INT. RECORDING STUDIO – EVENING
Open on an empty studio. The door opens and GARY KUBIAK and a PRODUCER step through, chatting happily. GARY KUBIAK takes a seat at the booth.
PRODUCER: …and I’ll be in here with you for the interview segment, and then I’ll head out to the other side of the glass for the rest of the hour.
KUBIAK: Okay, sounds good. Thanks for such a thorough rundown.
PRODUCER: Well, your doctor asked us to keep the surprises to a minimum.
KUBIAK: [laughs gently] Ha ha ha, no objections from me!
Outside the booth, the intern CONNOR taps on the glass and then counts down with his fingers before hitting a button on the console.
PRODUCER: Greetings! I’m so thrilled to have all you football and music fans back with us for another season of Request Line! Our first guest of the season is former Broncos head coach Gary Kubiak. Welcome, Gary!
KUBIAK: Thanks for having me. It’s an honor to be here.
PRODUCER: So after one last delicious victory over the Raiders, your time as a head coach in the NFL has come to an end.
KUBIAK: It has, I’m sorry to say. Physically I just wasn’t able to keep up with the rigors of coaching. The stress was taking its toll on my health, so for the good of myself and my family I decided it was time to step away from the game.
PRODUCER: That final victory over the Raiders must have been an exciting way to go out.
KUBIAK: It was nice.
PRODUCER: And what did you think of the Super Bowl?
KUBIAK: To be honest, I didn’t even watch. I went hiking with my nieces instead.
PRODUCER: Oh, wow.
KUBIAK: Yeah, right now it’s all about getting back to living a normal life. I think after the last three weeks we could all agree that “normal” sounds just terrific.
PRODUCER: Are you planning on staying in Denver?
KUBIAK: Until the end of the school year. After that, we’ll see. I’m told the Florida panhandle is nice.
PRODUCER: So now that you’ve had a taste of it, is there any chance you’d like to spend more time in the broadcast booth?
KUBIAK: Oh, I doubt it. As much as I’d like to knife Joe Buck in the throat, I…
PRODUCER: I’m sorry?
KUBIAK: [mildly] Hmm? I said, as much as I’d like to knock Joe Buck off his throne, I think I’ll just enjoy retirement for a while before I think about doing anything else.
PRODUCER: Well, that covers all the questions I had. Let’s get to the requests. I have to say, this interview has been refreshingly…normal.
KUBIAK: That’s the plan. Nice and normal.
The PRODUCER steps out of the booth.
KUBIAK: So for all you listeners out there, this week’s topic is “Hearts”. I’d like to dedicate this first song to my wife Rhonda. My heart is yours, darling. Please take good care of it.
Bad Reputation – Joan Jett and the Black You Knows
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5RAQXg0IdfI
Yeah it’s a stretch.
Huey Lewis & The News Heart and Soul
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8TdaXhpjHws
Make it a double, Heart of R&Roll
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=M7JVlpm0eRs
Still love ⬆️
The fellas at the Overkill Division send Ashtray Heart by Capt. Beefheart
https://youtube.com/watch?v=xf26h8pD8e4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uSvyIJlcFR0
Double shot.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3vlt00iCUzA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6UD0c58nNCQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Q4OtBeS1S0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sN0b-adUt9I
STP in the hizzy (which is, I believe, slang for “vagina”)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HVPzWkdhwrw
NERDIER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vH70BDA749Y
Phish – Poor Heart
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-MSysORmPc
Modest Mouse – Heart cooks brain
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2qgEl4KWB4
My hearts and thoughts, they faaade away…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2z0cKtSlHOU
My van has a waterbed in the back and a circular window . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0OX_8YvFxA
Gentlemen, say hello to the second base mobile.
http://i.imgur.com/ASDaIj8.png
Let’s go nerdy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hf3CJZAAz2g
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7JyZmcl8Gw
Mullet Bono is best Bono:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uIuAFBRyjj4
Willie & Waylon – Good-Hearted Woman
https://youtu.be/dVBbDOWLR70
Gerry & the Pacemakers – Ferry Across the Mersey
https://youtu.be/08083BNaYcA
Straight outta Orange County.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBhA1WeHors
I didn’t realize how many amazing songs have Heart in it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eh44QPT1mPE
yeah right’s pick reminded me of the only good thing off of that horrible album where Santana collaborated with Dave Matthews, Rob Thomas, and Everlast (I would have rather he collaborated with Dave Thomas and a bottle of everclear):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t6omUxqhG78
How is this not the first listing?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6P0SitRwy8
True story, I’d actually had that penciled in as the intro song.
If you aren’t familiar with early Queen I recommend getting familiar.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ESJ3iH9i04Q
Hell yes.
THIS SONG I CALL IT HEARTBURN CAUSE THIS HEART’S ON FIRE.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KdzCCfRZ_I
In any language:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXv31OmnKqQ
Really old country: Ray Price – Heartache No. 1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SfEmGMO8-Ss
THIS SONG HEARTACHE NO. 1 I CALL IT SAN MARINO CAUSE IT’S ARGUABLY THE OLDEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD.
He missed an opportunity to collaborate with Ray Rice on songs about other body parts aching due to too much love.
Goddamnit, BFC, the Kellen Winslow Jr. joke was sitting RIGHT THERE!
I don’t touch anything where Kellen Winslow is sitting
Last for me and definitely not least (and yes I know the Led Zep version was posted already)
Dread Zeppelin – Heartbreaker (At The End Of Lonely Street)
https://youtu.be/rAM1MKi7bNU
Five songs and you’re quitting? If only our President had your work ethic.
I only post songs I actually have in my collection, a self imposed rule so I don’t go overboard, so I looked to find one more, just for you RTD
Rod Stewart – You’re in My Heart
https://youtu.be/zZTwASoqkns
How did we miss some BON FUCKIN’ JOVI?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gJ0Yd-Pburs
Thievery Corporation – The Heart’s A Lonely Hunter ( ft. David Byrne )
https://youtu.be/KXKiK-c8xTg
Total Eclipse of the Heart – The Dan Band
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXKIECZpvqg
Winrar
Really fun live show if you ever get the chance.
Since Cuntler took Heart of Gold
Heart of Glass – Blondie
https://youtu.be/WGU_4-5RaxU
Was gonna be my 1st spin
Mine too, but I’m soooo late.
Foolish Heart – Grateful Dead
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i4mcdEq_XSU
(Their 80’s videos are terrible)
Heart of Gold (Johnny Cash version)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=drsMyeXzLSo
Yardbirds – Heart Full of Soul
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kNuQPTzuof4&w=560&h=315
Best Beck song since Sea Change
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6Zp84XH6Eo
Thin Lizzy – That Woman is Gonna Break Your Heart
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZJLpiejZ-o
Double shot for a reminder of how bad the 80s could be?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9NQJ3-77xvI
It’s not too early for a DOUBLE SHOT, is it?
IT’S NEVER TOO FUCKING EARLY FOR A DOUBLE SHOT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BI7coYKrt_Q
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XwDAiPURSCY
Fun fact: “Return to Hot Chicken” is how Andy Reid refers to a second trip to the buffet.
Weezer does Toni Braxton (I mean, songwise, not gangbangwise, although who knows):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1nwcuBa4wok
I think I’ve shown off enough of my eclectic taste with this one:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzoEK545j64
Lady Miss Kier was fine.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDRPtg0kmJU
Heartbeats – Jose Gonzalez (who, of course, is Swedish)
Bonus: Video features lots and lots of balls!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0_bx8bnCoiU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjynIAeh1tU
KUBIAK: Making my best guess on this one, hope this was what you were looking for, T.M.I. Toebw!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ckYvXVA82CI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5JZ0rOX8AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQiTKZGp-10
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uGGIrvWIFKw
Obligatory:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nwmCOSYUSlI
The OTHER Heartbreaker https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vy-QmgdUVTI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vy-QmgdUVTI
Thank goodness, I thought you were going to post this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kMCGvtlL4fw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mJZePeA_ug
I just posted a vid from the Blues Broad channel in the last day or two. Yes, I’m aware of how unamazing that is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0p8zw8QEZk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e4wFviI79VA&w=560&h=315%5D
“Hey, cockstain, put on some REAL music!”
– Todd Haley, in transit from the pool hall to the beer bust at the moon tower
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1HOE3FIQ7w
“You should go kill yourself!”
– Coach Todd Haley