So, Valentine’s Day has come and gone. And you, gentle kommentists, thought you were in the clear.
You did the dinner or the flowers or the candy or the whatever it is your girl loves. Or maybe you did all those things, you lover boy you. And your girl was looking at you with that look. That happy enough that “you’re gonna get the good loving tonight” look. You done good, son….
But don’t break your arm patting yourself on the back…..
Because I’m here to tell you there’s something you’ve overlooked. Trust me. A little later, we’re gonna talk about it.
Baseball’s almost baaaaaccckkkkk. Pitchers and Catchers are already in, position players will trickle in this weekend. My 2nd annual shitty prediction post will be upcoming in a few weeks, no doubt. Cubs and Red Sox fans will love me. Which is great because there’s nothing I love more than making those two fanbases happy.
The NHL is mostly unchanged since last week, if I’m being honest. Big game tonight between the Pens and the Jackets tho (7pm NHL Network), with only two points currently separating the two for 2nd place in the Metro, 5 pts off the pace of the Caps.
Otherwise it’s a very light NHL Slate tonight.
The NBA is what it is. I might watch some in May. I have no interest until it’s down to the Cavs/Celts and Warriors/Spurs. And I’ll have only marginally more interest then probably.
Why are they even still playing the regular season? Oh, that’s right.
That’s because it’s All-Star Weekend!!!!!!!!!!
NBA All-Star Game – East vs West
Yup, one more notch for Pat McCrory. Nice job, fucktard.
Tipoff: Sunday, February 19th, 8pm
I really don’t know or care who’s playing, but if you care you can find out here.
Meh…can’t say I rightfully give a shit.
Mark, if you need help packing, or an extra pickup to get you out of town quicker, just holla’.
Post-Valentine’s Day Vengeance
It’s all in the title, folks.
Sooooooooo…..tell me. What did you overlook? Why should you be worried right now?
I’ll tell you why…. Because you’re a stupid guy who doesn’t know shit about shit when it comes to women. Go look at those pictures up there again, only this time with the assumption you’ve fucked up and you’re gonna pay….eventually….
See what I mean?
Look, I know many of you think your girl is/was happy with your V-Day efforts. And some probably really are. But trust me, some are not. And some of you (you know who you are) totally tanked it and already know she’s gunning for you.
And that’s not even the worst part. Those situations can be somewhat predicted and/or mitigated. Or if all else fails…avoided (see ya in a couple weeks hon, I’m headed to Alaska to help tag water buffalo). No no, the worst part is all the girls out there who didn’t have boyfriends/dates for Valentine’s Day. They my friends, are the unpredictable X-factor this weekend.
But take heart because there could be a payoff if you’re also single yourself….
For you guys who are NOT single, go home right now and do something nice for YOUR gal in case she’s pissed. Hint: If she looks like this she probably is….
So how does one spot the Post-Valentine’s Anger? Well, it’s really nothing new. You’ve been seeing it since you were in grade school. You just never noticed (or cared) because you’re a guy. But remember this young lady? The one who sat behind you in fourth grade who didn’t get a Valentine from you and proceeded to kick your chair all day every day for 2 weeks?
Well, she grew up to be this girl, who now lives 3 doors down from you….
She also now owns a car and has a SHITLOAD more estrogen coursing thru her veins….
So as you can see, it’s important to not only spot her, but to know what type she is.
Is she a Screamer? This we can live with.
Same with the Screamer/Gesturer. No imminent risk, just walk away.
The Hitter is to be respected, but really all ya gotta do is stay more than four feet away and be ready to move just in case….
But the Thrower, on the other hand, while not one to necessarily fear per se…..well, let’s just say don’t turn your back on her and back away slowly….
But weapons change the game. As is true with so many things, I suppose.
The Stabber is serious business of course, but really the defense is just Hitter/Thrower combined. Keep your distance and don’t turn your back.
Which brings us to the Shooter. Now you don’t need me to tell you that if this is your view….
You’re pretty much dead already. But at least that’s the last thing you’ll see. You can go to your grave knowing that others have done worse.
But if you’ve got some distance (and also are not trapped in a hallway choke point, of course), you’ve got a shot. In such a scenario, I do highly recommend the Babou defense until you find some cover….
It’s important to remember that where a girl lands on the scale between Screamer and Shooter depends upon a great many factors. Said level also frequently escalates, but rarely de-escalates. This seems simple enough, but it is important. If she pulled a knife on you once…..
Also….If it’s YOUR girl coming at you with weapons, my guess is either you’ve really fucked up or she’s crazy. Or both. Knowing you guys, almost definitely both.
Also very important to remember is that weapons can be hidden…
So if in doubt, frisk yo’ girl and act like it’s foreplay (and who knows? Maybe it is).
So if you’re out and about this weekend and you encounter a girl who looks like these, be wary of your surroundings on par with the above scale. Watch for weapons, of course.
But if YOUR girl looks like THESE….????
Where was I? Oh yeah….if YOUR girl is pissed at you?
Talk to her.
Trust me, she wants you to talk to her. And if you ever want to see this again….
And if you don’t want Easter to look like this…..
Just keep trying…..Because you want this next Christmas…..
If all else fails and she won’t talk to you, suggest Sexy Boxing.
(meh, it was worth a shot)
((at least now she’s laughing))
This week’s tWBS original is a very special selection. Firstly, I love the Moon, and photograph it often, trying to get better at doing so. But truth be told, it’s rare that I get a shot of the Moon that I find remarkable in one way or another. Seen one Moon Pic (no not that kind) seen ’em all.
But occasionally, circumstance/timing and weather can change that. Anywhoo, captured on a cold January night in ’15, it’s a little over two years old.
It’s entitled -Mama Quilla- which is significant both to this entry (LOL) as well as to something which will be upcoming (I hope) from Mr. ballsofsteelandfury and myself…though only he’ll get that joke for now. But I give you the Incan Moon Goddess of Female Menstrual Cycles…..sooooooo…..WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
*Additional special hat tip to Mr. balls for his suggestion for this week’s TGISF theme. I was floundering for some reason or another this week. 😉
Hmmmm, I haven’t given you any depressing music to listen to yet, have I? That can’t be right, can it? Well, you’re not getting any, either. Time to be happy whether we like it or not….
Have a good weekend, folks.