Landing like a wet turd yesterday was the announcement that Atlanta (2019), Miami (2020) and LA (2021) would host Super Bowls LIII, LIV & LV respectively. Lord knows each town has the available hookers & drug supply to handle the job. I’m sure the new Atlanta SphincterBowl and LA’s KroenkeWorld will be sheer palaces of excess that’ll make JerryWorld look like garbage. I’m sure South Beach can compensate for Miami’s other shortcomings.

However, looking at this list, I feel fairly confident we will again fail to have a home team playing in their town’s Super Bowl before 2022.

Arguments have been raised that the game should no longer be at a “neutral site”, but at the stadium of the team with the best record. That’s ridiculous, because what town could possibly prepare for a 80,000 person convention in two weeks? Taking a practical look, let’s use Green Bay.

I’ve been to Lambeau Field:

• Milwaukee’s General Mitchell airport (MKE) couldn’t handle the traffic surge, and O’Hare is 2.5 hours away
• the interstate up to Green Bay is a two-hour drive under the best conditions. It’s a state highway from both Madison & Minnesota.
• guaranteed sellouts means there hasn’t been enough tourist infrastructure built up in the Green Bay area to accommodate the sudden influx.
  • unless you pay the premium, most hotels are in Appleton, 30 minutes away.
• they’d have to deputize the National Guard in order to provide enough security.
• “This is Peter King live at Brett Favre’s Steakhouse…”
• February 5th in Green Bay.

Which raises an interesting point: why not a pure neutral-site Super Bowl? Maybe not all the time; how about once every 5 years? Put it in a city that has no NFL ties. Rog has such a hard-on for the international market – let London or Mexico City host in 2022. (Providing, of course, God-Emperor Trump allows international travel.) Or, to accommodate the “AMERICA FIRST!!1!1” crowd, pick cities that don’t have an NFL team. They’ve punished Hawaii with enough Pro Bowls, let them have a real game for once. Why should Columbus or Tuscaloosa lose out, simply because they don’t have an NFL team; thanks to university “donations” and tax laws, those stadiums are better suited for the big game than Jacksonville or San Diego. They’ve held the game at Stanford and the Rose Bowl, so why not The Big House?

Or, they could just accept being the whores that they are, and do what’s right: Las Vegas. It’s got the infrastructure, if not the stadium. But what billionaire and mayor wouldn’t make that happen as part of “developing” the UNLV campus, especially if there were a shot at Super Bowl LVI? Hell – they gave LA #55 and that stadium is still a tract of dirt in Inglewood. The Vegas mob is surely easier to negotiate with than the 111th Street Crips. And I’m sure the “gambling issue” – if not acknowledged – can be easily papered over with donations and misdirection.

Speaking of Vegas, it looks like Rog is still intent on making Oakland beg. He wants to keep them in Oakland, methinks because the League would collect more in expansion fees than they would via relocation. He won’t come out and say that, of course, so he hides behind the usual bailiwick of gambling. But it seems Kraft and Jerrah have come around on the deal, which is shocking given their A-1 stances on moral issues.

I point this out because someone at sports aggravator Bleacher Report asked Mark Cuban about the costs of NFL expansion. Cuban said that the fees would range into “the billions”. The League gets relative peanuts if Mark Davis moves the team. Failing to land that whale could be the only thing that would bring down Rog.

Oh god – it sounds like “X-Men: Apocalypse” is just awful. Worse than Batman V Superman; possibly worse than even X-Men: The Last Stand. I’m still going to go, because I’m admittedly in the bag for comic book movies, but I dislike hate-watching movies. “So bad it’s good” I can deal with, but simply bad might be a cry for help.

I wonder who Aaron Rodgers favourite character is?

Finally, loogit this horseshit:

I believe we’ve reached peak OHMYGODWHATTHEFUCKISTHISBULLSHIT?!?!WHENDOESTHESEASONSTART?!?!

Tonight’s Playoff Contests:

• NHL: Blues @ Sharks – 9:00 – ELIMINATION GAME
  • Game 6 (Sharks up 3-2)
• NBA: Toronto @ Cleveland – 8:30
  • Game 5 (Series tied 2-2)

There was only one redeeming aspect to the last Miami Super Bowl.

NO ONE DENIES THIS!