TGISF…aka “tWBS Watches Horrible Movies and TV Just to See Amanda Seyfried” Sexy Friday Open Thread

Yep, it’s true.  Perhaps sadly.  Pathetically?  Yeah, perhaps.  But still true nonetheless.

I’ve watched so many horrible movies and TV shows, sometimes more often than I’d care to admit, just to watch that little quirky smirky smile on that adorable little face.  And the rest of her ain’t bad, either.  Don’t judge me.

/knows you’re gonna judge me

//doesn’t care

Dear John..check.

Image result for amanda seyfried dear john gif

 

Mamma Mia…check.

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Jennifer’s Body…double check.

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Red Riding Hood…hella check.

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In Time…ginger check.

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And many others too.  I’ve not watched Lovelace yet tho.  I’m afraid my penis might explode.

Oh, and also Veronica Mars…check.  But that was a good show actually.  At least at first, even though she was technically dead for most of her run on it.  And plus it had Kristen Bell too.  But we’re not talking about Kristen Bell this week.  Though trust me, we will be soon enough.

But yeah I’ve kinda got a hangup for Amanda.  She’s got one for me too, she just doesn’t know it yet.  But I’ve played it cool with her so far, so no restraining order,  unlike Sara Jean.

Yet.

Worry not, there will be more Amanda later.

Not really in the mood to do much sharing this week.  I’ve shared way too much this week already.  If you were fortunate enough not to see any of it and/or not be involved, consider yourself lucky.  The tl;dr version is that I still have mild brain damage (not joking) but am not dying (yay…I think); and I once accidentally grabbed a beautiful girl’s penis (sadly….also not joking).  So yeah, you’ve gotten your tWBS embarrassing stories for the week.  If you missed them, tough shit.

So let’s review sports as quickly as possible, ignore the election results, and then get back on Amanda as quickly as possible.

Ooooh, sorry, poor choice of words.

Image result for archer phrasing

 

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No, but I am breathing heavy!!

 

Politics Free (mostly) Sports…Finally

No more baseball again.  My world will be a little more empty now, until February.  Meh.  Not that big of a difference at this point.  But at least season tix orders went out this week, that’s always fun.  Well, you know…other than the whole “having to pay for them” part.

The Ravens and the Browns ruined yet another Thursday night.

**Believe it or not, I typed the above sentence 2 days before the game, as a placeholder.  That’s why it’s in italics…so when I came in (phrasing) to do my final edit on Friday morning, and schedule the post, I’d remember to get rid of it.

But in spite of my team winning that godforsaken game by a 28-7 final, I stand by that sentence.  So it’s staying.  The win gives Baltimore sole possession atop the AFC North…for now.  But I don’t feel good about it.  No indeed.

You know what else I don’t feel good about?  These assholes.  Yeah I know these protests are not just in Baltimore.  Don’t care.  I bet half these fuckers didn’t even vote.  Look, I don’t like the results of the election either.  But guess fucking what?  I won’t be at PNC Arena tonight trying to block fans’ access and ruin their night, just to get my (now pointless) point across.

You want to start a pointless protest?  Fine.  But when you start ruining someone else’s good time you’ve crossed a line.  And then it gets talked about during a national broadcast.  Plus, this is exactly NOT bringing the country together.  All you did last night was give the President Elect one more bit of evidence (from his narrow minded standpoint, that is) why he shouldn’t give a fuck about your opinion.  FFS Baltimore.  No wonder people think we’re crass.

Hockey is starting to piss me offThat didn’t take long.  FFS Caps…really???  Blanked by the Sharks.  At home.  This is why everyone hates DC.  Or at least it used to be.  And yet the Pens and Rangers just keep chugging along, taking care of business.  I repeat….FFS.  But here’s tonight’s matchup’s anyway….

  • NJD @ BUF – 7:00pm
  • PHI @ TOR – 7:00pm
  • LA @ OTT – 7:30pm
  • WAS @ CHI – 8:30pm
  • DAL @ EDM – 9:00pm
  • WIN @ COL – 9:00pm

College Basketball gets going with reckless abandon tonight.  I’m not typing out all of those games so here’s a link to the schedule for tonight.  I might be in Raleigh tonight for our opener against Georgia Southern.  At the time of this writing, I’ve yet to decide for sure.  I guess we’ll see if I can stay sober long enough to drive over.

The NBA can kiss my ass.  I’m not linking to that abortion this week.

And so can golf.  And every other sport I’m not good at anymore.

OK, fine…tonight’s NBA schedule.

And yes, Seamus Power still sucks.  I’m starting to think he’s tanking on purpose just to tick me off.  But at least he made the cut last week and made a little money.  But shit, I coulda made the cut on that fly by night course.

OK, Amanda…Be Patient…I’m on my way back home, baby.

  • Born December 3, 1985, 30 yo (one day off from sharing tWBS’ birthday, btw…that’s gotta be a sign)
  • 5’3″, 108 lbs
  • Originally from Allentown, PA
  • Suffers from anxiety, panic attacks and stage fright
  • For some reason is into taxidermy (no shit…I’m not joking)

Unlike Sara Jean, I don’t even remotely know anyone who has interactions with Amanda, so I don’t know of her character.  For all I know she’s a total bitch.  But she’s really really cute tho….so not a problem.  And I don’t think she is a bitch.  With a face and body like that, how could she be?(yeah…I heard it).  But really, I don’t think she is.

But I’ve been wrong before about such things.

Anywhoo….

Bedroom eyes, or simmering rage?

Image result for amanda seyfried
Meh, who cares? I’m going in.

This one just isn’t fair.  Jeebus.

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Keep the boots on, plz. (2nd consecutive week for that request from moi)

Here, kitty kitty…

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Serpentine, Babou!!!! (ha, nailed it)

Bedroom eyes, or simmering rage? (pt deux)

seyfriedesq2
This time I’m going to presume you don’t plan to stab me, at least not while wearing that.

You uh…you look like you need some assistance…

Image result for amanda seyfried
Don’t worry, they aren’t that saggy yet.  Wait, let me rephrase that.  Yep, I finally earned the stabbing.

I like your new retro look my dear.  You do it well.

Image result for amanda seyfried
Hey Amanda, hon!?! I think somebody stole our fucking tablecloth.

Love the hat, yes.

amandahatfishnet
Dammit!!! Now my new Tuna net has gone missing too? Crime is out of hand in this neighbourhood, hon. We need to move.

I um…..ummmmm…umm…

Image result for amanda seyfried
Yeah, just gonna stick with “Ummmmm”.

Yay foar polka dots…

Image result for amanda seyfried
And also for….ummmmm….

Dammit, did you take my last Diet Coke AGAIN?!?!?!?

4acfd6dc7ed34dccde5e9a263e77495c
Oh shit, I was so worried about stabbings I never even thought of shootings.

Ok, Ok….you can have it…

amanda-seyfried-in-time4
Whew…blanks. Also, note to self…buy more Diet Coke.

And just like that, I refer you back to….ummmmm…

amanda-seyfried-hot-wallpapers-6-_3_1_
Somebody’s been doing their crunches. Yes, I already knew it wasn’t me, but you didn’t have to say it.

Again, I might be risking a stabbing…

Image result for amanda seyfried
Again, totally worth the risk.

You look nice, but that wall ain’t gonna paint itself, dear….

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OK, let me take that knife from you, and get you a paintbrush.

Sorry guys…can’t get drunk and watch the game with ya’s.  Amanda seems open to some experimentation tonight.

Image result for amanda seyfried
…three days later, tWBS’ body was found bound and stabbed repeatedly. But he was still smiling.

Amanda had already fled the scene and was never heard from again.

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Just please don’t ask what’s in the basket.

 

OK, after getting you all hot and bothered (but just remember she’s mine and you can’t have her), it’s now time to soothe you I suppose.  In fact, you’re gonna get two soothing tWBS originals.

This first photo was taken by yours truly about a week ago. On this morning I was returning home from swimming laps and noticed this mist hanging eerily in the fields across from where I live.  Just the mist itself was cool as shit, so I got out to see if it would translate photographically (I nearly always have my camera in the truck with me).  As I walked across the road and approached the field, I spotted this trio having an early breakfast.  Sadly, I couldn’t use the proper settings which would have improved the grainy appearance because they would stop moving.  But I do still kinda love this photo.  I hope you do too.

horsesinthemist-2
Horses In The Mist. It was a pretty calming scene.

And this one was the sunset over the lake from 2 nights ago.  This wasn’t as calming at the time because it was cold and windy as shit and I ran out the door, camera in hand, dressed in shorts and T-shirt without putting on a jacket and froze my ass off waiting.  But it’s calming to look at now, so totally worth it.

sunset110916
No real title for this one yet. So far it’s called Sunset110916. Imaginative, huh?

I’ve yet to decide on a theme next week.  Feel free to make suggestions.  And they don’t have to be just about one person.  That just kinda happened the past two weeks and will likely happen some in the future.  But variety is the spice of life.

Have a nice weekend folks.

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theeWeeBabySeamus
An unapologetic, even if often manic-depressive (it's a requirement given his choices of sports teams), fan of NC State University, the Baltimore Ravens and the Baltimore Orioles. When not parked in front of the computer and/or TV, can often be found on the golf course shouting obscenities to no one in particular.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“ Your memory is a monster; you forget—it doesn’t. It simply files things away. It keeps things for you, or hides things from you—and summons them to your recall with a will of its own. You think you have a memory; but it has you. ”

— John Irving

Brocky

i’ll never understand the flak iu gets. bobby knight has been gone a while

people are so unwilling to casually root for us.

there’s a sports metaphor for us, iu is the “such and such” team of the big ten

Brocky

Oh for fucks sake…

Watching the iu game,

Announcer Well if this kid doesn’t get drafted by the NBA, he likely could walk onto a nfl as a tight end.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Gallows humor, but damn:

“Crowning Achievement: Donald Trump Has Just Accomplished His Lifelong Goal Of Kicking The Nation’s Most Powerful Black Family Out Of Their House.”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Brocky

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Makes a living off of having fun…. so she probably is.

Brocky

It feels weird thanking veterans knowing this country elected a draft dodger

Brocky

I’m sorry for leading off with that. Just heard it today and it’d been stuck in my head

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Brocky

Oh god a rott puppy.

Feeling that temptation to get another dog again…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Please do it; mine is aging and through all of this I just love her that much more.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

There is a great dog in a shelter that needs you just as much as you need it.

Brocky

oh god, my heart.

already got a pooch though, and I hate to say it, but its a handful on its own, and the living situation aint so great either, i’d be doing the poor thing a disservice.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Oh, if that is the case then a small pack is the best like you said.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
JustStopDude

In defense of the protesters downtown, fuck suburbanites.

Fuckers fund the goddamn violence…or at least their smack addled teens…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Not over generalizing; Smack Addled Teens is also a spanking website.

Horatio Cornblower

Not really my ideal threesome but I’ll take a shot at it.

Horatio Cornblower

The little know Curious George story where Andy Reid tried to eat him.

herodotus450

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Gratliff

God. I fucking hate Flyers goaltenders

WCS

God. I hate Flyers.

FIFY

Gratliff

Orange is not a happy color this week

WCS

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

I like the puck fancy stats, and the Flyers are where they should be based upon their goaltending so far.

Gratliff

I didn’t know that “Shit%” was an advanced metric

WCS

#20 Track Suits win, 87-59 over Mount Saint Mary’s.

Wagner beats #18 UCONN, 67-58. Back into the locker, Horatio.

Nicholls State defeats BAWSTAHN CAWLEDGE. BC can eat a severed donkey dick.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

My favorite moment from preseason/early season basketball last season:

St. John’s under Chris Mullin is generating some publicity and people are curious how to season will go. Carnesecca Arena is packed with excitement as they… lose to a Division II team by 38.

http://www.redstormsports.com/sports/m-baskbl/stats/2015-2016/110415.html

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

32, same shit.

Horatio Cornblower

Bobby Wood is fucking good.

Also I’m a poet.

ballsofsteelandfury

You should write porn reviews

ballsofsteelandfury

For tWBS:

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Horatio Cornblower

The fuck are these Mexicans doing beating the USMNT? Don’t they know who won the election!?

ballsofsteelandfury

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Horatio Cornblower

Amanda is very, very attractive but 5’3″ and 108? There’s no way I’m not breaking that in half.

Because I am fat and clumsy, you see.

ballsofsteelandfury

No mention of the Mexico-US WC Qualifier? Tell you what, if Mexico wins, the theme next week is Mexican ladies.

And they have to actually be Mexican. Don’t throw no Argentinian or Colombian ladies in there.

Deal? Deal.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

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ballsofsteelandfury

I’ll take that as challenge accepted.

Horatio Cornblower

Hey look, Bradley fucked up again!

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Och!

(That was to get tWBS’ attention)

Good price-point for an HRTN poster. $30? Too much?

ballsofsteelandfury

What’s the size? I just checked All-Posters and everything was around ten bucks.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

24×36…going through Zazzle. Lemme check out All-Posters…

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Looks like All-Posters is pretty much mass-market. The HRTN poster is POD only, which makes it more expensive, unfortunately.

ballsofsteelandfury

I don’t know what POD is, but I’ll buy one no matter the price point. I’m not sure what others will be comparing it with.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Print On Demand. Basically, one at a time, like Lulu does with books. There’s no way I can do a mass-printing of HRTN posters, so that limits my manufacturing & distribution method.

ballsofsteelandfury

Ah! In that case, $30 is reasonable. As long as we tell people they are getting something extremely unique, $30 is no big deal.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Och! Y’know, common cinematic Celtic expression…

SonOfSpam

#WolfPackinItInAlready

SonOfSpam

Shit 1-0 Mexico. Only 20 minutes in.

At least we don’t have Juarez.

Kungjitsu

I saw Doctor Strange. I liked it a lot more than I thought I would.

Gratliff

Now Wayne Simmonds with the shorthanded breakaway goal. Toronto loves losing.

WCS

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Friday night baby photo.

SonOfSpam

Invisible Friday Night Babies are rumored to be playing Coachella next year.

WCS

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

in Penn-HAHHAVHD. Which means, someone said something about someone else’s trust fund.

SonOfSpam

Also on the teevee tonite, our lesser footy national team taking on the rapists from south of the border. Just started…and we’re not losing yet!

Hooray fucking Friday.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I will watch the second half if we aren’t being blown out by then. So probably won’t watch it

Old School Zero

Don’t know much about history
Can’t figure out technology
I read the bible it’s my only book
My ethics make me a crook

But you elected me your senator
And I’m old and white and dumb as hell
Oh what a wonderful term this will be

SonOfSpam

Really enjoyed those two pix. You have some talent hidden under those layers of filth.

Horatio Cornblower

This is just about the cleanest image I could find from ‘Chloe’

http://www.celebridoodle.com/.a/6a00e5536b2ba988330147e060f9fe970b-640wi

WCS

It’s nobody’s fault but your’s.

SonOfSpam
Horatio Cornblower

One of my favorite comments from some long-forgotten hero on, I think, FilmDrunk, was the following:

Director: “Amanda look right into the camera”

Amanda: “With which eye?”

Kungjitsu

Isn’t Amanda Seyfried the one who sent those nekkid pictures to Affleck that Jennifer Garner found on that muhfucka’s phone?

I hate him. He’s really ruined JG for me (touched Affleck 2/10 would not bang). I get why Matt Damon is a star, but Affleck sucks in everything that isn’t BAWSTON related. Fuck that guy.

Kungjitsu

Strangely, I like Casey Affleck.

WCS

Unsurprised

You should see Chloe

SonOfSpam

Or at least like two minutes of it (if I’m being honest, maybe one minute and a few seconds)

Bloody Lethal
Gratliff

Speaking of sexy, holy shit, Travis Konecny:
https://twitter.com/BroadStHockey/status/797235312279912450

WCS

The King of Track Suits makes his 2016-17 debut, AND Penn plays HAHHVAHD in football.

I think I may belay the booze tonight, in favor of getting nice and Xanax’ed up.

WCS

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WCS

The burning means it’s working!

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