Awaking From the Basketball Coma (Sunday No-Funday Preview)

The last day of the coma is always such a bummer, because all I can think about is how close to being over it is, and the looming specter of fucking Monday. Also FUCK YESTERDAY.

7S Iowa vs. 2S Villanova (12:10, CBS)

The ultimate acid test in “just how cursed is Jay Wright?” Iowa did everything in its power to choke away its 1st round game, yet somehow beat Temple on an OT buzzer-beating tip-in. Still, they give the impression of being held together with duct tape and chicken wire at the moment.

14E Stephen F. Austin vs. 6E Notre Dame (2:40, CBS)

Not exactly the matchup the suits expected when this game was allotted an exclusive national slot, I’m guessing. The Irish are pretty consistent offensively, so I doubt the cards are there for SFA to beat the house again and crash the Sweet Sixteen party. They still have the tourney’s best beard, though…

10W VCU vs. 2W Oklahoma (5:10, CBS)

These aren’t the Rams of yesteryear, Boomer Sooner should roll in this one. Iowa State has already slain its early round demons, so perhaps Lon Kruger gets to do the same. Would love to see both squadrons in the Final Four.

15MW Middle Tennessee vs. 10MW Syracuse (6:10, TNT)

Jim Boeheim’s briliant “win one for Scotchy!” motivational campaign is paying off, even working reverse mojo on Sparty. I have no idea if the Blue Raiders will even get off the bus for this one, coming off the immense sugar high of Friday’s fun.

13S Hawaii vs. 5S Maryland (7:10, TBS)

I have been wrong in all of my similar pronouncements…but I think this will be a very fun game to watch for the neutral viewer. The Rainbow Warriors could give the Turtle significant trouble, but a veteran team won’t fold as easily as Cal did.

11W Northern Iowa vs. 3W Texas A&M (7:40, truTV)

For two more hours tonight, truTV gets to be a thing again! Hashtag, suckmyass.

7E Wisconsin vs. 2E Xavier (8:40, TNT)

Unleash your inner Catler, everybody. DOOOOOOONNNNNNN’T CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRE

8W St. Joe’s vs. 1W Oregon (9:40, TBS)

Will I DVR this, just in case Toddler Blood Martelli pulls it off? MAYBE.

0 0 votes
Article Rating
King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
Subscribe
Notify of
550 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
The Maestro

UNI screwed the pooch so bad in that last minute there that a Welshman looked up from his sheep to say they were going a bit overboard on the poor thing.

theeWeeBabySeamus

21.1 secs left, aTm could still win by double digits.

litre_cola

Ass to mouth never wins.

Gratliff

Wow. NIU going ham

ssi_bulldawg

This game is bonkers

litre_cola

I just thought that same thing. Do you also think peanut butter spread on chocolate cookies is a good idea?

ssi_bulldawg

Yes. Please bring me some

BrettFavresColonoscopy

THIS GAME WILL REMAIN TIED THROUGH THREE OVERTIMES AND TWO MAN SACK RACES WILL BE HELD ON CONSECUTIVE SUNDAYS UNTIL A CHAMPION CAN BE CROWNED

WCS

And UNI will have a 12-meter lead with 30 feet to go, and trip over over themselves four times to lose.

Redshirt

I just saw the replay. His brain went bye-bye there.

Gratliff

Seems I made a mistake turning off Northern Iowa-Texas A&M early

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hey, at least UNI was able to the ball to their side of the court that time.
Nice job, boys.
Maybe next time take a shot before the play clock expires though.

Redshirt

So here I am filling out a loan application trying to add $6K and 1 or 2 years onto a car loan to pay for a surgery when on my TV is a show called “Life or Debt” where a couple not paying their mortgage for 19 months while keeping a freaking Range Rover (that they pay $1K a month for). The man convinces them to sell the Range Rover and they treating it like they just pulled the plug on their first child.

Trump is partially right. America is already great. Americans kinda suck though.

Redshirt

I dunno. They’re black, but Trump does say he’s a big friend of them. He just wants to return to the good old days when they can perform chores for land owners while they are fed and sheltered.

theeWeeBabySeamus

That was a collapse befitting the late Herb Sendek
(I know he’s technically alive, but he’s been dead to me going on 2 decades)

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

BrettFavresColonoscopy

And who the fuck is operating the game clock, Andy Reid?

Senor Weaselo

What the shit?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Wow, and he almost Chris Webber’d that

theeWeeBabySeamus

Jeebus UNI. I mean, WTF?

litre_cola

Holy shit. that just happened

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Remember, these guys come from a state that also backed Ted Cruz for President. They can fuck up ANYTHING.

theeWeeBabySeamus

UNI sphincter tightness: Maximum Capacity

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

I’ve wondered why there hasn’t been a 16 over 1 upset ever in the tournament, but they always tend to be poor teams relative to the NCAA at large.

Using Pomeroy’s rankings for 16 seeds since 2014 (there are 351 D-I teams):
2014: 250, 213, 188, 179, 177, 173
2015: 239, 195, 176, 151, 139, 134
2016: 270, 267, 231, 228, 205, 160

These auto-bids can be pretty goddamned terrible.

Here’s the full 2016 rankings: http://kenpom.com/index.php

Senor Weaselo

Yeah, the gap between 15 and 16 is fairly sizeable.

litre_cola

But how have the couple of handfuls of 15’s undone 2’s way more?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Wow, A&M happy to not take the openings they’re being presented. Reminds me of high school.

litre_cola

I am 39, ten years older than the soon to be Mrs. Cola, got a little stoned and am listening to the Stone Roses while watching hoops (don’t judge) she rolls out and listens and immediately asks if I got into her brothers weed banana bread. Check. Mate.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Inorite?

litre_cola

Honestly a size of a fucking ritz cracker and you are ultra stoned.

theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

Oh Sam Elliott….how could you?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

I guess this is serious Buddy but so be it.

When you have nasty bouts of depression (in my case Bipolar II) there are little victories that can bring you back to stability. Today I cleaned my workspace and room and not only felt a sense of minute accomplishment, but it keeps the mind uncluttered.

Also, I finally have optimized my computer and technology to make my life easier and more secure. Two-step verification for your important things is a must have in my book. Not to mention technology can really mess with my head when I don’t use it mindfully, as evidenced by my sitting comatose at the computer for nearly four hours straight yesterday. No bueno.

Finally, I stopped filling out brackets about four years ago. I don’t enjoy it at all.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Good for you. Seriously, those “little” victories are huge on days that suck.

litre_cola

Buddy, all the best. I also suffer from depression, mostly in complete silence, the smile people see does NOT represent where I am at. In the last however many years wit the site that shall not be named and here, I feel this group of imaginary internet friends always has each others backs. We are a fantastic sounding board for certain.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Evening, gents and lady or ladies. I’m having my first ever VERY disappointing airbnb experience (as opposed to previous fair to excellent airbnb experiences). Among the many problems, they don’t have ANY of the TBS/TNT/TruTV channels in their package. So I’m watching this UNI game on the interwebz. Go Northwestern!

litre_cola

So NIU is going to beat on the state of Texas? Longhorns, Aggies, Baylor Jesus’ gone, Syracuse still in? I like how this has played out thus far.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yeah, UNI is gonna blow this game like a fat Iowa chick at closing time.

litre_cola

Hippo, you got your super bowl, I will never get one, why ya gotta harsh my scotch buzz?

Sill Bimmons

Please list the things you find in this photo that differ from your daily norms:

http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s–Ldj_mx6U–/c_scale,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800/17x9o2btpwmntjpg.jpg

JustStopDude

Fuck people actual drive without an open beer?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Spanky Datass

My pet lion has much darker mane.

WCS

I drive with a cheetah in the passenger seat, not a lion.

litre_cola

That is because you are posh WCS.

scotchnaut

As far as big cats are concerned, I prefer to commute with leopards.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

All my wild animal passengers wear a helmet in the sidecar

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

You guys are all wrong, the correct animal to ride in your sidecar

http://i.imgur.com/ncg4t3z.gif

JustStopDude
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
JustStopDude

I seriously hated living and working in the middle east.

Stupid shit like this all around. The citizens have more money than common sense…

Senor Weaselo

So Madre Weaselo wanted to watch Tyler Perry’s The Passion. And I’ve gotta say…
https://vimeo.com/44050826

Senor Weaselo

In hindsight, does that count as NSFW?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

They’ve done a duet between Jesus and Judas of Imagine Dragons’ Demons and now Seal is singing Mad World. We’re still rooting for Kiss From a Rose.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

All I need is Michael J. Nelson.

Senor Weaselo

That didn’t come out right.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ITe5sAUcb4o

Sill Bimmons
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

Horatio Cornblower

2/10, passed up the Lagunitas Sucks, would not bang

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Waaaaaaaaaaaaait…… door still open……

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Never mind; she didn’t bring her wallet.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
theeWeeBabySeamus

Me after leaving DFO clubhouse to take a leak and finding the door locked upon my return (Guys? GUYS? NOT FUNNY)
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2LIq3gzMJMo/VgTfUo8ekBI/AAAAAAAASJg/BC10o85XT0U/s1600/gif%2Bbitacoras.gif

WCS

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hahahahaha.

Sill Bimmons

Did you know that we’re supposed to look on Idiocracy as a call to eugenics instead of a stupid fucking comedy?

theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

Sill Bimmons

Not entirely sure how to take that…

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view/934651/ow-my-balls-o.gif

JustStopDude

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
JustStopDude

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

Asian driver?

theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

JustStopDude

comment image

I wonder what makes it “Manhattan Style”…

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I have 4 minutes to decide between TWD live w/ commercials or the WI game that is going to be terrible. I am leaning towards anything but those 2 options

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yeah, I decided about a half hour ago to stick with shitty basketball and skip commercials on the dvr delay for TWD.

ssi_bulldawg

Curling is on.

litre_cola

THIS TRU TV, I CALL IT THE ARIZONA COYOTES BECAUSE NO ONE WATCHES AND NO ONE CARES.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I have it on my “favorites” list, but never stop or record from it. I should just unclutter.

Sill Bimmons
theeWeeBabySeamus

Before Hawaii goes ahead and gets kilt off here, I need to make the obligatory “I hope the terps fall off of Mt. Wanahokaloogi” joke.
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view5/2603796/shark-bait-hoo-ha-ha-o.gif
/fuck you, that’s funny
//yay Nemo

theeWeeBabySeamus

Congrats Hawaii…you waited 2 possessions too long to call TO.
smgdh

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh