Your “How Many Starters Can You Name?” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News:

  • Jay Cutler wasted no time putting his scent all over the Hard Rock Stadium litter box by purchasing the #6 from previous owner Brandon Doughty.
    • Terms weren’t disclosed, but amongst teammates I’m guessing Doughty won’t be paying for meal upgrades above the per diem on the road this season.
  • The NFL has hired 24 full-time game officials for the 2017 season. The chosen will be selected from the current crop of 124 total officials.
    • A theory comes in that because of the looming Vegas move and legalization of sports gaming means having full-time employees can offset the complaint that part-timers are affecting game (and thus betting) outcomes.
  • Roger Goodell has now officially put on record that he wants a shorter pre-season.
    • He accepts that changes would have to come through collective bargaining.
    • No doubt he’s observed the CFL’s 18-2 game season structure, and lusts to charge regular-season prices for otherwise garbage games.

Attention to all of you living in the western Canada Costco distribution area:


Game Preview: Texans vs. Panthers

  1. No Cam Newton. But yes to Christian McCaffrey.
  2. Probably no J.J. Watt. No word on delicate flower Jadeveon Clowney.
  3. The Texans’ depth chart at QB is
    1. Tom Savage
    2. Brandon Weeden
    3. DeShaun Watson

So, I wouldn’t expect to see Watson tonight, unless Weeden is a whole new form of horrible.

(Ron Howard voice: “Brandon Weeden discovered a whole new level of horrible”.)

They’ll start Savage & let him go for a quarter at least. Same for Carolina, with Derek Anderson starting and then both Joe Webb & Garrett Gilbert getting game time so Riverboat Ron can see who his #3 will be this season.

I wonder which Texan is going to see if McCaffrey runs routes with his head down?

It might be passably watchable for the first half, but by the 4th quarter you’ll be seeing guys who’ll be starting in Hamilton by October 1 out on the field. I expect energetic late-evening comments about quality of play.

Hat tips to the Battle Red Blog & Cat Scratch Reader for confirming what I already knew.


Tonight’s sports:

  • Football:
    • Texans at Panthers – 7:30PM | NFL Network
  • Beisbol:
    • MLB:
      • Red Sox at Rays – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN2
      • Yankees at Blue Jays – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Little League Baseball:
      • Southwest Regional final – 7:00PM | ESPN2

Finally, a shout-out to commentist , whom I met at Nat Bailey last night. Delightful to meet him; hates Australians almost as much as me. He was confused by the “spilled” free beers he was receiving. To steal his line – WEIRDEST TINDER DATE EVAR!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Unsurprised

g’nite

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Wakezilla

Speaking of videos, a friend of mine just directed this Billy Talent video. The video isn’t shabby, but the song sounds like every Billy Talent song ever.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaNpka54DqQ

Wakezilla

Here’s a fun guilty pleasure song (video is also fun)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bsUWK-fixiA

Unsurprised

Good eye, Brick. I guess that’s why they made you a pilot.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Brick admires his suggestion, crashes plane.
NTSB rules it mechanical failure.

Unsurprised

Goddamn dick jokes strike again.

Wakezilla

#29 got a penalty for roughing the passer, didn’t he?

Unsurprised

Bang bang !

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Unsurprised

Not sure I buy her as a CIA paramilitary killer, but I’m down for whatever has her wearing yoga pants like that.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Brick, just curious. What make model did you first learn on?
Piper Cherokee, here.

Also, semi-related….I still want to somehow one day find a way to get a surplus A10 Warthog. Love those fuckers.

(also a Bell UH-1 rotary….no I don’t have my license for those but fuck it)

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Shit, fuck you tiny pic above….
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Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

If you click that, it’s huge. I forgot to add text and now I can’t edit this in. Anyway, always look for that Pinterest URl.

theeWeeBabySeamus

What text you want in? I can put it in for ya. I think.

Unsurprised

Never mind. I’m just trying to say that if you click that image of the A-10, you’ll get the original (huge) version of it.

Mr. Ayo
theeWeeBabySeamus

For the first time in months, I can finally hear these guys without crying.
This is progress.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o2fTAQ_bKuU

Unsurprised

Font 1: Copperplate

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Font 2: Geneva

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Mr. Ayo

Just do Impact already.

Unsurprised

Fuck you.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Mr. Ayo

Choice of font is an hilarious point of conflict among designers. No one else gives a shit but them.

Unsurprised

I’m not even a designer; I’m just an asshole.

Mr. Ayo

This checks out.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

This is true. Comic sans has been known to lead to bloodshed and the destruction of entire graphics firms.

Brick Meathook

Futura, all caps, 90% white, 50% drop shadow with a little blur. And lose the outlines.

Unsurprised

I like this. Outlines are easier to make, but drop shadow is probably better.

Also, today I’ve been messing with using teams’ color, but yeah, a lot of these combinations are nearly unreadable.

Mr. Ayo

It’s 3am somewhere.

Wakezilla

It’s the Indigenous basketball championships at UBC. I went to the opening ceremonies yesterday. It was pretty good (though the basketball was pretty meh)

Sadly, none of the costumes did not look like this.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m allergic to birds/feathers. 2/10…would not bang.

(all of that’s a lie, would wreck this chick given the chance)

Unsurprised

I don’t think she’s Native.

I definitely don’t care, though.

Romonobyl

Nope, I wouldn’t have any reservations either.

OK OK…I’ll leave.

Mr. Ayo

That’s good for at least three sessions. Tonight.

Mr. Ayo

UPDATE!
Attempting to get one for the thumb!

Brick Meathook

So… they all looked like that?

Mr. Ayo

Not the ones we left.

Unsurprised

Back in Yakut/Siberia, before they crossed the Bering Land Bridge.

Romonobyl

I wonder if Barry White knows how many children he has created by proxy?

Unsurprised

Did everyone else see this?

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Wakezilla

“I told you to trim your sideburns. You’re fucking fired. Congrats on winning the Super bowl, commie pinko”

Mr. Ayo

“Also, It wouldn’t hurt to lose some weight, tubby. Now, who wants some pork?”

blackroseMD1

Keenan Allen seems to have a pretty good shot at a WWE career after his football days are over. Also, whoever came up with the “Fight for L.A.” bullshit needs to be taken out back and shot.

https://twitter.com/BluMambaSports/status/895440013730627585

Unsurprised