YAXKIN MULUK, 900 BC – GRAND TEMPLE – INTERIOR
[The HIGH PRIEST stands before a glorious golden altar leading his congregation of hundreds in prayer. The square-shaped room is massive, with high ceilings and an opening at the very center showing sunny powder blue skies above. An entryway at the far end looks directly at the side of a high mountain, obstructing most light from that direction. Ghastly stone statues of serpents, sea creatures and dogs line the the walls and stare ominously at the crowd as they bob, weave and chant in unison with their leader.]
HIGH PRIEST: Ilhuicahua! Ilhuicahua! Quimoteotia! Teotl Tlaelquiyahuitl! Xiccaqui tlatlatlauhtiliztlatolli! Tlaloc! Xolotl! Cocijo!
[As the HIGH PRIEST continues, the skies above begin to darken. Distant thunder rumbles and although barely audible outside, the walls of the temple cause the sound to resonate within. As the chants continue, a YOUNG BOY appears before the entry way and begins running towards the altar, carrying a large satchel in both hands.]
YOUNG BOY: Teyacanani! Teyacanani!
[The HIGH PRIEST stops his chant and looks at the YOUNG BOY with a rye smile. All members of the congregation turn their heads in unison to face him as he travels through their midst. Some scowl, but most expressions remain blank as a hushed silence falls over the room.]
YOUNG BOY: Teyacanani. Motta! Nichuicaz amoxtli teootl!
[The YOUNG BOY hands the satchel to the HIGH PRIEST, who runs his hands over it with a quizzical expression. He begins to undo the binding to find a book, bound in hard black leather. The words De Vermis Mysteriis are the only markings on the exterior of the tome, written in blood red lettering across the cover.]
HIGH PRIEST: [Muttering] Izca… [His arms and the book shoot up, presenting the tome to the congregation] IZCA!!!
[The congregation roars in triumph, their feet stomp the floor and their hands clap in unexpected unison. The HIGH PRIEST motions for the YOUNG BOY to lie upon the golden altar before him, and with a look of sheer joy he complies.]
HIGH PRIEST: Toteucyohuane…
[The HIGH PRIEST lays the book upon the altar next to the YOUNG BOY and as he opens it, a bolt of lightning streaks across the sky, visible through the opening above. After carefully turning the pages with the utmost reverence, the HIGH PRIEST stops when he finds what he is looking for: A detailed drawing of darkened figure, his hands skyward, seemingly harnessing lightning from the clouds above, while a throng of people surround him in worship. The HIGH PRIEST runs his finger along the text below the image, attempting to put them together in his mind. Believing his translation complete, with the exception of one phrase, he pulls a ceremonial dagger from his waist, raises it above the YOUNG BOY and begins to call to his congregation.]
HIGH PRIEST:
Y’AI’NG’NGAH
TLATLATZINILIZTLI
H’EE-L’GEB
F’AI THRODOG
UAAAH
[Upon finishing the words, the HIGH PRIEST thrusts the dagger downward, but is stopped by a sudden blinding light that engulfs the whole room. As he blinks to regain his sight, a portal appears in the wall behind him. Awestruck, the congregation gasps, then falls to their knees in worship. The HIGH PRIEST turns, then drops his dagger to the floor in surprise.]
HIGH PRIEST: Inon…?
[Tentacles begin to creep from the portal. Startled, but remaining still, the HIGH PRIEST looks on as they come closer and closer.]
[They reach the alter and after brushing against the arm of the YOUNG BOY, stop. The HIGH PRIEST looks around nervously, and as realization strikes, reaches down to retrieve his dagger. His hand unexpectedly bumps into one of the now many tentacles that surround him, which springs to life and wraps around his wrist. The others wriggle forth and begin to grab onto his other limbs, torso and neck, pulling him back towards the portal. The YOUNG BOY sits up and watches.]
YOUNG BOY: [Crestfallen] Pepenaloya…
HIGH PRIEST: Ahmotsin… [Panicking] AHMOTSIN! NECHCUAZNEQUIZ! XINECHMICTI!
[The congregation stares on in awed silence as the HIGH PRIEST breaks the plain of the portal and disappears from sight. A bloodcurdling scream is heard from beyond the veil, then cut short. However, the grisly sound reverberates throughout the chamber, drowned out moments later by another roll of thunder, much louder that before. As the sound dies, the members of the congregation begin to look at one another uneasily.]
YOUNG BOY: Huallaz?
[A FIGURE emerges from the portal, which closes immediately behind him. Cloaked in shadows, his features remain concealed as he makes his way forward; a trail of dark liquid pooling behind him with each step. As he approaches the altar, another lightning bolt splits the sky above and illuminates the chamber. That’s when the screaming started.]
GRAND TEMPLE – EXTERIOR
[The congregation begins to pour from the narrow exit like locusts. Members fall down stories at a time as they quickly try to descend the steep stone steps. Others trip over their remains and are quickly trampled by those behind them. Maniacal laughter spills out from within the temple above, causing some to simply jump to their doom, while others stop in place, clutch their heads in agony and beg for release. As the noise increases, the mountain adjacent to the structure begins to rumble. Large rocks and boulders begin to cascade down the sides, landing on and crushing the unfortunate. With a final roaring clap of thunder, the mountain gives way and envelops the temple in mud, rock and shale. As the dust settles, the wind dies down and the sun begins to peak out from beyond the clouds. There is silence.]
PRESENT DAY (JULY 26th, 1967) – SAN DIEGO STADIUM CONSTRUCTION SITE – SUB-BASEMENT INTERIOR
[The FOREMAN sits pouring over a blueprint on a makeshift table in the underground’s dim light. A brand new portable radio sits on the far end, playing the latest hit by the Bee Gees occasionally cutting out from the interference. There is the sound of a pipe bursting in the next room, followed by yelling from the crew.]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2fBXpub9U4
FOREMAN: No no no! [Running towards the sound of the commotion] You bunch of idiots! We have less than a month to finish this damn thing! Eugene Klein told me if we’re not ready for the opener against those sissy Patriots, he’ll enlist the lot of you and ship you straight to ‘Nam! [Disappears down the long hallway]
[2 men remain working nearby on a contraption out of place amongst the rest of the building.]
ENGINEER: So, did the Foreman ever tell you why Mayor Curran wants a hidden room in the basement of the stadium?
ELECTRICIAN: No, and I didn’t ask. It’s probably where he’ll be dumping all the detractors to his little taxi scam. But can you believe it? We’re working on the home of the Chargers! John Hadl will take the field above us in a few weeks and lead the boys to victory! They will fire the cannon, sound the charge and get the home crowd bringing the thunder! It gives me goosebumps just thinking about it!
ENGINEER: Dan, that’s great and all, but I don’t really care until the Silver and Black come down the 5 to teach them a thing or two about legacy.
[Just then there is the sound of something like another pipe bursting, but it comes from beyond the wall where the two men are working. Then it happens, again and again, in rhythm.]
ENGINEER: What the hell is that? Did the pressure get turned on too high again?
ELECTRICIAN: No, I don’t think so. It sounds like… a drum beat?
[The sound comes again and again, as the wall crumbles apart, exposing a hole to a chamber beyond.]
ENGINEER: Whoa. That’s not on the blueprint!
[The men cast their lights into hole to find a massive room, seemingly untouched for millennia. Vines, dust and mold cover the walls and thick piles of dirt and rock coat the floor. They start to wander into the room and examine things more closely.]
ELECTRICIAN: This is so cool! The statues look Aztecian if I’m not mistaken. But that can’t be. They never got this far North.
ENGINEER: [Pointing] There’s something over there that’s catching my light.
[The two wander over and dust off a white object, oddly untouched from the damage and decay of the rest of the room]
ELECTRICIAN: Is that… human?
ENGINEER: [Worried] I don’t like this. I think we should go!
???: GO WHERE?!
[The ENGINEER whirls around, finding himself face to face with a massive FIGURE.]
FIGURE: THIS ONE IS UNWORTHY OF MY POWER!
[There is a flash of movement followed by a sickening thud and the ENGINEER crumples in a heap to the floor.]
ELECTRICIAN: Oh my god!!
FIGURE: [Now looming over the ELECTRICIAN] AHHHH, THIS VESSEL UNDERSTANDS WORSHIP! [Placing a bloodied hand on the ELECTRICIAN’S head] AND HAS KNOWLEDGE OF THE MOST ELECTRIFYING KIND!
ELECTRICIAN: [Paralyzed and shaking in fear] Whu-whu-what a-a-re–
FIGURE: POWER! SALVATION! AND SOON, YOU!
[The ELECTRICIAN screams as the room goes completely dark.]
[10 minutes later, just outside…]
FOREMAN: [Soaking wet and walking back to his table] What a mess. [Glancing over to see the back of the ELECTRICIAN, playing with the now operational door] At least somebody knows what they’re doing. Nice work, Dan!
ELECTRICIAN: [Turning around] DAN IS EXALTED!
FOREMAN: Uh, alright… [Looking closer at his face] Are you okay? You look, a little sick, and, cripes, are you bleeding?!
ELECTRICIAN: DAN HAS NEVER BEEN BETTER! ANY BLOOD FROM DAN’S ORIFICES IS PART OF THE PROCESS! NOW BEGONE! THERE IS MUCH WORK TO DO BEFORE THE NEW TEMPLE IS CHRISTENED! OOOOOHHHHH YEEEEAAAAHHHHHH!
[Translation tool]
[Banner image via]
I smile a wry smile when I drink rye whiskey. Although there almost never is a HIGH PRIEST nor a YOUNG BOY involved in my drinking … almost never.
Words cannot express how much I love this, and how much I look forward to his extraction of his terrible, terrible vengeance.
I thought this was going to be a HRTN story about the other side of the DERP portal, well done
Is anyone else seeing the little green men under the avatars? I haven’t been drinking enough for this…
Yeah, I’m making an update. Check it out though, now you can see who liked your drunken rants!
I think I’m now happy that security ran me out of Qualcomm that night (back in ’67…yeah).
Whew!!!!!!
I can’t believe I’ve had this site since the 60’s. I don’t feel a day over 39.
“Tell me about it! Always nice to meet a fellow member of the Chargers’ ‘Blood for Youth’ initiative.”
– Peter Thiel
I had no idea throwback week would become origin week!
Dare I hold out for the Zimmer prequel?!
I call Bennigans. No way a gringo could recognize Aztec statues in 1967.
I’m assuming the IBEW wouldn’t have allowed any Mexicans back then.
See DC, this is how you do an Origin story!