/Inside DFO Headquarters Monday Morning
Me: Guys, I’m at a loss here. The Bears and Eagles played just last night and now they’re playing again tonight! How do I spin this? How comes no one is talking about this?
Hippo: [shakes his goddamn head] What are you talking about?
Me: The game. Tonight. It’s the exact same tilt as last night.
OSZ: You screwed up.
Me:[rolls eyes] Thanks for the input, Oldie-but I’ve been doing this for over a year now. I think I’ve got a handle on it. Seriously, any ideas? The NFL has sunk to a new low.
Horatio: Scotch, the Bears and Eagles didn’t play last night. Are you okay?
Me: What is with you guys? Just check last night’s preview post. It’s right there! They played!
Low Commander: Did you watch the game?
Me: Of course not! I’m wayyyyy too hammered by that time. Just like all you guys. Am I right? [raises hand looking for a high five] Nobody? What is wrong with you guys?
Everybody– YOU FUCKED UP!
Me: Ohhhh, I get it-this is some sort of, “Let’s pick on the Canadian guy” thing. They never give us a break, right Beer Guy?
BeerGuyRob: [looks the other way, whistles]
Me: Fine. Whatever. Not funny, guys. Not. Funny. I bet Magary never had to put up with this sort of lack of respect. I’m out of here. I’ll be back when I’m not taken for granted! [slams door of conference room/broom closet]
DTZM: Guh. Let’s take a vote-everyone that wants Scotchnaut barred, raise your hand.
Dok Zymm: Can I vote with both hands? It’s twice as many as one!
FIN
Enjoy the game [spits on ground] “Friends”.
Man, fuck Jordan Matthews.
Seriously, Gruden baitin’ hard to Wentz’s tape after the game, right?
“Ehh, the game is already” commercial pic
http://66.media.tumblr.com/97d97ad5543b43e032f3c145e850edf1/tumblr_my54n0TtJB1r3f768o1_500.jpg
“You gotta take care of the dook”
http://67.media.tumblr.com/1980a8c522c926a9c090476928d98256/tumblr_np8hueQwY51rx4ivwo1_400.gif
You’ve to appreciate a flexible pu…..
I CAN’T SAY IT!!!!!
Gruden knows from Wentz he came.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/2829380f48ebf28c5d6ab6856834db81/tumblr_ny52wxt3SX1rx4ivwo1_400.gif
Bears go to Taco Bell tomorrow?
If Wentz is looking for a cabin boy for a cruise on Lake Michigan after the game I’m sure Gruden will happily be his huckleberry.
Not enough liquor to make watching this team “fun”
NOW you fuckers pick up a first? Not on the last drive when you punted at Royal??? Fuck you eagles.
All right, I can’t stands no more. G’night all.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/a510f6fb65bfcd35259d0010bdcc5f62/tumblr_o917gtB3uW1ubfgh6o1_500.jpg
This team is an absolute shit show but Freeman and Trevaithan have been a pleasant suprise.
I used to be neutral on the future of the CornHunter.
Gruden has made me want him to die of teh HantaAIDS.
“THAT’S HOLDING! THAT’S FUCKING HOLDING”
– Another thing accidentally caught from fans that makes its way onto TV
Jesus Gruden is going to be chafed as fuck come morning time with all this Wentz masturbation.
He is raw and bleeding at this point. He won’t stop
Nothing is more intimidating than a midget running back in a circle of behemoths
“That’s fucking holding ref!”
I do enjoy the unedited swearing come through the on-field audio.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/febb9d8c28d00c5de1ab47d2a4922501/tumblr_ms1iwnbH0F1qb05aco1_250.gif
http://66.media.tumblr.com/d191a35453193dfbb3179efb1e1dbfe0/tumblr_ms1iwnbH0F1qb05aco5_250.gif
Just stay down you plucky Ursidae types. Just. Stay. Down.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-9HQNt86qJWU/UdPVahgRmSI/AAAAAAAAQqI/LAkSu7Vk9Mc/s576/adg6.gif
http://img.pandawhale.com/post-50107-fat-jay-cutler-SI-2014-cover-m-XMYQ.jpeg
LOOK AT WHAT YOUR ANTI GUN LAWS GET YOU CHICAGO
http://67.media.tumblr.com/26c59c106b29069e8c9dd08d3f8618f7/tumblr_nb1dowBRY31tzdu2xo1_500.gif
FUcking ace onside kick that was.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/c3b59a800be4e49cf8f57ffe7780d7a6/tumblr_mnf139iy4U1qe4o3oo1_500.gif
Looked good to me.
“Andy Reid’s fingerprints are on this hire.”
Yeah, because there’s barbecue sauce on his shirt.
Conor Barth = flaming garbage
Worst. Onside. Kick. EVAR
Im going to fucking lose on an extra point.
There are currently people drunkenly screaming “bear down” and explaining to a nearby child that the Bears are only two scores down so “get off your fucking ass” and cheer.
Sometimes my sister can be a real bitch.
God damn get rid of that new kicker, barely made the extra point
The Jew with the golden shoe is available
Don T just beat me in DFO2 with that run back
Things are getting downright creepy between Gruden and Wentz.
http://theinsidedrop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/chris-hansen.png
The bouncers at P♂ise nightclub have already been alerted.
WOOOO!!! I came back from a cig to see that. I don’t care we already lost.
HOLY SHIT JAY CUTLER IS A COMMENTARIATE?
How have you kept this a secret for so long? Does John Fox smell like sour milk? I have heard this.
ONSIDE KICK! I SWEAR TO GOD IF FOX DOESN’T, HE SHOULD BE SET ON FIRE IN THE PARKING LOT!
ALSO IF HE DOES IS OKAY TOO!
Gah. FINISH THEM.
That’s the first bears special teams touchdown since 2012
Gruden: I wish I had Wentz when I coached.
Dont you remember you DID have a tall, stupid looking red headed guy in Tampa that won you a ring?
“No.”
– Trent Green
Garbagepuntdown!
Yay garbage punt return TD!
So…much…homoerotic…tension…
Now that’s just ridiculous Jon.
Noodle slapping is a totally legitimate hobby
I know I should turn this abomination off, but there’s no more football for two whole days, so I’m gonna stick it out to the bitter end.
fucking fantasy implications man
i’m only here because I’m hoping last year’s champ loses
I really hate the NFL. No, I hate all of football. No, no…I hate sports in general.
No, no, no…I hate everything.
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zRBlZDDe6ZM/UdPVbrPJoFI/AAAAAAAAQqQ/VNMCjaou00I/s500/adg8.gif
http://67.media.tumblr.com/d2d582c8d648a5eae914111f741a1777/tumblr_o4ioz7zGAY1tzhfupo1_1280.jpg
Thank you!!!!!!
Leave the Moss Covered 3-Handled Family Credenza out of this.
World’s finest globes:
http://www.1worldglobes.com/images/rep9.jpg
Counterpoint:
http://esq.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/15/07/54d91b58a924d_-_esq-alison-brie-0513-de.jpg
Of similar intent.
http://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/1909521/81428665.gif
http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h294/carlosdeco/inescudna1.jpg
http://67.media.tumblr.com/db0f58f8883be1a201460ceebdd54c9c/tumblr_nc9w52LPnm1s8j019o3_500.gif
The problem with this team is they have to play two halves of football a game. They need to petition the league to only play the first half.
John Fox contemplating the quickest path to a mid-season retirement.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-CA06CXUfRBA/UdPVXJW7HMI/AAAAAAAAQpU/vKBFGUD13wI/s500/adg1.gif
It’s the NFL, so rape, murder, and domestic violence won’t do it. He should go with smoking weed.
He could protest injustice.
this 4th quarter has been an absolute comedic DELIGHT!