It’s Here! It’s Here! Your Very First DFO Playoff Game Open Thread

A cynic (myself) might say that this game doesn’t look very good but we’re in “PLAYOFF MODE” now. LOSER GOES HOME…JUST LIKE THE WINNER! Okay, I’m sure you know what I mean because we all type English here. We’ve endured some weird crap over the course of the season and now it’s win or you’re gone time.

KC @ HOU: Does anyone remember the 1-5 Chiefs? They were without not only hope but also J.C. and were looking at the likes of Spencer “Who?” Ware and Charcandrick “Huh?” West to right the ship running game-wise. And umm, WOW! they did it. That actually happened. The even more surprising occurrence was the transformation of QB Smith from a “Spaghetti-Armed Game Manager” into a “Spaghetti-Armed Slight Difference-Maker”! Wonders will simply not cease to exist no matter how much I want them to… This has to be HC Reid’s best coaching job, don’t you think? Speaking of thinking, methinks the only way for the Texans to get out of this with a win is for their two most dominant players to go nuts, right? If DE Watt collapses his side of the line on an on-going basis and WR Hopkins catches 12+ balls things have a chance of going Houston’s way. If either becomes a non-factor the odds of a W drop to very close to nil. DE Clowney was held out of practice, was in on Thursday and was out again on Friday. He and his willingness to play hard on every down are listed as questionable.

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litre_cola

BAHAHAHAHAAHA

ThursdaySkyGoddess

HOYERCEPTION PART DEUX: BRING ON DOOPYPANTS!!!

ballsofsteelandfury

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

WCS

HOYERFATMANCEPTION

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

LMAOception

Doktor Zymm

YUP THERE IT IS.

entropy

Reid needs a minute to stop laughing after that stupid ass call, signals time out.

Doktor Zymm

Don’t they have extra helmets?

Spur

That was so anticlimactic

Sill Bimmons

Wow.

That was some serious jackassery.

MikeWallaceAndGromit

What a god awful play.

ballsofsteelandfury

WTF IS THIS SHIT?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Aw, I wanted Watt to fumble.

King Hippo

ME TOO. Temporarily overruled how much I want the Chefs to lose.

entropy

Oh joy, Watt and Wilfork on offens.

fleshwound_NPG

BWHAHAHAHAHA

Doktor Zymm

Wilfork and JJ Watt on offense. Millions of sportswriters everywhere splooge simultaneous.

Romonobyl

Christ…here’s Watt on offense.

Romonobyl

For a loss of two…brilliant.

...

Oh fuck this. Fuck you Bill O’Brien.

Senor Weaselo

Watt to Wilfork for ultimate fat guy touchdown?

MikeWallaceAndGromit

FADE TO WILFORK

Sill Bimmons

Foot…ball…?

fleshwound_NPG
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Guys, my “something interesting” alarm went off, what did I miss?

Doktor Zymm

Long Blue Run

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

In honor of FNL… I mean Texas football and stupid comebacks. Have some Minka Kelly (I had this half written before the play)

http://heightandweights.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/934_minka-kelly-1195814235.jpg

Bortleback

She’s looking a lot more top heavy than I remember!

Spur

She has Jeter stank on her.

King Hippo

CHRIST, Alfred Blue is slow. Scotchy, with his AVERAGE ATHLETICISM scores on that

Bortleback

It’s possible that the Texans are only going to throw it to Hopkins in this game. Their other receivers might as well just go home.

Doktor Zymm

Off Season Prediction : DeAndre Hopkins to the Giants

hippofant

Holding was on the DEFENSE, not on the two offensive linemen grabbing the defensive tackle?!?!?!

entropy

Exactly!! I was watching that choke hold and waiting for the flag.

WCS

Off topic, but, nothing gets cats more excited than an empty cardboard box. Even two cats that at their most cordial ignore each other, and at their worst actively try to disembowel the other can reach zen-like peace with each other when hiding inside this new, walled space made of scratchy stuff.

Sill Bimmons

Even an empty plastic bag?

ThursdaySkyGoddess

I can’t even begin to say how much time I’ve wasted watching Maru the cat jump in boxes on YouTube.

King Hippo

yes, tis why they like Xmas so much, even if’n they’s not saved.

entropy

Wow. Where the hell was BLEERGH on that hold?

MikeWallaceAndGromit

Only the worthy are showered with his blessings.

Sill Bimmons

All this pales in the face of the real question on everyone’s lips…

comment image

MikeWallaceAndGromit

Chiefs already benching their defensive starters. Don’t want to get them hurt for the next game.

Spur
Romonobyl

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think it’s time for The Doops.

Doktor Zymm

Shoop a Doop!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
litre_cola

Sweet Jesus, we are still getting Christmas commercials for McDonalds up here.

King Hippo

guess which fat, Mexican, creepily narrow eyebrowed kicker I started in the DFO playoffs contest??

ballsofsteelandfury

Santos is Mexican? I thought for sure he was something else.

King Hippo

oh shit BRAZILIAN

ballsofsteelandfury

Ain’t no Mexicans named Cairo.

They’d get their asses kicked.

King Hippo

I got him confused with his division mate Lambo. Que lastima.

Senor Weaselo

Here’s a-no-ther one and done…

Sill Bimmons

Pitt whooping Notre Dame’s asses in the basketing-ball ICYMI

King Hippo

My wolves may (and do) suck, but it’s nice to see UVA and ND get their shit pushed in too.

Doktor Zymm

If JJ Watt is so great, why does it take 60 of him to make a decently bright incandescent lightbulb?

entropy

He’s great, not bright. There’s a difference.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

In his defense, only 44 of him with the new halogen standard

ballsofsteelandfury

75 minimum

Romonobyl

I wonder what his LED equivalent is? CFL even…

litre_cola

Was Cameron Wake until he went to the Fins. Now, I don’t know, I don’t follow the CFL.

MikeWallaceAndGromit

You can always just pump up the Wattage. May require HGH brand light bulbs.

Romonobyl

You know what this thread needs?

MOAR JJ WATT!!!!!!!

entropy

OUT

ThursdaySkyGoddess
Spur

I don’t envy the guys that have to tackle Kelce.

fleshwound_NPG