I don’t get hung over very much anymore but when you go thru the stress of an Eggpocalypse, the usual college footballing and a Cuse/Kansas game, sometimes the excessive imbibing catches up to you. No matter, today is a new day and somebody has to get back on that horse and it might as well be yours truly. TO THE GAMES!
CLE/LAC: The Chargers O is on fire right now but Josh Gordon is back. Finally! I wonder what took him so long. Oh, right. Wr Allen is averaging a stunning 165 yards over his last two and I can’t see him being stopped by them Browns. The LawnClippers are actually the only team that Cleveland has beaten in the last two years but lightning won’t be striking twice today.
NYG/OAK: Try to hold down your dinner if you’re watching this travesty. Both Crabtree and Cooper are out again and the Giants haven’t been able to cover the tight end spot for a few years now. What does this mean to you? Well, if you’re waffling about inserting Jared Cook into your fantasy lineup just go ahead and move on to something else. Will the Geno Smith Era last all of the rest of the season? The smart money is pushing people out of the way in order to get to the betting window and put all its money on the under. Btw, sources tell ESPN that McAdoo is gone within 24 hours of this upcoming loss.
CAR/NO: Two 8-3 teams have at it for the NFC South lead. Congrats to you if you drafted Kamara Chameleon back in the fall. He comes and goes up and down the field. He comes and goes. You may want to strain your shoulder giving yourself a pat on the back for that one. You see, you’re old-you can’t be doing that sort of thing at your age.
LAR/ARI: Third string qb Gabby Gabbert gets another start for the Cards who have been devastated by the ouchie bug. He’ll be throwing to the likes of Ricky Seals-Jones, Chad Williams and Carlton Agudosi. Who? After halting the Saints 8 gamewin streak, the Rams just might be onto something. Qb Goff is gulping some rarified air these days. Over his last 4 games his TD/INT numbers are 9-1. Notbad for a feller that was written off last year.
Get at ‘er!
You let Gabbert do that? Really Wade?
Being sick sucks. I went outside today to rake the front and back lawn of my pitifully small kingdom and then took a two hour nap. I woke up to find the Ravens had scored 40+ points, so apparently I’m in the midst of some fever induced dream.
Good Cam. Bad Ram
TD Fitz for Cardinals.
TD MCCraffrey!
2nd and 1 for the Giants. Will they run the most unimaginative play ever? Yes they will. Will they go 3 and out yet again? Yes they will.
Mike Shula fucking sucks.
NSFW, but holy fucking God this is hot.
h
ttps://gfycat.com/ClumsyPinkKarakul
That’s one happy backup QB.
I’m helping the middle Fozz Spawn study for a math test. That’s like having Tom Brady go shopping by himself at Sam’s Club.
I fear being asked for homework help when it comes to math.
Even things I recall, I cannot explain why/how I know them. I just does.
Raiders have no receivers.
the Giants are TRYING to give this fucker away. To the punitive AFC West leader.
The DFO parlay is very much in favor of this.
You non-recluses want to ruin the mighty Hippo 8-for-8??
that would include 3 moneylines, including a 9.5-point dog.
I can’t have fucking anything can I?
NO Gordon NO Henry!!!
/whammies are fine
Eli is wondering if he has finished up all his christmas shopping yet.
Melvin Gordon is an asshole.
Don’t be too hard on Geno-you a Giants qb, you gonna turn the ball over. That’s just the way it is.
This Under Siege reboot is creamier than I remember.
45% MOAR ball tickling!
It would be higher, but there’s less autofellatio without Seagal
why doesn’t AZ just kick the FG whilst they can?
QUADBOX!
This Honey I shrunk the kids reboot with Matt damon looks ok. I hope Rick Moranis make a appearance.
With Geno’s steadfast leadership, all of a sudden Hippo’s 8-for-8 es posible!!
awwwww fuck
Eli has decided to read his Harry Potter book. Mom isn’t around, she says they are evil.
I just assumed Archie thought they were too queer.
it can be two things
Eli has run into more brick pillars at train stations than you can imagine.
WHAT?!?!
THE BROWNS ARE ALLOWED TO SCORE A PASSING TD?!?!
THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING!!!
#ThePauls @ Shitty Clippers is some real through the looking glass shit, man. EXPECT EVERYTHING
#ThePauls into the lead!!
Insurmountable!
if the blue tent is a rockin don’t come knocking.
Rocking can’t be good for someone with a possible concussion.
Josh Gordon, still good, and prolly high
Rams defense got me feeling like….
That tongue on the second one from the left! Where’s my jar of peanut butter?
Gene Simmons’ dog.
Lousy pizza is on its way! YAY!
Papa John’s to the rescue?
Toppers is a very small chain up here and the only game in my stupid small town.
Still better than PJ
NAWT wisconsin Toppers.
Can Shula please take one of the college head coach jobs?
as we were saying, that Geno is just a winner
DARKWINGDOWN!
Wait. Now I lost track. Who’s Darkwing Duck?
Orleans Darkwa
Ah.
Never heard of him, I’ve heard of him, but can’t remember anything about him, but it makes sense.That makes sense.
Orleans Darkwa. rb for the stinking G-men.
Didn’t that dude used to be on Numb3rs as Dr. Fleischman’s FBI partner?
Did Joe Buck just call it the AL West?
i may experience RAMMMIT for 2-3 hours today.
Make sure you stretch!
RRRAAAMMMMIIITTT
YEAH!!!
Oh NOOOOOO!
Baby buster threw INT!!!!
Eli is wondering if he can get some gatorade or is just for the guys playing.
Olivia packed him a Transformers lunchbox with juice boxes, orange slices and a new coloring book.
Ohh! Sunny D!?!
Eli is wondering if he will be able to try some of that world famous Napa Valley wine while he is in San Francisco.
https://gfycat.com/WildImprobableAidi
3-0 Chargers…insurmountable lead….
Eli is really excited that he got a free bag for being one of the first 5 000 spectators.
ahahahahaha
I have a family friend who raises cattle, so I have come to hate prairie dogs by osmosis.
If the Panther Defense were to decapitate Brees, i wouldn’t be mad.
Eli is wondering if he’s allowed to have a hot dog on the bench.
No. It’ll ruin his dinner later.
“Olivia? I was good all week!”
MOOOooooOOOooOoOoOoOoOOooooooOOOMMMMMMMMMMM
Hahahaha. New game lets play eli is wondering.
Eli is wondering if he can check his phone to see his Fantasy football team score.
Eli is wondering what id would be like to party or hangout with Marshan Lynch. Eli thinks Marshon is a cool guy.
“3 AND OUT! 3 AND OUT! 3 AND OUT!”
-Giants Cheerleaders, if the team bothered to have them
The LA Chargers uniforms look like the uniforms they use in movies for fake teams because the studio doesn’t want to pay the NFL for the rights….
They Might Not Be Giants (smh)
Wow.
24 drives without a TD for the Giants.
BABY BUSTER WOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
/this Gurley blocking thing is bullshit tho
King real quick who is Baby Buster?
Jared Goff
Cool glad to know. Also props with the nickname.