Your “Satan Has Taken His Toll, And He Took It Out On Me” Monday Evening Open Thread

NFL News:

• The Cardinals have hired Steve Wilks, Panthers 2017 Defensive Coordinator, as their new head coach.
  • He also interviewed with the Titans and Giants, likely as Rooney-rule fulfillment.

• Pat Shurmur is expected to become the Giants new head coach.
  • It’s his second crack at being a head coach. His first dance was with the Browns, going 9-23.

• New Titans coach Mike Vrabel has future endeavored Dick Lebeau.
  • Lebeau had a 59-year NFL career as a player (Detroit) and coach (plenty).
    • He still ranks 10th all-time in terms of career interceptions.

• Fire up the Camaro – it looks like Todd Haley to the Browns!
  • FINALLY, Cleveland has a chance to cover the spread against the Steelers.
  • Ooh, and he’s got references:
    • Hall of Fame quarterback Kurt Warner endorsed Haley last week, tweeting, “I know if I had anything left in this old body, I would sign up tomorrow to work and play for Todd again.”

• ABC has backed out of the bidding for Thursday Night Football.
  • They don’t believe they can make a profit on the broadcasts, which CBS & NBC paid a combined $450 million for in 2017.
  • It looks like the Shonda Rhimes broadcasting block is safe, for now.

• Raise a toast to Jimmy Garoppolo’s agent.
  • Under his contract, he’s due to receive $79,000 for the Patriots making the Super Bowl.
  • He stands to earn more depending upon the outcome of the game – $56 K if they lose; $112K if they win.

Finally, there is an actual asteroid expected to pass close-to-earth on Super Bowl Sunday.

• Asteroid 2002 AJ129 will miss earth by 2.6 million miles, so I guess we have to root for tidal wave now.

I’m actually depressed about the Super Bowl. Well, maybe not “depressed”, because I don’t want to diminish the term. Frustrated doesn’t seem like enough, and it’s definitely not anger. I find myself just not wanting to watch the game. I can’t even muster the sentiment to want to hate-watch the game. I don’t know what’s wrong.

Luckily, I found the answer in my metal collection.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=toifnKW4LZs

Tonight’s sports:

• WWE – Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet 360
  • Tonight is a combination “go-home” show before the Royal Rumble this Sunday and celebration of being on the air in this format for 25 years.
    • Expect lots of cameos but few actual mean-anything matches.
  • They have a pretty good promo video for it.

• NHL:
  • Red Wings at Devils – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
  • Lightning at Blackhawks – 8:30PM | NBCSN
• NBA:
  • Heat at Rockets – 8:00PM | TSN2
• NCAA:
  • Men’s
    • Maryland at Indiana – 7:00PM | FS1
    • U*NC at Virginia Tech – 7:00PM | ESPN
    • Michigan State at Illinois – 9:00PM | FS1
    • West Virginia at TCU – 9:00PM | ESPN
  • Women’s
    • Ohio State at Maryland – 7:00PM | ESPN2
• Tennis:
  • Australian Open: Quarterfinals coverage – 9:00PM | ESPN2 / TSN

Maybe my mood will improve over the next two weeks.