Your “Finally!” And “It’s All Over After This?!” Super Bowl Open Thread

Well, somehow we made it. I’m so glad that we didn’t have to turn the car around due to bad behavior. Does everyone know which teams are playing? That’s what I thought. Between that and Hippo’s excellent breakdown of the game I’ve nothing to say about that end of things but I would like to share with you some “behind the scenes” tidbits about this very site that I think you might be interested in. I’m not going to name names…just yet.

Way back in 2007 the founder of this site, a grizzled, PTSD-wracked veteran of 3 tours of the second invasion of Iraq (anyone that has a beef with this version of events can take it up with me in the boardroom tomorrow morning) decided that there should be a new-ish football site. With a ton of moxy and just one good arm he created “Abandon Hope All Ye Football Fans That Enter”. That site was a disaster. I mean, it was right there in the title. Who the hell would want to join? Years later, after his extended recuperation at the St. Tunison Sanitarium For The Hopeless he decided to give it one more go.

It was a super-tough haul, putting this site together with nothing more than used scotch tape and pigeon feathers but he got the damn thing to work. But would Door Flies Open fly? A number of lawyers flocked to the site but it was immediately apparent that as a result, the site lacked “any sense of a moral compass”, according to internet pundits. At that point the site was opened up to almost everyone. Normal people came to the site in the dozens-including yours truly.

What followed was a ton of hard work. Night after night, huddled together in a dumpster underneath a single street lamp, we batted around the questions. “How can we take this site to the next level?” and “Is no one going to throw some pizza crusts in here?-I’m hungry!” and “Could you please not urinate on my pizza crust?”. We learned a lot about each other. Who knew that someone could be triggered by two exclamation marks but not one or three? And the hygiene, OH, THE PERSONAL HYGIENE!

So here we are now. We’ve morphed into a mid-major behemoth of a football-specific website that is bound to knock off a #2 or #3 ranked site as soon as we’re allowed back into the tourney. “Ongoing Pattern of Irregular Prescriptions”, my ass. The Internet is clearly out to get “The Little Site That Could”. We’ll survive and thrive…and maybe, just maybe, I can finally get that $12 Toys R Us coupon I was promised at the outset…

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
2.3K Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

At what point after bar close do you stop expecting messages from a hot chick that tends bar. 1 hour? 2? I guess wrong often and she assumes I wasn’t waiting for her to annoy me in the middle of the night.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

OK; tomorrow may be a bit ruff. Hope they still won when I wake up and it wasn’t a flashback of some sort.

http://49.media.tumblr.com/2f3f78dae5ca8cb644d8d433f35bdb49/tumblr_n8jxme8ZZf1tdlxvoo1_400.gif

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

@Moose I think the Bears at least sign Travathen, maybe Wolfe and do nothing else free agent wise in the offseason. I think someone else is gonna take the remaining free agents though

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Or they might even sign Trevathan if I could spell his name right

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Here is the list; I put a X by the ones I think they will sign (Wolfe is already signed).

The Broncos feature 17 unrestricted free agents, leaving some tough decisions this offseason as the team tries to keep the defense together while beefing up the offense:

OLB Von Miller XXXXX

DE Malik Jackson X

QB Brock Osweiler X

ILB Danny Trevathan X

RB Ronnie Hillman

S David Bruton X

DB Omar Bolden X

TE Vernon Davis

LG Evan Mathis

DE Antonio Smith X

OT Ryan Harris

OT Tyler Polumbus X

WR Andre Caldwell

WR Jordan Norwood X

WR Kyle Williams

S Josh Bush

S Shiloh Keo

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Brock Osweiler could get an offer that the team cannot match. Same with Malik Jackson. There is a bunch of players that will go that are under contract.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Yeah, I will have to admit I didn’t know the Wolfe thing and that was expertly presented for 3 am. I mean nice work sir.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

At this point I trust Elway and his worker bees to make mostly correct decisions.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Thank you fuckers for putting up with my shit…. and my liberal use of the site’s bandwidth.

http://41.media.tumblr.com/2f4406e416a2319500e6132b0262d5ec/tumblr_ncqpnv1Wyn1tfso6xo1_500.png

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
JerBear50

Congrats on the win Moose. I was glad to see the MVP not go to a fucking qb. Manning already has one SB MVP he had not business winning.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

That Super Bowl never happened. I will not accept someone saying it did

JerBear50

You mean the Bowl where Urlacher over-pursued to the sideline only to get sealed out by a guard and leave the middle wide open, play after fucking play, allowing all-world RB Dominic Rhodes to pick up eight yards a pop? Is that the game that didn’t happen, because I’d like to forget about it also.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I loved the defensive game; I’m sure many cunts didn’t like it…. oh, sorry, people who like offense no matter what. The defense KNEW they had this game, it was exactly like most this year. Fucking A. Cam had the same look on his face that Brady had two weeks ago (PK gasp and squirts a small turn in his cargo pants). It’s true; Wade the dumb bumpkin out schemed and out planned good offenses all year. The errors by Carolina were forced, which, to me made the game spectacular. The halftime “analysis”; FUCK YOU; “Manning has got to play better is they want to win. Who was leading? Were you even fucking watching?? Same to the “analysis” all week; I had my doubts, but I knew they were not going to roll over that defense. I love Miller getting the MVP; no choice and a bif FUCK YOU to those who hate giving it to a defensive player. TD handing over the trophy; FUCK YOU Goodell!! The HoF voters; FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOU, fucking assholes!!

OK, it feels pretty good. Sorry Rikki; I know,

http://57.media.tumblr.com/ea701890f77a4f2b0604802e012b9e4c/tumblr_nx09hpQQFg1s01qkyo1_500.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Sorry, but some of the vindication for the peeps feels pretty good.

http://49.media.tumblr.com/8ba1072754984c7021f066d81764a7c5/tumblr_nx47jgss2W1ugwriro1_400.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The adds; apparently if you wave a big enough check in front of people they will whore for anything…. but we knew that.

http://36.media.tumblr.com/d501fc4ec0759ea72f4958b220c47a16/tumblr_nswx14LBSf1qgklp0o1_540.png

WCS

Enjoy the shit out of it. God knows I would.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Thank you. I think I enjoyed the P*ts game almost as much. Congratulations on getting past your obstacle at work.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I just thought the game was shitty to watch, not because it was defensive. Was totally on board for a defensive battle and rooting for your team. Also I really hope the Bears steal like 3 of your free agents from your defense this offseason

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

They can’t sign all of them for sure. To me the ads and the time between plays made it shitty, not the game itself.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Sorry if I’m sounding like a dick. I obviously had absolutely nothing to do with their success. It just feels good right now. The other thing that was nice with a defensive win; it really feels like a team win [cliche alert] but it does.

http://49.media.tumblr.com/2a572a70818510f07f82c187637911d4/tumblr_o230kynKDG1qba7k2o1_500.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

First off; congratulations to the Panthers for a great season and Cam for doing most of the offensive production himself. Denver had the perfect game plan for him and his receivers did not help. The line was not ready for a peaking Denver D… holy shit. Cam didn’t derp it, he got it ripped the fuck away from him. The front seven was a perfect match against them because of the speed and athleticism. Wade, oh Wade; sitting at home when what? 57 DCs hired ahead of him?

http://49.media.tumblr.com/0591173074370659ce10c370e43cff3a/tumblr_o0kosmwABn1rpe379o2_540.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I really hope the Panthers get back; Cam is fun to watch.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am still around listening to FotC. so

FotC – Carol Brown

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWLG7OQCuFo

I could have posted boobs I guess but listening to FotC now and that seems more fun at the moment

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Could we put him in another fucking cell?!?

Porky Prime

comment image

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I think this thread is in need of some Flight of the Conchords

FotC – Most Beautiful Girl in the Room

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=56ekY8TMJ4w

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I probably songs have eaten more food today

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Should

JerBear50

Why eat? It just makes the alcohol have to try harder.

WCS


Miracle and Backdraft

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Who watched Backdraft more than once? I obviously misspoke earlier and meant Tombstone, but no one wants to watch Backdraft again.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Aw come on Donald Sutherland scenes

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

This was saved under my music tab links. I might have to watch 1 or 2 Kurt Russell movies tonight now that I listened to it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f1JYDmo19to

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I obviously mean Overboard and Tango & Cash

Porky Prime

Captain Ron and Sky High?

WCS

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Sorry to have missed all the fun, folks. It’s 10:24 here in San Diego and my hosts have gone to bed. I am staying up for a bit drinking their ginger rum. This has been a great season with you all and I really am touched that so many folks saw fit to join us here. You people rule.

Porky Prime

Is that just rum with some ginger tossed in it or distilled that way? Either way it sounds great.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t know but it tastes like a dark and stormy but like 3x as strong.

Porky Prime
Porky Prime

FUCK YOU JPEGS.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I was gonna post a clip from the Bizarro ep that was incredibly annoying, I didn’t. Your welcome

Porky Prime

There are no annoying Sealab clips.

Okay, maybe a couple with Tornado Shanks.

Porky Prime
Senor Weaselo

All right friends, I’m off. You’ve been great, and now the slog of the offseason begins.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Don’t worry, #content’s a-coming!

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Nope, sorry, you get no offseason here, there were like 90 things we decided to liveblog earlier and you better show up. None of that KSK bullshit where you have to show up for the draft and then get a couple months off

Porky Prime

Well the Gay Super Bowl is a given.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Eagles of Death Metal – I only want you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHY1xCl4Qak

Senor Weaselo

“Hey Peyton, could you just have said ‘I’m going to Disneyland’ and not explain it? Thanks.”

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

You are gonna get at least one more Eagles of Death Metal song after this one

Eagles of Death Metal – Speaking in Tongues

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bnrS4lFnGQk

laserguru

Not quite the last song.

Porky Prime

Neat. Hey from what I gather you had a nice little night going there. Congrats. I don’t miss being single but I am fully aware there are certain things I can never go back to. Like first impressions and butterflies and whatnot. Sounds cool no matter the final outcome, u go boi.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

laserguru

Gentlemen, We have to protect our phony baloney jobs!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

harumph harumph!

Senor Weaselo

Harumph harumph harumph!

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Unless you are a Rage Against the Machine super fan I would guess you couldn’t name the album this is from. Or maybe you could. I can’t remember and I was a 90’s kid.

Just looked it up, Godzilla soundtrack or international versions of The Battle of Los Angeles. So yeah no one has heard this

Rage Against the Machine – No Shelter

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_BN6AcK090

WCS


I love this song. I have the single. While it was a little strange that a band like RATM would lend themselves to a movie soundtrack, the lyrics sort of show they did it as a point against capitalism.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I really enjoy the fact you know somehow know of this song. I don’t think anyone I know in my real life knows that song and but I l love it

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I remember that song. The ’90s were awesome.

Porky Prime

I agree. But if you asked me in the 90s I would have laughed bitterly.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Another Nirvana song from the Unplugged show

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HjKcCGaCiu0

Unsurprised

I had to add the Curb theme song to that video of Eli Manning.

https://scontent-sea1-1.cdninstagram.com/t50.2886-16/12693727_1096557107045055_859703132_n.mp4

1 24 25 26