![[DOOR FLIES OPEN]](https://doorfliesopen.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/DFO-MC-Patch.png)
"This site goes down so often we oughta change the name to “Dating Nancy Reagan”" – Horatio
The Eagles have released one Charles Edward “Chip” Kelly as head coach of the Philadelphia Iggles. I think our next DFO Prediction ContestT should be where does Chip end up: Tennessee Titans, U of Texas, USC, or choose your own adventure.
Anyhoo, so long Chip, we’ll always remember you as the guy who ran off all of your good players and then you and your cue cards got the boot.
On behalf of the Washington State half of Seahawks fans everywhere, speaking to the Oregon half: WE TOLD YOU SO, DUMBASS
Its pronounced du-mah.
/sips cognac from Oregon snifter
UGH. I didn’t enjoy this season, but honestly, I’m more mad that the team is now at least 2 or 3 years away from something good than happy Chip is gone. I don’t think he’s a bad coach. I think he’s a bad GM and had to learn how to be nice to people. It was probably untenable for him to stay simply because you can’t walk back giving him full control; you have to just fire him. And I blame Lurie for that. I don’t know anyone who thought that was a good idea.
What bums me out the most is that I think there is a fair chance that Belichick : Kelly and Browns : Eagles. He figured out what works on our dime and he’ll be much better somewhere else.
This makes me just a bit sad in that I was never able to draft a version of Ambiguously Racist Chip Kill for DFO that I liked.
“We’ll bring him in and give him roster control so he can get rid of this classless QB we got.”
-Panthers Fans
“Huh. Sam Bradford isn’t enough to save your job? I could have told you that.”
– Steve Spagnuolo
This post was fast, simple, and predictable. Chip would approve.
The Eagles are like a not-very-hot teenage stripper. There’s a string of bad men in the Eagle’s life, but each time the next one is totally THE ONE. You stay hopeful Eagles, and use your tips to sign up for that learning annex class. You’re so close to that secretary job!
I don’t know if the Eagles are better or worse without him, but what I do know is that I watched him systematically remove every one of my favorite players of the last 5 years, so fuck him.
Painful and fun at the same time, wasn’t it?
And PK has been shocked in haiku.
His first line is absolute truth though.
That’s why it’s the truth….MAYBE.
I’ve said it already, but I hope that trash fire in Baton Rouge tries to push Les Miles out the door again for Chip. It would be a marriage made in clusterfuck heaven.
Sadly he’s be an improvement at UCONN.
But then he’d probably get “Conn” and “coon” mixed up and holy shit could that get ugly quick.
EagLOLs going to stay the EagLOLs for a few more years, that’s for sure. BRING ON NORV!
The ESPN crawl says Lurie had been planning a structure change but Kelly “balked” at losing his player personnel control. HA HA CHIP YOU GET NOTHING AND LIKE IT
Chip’s ascension into Ralph Friedgen-hood has been halted…for now.
KILL IT WITH FIRE
More like kill it with cholesterol.
IT’S EATING THE CHOLESTEROL! IT’S ONLY GROWING MORE POWERFUL!
I hope this dude wears this jersey in the coming years while PHI tries to rebuild from the garbage roster Chip left them. In true fan form, when Sean Peyton has them at 6-2 going into the bye next season, this guy can spout off that he’s just doing it with Chip’s guys.
What has otherwise been a civil (well, civil for WIP) discourse, there are far too many callers (and the host) who think it’s time for Iggles to hire Gruden or Cowher.
Ha ha, that’s silly. Jay Gruden already has a coaching job.
What a jackwagon.
Some things just don’t work out; hubris accounts for a lot of these things.
I would like the door to fly open and Wolfman Rob be idling the van outside of Jeffrey Luries office blaring Rocket by Def Leppard. I think he knows what to do.
It is Philly’s destiny to be led by a Ryan.
You misspelled “Colts”
Maybe Chip Kelly asked for this and did not want to get fired on NFL Coaching Black Monday, because, ya know…
You are a Shady truther!!!
I read it as Chip wanting out now so he can poach the best JV job after bowl season.
Exactly what I said to the guy at the craps table who broke the news to me. Right before I lost all my money. Hey, Lurie, I’m available!
Lord (that is, Capitalism), keep Chip off the Titans.
This is obviously what is going to happen.
If he got fired by cue card, that would be the best thing ever.
Baby white rhino with a sailor cap (dummy call; real call: BBQ tongs)
Someone should do a photoshop of that Love Actually scene featuring Chip Kelly and Jeff Lurie.
It’s New Year’s Eve
And on New Year’s Eve
You tell the truth
And the truth is
We spent a fortune on Demarco Murray
And for some reason Ryan Matthews
And we traded
Actually traded(!)
For Sam Fucking Bradford
And we still suck
And the players hate you
Except for Riley Cooper
So the truth is
Your ass is outta here.
All of these are written on batteries which are hurled at Kelly’s head.
PERFECT
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.