Your March Madness Selection Sunday and Bracket Contest Open Thread

Boy, that was a long title, wasn’t it?  Anyhoo, our good buddy Upstate Underdog set up a Group for DFO over at the ESPN site for all of us to join and show our shortcomings.  The information is below:

Group name: DOOR FLIES OPEN!
Password: dfo2016

Everyone join the party and we may, JUST MAY, have prizes for the winner just like we did for the DFO Prediction Contests earlier this year.  Tell you what, since Moose traded in his booze winnings for a nice original drawing by entropy (a wise choice indeed), I will put that up for the winner of this contest.  Whoever wins will get a fine bottle of their choice of fine liquor shipped to them by me.  Good luck, y’all!

And now, feel free to discuss the shortcomings of the Selection Committee:

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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WCS

Man, St. Joe’s got buttfucked like a Catholic school boy.

King Hippo

Well, their #1 IS Oregon…

scotchnaut

I’m as sure of Cuse getting in as I am that a tornado sounds like a train…

https://youtu.be/zE8oOfWocVc

Senor Weaselo

Wait, AND Oregon gets one of the play-in 16s? In theory wouldn’t that make them one of the two top seeds? What kind of bullshit is that?

King Hippo

I’m getting “TRUSTED” commercials. HELP ME

Then, thank fuck, HERE COMES HillyBob!!!! <3

Horatio Cornblower

“Because Daddy went to art school.”

WHAT A FAGGOT AMIRITE!?

JustStopDude

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Horatio Cornblower

Some bold choices there by Chuck B.

Chalk all the way through.

King Hippo

and he thought/rambled a good 3 minutes over each pick.

WCS

Charles Barkley is so high.

King Hippo

He seems like a pill guy, no?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Thunderstorm rolls thru, I lose signal. Thanks DirecTV and Obama.
I know KU is #1 overall, beyond that I got nuthin’.
Guess I’ll scroll back and read.
/bonus….comments here are Clark Kellogg free.

JustStopDude
JustStopDude
Sill Bimmons

Epic.

Sill Bimmons

Is this a Tim and Eric sketch?

Bloody Lethal

Hey uh you guys left me on Yeah Right’s pity party over there.

Horatio Cornblower

Figures. We have a party and I’m stuck in this damn locker.

WCS

Philly Big 5 is going to get three teams in the field, and I’d pay good money to see a Round of 32 match-up of Nova-Temple.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Fight…fight…fight.

Come this fall to CBS, America’s new hit sitcom, Charles Barkley sucks at technology.

scotchnaut

I like Bill Self. He’s managed to keep kids around-Wayne Seldon Jr. has been with the program for 6 years and Perry Ellis is on his ninth.

/that said, Kansas can go fuck itself

Senor Weaselo

You can graduate any time you want, but you can never leave.

/Shows self out
//…Fuck. No pun intended either.

Sill Bimmons

The guys shooting basketballs in the background suck.

JustStopDude

I like had an ESPN account a long ass time ago…that I used maybe once…and not cannot remember what the fuck the password is for.

So I will just…something something…fart joke…

Horatio Cornblower

And now Bill Self will tell us everything he knows about winning in March.

“Try not to play Northern Illinois”

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

#65thComment #LastOneIn

Senor Weaselo

There’s 68 in the tournament now, joke’s on you!

/The First Four should not count as the first round.
//Lukewarm at best taek

King Hippo

Either this year or next, it quits being “first round” and is “preliminary” or something like that. I swear I read that last Smarch.

I would love to rail pills with Barkley.

Senor Weaselo

It’s about fucking time. Every time I see the first two rounds as “Second and Third Rounds” bad thoughts come into my head. I don’t even know about what, but bad things.

Other things that anger me that way are things like how this tournament, you know, March Madness, ends in April. Also how the World Series now ends in November.

Senor Weaselo

How high is Lil Wayne for these Galaxy commercials?

Horatio Cornblower

Why limit it to the commercials?

King Hippo

Hawaii will beat Cal, they SUCK. Maryland vastly underseeded and could give KS a game. This is early front-runner for Bracket of Death.

WCS

#10 Temple over #7 Iowa could be trendy upset pick.

scotchnaut

I’d take that in a heartbeat.

King Hippo

An 11/6 is the minimum to qualify as an upset in Hippo’s book.

Horatio Cornblower

Hippo’s book is the Necromicon.

King Hippo

It’s great to keep in the loo ,, ppl forget that

Senor Weaselo

“Wichita State-Vanderbilt can’t be in Wichita like I said because it wouldn’t be neutral? WEIRD.” -PK

WCS

Vandy getting in spells serious trouble for Syracuse and Michigan.

King Hippo

Wichita wasn’t even on my radar to get in. Ruh roh indeed.

Horatio Cornblower

Monmouth is going to get fucked…HARD.

King Hippo

King Rice has always been a Grade A douchebag, so HAHA!

Horatio Cornblower

Vanderbilt-Wichita in a play-in?

You have my attention Committee.

Sill Bimmons

IRONICALLY WICHITA WOULD NOT BE A NEUTRAL SITE IN THIS CASE

Sill Bimmons

GO SHOCKERS

King Hippo

Man, Nova got BONED

Sill Bimmons

Kids who go to UNC — Asheville have the right idea.

Horatio Cornblower

Anyone else nauseous at the luxury theater Kansas had for the basketball team?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Ah, memories.

Horatio Cornblower

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WCS

UCONN not only gets in, but very safely. Smarch Madness in the locker.

scotchnaut

“THE FLY IS OPEN! GO PEAY!

Horatio Cornblower

See ya later Austin Peay

Horatio Cornblower

See ya later UCONN

WCS

There are more country music award shows than Cromartie children.

Sill Bimmons

Name five music genres more circle-jerky than country. You can’t.

scotchnaut

Barkley is just wingin’ it, right?

WCS

Isn’t he always?

Horatio Cornblower

If by that you mean he not only hasn’t prepared but is shoveling chicken wings into his mouth every second the camera isn’t on him then yes.

Senor Weaselo

In fairness, I’d do that too.

Horatio Cornblower

If UCONN gets a 7 seed I’m picking them to win the whole damn thing.

/they will not do this.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Hey, just remember what happened the last time they unexpectedly won their conference tournament.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I just got back from seeing 10 Cloverfield Lane. Not going to say much, but it met my expectations and is worth seeing in theatres.

Now come on and get in SDSU!

WCS

’twas a good’un. Glad we saw it.

Horatio Cornblower

Does John Goodman collapse from total heart failure? Because I keep expecting that to happen in every movie he does.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I’m sure the thought crossed his mind.

scotchnaut

I’m sure it’ll be in the gag and clutch his chest reel.

Senor Weaselo

No Michigan State 1 seed?

scotchnaut

Oregon a #1? THE WHOLE TOURNAMENT IS A JOKE!

WCS

Oregon?!

Horatio Cornblower

Obviously the Selection Committee is in the pocket of Big Nike.

This is probably more true than this joke implies.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t see a joke here at all.

Sill Bimmons
Horatio Cornblower

Poor Papouli.

Sill Bimmons

He died as he lived — as series of 1s an 0s in an old BASIC computer game.

scotchnaut

C’mon Cuse-I’d love to see you lose a play-in game!

King Hippo

I still like writing in the teams by hand as they are announced. It irritates me that I now have to print a blank bracket, as opposed to just cutting one out of the Sunday paper (they quit carrying it a few years back).

/shakes fist at cloud

Sill Bimmons

Jesus christ.

What are you, like 80?

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King Hippo

only in SPIRIT

herodotus450

What a lazy millennial, just buy your own printing press and make your own newspaper bracket!
http://www.alibaba.com/product-detail/SNP56-II-Automatic-newspaper-printing-press_60122719041.html?spm=a2700.7724857.29.3.yrKr6D&s=p

WCS

WCS Projected No. 1 & 2 seeds:

#1s
Kansas (No. 1 overall)
1. Michigan State (Izzo is a sorcerer; there’s no other way to describe it)
UNC (guh)
UVa

#2s
Villanova
Oregon
Xavier
Oklahoma

SELECTION SUNDAE IS THE BEST

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King Hippo

The cousinfuckers deserve the #2 ahead of Boomer Sooner, but I get more upset points (in my office pool) if’n youse a #3 so I’m all for it.

Horatio Cornblower

Oregon stole it. I would say that this is total bullshit but I have no idea if this is true or not.

King Hippo

It is. The Pac 12 eats all the ass.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Interesting, I would have thought a gif of someone squealing would be more associated with West Virginia.

Sill Bimmons

The only thing I know about college basketball is that if Pitt does make it in they’re not beating anybody.

scotchnaut

LIAR!

/they could play Syracuse

Horatio Cornblower

I see we’re dick-stepping threads again. Anyone mind if I take down the one with no comments on it?

scotchnaut

DO IT!

WCS

I’m okay with that, but, it’s also not my post.

Horatio Cornblower

Scotchnaut wrote and gave permission so ’tis been deleted. I am drunk with power. Hopefully I can remedy that soon with beer.

scotchnaut

Oh Shit!

WCS

#THREADPACOLYPSENOW

Sill Bimmons

Statement win by the Ice Stillers today.

This isn’t Sid, Geno and the Chucklefucks anymore.

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lv1fdwaHg01qzthxgo2_500.gif

WCS

I love college basketball, this is my Christmas morning. I won my office pool in 2008, ’09, and 2011. Naturally, I’ll come in dead last.

SonOfSpam

No Bruins, no Anteaters, why bother?

/watches every second of every game

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