So what I got from that commercial is somewhere in Star Wars: Battlefront is a naked Anna Kendrick.
So false advertisement?
Dear Jordan Reed. You are awesome and I bet you even smell good. Thanks for all the points, I hope you get a pony and lots of guaranteed money for Xmas.
Love,
Lots of Fantasy Owners
My yinzer buddy actively despises Reed for disappearing in the second half last week.
My wife still curses your name. Sometimes I wake up at night, and hear her mumbling in her sleep. It sounds like “bucking sim,” but I think the meaning is clear.
That’s totally fair.
Also, “195 points??? WHO THE FUCK DOES THAT?”
About 20% of that was all Cam. Dude’s a beast. He’s what RG3 could have been if he wasn’t breakable and on the Redskins.
That actually made it kind of worse…she had him last year, when he had his car accident.
If he’s not MVP, then we should burn PK in effigy. We should do that anyway, really.
Burning PK in effigy is something we can all enjoy. Cheers!
Reminder that this Eagles team beat the fucking Patriots
And there was much hilarious rejoicing.
A tree grew in Brooklyn. Then it got self-aware, and caught on fire, and exploded.
Actually, the worst part about the AFC’s recent collective bed shitting, it let’s the Pats still have a first round bye despite losing to the Eagles. Losing to an NFC East team should be an automatic loss of bye.
Jordan Reed is the new Tony González, gottdam this kid is good.
So PEDs?
THESE PHILADELPHIA EAGLES I CALL THEM THE OAKLAND RAIDERS CAUSE THEY COULDN’T COVER A TIGHT END IF THEIR LIVES DEPENDED ON IT.
Jordan Reed vs Eagles
“An explosion in Philly!”
So they overcharged their batteries?
anniversary of the MOVE home bombing.
…and here come the batteries!
Reminder: The Eagles, like all NFC East teams, are NAWT good.
They only had three dudes on Reed there, better go with four.
Poll–
If the [Redacteds] score on this drive, do they
A) Kick the XP
B) Go for 2
C) Raise FedEx parking prices
D. Send cards depicting Native Americans playing football to various Native American agencies.
I’m pretty sure Li’l Danny came when he read “C”
E.) Sue old ladies for cancelling their tickets
I simply cannot wrap my brain around the concept of Kirk Cousins being even ADEQUATE, let alone a positive force in footy contests.
It’s a Sparty kind of year.
Deceptively adequate.
It’s called Jordan Reed.
He’s a good fit for the one offense that Chubby Gruden knows how to coach. He also has some pretty decent people around him, the O-line somehow came together and he’s got Jordan Reed and good downfield receivers. Just think what an actually good QB could do in that situation!
Welp. Time to break out the cheesecake.
Oh dear god. So, Sky Sports shows recaps of the week before games instead of commercials, which is awesome. Except the TB/StL color rush game. It surprised me and I think I puked a little.
The uniforms or the bucs defense?
Okay, so apparently in the Independence Bowl on ESPN a team’s Long Snapper got hurt, so they replaced him with #8, but that was a penalty because the holder is also #8, so they replaced the holder who dropped the ball.
There is so much derp there, I don’t know where to begin.
Derp overload
Derperload
I really hope that was closed captioned as “dismissive wanking motion”
I’ll ask my brother. His wife’s deaf.
Yes, this is an actual photo of our tree. How it got there, no one knows…
MERRY MOOSEMAS!
CAUTION! Could be bloated reindeer.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/20103f042b2d11cadb0a70174552e664/tumblr_ngw138nOu81rwqiuko1_500.jpg
If not; RIGHT FUCKING ON!
In addition to the many, many reasons I love this place, having our own weird holiday is at the top of the list.
Weird? WEIRD?!?
Jordan Reed catching 150 and 3 TDs would really help me win my fantasy playoff game, so if someone could tell Kirk Cousins to keep throwing it to him, that would be great.
As a guy that is forced to start an inactive Dez and also had Odell, I echo these sentiments. Nothing sketchier than trying to win a championship with 3 TE’s in the lineup. The more ReedDowns and catches, the better!
It’s a derp off!
Who the fuck else would get an intentional grounding call other than the offense?!
Ryan Kerrigan REALLY wants someone to jerk him off, apparently
Is someone going to Last Boy Scout this game or can I go to sleep before the half?
Ain’t like a bitch?
BAWAHAHAHHAHAHAH BEEMER BALL
Again, this would be in the bag for the Redacteds if Dok were only PHYSICALLY IN THE GREATER PHILLY METRO AREA ,, smgdh
I actually really enjoy visiting Philadelphia, and they’re very nice people when sports aren’t involved, but I would absolutely have batteries chucked at me if I went to this game.
Hey there, Nautilus Tits…..
http://40.media.tumblr.com/dbc6685478463c944119d15fe52d86e3/tumblr_n64yfvNNkV1r3qv9to1_1280.png
I can only hope you’ve had the chance to try that line out for realz…
Aaaaaand this will be a one point game.
Classic Snyders
Garçon means “boy.” Bears repeating any time he is brought up.
“Peter Boy” was also Aaron Rodgers’s high school nickname.
What did #86 do?
Offsetting personal fouls after a score. That’ll teach ’em!
THIS GAME I CALL IT THE FRENCH AND INDIAN WAR BECAUSE THERE’S LOTS OF GUYS NAMED PIERRE ON THE REDSKINS AND IT’S PART OF A LARGER CONFLICT OFTEN REFERRED TO AS THE 7-9 GAMES WAR
Jordan Reed is what Jon Gruden might call a FOOTBALL PLAYER
Ha. I tricked my family into watching this shit.
Christmas surprises, part one:
My nephew has his hair done like Odell Beckham Jr’s. I love this kid. He’s great. But I’m gonna shave his fucking head soon if he doesn’t get rid of that nonsense.
Threaten him with a baseball bat.
Can’t. Out of all the nieces and nephews, he’s the one who figured out first I’d never hurt any of them.
I wouldn’t start worrying until he wants to go helmet-to-helmet with you
Tell him he’s suspended from next Christmas
What a lucky Pierre!
“Lucky Pierres” – a proud past Hippo FF team name
/yes, I intentionally auctioned both Garcon and Thomas to fit the predetermined name
So is Sam Bradford good?
No.
Like how Mussolini was good compared to Hitler
Oh great the old “made the trains run on time” argument again….
He made the offense run on time!
They came at him from his blind eye. I mean, side. Blind SIDE.
Chances of Iggles/G-Men being Week 17 SNF if Redacteds lose tonight – 100%.
Consider that when choosing sides tonight.
If Panthers win this week, they’ll be SNF Week 17.
Riverboat has strongly hinted that he will pull his starters at the half, at best.
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