Kudos to those of you that viewed *all* the football yesterday. That is an amazing commitment on your part. Between the booze and the better half staring at me with her hands on her hips I was not able to get it done. I don’t use the word ‘hero’ very often but you folks are the true heroes of this site. You’re the glue that keeps the macaroni on the construction paper of the open threads. TO THE GAME!
NYG/MINNY-[looks at Giants injury report] WHY GOD, WHY? Hey, remember last year when the Giants secondary was struck by a rash-ton of injuries? Well, looky here-tonight cb Rogers-Cromartie is limited, Apple is done and safeties Thompson and Berhe are out. That means that qb Bradford, he of the 67.8 completion % and passer rating of 107.8 might just have himself a walk in the park. He’s very accurate on short/medium routes so look for wr Diggs and te Rudolph to shine. BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE! The Vikes have 15 sacks in three games and are going up against an average O-Line. This is the very situation where the Giants need Eli to pull the old 420 yards passing gem out of his ass. It’s not out of the realm of rational thinking given his wr trio of OBJ, Cruz and Shepherd.
Now…START YOUR KEYBOARDS, GENTLEMAN!
Nowhere to be today? Four-month-old keeping you up all night? Time for a Pinedrops IPA from Deschutes Brewing Co.
http://www.reactiongifs.us/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/good_motherfucking_choice_dave_chappel.gif
MTWV, stop living in fear of your father. I did until I was 32 and look how fucked up I am. YOU DON’T OWE HIM SHIT. You owe yourself every second of your life as spent moving forward towards making your life and the world around you better, but even then there are still moments when and people with whom you just have to cut your losses or at least become selfish as fuck because it’s your life and not anyone else’s. And if you lose sight of that fact, life can get miserable quickly.
I’m glad you dropped the class. To get all “I pay your salary!” for a moment, you do pay the professor’s salary and he doesn’t owe you special treatment but he does owe you that he does his job competently. If he fails at that, then you owe it to yourself to withdraw and don’t owe him a goddamn cent of your money. Put it towards a class that does fulfill the purpose of benefiting you and your degree goal so you can graduate and have the career you want and never have to worry about him again. That said, everybody eats shit sometimes. But there has to be a purpose or benefit to doing so or else you’re just (in this case) paying for the privilege of a consuming a Goodell’s worth of horse shit just to enjoy the taste.
I quit my job last week because it was a waste of my time. The money wasn’t worth it. The physical activity to go along with it wasn’t worth it. It was six weeks of me busting my back and cutting up my hands that did nothing to push me towards my goals. So on to the next opportunity, which is to accept the reality that I am a motherfucking lawyer and I should be practicing law and anything that doesn’t drive me towards that goal is a waste of my time (Yes, that includes this site).
Go and do likewise.
http://www.pleated-jeans.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/twoyellows.gif
http://67.media.tumblr.com/6855d6dd45f1fdca4d47ac8cd95fa96b/tumblr_o8b6z1pylB1qi9c42o1_1280.png
You’re going to force us to watch Legends of Chamberlain Heights on repeat?
http://i36.tinypic.com/fmpa9u.jpg
BERNIE SANDERS’ PLAN IS WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORKING!!!
http://68.media.tumblr.com/a324e8ee875bb844b71bc1029c1a8a3e/tumblr_n6pqzj04uS1qiwrzoo1_500.gif
http://66.media.tumblr.com/f925168ddc5ea01287d0a5b186ae5f6b/tumblr_o8d99uIRk31syjihfo1_500.jpg
http://67.media.tumblr.com/dbaf4dba1bcb2963dce868c890224198/tumblr_o4x6nb1UWN1smy9ueo1_400.gif
This madwoman has a boyfriend and I can’t talk to women. What a world.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/national/finally-someone-who-thinks-like-me/2016/10/01/c9b6f334-7f68-11e6-9070-5c4905bf40dc_story.html
Her vote counts as much as yours, ppl forget that. Heck, hers counts more than most because she’s in Pennsylvania!
Mine’s going to be negated by some idiot Berniebro who’s still pissed off by the first person he was passionate about losing and now said moron is going to vote for anyone but Hillary because he’s a petulant child with no sense of reality. And I live in the bluest of blue states. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
http://67.media.tumblr.com/e3c3ce274ef1bb8b6b309e10d14c6050/tumblr_inline_mggq0mv2io1qa7v4a.gif
She also has access to Thorazine.
http://img1.joyreactor.com/pics/post/gif-simpsons-homer-simpson-fly-305389.gif
I’m not sure if I like my late-night pain meds or not. I can hear myself blink.
Wow. Scallop pots in this restaurant’s “back yard.” That’s dope.
While I am still up. I want to give a thank you to Unsurprised for threatening me if I went back to the class I hate tomorrow. I still am not sure how I will sell dropping the class but I really don’t want to go back to it.
Tell the truth. Pick another class if you need for financial aid or whatever, but life is too short to eat shit without something to show for it at the end.
The moment Subway invents a de-smeller, it will own the world.
I’d rather this de-smeller be on the subway. Don’t need to deal with that smell of bum ass during my transfers.
One cider and my head is throbbing. What has the world come too?
WOO!
That is all!
Damn it. Does everyone around here get laid but me and Senor Weaselo?
Is anyone else thinking what I’m thinking?
I call dibs on Top
If you’re thinking Thai massage then we are on the same page.
No, no, there’s a running bet between me and Redshirt. Okay, I’m the only one who had action on that bet—I’ve got 20 Weaselo bucks (not legal tender) on him on account of he’s younger, if I’m correct.
Oh, fuck. I’m probably as old as the two of you fuckers combined.
Not much I can do there, sorry.
I got some money on that bet.
You’re not gonna divulge on whom that money’s on?
Redshirt is a Republican, and somehow for reasons I cannot fathom, women actually fuck them. Whereas you are … You remind me of me when I was your age, and I hope to God that’s not accurate.
Well in my favor is the musician part, but since I’ve almost exclusively attempted to date other musicians it doesn’t actually do anything to benefit me.
Yeah, you should do something about that. You’re a professional musician in New York. How are you not swimming in women?
Carpal tunnel.
I’ll take some of that action if possible
Only reason to watch James Corden: ex-Top Gear boys racing. And Hammond wins. And still isn’t as tall as Clarkson WITH A PODIUM.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/6a704ef735ab5ee3c345e6b068b2b7ff/tumblr_nmo45nD8pq1rsxqqio1_500.jpg
What? It was purring!
I think that’s an aftermarket part. Say goodbye to your warranty.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lm78k1Xh9i1qkbcmjo1_1280.jpg
http://25.media.tumblr.com/b9ff68270c5e587b34c3d61f3bd3f72b/tumblr_mwa9poJ1eA1qhkkp7o4_250.gif
http://cdn.collider.com/wp-content/uploads/captain-america-the-first-avenger-movie-image-53.jpg
It seems Conviction premiered tonight or yesterday or whatever. Point is that someone made a bunch of gifs from it.
http://116.imagebam.com/download/bH2bH-_JgbPtegUxB2VI7A/50770/507694647/Hayley05.gif
I’m convicting her of an illegally concealed rack.
Seems like an open carry to me. Unlike here. This is clearly a concealed weapon.
http://116.imagebam.com/download/yBnbstygi2B435Yz6Xrhgg/50770/507693982/Hayley04.gif
Now THIS is illegal concealment of the cruelest sort.
https://gfycat.com/NewSourIriomotecat
That’s just not right
This cider is great. It doesn’t have the tart bite at the end most do.
It seems like forever since I watched Big Trouble In Little China, so I’m correcting that at the moment.
I hear there was a footed ball game on earlier.
I’ve still never seen it. It is on Netflix so I will start watching it again. No promises about giving up and watching an ep of Daredevil instead though. I didn’t even hit post and I talked myself out of it. Daredevil it is.
It’s all good. It’s an acquired taste.
Yeah but it stars Snake Plissken. I should watch it eventually.
If the movie has a failing, it’s in not showing Kim Cattrall hogtied for more than a second or two.
Finally just finished Luke Cage, my one complaint. They accurately portrayed how terrible cops are at their jobs and it made me sad
“Disgusting! Some White People Are Complaining That Luke Cage Is ‘So Black'”
http://www.bet.com/celebrities/news/2016/10/03/luke-cage-so-black.html
Never fucking change.
Got a 22oz apple cider fermented with Belgian yeast and maple syrup. It poured like pink grapefruit juice, and then mellowed to a light, pinkish gold. It’s pretty tasty.
https://untappd.com/b/crispin-cider-company-the-saint/10894
OK. I’ve got to find me some of this to try.
Perfect.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/d86e3bd0aa9e26ebd82b59c9bc37b0ee/tumblr_o5mrq1SuXN1ql8t12o1_1280.jpg
So, while cell phone radiation has a possibly carcinogenic classification, it lies in the same group as noted dangers caffeine, gasoline fumes, aloe vera, and pickled vegetables. Plus, the only case in which an adequate amount of evidence existed was from handheld cell phones and not environmental/occupational sources.
It was fun researching this since it took about half an hour for me to figure out I shouldn’t worry about this shit.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/8337ee32854bd66a6b12e074ce302c92/tumblr_mkxy2kAmAR1s5rsdao1_1280.jpg
Caption: Is there a boogie in your butt?
Non-ionizing radiation is fine. Just keep repeating that.
It’s certainly no more risky than any number of other things we expose ourselves to on a daily basis.
What these loons forget about is that it’s not about proving something “safe” it’s about figuring out what a harmful dose is. Hell, pure water can kill you if you drink too much of it at once so in a sense it isn’t “safe” to consume.
“OMG BAN DHMO!”
The fact that that’s a thing is hysterical. But mostly sad.
And your scientific training is in…law.
That’s right, I forgot how much new lawyers know.
I don’t shit about dick.
*Know
But, more importantly, I agree with you, Sill.
I can sense your sarcasm.
It’s just that during my Ph.D. training I went through three radiology courses, all of which require a thorough understanding of the different forms of radiation and their effects on human cells, tissues, and organs.
I used to go over MRIs with neurosurgeons so that they could do their best to avoid the optic radiations throughout the brain architecture during excision surgeries. Apart from death and paralysis, blindness is the worst outcome possible following these types of surgeries, so many different scans are performed with many different types of radiation. If I didn’t know the difference I would have most likely contributed to a blindness outcome or worse. I never did, because I do.
But, more importantly, I don’t care whether or not you agree with me, Unsurprised. Because I’m not right. I just know the science.
But
This is the problem with being an asshole. Even when I’m trying to be serious and sincere I still fuck it up.
That being said, I think I get what you’re saying.
Do you remember back in the early ’90s when a three minute cell-phone call would roast your ear? Good times … or bad … whatever …
http://c8.alamy.com/comp/DC14XB/roasted-ear-of-corn-betaab-valley-near-pahalgam-jammu-kashmir-india-DC14XB.jpg
Waste heat
http://66.media.tumblr.com/f2e10dd004aeca2b6df535eb33e0a208/tumblr_o64biuWOcG1qjnhqgo1_500.jpg
Is that the same raccoon from the McDonald’s brawl?
http://67.media.tumblr.com/7219a426453fd93bde2da7e79564e9a9/tumblr_o5r04yxd3p1r6g9m4o3_400.gif
Don’t forget the video!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bht96voReEo
http://68.media.tumblr.com/04ad96486978a87224ae164d3076ff23/tumblr_o9sscgq8f01ql8t12o1_1280.jpg
I MUST HAVE IT
Time fur yur update.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/c9dd4c74b4c6ac3dc8bb8fa5cb618501/tumblr_o6bv94YNUK1ql8t12o1_540.gif
http://66.media.tumblr.com/d8c149ac283474f4b21095434047fe4c/tumblr_o5w0h5jaOB1ql8t12o1_1280.png
It’s amazing that I ever thought that Billy Corgan couldn’t possibly become more of a self-absorbed, irrational asshole, but…there it is.
http://theoutloudblog.files.wordpress.com/2007/01/head-up-ass.jpg
Dude doesn’t have one penny of my money.
I really wasn’t a big fan.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/f7611341b582f5f9af3e2e34f983db45/tumblr_o8dhabAfr11qmlfmgo1_1280.jpg
Shana tova?
What a dickhead
There’s a big difference between feeling like your circumcision did you lasting harm and expressing that feeling in such a stupid manner.
If you feel the former, then you are probably one who does the latter
A friend of mine wasn’t circumcised until his late 20’s so he’s had experience with and without his foreskin. His conclusion? No big deal.
Having foreskin sucks, especially since I’m already below average.
I think I’d enjoy having a foreskin if me dick were really gnarly looking. I could call it Belichick.
Hey lady! Do you want to meet ‘The Genius??’
Smart AND hardheaded.
MMMMM calamari,
I just saw that Corolla ad you were all talking about earlier.
Yeah, that’s pretty fucking terrible.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/35d80cd5b5f7cb3777c66ca4c971c16c/tumblr_ny1sxsMUD61ql8t12o1_1280.png
NOW LETS RIP OUT SOME FUCKIN HEARTS WOO
http://images.fineartamerica.com/images-medium-large/aztec-human-sacrifice-codex-photo-researchers.jpg
If they did this after every game, I’d be the first and loudest supporter for moving a team to Mexico City.
I’d recommend the Cowboys, because fuck ’em. Barring that, the Browns. Their fans are already used to getting their hearts ripped out. Time for someone else to for a change.
Your Tenochtitlan Jaguars!
NOOOOOOOOOOO
Although Shere Khan certainly does have the moustache to pull of the Mexican Kingpin look.
I take that back. Move the Lions. The Lions were my first favorite team, for like the six days between the first MNF game I saw and the next (then I became a um … uh … Washington fan).
The Lions deserve to either get their hearts ripped out IN GLORRRRREEEEEEEE or lose their hearts for being utter failures, but it seems only fair that at the end of a Lions game, some motherfucker(s) die.
Early morning flight, so no late night dick jokery for me this evening. Wake me if anyone says anything really funny. Peace.
Did you say dick jokery?
http://67.media.tumblr.com/d0a24ee4604a83b9b4c8745b0f55c644/tumblr_odjylg2S3B1rvdv9ao1_1280.jpg
I know one shouldn’t get too far ahead of oneself after Week Four, but the Donks and Vikes really look good, don’t they?
I mean, Superb Owl Li would probably end 5-3, but hot damn, there’d be some fine hittin’. And Beansie!
Pats/Iggles could play in an alternate “Superb Owl of Evil.”
http://67.media.tumblr.com/aa6aa6eb57607d6f1431b0f50b60b6b7/tumblr_o8h7s3MBTK1sliee9o1_1280.jpg
Uh … Maybe these anti-rGBH people are onto something.
It’s a long season, my fren.
I’m not convinced on the Vikes. Bradford won’t last the entire season.
Are you saying that the people who received him as a trade won’t get what they paid for?
I believe there’s a term for that.
If I used proper nouns, I’d self-submit this for banner quote. Mainly because I am intent on driving this joke into the ground and then beating it to death with a dead horse.
Superb Owl Li, you say? Is this what they’ll give out instead of the Lombardy Trophy?
http://2static3.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/Nyandroid+used+roll+picture+nyandroid+rolled+image+he+fell+_254f110c5c7e29edc67a75e84835b7ba.jpg
One thing I think we can all be grateful for is that we weren’t around for the Silly Hats Age.
I disagree, I want a silly hat!
It would get old fast if you had to wear it every day.
In the summer.
A 16+ oz. piece of stiff, heavy felt.
Yeeeaaaaahhhhhh no.
Did I mention that the felt is so stiff and heavy because it’s drenched in mercury?
I’d actually enjoy hats such as those coming back into style amongst the insufferable just to see them poison themselves with liquid metal.
The hell you say. I would’ve looked spectacular in a Navy cocked hat.
Cam Newton begs to differ. As soon as the swelling in his head goes down, he’s wearing one of those.