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Sill Bimmons

In case you were wondering, this is what 60 lbs of cereal marshmallows looks like:

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Are you saying….just the marshmallows?
THAT’S THE DREAM!!!!!!

Sill Bimmons

It’s the pure shit man.

Spanky Datass

Dirt Cowboys get a safety in both the 8th and 9th quarters to send TBFIB home sad.
http://i.makeagif.com/media/12-08-2015/coi_ZE.gif

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

FAT GUY BIRDIE TO TAKE THE LEAD AT THE U.S. OPEN! FAT GUY BIRDIE TO TAKE THE LEAD AT THE U.S. OPEN!

Fronkenshteen

Lowry?

Brick Meathook

Heinz Field, June 2014
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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

How many times have I asked you not to post pictures of me?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Gonna go out on a limb here and say that this was NOT the day WCS managed to knock up his better half.

Sill Bimmons

Just saw the “highlights” of BEL/ROI.

I haven’t seen a bunch of Irishmen take a beating like that since 1924.

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Wakezilla

It’s fitting Ronaldo and Lebron became famous at the same time because both are all-timers who get shit on non-stop by the internet. I cannot believe Ronaldo hasn’t score a goal this tournament.

Hungary: 4pts
Iceland: 2 pts
Portugal: 2 pts
Austria: 1pt

C’mon tie game between Iceland v Austira!

King Hippo

I’d be pretty surprised if 4 points and 3rd place didn’t punch one’s ticket. Only 2 3rds won’t make it.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Well Lebron is just unlikable. Ronaldo just chooses to have the most punchable white dickbag haircut so you accidentally hate him

Sill Bimmons

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I just got scolded for napping for like 40 minutes and not mowing the lawn fast enough from a guy that slept in til 1 pm and cant mow the lawn himself because if he tried he would probably die

Wakezilla

As someone who wants Hungary to make it to the playoffs, the fact Portugal needs to win their 3rd match scares the ever loving shit out of me. Especially since Ronaldo seems ready to scorekakke all over the Euros.

King Hippo

NO SOUP FOAR YOU!!!!!

Sill Bimmons

oh wow

Wakezilla

Stupid DFO working really slow! I called his miss, damnit!

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King Hippo

Ian Darke is going down to the locker room after the match to personally piss on Ronaldo’s foot.

Sill Bimmons

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Wakezilla

If DFO wasn’t loading so slow, I was going to say that Ronaldo has a tendency to miss PKs

Hahahahahahhahahahahajahahahahahahahaha

King Hippo

HOLY FUCKBALLS

Sill Bimmons

Whole lot of nothing.

Wakezilla

I can only assume Peta is behind this meme that just popped up all over my facebook feed:

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Wakezilla

Taek so strong, the internet can’t handle it anymore, I guess.

http://img.pandawhale.com/83098-Melanie-Iglesias-hot-shorts-se-5uwV.gif

Wakezilla

That foul clearly shows Christian not giving a Fuchs.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

So I guess I’m going to spend my afternoon drinking rum and lamenting the fact that a new shoulder issue is going to bring all the weightlifting gains I’ve made lately to a screeching halt.

Leg work here I come!

Wakezilla

I don’t know his name, but, the athletic-ish looking fellow with the neck tattoo is totally the one to blame for Portugal’s struggles. That just screams me first glory boy who won’t give Ronaldo the ball.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Allagash only has one beer at this event, and it’s their Saison

This is the point where Peter King berates the volunteer and leaves in a huff.

Sill Bimmons

Footballers I hate more than Cristiano Ronaldo:

John Terry

That is all.

Wakezilla

But one of my previews said he was a changed man! . . . The other said he wasn’t.

I might be Maple Peter King.

Sill Bimmons

How is the syrup quality on Rail Canada?

Wakezilla

Oh it’s excellent. Of course, they also serve the syrup PK would totally order, Aunt Jemima.

But at least nobody has ever been arrested for praying on those tracks!

Wakezilla

Shit, this is pretty cool: Hungary fans taking over Marseille

https://twitter.com/NBCSportsSoccer/status/744191601472339969

Sill Bimmons

HIDE THE SALAMI

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“The most important thing is to hit fairways and greens; I’ve been saying that all week and I’ll keep saying it, cause that’s the most important thing.”

– Bryson DeChambreau

Sill Bimmons

Dogwhistle: LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE YOU JACKALS

Wakezilla

Billy Bob: Teaching Older Millenials at a young age the importance of

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Wakezilla

. . . and telling your favorite stripper what you thought of her performance

http://i.makeagif.com/media/8-02-2015/PHcfmP.mp4

laserguru

Gather around kids, I’ve got a story to tell!

I just got home from visiting the orthopedic surgeon and I am happy to report that after just 5 weeks post surgery I have been declared fit and I am ready to be released back into the wild.
Woo!

When talking to the doctor I told him “In just a few weeks the newly repaired left knee is already light years ahead of the right one.”

He said “What’s up with the right knee?”

/pause

“I had it repaired last year and it never really got that much better.”

He says “How about we take a look at it?”

I mentioned cost concerns and the fact that I paid (or am still paying) about 15 grand out of pocket for last years surgery and he said “Really? What did we charge you as a deductible? About 500? That’s the only bill you will receive from me for that surgery. I do plenty of business and I’m not going to do that to somebody. Tell you what, how about we bypass the doctors and the process? I have an MRI machine in Anaheim if you can get there (I can) and we can take a look at your right knee with no out of pocket to you.”

I’m amazed at this point and I say “OK?” We walk to the reception desk he has the nurse set an appointment and he told her “Make sure you indicate Insurance only, no co-pay.”

This guy is the greatest fucking doctor ever!

And I have an appointment for an MRI in Anaheim on Tuesday morning.

If he can get righty back to the state that my newly repaired left knee is I will be fucking ecstatic.

Holy shit, my head is spinning.

Sill Bimmons

Most docs will cut you some slack if they know it’s hitting you financially, but that guy’s giving away the store!

Spanky Datass

Doctors that see patients on Saturday and don’t charge triple?!?! California is a strange and magical place …

Good news on the knee(s)!

Wakezilla

Congrats on your health and your amazing string of good fortune!

Sill Bimmons

That one guy on Portugal looks like Landon Donovan with hair.

I haven’t seen Austrians this uncoordinated since the Ulm campaign.

Sill Bimmons

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theeWeeBabySeamus
Sill Bimmons

hngh

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Sill Bimmons

Ian Darke is so frustrated he’s actually mad at Portugal right now.

Sill Bimmons

This is a masterclass on how not to play football.

Wakezilla

tWBS’ Alice Eve’s post just reminded me of Ali Larter, who was in Varsity Blues, which reminds me:

RIP Ron Lester, AKA: Billy Bob from Varsity Blues.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Sorry to hear that.

theeWeeBabySeamus
Fronkenshteen

I can spot two particular reasons…

Sill Bimmons

IT JUST ISN’T FAIR

Wakezilla

Good god. Ronaldo should have like 7 goals already in this tournament. Dude is snake bitten

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Sill Bimmons

hahaha ronaldo

Wakezilla

For Hungary’s sake, I’m hoping Portugal wins 3-0. That way Portugal has a great goal differential, meaning they can rest their top players and Hungary and Portugal can play to a boring 0-0 tie for the final match. Portugal would get first, Hungary likely gets second.

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Fronkenshteen

“I’ve got my hands cut out for me”?
Really?
Jesus Christ.

Wakezilla

Who said that?

Fronkenshteen

ESPN announcer opposite Ian Darke. Not sure of his name.

Wakezilla

A metaphor of what Cristiano Ronaldo is going to have to do today to ensure Portugal wins

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Wakezilla

Running dangerously low on booze. Gonna have to pace out last two beers before I have to briskly walk to beer store in pouring rain to buy more.

Canadia really needs to get on those awesome American liquor laws where you can buy booze at a convenient store.

Sill Bimmons

Not where I live.

Sill Bimmons

The best country for alcohol access is the UK.

By miles.

You can buy booze at the post office.

King Hippo

But I ain’t been to the post office in like 7 years. The ABC store is 2 minutes away. And it’s open the Jewish Sabbath, at least…

Sill Bimmons

Maui Jims are crap.

If you’re going to drop big money on a pair of sunglasses go with Oakley or Vuarnet.

I know most Oakleys are totally brotastic and awful but they are the best performing sun protection on the market and they do make a few styles for actual people.

http://ep.yimg.com/ay/yhst-67817687360191/oakley-oo4106-02-conductor-6-color-lead-polarized-8.gif

Spanky Datass

Nice! Wire nose-pieces are the only kind I can stand to wear.

Wakezilla

I bought a pair of Bolle sunglasses at Costco. They had all the important stuff that one needs to keep from having eye damage from the sun.

So far, I am happy with them and they’re pretty stylish.

Sill Bimmons

Bollés are also excellent and the only reason I didn’t mention them is because I forgot about them.

King Hippo

clip-ons or GTFO

King Hippo

everybody else be all jelly

Sill Bimmons
theeWeeBabySeamus

I can totally relate….
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Sill Bimmons

hey guys

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Spanky Datass

sup

Sill Bimmons

yo

got some rosette de lyon for later

Spanky Datass

mmmm pork

Wakezilla

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Wakezilla

In my Hungary preview, I made a reference that Hungary is the international lesser footy factory of sadness.

Hungary is currently in first place and has one game left. . . against Portugal, a team that could win this tournament and nobody would be surprised.

After this game, where Hungarians have their hopes up at an all-time high–or should I say since the 70s– that is a game where hearts will be ripe to be shattered.

Sill Bimmons

They need some intervention from beyond the grave.

http://static.goal.com/2934600/2934612_heroa.jpg

Wakezilla

A gypsy should start working on a spell that could transfer Puskas’ soccer talents to a striker on the current team. Sounds straight out of a movie, but, those gypsies have crazy mystical powers that you just don’t mess with

Wakezilla

I’m so happy Hungary tied. Had they lost, I’d have to get dressed, go downtown and find some Icelandic fans to beat up, as is tradition at the Euros.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Now you can stay home and beat yourself.
Win-win.

Wakezilla

Funny you should say that, 8.25 months pregnant wife went out to have lunch with a friend. . .

Wakezilla

In case we have any Arabs here, lemme explain what I mean by this:

When a European is upset with another, they like to beat each other up. It is considered an insult in European culture. Kind of like throwing a shoe at someone.

Sill Bimmons

That was oddly specific.

Wakezilla

Yeah, it was just a tongue in cheek jab at the media because someone in the Arab world threw their shoe at someone (again) and the media here was all like “in Arab culture, throwing your shoe at someone is considered an insult” which is just baffling that they felt they had to explain that.

Sill Bimmons

I see.

I hadn’t heard about any recent incidents.

Fronkenshteen
theeWeeBabySeamus

Sweatpants seems overly triumphant about that “stop”, considering he never touched the ball and it barely came near him. YES…MY REVERSE GRAVITATION CAUSED THAT CAROM TO GO WIDE RIGHT!!!!!!

Wakezilla

Did your feed not show him patting the ass of both players who blocked the shot and saying thanks?

theeWeeBabySeamus

It probably did.
I had stopped watching by then.

JustStopDude
King Hippo

wow, this has been a damned compelling group

Fronkenshteen

Iceland have a shot vs Austria?

King Hippo

definitely, I’d say

Wakezilla

Absolutely.

Iceland is a team who won’t win the tournament, but they’re a darkhorse to go on a run. For Hungary’s sake, I hope they shit the bed against Austria.

Wakezilla

Give that man who blocked that second shot Eve Angel for the MFing week!

Wooooooooo!