The last day of the coma is always such a bummer, because all I can think about is how close to being over it is, and the looming specter of fucking Monday. Also FUCK YESTERDAY.
7S Iowa vs. 2S Villanova (12:10, CBS)
The ultimate acid test in “just how cursed is Jay Wright?” Iowa did everything in its power to choke away its 1st round game, yet somehow beat Temple on an OT buzzer-beating tip-in. Still, they give the impression of being held together with duct tape and chicken wire at the moment.
14E Stephen F. Austin vs. 6E Notre Dame (2:40, CBS)
Not exactly the matchup the suits expected when this game was allotted an exclusive national slot, I’m guessing. The Irish are pretty consistent offensively, so I doubt the cards are there for SFA to beat the house again and crash the Sweet Sixteen party. They still have the tourney’s best beard, though…
10W VCU vs. 2W Oklahoma (5:10, CBS)
These aren’t the Rams of yesteryear, Boomer Sooner should roll in this one. Iowa State has already slain its early round demons, so perhaps Lon Kruger gets to do the same. Would love to see both squadrons in the Final Four.
15MW Middle Tennessee vs. 10MW Syracuse (6:10, TNT)
Jim Boeheim’s briliant “win one for Scotchy!” motivational campaign is paying off, even working reverse mojo on Sparty. I have no idea if the Blue Raiders will even get off the bus for this one, coming off the immense sugar high of Friday’s fun.
13S Hawaii vs. 5S Maryland (7:10, TBS)
I have been wrong in all of my similar pronouncements…but I think this will be a very fun game to watch for the neutral viewer. The Rainbow Warriors could give the Turtle significant trouble, but a veteran team won’t fold as easily as Cal did.
11W Northern Iowa vs. 3W Texas A&M (7:40, truTV)
For two more hours tonight, truTV gets to be a thing again! Hashtag, suckmyass.
7E Wisconsin vs. 2E Xavier (8:40, TNT)
Unleash your inner Catler, everybody. DOOOOOOONNNNNNN’T CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRE
8W St. Joe’s vs. 1W Oregon (9:40, TBS)
Will I DVR this, just in case Toddler Blood Martelli pulls it off? MAYBE.
http://i.imgur.com/jeBNsqn.gif
I CAN’T STOP THE TEARS
Big Shoutout to EastLink-the ISP that kept almost 150,000 sons o’ bitches in northern Ontario from typing their stupid screeches for more than nine hours. #luvya!
Fucking Canadia, man.
That’s the kind of quality that results in a #10 vs. #15 matchup!
I always get confused, was Stephen F. Austin the original lead singer of Van Halen or was it Steely Dan?
The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band.
http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/glee/images/5/53/Duh_duh_duh.gif
GMC Canyon?
Come on GM.
You could have done the right thing:
Haha terrible UCONN parent is already back home from Buffalo Wild Wings. Now her shitty kids can whine to her while “art school” dad fucks off and finds a better family.
If anyone understands spanish and wants to enjoy a lazy Sunday watching a classic comedy, click play on the link below:
Grittiest, scrapiest, loves-the-game boat ever:
That’s not healthy.
MOURINHO TO THE MUD
http://elpais.com/elpais/2016/03/20/inenglish/1458483716_955779.html
http://laughjooks.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/mourinho-laughing.jpg
I really fucking hate the State Farm commercials…but honest to god, from a concept point, “The Hoopers” is better than 90% of the shit being green lit on network TV.
Methinks we have another Caveman TV series thing…
http://images.nymag.com/images/2/daily/entertainment/07/09/27_cavemen_lg.jpg
Yeah, but the most of the guys on “The Hoopers” ads have real, better paying jobs in the basketballing arena of the teevee box filling industry.
I actually like the Caveman show. I will watch anything with Kroll in it.
notre dame shuldve declined the 4 point play their if they were real christians its the holy trinity not the holy foursome smgdh,,,
I wouldn’t recommend googling “holy foursome” on your work laptop…
One of my top results:
http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s–Zm3hJqwD–/c_scale,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800/xi358dkbruqf27cbxss9.jpg
And a little farther down:
http://www.earthlymission.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/interesting-orchestra-woman-players-funny1.jpg
90% of these commercials are also about basketedball in some way; I’m already watching it, what is the point?
http://www.royharris.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/awareness.jpg
Did you know cancer can affect the breast?
You didn’t write it in pink, so no.
MOAR SINGIN REDNECK CIRCLE JERK PLEEAZE
My best friend of 30 years…. oh fuck we’re old… went to SFA, he’ texted me 30+ times all morning. Guy is beyond ecstatic SFA is looking this good, though he also knows they won’t last past the next round.
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_fwAP-TcBkaE/TTW6xw4Ny6I/AAAAAAAAA7Y/HOT_SaBoB-U/s1600/1291597007865.gif
Not at all disturbing…
http://vomzi.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/cute-scared-gif-498.gif
http://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/2211254/83768502.gif
How about this one?
ND huddle: Is Mike Brey gon’ have to choke a bitch?
Wow.
Allie’s head is like 20% of her height.
Not complaining, just an observation.
she has a ring on now. 🙁
/looks foar razor blades
I could make her about 3.2 inches taller later.
/call me Allie
http://37.media.tumblr.com/0e68d06fd447848fb0a563c84ff869e3/tumblr_n3jv4lkKU41smcbm7o1_400.gif
Oh Mike Brey…you NEVAR go full Tomsula…
Why is SFA the Lumberjacks? Does Tejas even have trees?
Because they like to put on women’s clothing and hang around in bars?
http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02738/lumberjack_2738207a.jpg
I hear they also enjoy buttered scones for tea on Wednesdays after they’re done shopping.
East Texas is full of trees.
It’s why the Koch brothers are so heavily invested in paper goods:
Angel Soft:
– Angel Soft Ultra
– Brawny paper towels
– Dixie cups (& napkins & plates)
– Insulair cups
– Perfect Touch cups, paper products
– Quilted Northern
– Sparkle paper towels
– Vanity Fair napkins & paper towels
– Mardis Gras napkins
– Zee Napkins
– Georgia Pacific products
Home/Office papers:
– Advantage
– Image Plus
– Spectrum
Other:
– American Greetings
(Kochs own minority
share)
Building supplies:
– Georgia Pacific
They should break the huddle “On three…WE’RE BUTCH!!!”
Sup?
http://media0.giphy.com/media/jNdw5Qmy5MOpq/giphy.gif
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vfObDTLaaI
hey
Oregon weather: Hey there buddy, remember when you saw the sun ALL DAY yesterday after not seeing it for what seemed like 8 months? Yea, I was just kidding. You need more grey skies and rain.
Me:
Hey CT weather, remember when it was 60 all last week and tonight we’re getting 4″-8″ of snow?
Fuck you.
Wow, you poor bastards.
I don’t feel so bad about our 80s down to 40s with light rain anymore.
Wooooo!!!!!!!
I’m still bitching, because had to turn my heat back on.
Yeah Trinity, good for you. It’s not really a secret that I’m a nerdy asshole. But thanks anyway.
I miss drugs.
That is all.
http://gifsec.com/wp-content/uploads/GIF/2014/04/Matrix-GIF.gif?gs=a
Well shit, that didn’t work.
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ALnsMYXT6HY/VoUPPIkAmRI/AAAAAAAAFV8/VAadywJAmQ4/s1600/matrix-agent.gif
There it is.
I feel slightly improved from yesterday and just in time for my annual family “Yay we’re Irish” get together today, don’t ask, scheduling issues.
I’m sure I’ll feel glorious tomorrow.
Should be pretty easy guessing the theme for next week’s Sunday Gravy.
Booze….?
You know when you develop a new nagging pain and you’re not even mad anymore because it’s just another in a series of dozens?
http://41.media.tumblr.com/e6798d3bab182512c6e4244cebdcdf07/tumblr_mscx4fbV9p1qg0rnuo1_500.jpg
It’s like that.
You know those guitars that are, like, double guitars?
I fucking love Ralph’s chocolate microscopes.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XMcQwjmyQd8/T7-rQX9x3bI/AAAAAAAAQBQ/rBel9h9WBjo/s400/chocolatemicroscope.jpg
“It’s amazing how the emotions change…”
Truly amazing.
Winning and losing the last game you’ll ever play are basically the same thing, right?
Winston Churchill V?
“We shall fight in our diapers, we shall fight in our bassinets…”
So, about the rocketmortage.kom commercial on CBS: The skinny lady in a dress stares at picture of an octopus attacking a ship and her lady parts get soooooo hot that the fireplace ignites near her crotch? Or m I reading something into this? I need Moose to make a ruling….
http://www.ilovegraphics.net/wp-content/2009/11/Unknown.JPG.jpeg
(Image unrelated to text.)
Yes, the tentacle/ladypart expert is definitely the Moose.
/sentence I never thought I’d say
Seems like something more in Balls’ wheelhouse.
Yeah, Moose posts them, but he does it as a joke to me.
I need more research on this subject…
Hmmmm….I am intrigued by this potential backstory.
I always thought the tentacle porn joke started in a bracket competition involving kinky stuff at the old place. Fetish bracket, maybe?
I had a professor just like that.
EAT SHITE SHITE
Well, Barcelona and Villareal tied at 2. This is after Atletico lost to Sporting Gijon yesterday. I guess the league is not such a runaway after all…
Mmmmm Gijon mustard..
I thought the same thing, LMAO.
/goes and sits in corner
hey guys
http://cdn.indiewire.psdops.com/dims4/INDIEWIRE/48f076f/2147483647/thumbnail/680×478/quality/90/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fdl9fvu4r30qs1.cloudfront.net%2F49%2F2c%2F29f2d5ef47ae90f105463deb23c6%2Fsan-andreas-dwayne-johnson-alex-daddario-911.jpg
Wow, those are great eyes. And for once I really AM talking about the eyes when I say that.
Hiya, Lloyd.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/f11b17e11327b36f45786b01af7ad480/tumblr_nfg2cqhVW61s0t6o2o1_250.gif
sup
just ate a taco
yo
lunch is gonna be late here
http://45.media.tumblr.com/d65e667b45c9f025652de481f1a37e23/tumblr_nhoq1vOAIO1syvjuco1_500.gif
http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/itsalwayssunny/images/0/09/FattyMcGoo.png
Iowa needs a hug.
http://www.cbsnews.com/news/uk-asks-public-to-name-boat-boaty-mcboatface-leads/
Oh please let this happen.
other popular name suggestions are “RRS Usain Boat, RRS Ice Ice Baby and RRS Boatimus Prime.”
People are idiots and I absolutely love when PR firms think, Oh this is a great idea, no one would dare ruin it.
I tried to vote but the site wouldn’t load.
Fuck it. I’m going back to bed.
I see the Iowa basketball team decided to mimic the football team’s performance in a post-season game.
Is Carly Fiorina rooting for them again?
I’m hoping if the blowout persists, maybe we can talk Allie LaForce into a striptease to make things interesting.
But I doubt we have that much luck.
That’s terrifying.
I want this for my apartment…
http://i.imgur.com/lAxJmOj.gif
‘Nova: Not fucking around today.
http://mgoblog.com/sites/mgoblog.com/files/images/Preview-Nebraska-2012_11A9/cat_eating_corn1_thumb.jpg
Aww
Cat eating the shit out of some corn (get it?)
I do now. I forgot who they were playing against.
Be interesting if Jay Wright thanks Satan in the post-game…
Nepotism is bad.
Is there any other sport where just when things actually get exciting, and indeed because they are exciting, someone calls a timeout?
Football?
Maybe baseball if you count pitching changes and mound visits (heh, mound visit) but then you’d have to consider baseball exciting in the first place.
Baseball barely meets the base definition of “activity.”
For the record, I am a huge baseball fan (though I do get that others are not…and why), but I am liking this comment because of the “mound visit” innuendo.
As much baseball as I have watched in my life, this had never occurred to me. Now whenever I hear it, it will never NOT occur to me.
A sincere thank you.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/998d4011244337d7e7a0f80f556665f1/tumblr_nk6r72gSCM1qgd9bmo2_250.gif
great, another shit-ass blowout
Sooo…struggling not to post a certain gif….
Ah sheeeet…shoving match on the pitch…full brawl in three…two…
never mind…the players just broke it off.
MLB has better brawls…
“If I wanted to see two negroes fight I’d throw a dollar bill out my window.” The old-school racism is hilarious.
I loved that secretary, for a brief moment.
The Clio episode where Don gets blackout drunk and Roger is reminiscing about how Don hustled him into a job is great. I wonder if Roger really did say “Welcome aboard” or Don just took his chances that Roger would sooner hire him than admit he’d say something while blacked out.
CBS cumbags, “I saw this player in a moment of solitude and privacy and thought before the game. Let’s see the footage of it!”
Oops, meant scumbags. I wouldn’t want to disgrace cumbags everywhere.
That reminds me of someone explaining why they don’t call people douchebags because at least those are useful.
So this is just down to Spurs and Leicester, right?
That’s a Texas sized 10-4.
it would take some massive cocking up to let City or Arsenal back in the race, but theoretically possible.
The Gunners are usually the ones who implode, and looking at this game right now it is truly wonderful that none of the “big 4” will win the league and 2 of them won’t be in the Champions League. WHERE IS YOUR MONEY GOD NOW?????
So its now the Manchester Chevy Dealerships have a 1-0 lead over the Manchester City UAE Airlines.
I enjoy that the American gubmt bailed out Chevy yet they can pay an astronomical amount to be on the Uniteds jersey.
Chevrolet sells cars in the UK too.
/it’s still stupid, jussayin’
OK ‘Nova…let’s see if you can avoid a repeat.
Sorry…Threepeat.
Assholes in trucks.
Oh, and a big SAINTS WOO to Sill, as I see Soton got THREE late goals to win a game I had totes given up on!!
So anyone watching Citeh v Red Devils?
Go team that doesn’t employ Fatass Wayne Rooney!!
I agree. As long as The Uniteds aren’t in the Champs league next year, I am good. Would prefer a draw here so Leicester can have more of an overall cushion.
Honest question…is it “derby” or “darby” they keep saying?
Related question…why is a soccer team in England named after an airline from the middle east?
This fucking sport is so damn confusing!
Spell it derby, pronounced darby.
Ah…like “food” is pronounced “Spotted Dick”….
Blood sausage really is delicious, although I also love haggis.
Uplifting and happy, part deux:
Since I’m in such a bright, sunshiny mood this morning, pre-game entertainment:
Tim Howard signs with Colorado Rapids.
Sorry Hippo.
No, this was GOOD. He had worn out his welcome at Everton, and was no longer a Premiership caliber keeper. Sadly, his World Cup performance was a “one off” peak and it was ALL rapidly downhill afterwards.
Oh…..well “Yay Hippo” then instead.
/totally not embarrassed by my futbol stupiditeddiness.
At least he’s back in America.
yeah, he got divorced and his kids were back in the US. This had been super hard on him.