Thanks to Beerguyrob, I know a ton about what happened in relation to players getting signed and tagged. This, of course, brings up some…. questions. 25 to be exact.
1- Is anyone else surprised that Goodell did not fine James Harrison $50,000 for signing an extension with the Steelers?
2- Or is Goodell simply enjoying the fact he has two more years of fining ahead of him?
3- Since LeVeon Bell got tagged by the Steelers, does that mean he’ll be happy or pissed?
4- Wait, wasn’t I a “former” fan?
5- Why do I care about Antonio Brown extending and Bell tagging and Harrison resigning?
6- Jesus, is this a relapse?
7- Or is it more like when you have sex with your ex?
8- Like, you’re still broken up, but she does that thing you really like and you just can’t help yourself?
9- I’m going to feel like shit in the morning, aren’t I?
10- Am I a bad person for doing this?
11- Can you blame me, though?
12- If you had your ex naked in front of you wearing those matching Bell Brown stiletto heels and that Harrison hat, would you be able to resist?
13- In this scenario, does that make my penis Big Ben?
14- Considering the results of our commentist survey, do you think the majority of us have grey pubes?
15- At that point, isn’t it better just to shave them off?
16- More appealing for the ladies, amirite ladies?
17- Speaking of ladies, did you know the Steelers do not have cheerleaders?
18- And that their owners are hypocritical assholes?
19- Am I doing this to remember why I broke up with them in the first place?
20- Was that a rhetorical question?
21- Isn’t it good that least I wasn’t a Jaguras or Jets fan?
22- Wouldn’t that be like going back for sex to your ex that doesn’t shave her pits, has gained too much weight, and has taken up crack?
23- Or would the Jaguras be meth?
24 The Browns would be Krokodil, wouldn’t they?
25- At that point, wouldn’t it just be easier to kill yourself?