The Cowboys/Broncos tilt is far and away the best game available here but I might sneak in some Jets/Raiders action when no one is looking. TO THE GAMES!
Mia/LAC: The Fins finally get a game under their collective belts and I can stuff some Ajayi into my lineup. The Clips lost pg Chris Paul and it showed last week. The good news is that te Blake Griffin was signed in the off-season and continues his stand out play. Did you know that he once played basketball? I’m surprised that announcers haven’t pointed that out very often.
NYJ/Oak: The Jets get to travel all the way out to the west coast to pick up their second L of this young season when they could be doing the very same thing much closer to home and those that pretend to love them. Damn you, NFL schedule-makers! Not going to lie-I’m thinking seriously of taking a year off work and coming back where I left off. I call it “The Lynch Stratagem”.
Dal/Den: Is the Broncs run D improved enough to limit Zeke to under 100 yards? Melvin Gordon and his 3 yards a carry nods knowingly. It seems as though Dez struggles mightily against above average cb’s and that’s where Chris Harris comes in. And don’t kid yourself, the Cowboys D is not nearly as dominant as it seemed against the [spits on ground] Giants O. Denver in a squeaker?
Was/LAR: The biggest surprise last week had to be the way the Rams blew the doors off the Colts. It’s very strange to see a perennial also-ran step on the throat of another team and refuse to let them back up. Goff and Kupp impressed but the jury is still out on rb Gurley, what with that whole 19 carries for 40 yards albatross around his neck.
SF/Sea: The only way the Niners have a puncher’s chance at this one is to feed rb Hyde far more than the measly 15 times they did last week against Carolina. There’s just so much more talent wearing the green and whatever.
Get with the typing, fellas.
You stupid cow-fucking moron you!
If Parker was Eldelman or Gronk, there would have been a PI call there.
Holy shit I just realized I’ve been watching Jay Cutler
Trevor has to learn to cut his losses
“I know, right?”
– Ray Lewis
How the hell does DirecTV have higher customer satisfaction than cable? They’re seriously one of the most unethical companies I’ve ever had the displeasure of interacting with. Cable ain’t great, but I’ve at least had some customer service interactions with cable that I didn’t feel like suing after
Hurt Donk bring out the cart.
STOP SCORING RUSHING TOUCHDOWNS YOU NON-MARSHAWN LYNCH MOTHERFUCKERS
It’s still Beerguyrob 7, Seahawks 6, 49ers 6.
Let’s see you kick that field goal.
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!!!! v. Tomsulas, Game of the Century. Mandatory Commentist Party viewing.
Meanwhile, the original Tomsulas are still making a game of it against the HEAUX.
Nate Allen showing why he’s on defense and not a wideout.
Guess you lucky fucks will get to put up with me full time for a few weeks. Having knee surgery Friday followed by lots o’ fun filled physical therapy. Torn meniscus, likely caused during the Harvey evac fiasco. Good times.
So are you gonna get a FEMA check or an ICE raid?
Well, Ice does help.
I am deadly fucking serious: if you want one of my open thread nights, let me know.
It’s a thought.
You can get some pointers from yeah right
Me: Doc, I don’t recall actually hurting my knee, it just got sore.
Doc: How old are you?
Me: 53
Doc: That’s how you hurt your knee.
Sounds like a lot of painkillers! In all seriousness, it’s a bitch of an injury, but the rehab (normally) isn’t nearly as bad as you’d think.
Come on, Trevor- make a mistake.
About half Dolphins fans here I guess. The seat color disguises the empties.
Man, that place really is tiny
Hey, high school budgets are pretty tight these days, ppl forget that.
a Texas high school would be ashamed of that, though
It’s not a bad idea to make the place/team seem to be in demand.
Did the Chargers get an excessive celebration penalty for that pile after Gates’s record?
Oh my fucking god. There’s been about 20 minutes of commercials for like 1 minute of play. The Clippers really are a basketball team
thump thump DEE-FENSE!! thump thump
Serious question, how has Dallas managed not to ruin Dak when Romo was pretty much playing through serious injuries every year?
BECAUSE HE’S A GODAMMM STAR YEEEEEHHAHAAAAAA!!!!!!
DAK! is MOAR ATHLETIC duh
I haven’t seen Frank Clark hit someone that hard since Diamond Hurt.
DAK DAK DAK
“How many Dak’s is that?”
X!
Could we please get a little more RAMMIT competence ?
Goddamn people with three letter names starting with ‘D’
Damn.
X
In honor of Beef Moe I am going to take a steak out of the freezer.
TEEE DEEEEEE!!!!
you’ll get 3 Zeke failures, a FG, and LOVE IT!
why is DAK! so good?
That pass was on a laser.
incredibly difficult throw
Nice to see Tunsil’s password protection is still as bad his pass blocking. Catler lost a life there.
Cutler couldn’t possibly be any more of a spectator when he hands off the ball if he started screaming something racist and overpaid for shit food
Garrett has a pretty nice rack.
Can we get another weather delay please?
Fuck yes!!!
hey maybe the Bears should have invested in those “offensive lineman”
The Denver Dumb Bums.
Raiders taking their vulture game to a whole new level.
goddamnit, Trevor
You sound like a disappointed parent.
“How many times have I told you to make your bed?”
The Seahawks are playing very bad. I am very drunk. Advantage Beerguyrob.
“OMAHA!”
Yes THAT’S what I fucking wanted to see. A rushing touchdown by fucking Cordarelle fucking Patterson. Goddamnit, beef moe, get your shit together.
Luke-warm take: Gotham would be better if it was only 10-12 episodes a season.
Scorching hot take: No. Its just bad.
Holy shit, that’s a….. iffy call.
Buster Skrine continues to suck!? What an entirely unexpected development!
His name however, still does suck.
It’s right there in the first four letters. How did they miss that?
What the fuck does the anniversary of 9/11 matter when Oakland Raiders go out to help children?
Honest to God if you don’t live in the immediate NYC area, it didn’t “affect you”, fuck off. I understand why there’s a 9/11 Museum but I will never go to it.
Well, we need something to dwell on for nearly two decades without unironic self-reflection.
Well, there are all those people who served in Iraq or Afghanistan who would have just stayed at home without 9/11
If it makes you feel any better, offspring of soldiers who fought in Afghanistan after 9/11, are now being stationed in Afghanistan.
Is Prescott trying to paralyze himself?
DAK?
Hmmmm…
THIS SEA/NINERS GAME, I CALL IT GERALD’S GAME BECAUSE IT’S ALL TIED UP AND THE FUTURE LOOKS HOPELESS.
Damn it I picked Seatruthers as my Suicide pick.
When you say “Let’s Go” that’s a contraction for “Let Us Go” right? That’s kinda creepy.
LET US GO, TEAM, PLEASE, WE WANT TO GO HOME
Did you stop at a dispensary recently?
An alternate title for that show “Bull” would be “Smug”.
Goodell will spend this coming offseason demanding that every open air stadium be retrofitted with a retractable roof to avoid weather delays. He will insist the $200 mil per city in taxpayer money needed to do this is “necessary due to the immense importance we place on the safety of our fans”.
“And if you don’t do it, we’re moving your team to Los Angeles. We’ll move ALLLLLLL the teams to Los Angeles!”
Weather delay? Colorado?
Bet more than a few players went out to the parking lot and came back all relaxed and eye-bloodshotty.
still not letting Perine play? Did he make fun of Snyder’s height?
Who has the smaller crowd? Rammit or Clippers?
is it sadder that Rammit has the NFL logo on their field? I say yes