Your “But I Wanna Watch The Game! Aunt Lilly Is Boring As Hell. And Racist!” NFL Football Thanksgiving Open Thread

Now what’s with all this talk I hear about 2015 being bad/sucky? You have in front of you TWO(!) Thanksgiving tilts that feature teams over .500 playing games that have implications in their divisions. If this is Trump’s America, I’m all for it. Hell, I want him to sing the Star-Spangled Banner before each of the games. I can see Ivanka and Melania gently swaying and humming in the background, their tattered bikini’s leaving little to the imagination of the American public. Behind them marching in single file, 100 of the oiliest, shredded and shirtless firefighters/policemen reminding us of their commitment to keeping us safe. “STRENTH THOUGH JOY” the mis-spelled banners will proclaim because “G’s” and “R’s” will be subject to rationing going forward-but you get the idea. If you do get the idea you are federally-mandated to explain it to those who don’t. To all those nay-sayers out there I say-AMERICA’S GLASS OF PBR WILL ALWAYS BE HALF-FULL! TO THE GAME!

Min/Det-God, when was the last time the Lions were playing a game that mattered? It must have been back when a young and aloof Barry Sanders was merrily skipping his way past flummoxed defenders and he retired in ’99. [sees that Detroit made the playoffs in ’11 and ’14] Huh. Well, I’ll be bedazzled! The winner of this one will have the inside track on the division title. As noted in this here blog, the Packers are going nowhere fast and that anchor they call a D has a great deal of momentum. So have at it Lions and Vikes, make it a good one.

A Short Note To Readers Out There: If you’ve thought about commenting I strongly encourage you to dip your toes in on a day like today. Everyone around here is pretty cool and relaxed and smart and intelligent and boozy and full-bellied (at the moment or shortly). Let us know how your day is going, who your team is, what you made to eat, what you’re drinking, how obnoxious your family is, etc. You know you want to and it’s a great excuse to get away from it all if only for a minute or two. If you’re on your own, all the more reason to join this wee band of ragamuffins. We always like to see new faces/avatars and we promise to treat you with respect and we may even grow to love you.

There she is, TYPE YOU FARGIN BASTIGES, TYPE!