Oh, this is an unflavored ice milk kind of tournament, no doubt. So without further ado…your first set of Flacco Eight matchups.
2W Oklahoma vs. 1W Oregon (6:09, CBS)
Nothing but chalk here. Hopefully, that streak breaks with the mildest of seeding upsets, because I will quit watching this shitshow the instant Boomer Sooner loses. I mildly dislike (Nova) to detest (U*NC) every other team remaining, and I have no intention of listening to Jim Nantz jerk them all off next weekend.
2S Villanova vs. 1S Kansas (8:49, CBS)
Definitely an old-school Johnny Reb classic in this geographically correct regional final here! Nova has been white hot all tourney long, so it would make sense for them to hit a brick wall here and lose by 40. Fuck Kansas, same boring-assed team every goddamned year.
How is that Arizona’s uniform is somehow progressively worse every year? Are they trying to top the PHX Suns jersey?
Yes.
Of course Nova can’t get the roll.
bullshit call
Yup.
Villanova is gonna blow this, aren’t they?
FLYERA SOON. Jesus christ, how long is this pregame?
Are we sure this isn’t the UVA/Cuse game??
No…no, we are not.
Goddamnit, Nova. Have you not been mildly pressed all season??
Pound me, Dawg….
http://www.ampthemag.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/giphy-5.gif
So apparently there’s twizzler easter basket grass now, and that shit just sticks together, making it woefully ineffective as a substitute for plastic carpet decoration.
THAT’S HOW YOU GET ANTS
And now it looks like some kind of sweet tooth tentacle porn. Hm.
The reason I latched on to Cuse was because back in the early 80’s NBC had college basketball and it was a steady diet of UCLA, UNC, Marquette, Ohio State, Indiana, Notre Dame, Louisville (Denny Crum era), Michigan and Kentucky beating up on teams. They almost always blew out whomever they were playing and despite the fact that I loved basketball, this was boring as hell.
Then I started getting something called “Big East” games. They were fucking intense. They “let the players play”. There were no pre-established favourites. It was a god damn free-for-all. For some reason I took an instant dislike to Georgetown and I liked the way Cuse played. They had a number of guys that could ‘fly’ (loved to dunk-early 80’s, remember) and they were maddeningly inconsistent.
That’s my story…
I miss the shit out of the Big East.
That were a good 30 for 30, one of my 3-5 faves
It was nuts in the 80s, Seton Hall used to play on campus in a tiny ass arena, and Patrick Ewing got racially abused up and down the East Coast!
Oh yeah! I remember watching that from my living room in North Cakalaky and going “gee, that’s kinda racialist, ain’t it?”
Although “Ewing is an Ape” gives some room for nuance, no?
SEND IT IN JEROME
Bad officiating in a game involving Boston? The hell you say?
Bah. Every NHL team I wanted to lose today won, and I actually sat through that shit. Since the Flyers are apparently trying to line their game up with midnight mass, I’m not sure if I”ll get to watch the one game I want to.
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lv1fdwaHg01qzthxgo2_500.gif
The Gospel according to Gene Hart
NUT UP AND GO LOKO YOU PANSY
http://www.drugfree.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/Four_loko_3-26-141.jpg
Now, Radley Balko’s blog is a must read regardless, but Mike Nifong is still an asshole who shouldn’t be anywhere near a courtroom ever again. For those curious, this is the case they allude to at the end of the Duke lacrosse 30 for 30.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-watch/wp/2014/03/20/darryl-howard-and-the-rampaging-prosecutor-durham-learns-little-from-duke-lacrosse-debacle/
Ice Giants beat the Ice Alouettes 5-2.
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lv1fdwaHg01qzthxgo2_500.gif
this is a much shittier game than #1, both sides could use a Buddy
You’re goddamned right!
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-KVEnP9DL7F8/TbxdxaRZjnI/AAAAAAAAG2k/sHxBXx-GGyI/s1600/1st%2BRule%2BOF%2BBuddy%2BSystem.jpg
Ah, twitter. You always cultivate the best content.
Good googly moogly….would ya look at those, that, her, it….Awwww fuck. Jusk, look.
Excuse me, miss?
For your butthole…
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/81DlosCueCL._SL1500_.jpg
Jay Wright seems generally like an ok dude, I guess. He’s no Bill Fuckface Self.
…Why are they playing Sweet Caroline in Toronto?
Also, Edmonton is just a vortex of hockey suck. Over nine million tied up in Andrej Sekera and Mark Fayne!
Blech.
“Fayne, Fayne, Fayne, Fayne, Fayne, Fayne, Fayne, Fayne, Fayne, Fayne, Fayne, Fayne, Fayne…what’s your name?”
-David Bowie
Honest question-what is with the Cuse hate? Is it all focused on the coach that is caught picking his nose 5 times every year? I’m genuinely curious.
New York is overrun with them and because the Northeast doesn’t really go crazy for college sports, we hate anyone who enjoys their college teams too much if they don’t go there. It’s their de facto pro basketball, similar to everyone in middle PA getting a hardon for anything Penn State athletics.
Hell, not just middle PA. Lived in Scr/WB area for two years and was ready to murder every living soul in a 50 mile radius for the daily PSU bullshit. Sadly I left before the “bad touch” story broke. That woulda been so damned fun to experience there.
Yeah, I was living in Charlottesville, VA when that happened. The Joepashipping isn’t as bad in Yinzburgh, but, there are some. Would’ve been funny to watch them meltdown.
For me, ‘Cuse is in that middle tier….along with UVa and some others….no genuine hatred for the program, but enough of the fans are huge douchenozzles that it’s also impossible to have any genuine affinity.
Present company excluded, of course.
same, though Boeheim seems kind of dickish. I go back and forth as to whether he’s a semi-likable crumudgeon or not. And I generally don’t enjoy watching them play.
WVU and Syracuse have a long historical rivalry.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Syracuse%E2%80%93West_Virginia_football_rivalry
The Orange can suck on a severed dick.
Wasn’t there an obnoxious KSKer who was a big ‘Cuse fan?
Son of a St. John’s alum.
Watching the Duke Lacrosse 30 for 30, remembering what a fucking maniac Mike Nifong was.
You spelled “Nancy Grace” wrong.
Hahahahah….that was funny.
Mike Nifong is an absolute piece of shit.
http://www.wral.com/innocence-project-co-founder-calls-for-audit-of-mike-nifong-s-prosecutions/13805843/
http://www.innocenceproject.org/news-events-exonerations/2014/new-dna-and-previously-undisclosed-evidence-points-to-innocence-of-north-carolina-man-serving-80-years-for-double-homicide-and-arson
They want to look at all of his convictions now.
Ugh, as someone from NJ/Philly/NYC I have so much hate for Villanova. Fuck them.
For me it goes Cuse, then UConn, then giant chasm, then Nova, then other giant chasm.
Syracuse is annoying as shit too. It’s like pro sports for upstate NY.
Oh and fuck Boston College forever for bailing on the Big East and being slingshotted into irrelevancy in all ACC sports.
1a U*NC
1b UMd
2 ECU (don’t ask…it’s a whole “my rednecks are better than your rednecks” thing)
3 Duke, UK, KU, and a lot of others I know I’m forgetting.
1a) U*NC
1b) Duke basketball/ND football
1c) EZU football
GIANT CHASM
Kansas (football only), UVA, Texas, Oregon, numerous others
Historically I have had a simmering ‘Nova hate. But knocking them out last year as a 1 seed has temporarily satiated said hate. Piccolo girl’s tears fed my dark heart nicely.
Nova gets a pass solely for Brian Westbrook
Now if Mr. Hield wants to celebrate tonight like a true Buddy, there will be lots of Cerveza and tiny Spanish men bringing stepladders to glory holes around Anaheim!
http://gifsec.com/wp-content/uploads/GIF/2014/03/fabulous-reaction-gif.gif
Dammit!!!!!! Let’s try that again….
Hello bitches.
Buddy, you missed the Buddy show!
I was too busy working on an awful “Northern Iowa’s glad it had the second-worst blowup last week” joke.
Oh.
Hello, Swallowtail (giggity)…
http://pre15.deviantart.net/f149/th/pre/f/2016/084/3/3/swallowtail_by_wufpacker-d9wfgvl.jpg
Goddammit….I TOOK THIS PHOTO!!!!! SOMEBODY LIKE IT BEFORE I START CRYING!!!!!
Not sure why I bother anymore, but just checked the leaderboard. With the Okie win I’m again approaching the 50th percentile…wooooo!!!! (when two of your final four picks go down the first weekend, including your Nat’l Champ in the first round, it’s difficult to recover….Sparty, you still disgust me).
Hey, I still got a team in the Final Four right!
http://cdn.meme.am/instances/57950660.jpg
I’ll have two if KU doesn’t screw the pooch. But I kinda also hate KU, so I won’t be too disappointed if the canine gets pegged.
This is about how I’m feeling. Go carnage!
Big sweaty man-boys got excited and ran Allie off. Whut’s wrong wit dey? Dumb man-boys.
Oh wow. Look at Toronto not sucking a dick when I need a Boston loss.
This tournament just got less evil.
Just wanted to stop in and wish everyone a Happy Sweatshop U. Schadenfreude Day!
Man, that’s gonna be a ROUGH double shift for those 8-year olds in Scezhuan Province tomorrow though ,, smh
Mr Knight, may I use the bathroom?
SEW UNTIL YOUR FINGERS BLEED YA LITTLE BASTARD!!!!
I’ve said it once, and I will say it again…Lon Kruger’s Sooners are the best-coached team I’ve seen in the tournament. Unflappable.
Watching CNN’s “Road to the White House”, they’re doing Bush-Dukakis now. Its almost like a comedy of errors with Dukakis seeing him go from cakewalk to the White House to getting blown away.
These Cosmopolitan of Vegas commercials don’t make me want to stay there, as much as burn it to the ground, and piss on the ashes.
Really, the only good part is the sportsbook, and that’s only because I’m a degenerate.
Going out to dinner, so let me know if Nova upsets Kansas.
SPOILER
no
The words “rented” and “mule” come to mind.
But anything can happen.
http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/athfwiki/images/c/c7/Iamapod.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20120122043041
What’s up?
Buddy Hield’s self-esteem?
Yeah, that kid doesn’t suck at teh baksetballzing.
HOLY FUCKBALLS, he’s left the announcers speechless
If only that were literally true, eh?
(I have sound off so maybe it is? Please advise.)
partially!
So I paid $85 to go to the doctor to be told that I have a virus and to buy three OTC drugs, but I’m going to have to suffer through a bad sore throat and a cough.
But because of Obamacare, my actual insurance doesn’t kick in because my deductible hasn’t kicked in. I just paid a $85 dollars for a doctor to say, “We have no medicine that will get rid of that. Here’s some stuff that will treat it two to four hours at a time. Enjoy the ride.”
This is why I’m a Republican (I just want to say that phrase until Trump or Cruz wins, and I quit being one).
You are a Commentist…and you didn’t ask for Tussionex BY NAME??
FOAR SHAME
Yeah, I fucked up there. If its any consolation, I will be giving some vicodin with my dental surgery so I will most likely be spending several days in a hydrocodine induced coma.
The winner of Obamacare was the insurance companies; you got treated and they didn’t have to pay anything. You will be less likely to have a more expensive visit in the future (even though its a virus and mostly untreatable) and they didn’t have to pay anything. BOTH party’s beholdenness to big money led to the Obamacare compromise. (If it had been called Romneycare would we even be talking about it?)
Yeah, but I have to pay $1,300 before it kicks in. That’s like going out on a date, taking her to dinner, the movies, the theatre, her parents, her high school reunion, and helping her move her stuff, and THEN you get some second base action.
See below. My employer-based policy deductible is $3500. Because I chose the “cadillac” plan. Otherwise it would be $5000.
Unless one gets on the “single payer” government insurance train, that’s the way the marketplace is headed.
Yeah I know. You’d think it could be something simple, like since you already paid monthly installments without using it, you helped other people pay for their medical needs. Since you need it, you pay 20% of the cost and everyone else helps pay for the rest through the insurance. If you spend more, say $2,000, you pay a higher percentage because you are spending more than the other share. After that you still have the Out-of-Pocket Maximum to protect you if something bad happens.
There, I fixed the Health Care System. Now someone tell the Democrats, Republicans and Trump to shut the fuck up!
To me, that restriction is the direct result of a compromise obama had to make to get anything passed at all; that is, you should be maddest at republican tea party fuckwit traitors for resisting health care, madder at limp dick democrats for caving, and mad at everyone else in the country for having the attention span of an atom of Lawrencium.
http://www.uta.edu/faculty/story/2311/Misc/2013,2,26,MedicalCostsDemandAndGreed.pdf
RE: Tea Party Republicans
Also, if you work for a medium size employer (like a law firm), this is likely the kind of insurance you’ve had for the past 5+ years. I know that’s true for me. It’s basically a “negotiated rate” discount card until October, and that’s only if you are full of ailments like me and use it a lot.
Most of what we pay for when we buy “health care” isn’t actual medical treatment. People blame some sort of ‘inefficiency’ bugaboo for rising health care costs, but while the system is certainly not as efficient as it could be, it’s not the sole explanation for higher costs. For the most part, the medical community is giving people what they want. We want fancy hospital facilities, personalized care, and to extend our lifespans way past our healthspans, and we don’t want to pay for any of that. We could absolutely provide cheap, efficient health care, but that’s not really what people want. They don’t want long waits, open hospital wards for non-infectious diseases, a doctor who doesn’t make small talk, medications that are effective but have annoying side effects, or a slightly higher uncertainty in diagnosis that you get with fewer expensive tests. Hell, I hardly ever go to the doctor and I don’t want that stuff either. Health care is way more than just medicine, we’re purchasing a fully featured service.
I CAME HERE TO WATCH BASKETBALL AND GET DRUNK AND BY THE JESUS, I WILL DO SO!
Evening friends, Romans, countrymen.
Cartago Delenda Est
I’m a countryfuck, thank you very much.
Buddy Hield is awesome. I’m down with rooting for Oklahoma for the rest of this tourney.
Much like his defenders on the court, I’m behind him as well.
My phone keeps alerting me when Bob Kravitz has opinions. NO1CURR
who that??
Indy’s equivalent to Bill Simmons. Broke the Deflategate story.
WHEW, not just the early onset Alzheimers paranoia for me again.
Since when do you only get 4 timeouts in basketball? Has anyone told… that one guy from michigan who tried to call a timeout?
New rule this season, along with a 30-second shot clock.
Thank God (for his own sake) Pete Gillen isn’t still in coaching…
I guess that’s what happens when you dont watch games all year…
Okies really exploiting Oregon’s rank stupidity so far.
I expected Boomer to win. I did not expect Boomer to roll Eugene like a….well, like a dead duck.
Huh, I forgot how boring the first 95% of a basketball game is.
So I wonder if the Red Wings just want to see what it’s like to golf in April.
The second and third weeks of April, at least.
It’s still like watching flies fuck (h/t Carlin, George). Just less humid.
Buddy WOO
Are the West Coast crawling DFOers still participating in the open thread? Because that’s exactly how I picture every bar in LA, patrons buried in their screens.
I am but I’m the first one here. Covalent is on her way and I’m sure the rest of the gang will be here shortly.
Are those two guys on the left kissing or is it photoshopped? That arm looks like it’s coming from the grassy knoll.
First one at the bar.
I Ubered over and traffic was easy.
Less than 15 bucks from El Segundo.
Let’s drink things!
I’m stuck in the OC. With family. Sober. Please have a great time, and have several for me.