Your “Bloody Hell Guys – Wait For The Actual Day” Saturday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

Possibly because they don’t want their news to get lost in all the March Madness madness, events started unfolding quite quickly on the proposed trade front this weekend. Since 5:00ET Friday, in no particular order:

Which adds up to these hagiographic, yet laughable, ‘reimaginings’ of Sashi Brown’s time running the Browns, the Jets suddenly having the most cap space available ($92 million), this sober reminder of failures past,

and this nugget:

And the Browns still have most of their upper-round picks. Dare I say, strategic?

Oh, and Sean McDonough has decided to quit the Monday Night booth & go back to college games. He’s being replaced by someone named Joe Tessitore.


Tonight’s sports:

  • Hockey:
    • NHL:
      • Penguins at Leafs – 7:00PM | CBC / NHLN
      • Wild at Oilers – 10:00PM | CBC
    • NCAA:
      • Penn State at Notre Dame – 5:30PM | ESPNU
        • the “Don’t Touch Me!” Classic
  • NBA:
    • Spurs at Thunder – 8:30PM | ABC
    • Cavs at Lakers – 9:00PM | TSN5
  • NCAA:
    • Tournament Championships:
      • Big 12 – 6:00PM | ESPN
      • Mountain West – 6:00PM | CBS
      • Big East – 6:30PM | FOX
      • MAC – 7:00PM | ESPN2
      • Big Sky – 8:00PM | ESPNU
      • ACC – 8:30PM | ESPN
      • Southland – 9:00PM | ESPN2
      • Pac-12 – 10:00PM | FS1
      • WAC – 10:00PM | ESPNU
  • PyeongChang 2018
    • Paralympic Games – 10:00PM | NBCSN

As Seamus said on Friday, it’s a Whole Lotta Hippo for the next week.

HOPE YOU CAN HANDLE IT!

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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WakezillaWCSSenor WeaseloBrick MeathookMr. Ayo Recent comment authors
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WCS

Protip: Daylight Savings in the fall is a godsend. Daylight Savings in the (late) winter can eat a sandbox of cat crap.

Senor Weaselo

So my daylight savings hobby is watching the clock turn, and normally I go for the one on the cable box but today I went for the little analog-looking clockface on the iPhone clock app. Yes, the hour hand jumped from 2 to 3.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Wakezilla

My hot taek that’ll never happen: The NFL draft should happen no later than 2 weeks after the combine.

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Did you just create a combine time loop?

Wakezilla

Lordy, that was a herp a derp

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

I still think the Browns should go defense for pick 1 and 4, but, if they go draft the back and then defense, that wouldn’t be so bad, either. Which means they’ll draft the back and a QB who will turn into Ryan Couch

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

I cannot wait for season 2 to make its way onto Netflix

yeah right

Keeping on theme.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

Never trust a junkie.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

San Onofre!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

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blaxabbath

Ok – MAYBE the Pac-12 should have ONE team in the tourney.

But not ASU.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

The Conference of Champions should be represented in the big dance.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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It’ll be fine, we’ll be A-O-K,

Gratliff

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

Surf it out Bro.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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blaxabbath

UA fans booing Larry Scott will never get old.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Reminds me of my latest STD test

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

God bless you Moose.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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herodotus450
herodotus450

George Lucas WISHES he could use that much green screen compositing.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Real guys go for real down to Mars girls.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Well, this is in my head again for no good reason:

theeWeeBabySeamus

I disagree. Good reason.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Heya

theeWeeBabySeamus

Greyhound don’t float on water.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

All sorts of minds think alike

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Obligatory

theeWeeBabySeamus

GODDAMMIT!!!!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

This scale is off. #1 is medium rare to medium.

You can’t call it rare if there’s no purple.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Meat graphics are not pedantic.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

MEDIUM RARE

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Or dipshits who completely miss the fucking joke.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

I’M NOT A MEAT GRAPHIC!

Senor Weaselo

Funny, I figure WCS would be the one to like them Pittsburgh rare.

Senor Weaselo

Gotta give props to a group that can rap in 11.

Senor Weaselo

Someone should probably help me.

yeah right

I think we should have a musical theme for specific days of the week.

I suggest thrash metal Saturday.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

yeah right

Now we’re talking.

Gratliff

I blame the endless availability of streaming video for my inability to lose hours browsing through webcomics. I don’t know if that’s good or bad, but I do occasionally miss stumbling on to gems like the first S*P

http://www.somethingpositive.net/sp12192001.shtml

BrettFavresColonoscopy

XKCD, explosm, smbc, and existential comics are a timesuck rabbithole for me.

Gratliff

I hope there is one day a proper replacement for XKCD so I can stop using stick figures to explain what I do at work

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Gratliff

As a follow-up, I did a full rebuild of my SCCM server 2 weeks ago, which was just tons of fun. The only person IN THE WORLD I found even DISCUSSING the error was on a German version of Technet. Love too run technical discussions through google translate and hope in vane.

Senor Weaselo

Still read xkcd and Questionable Content (meh), behind a little on Sam and Fuzzy but I read it in chunks, VG Cats doesn’t fucking update, and I miss Brawl in the Family. Oh, and I’ve been reading Lil’ Char and the Gang, which is exactly what it sounds like.

Gratliff

I did S*P, VG Cats, 8-Bit Theater, Mac Hall, and some others back in the day. Penny Arcade is the only one that I really kept up with after college. I never did XKCD regularly. It exists solely to give me shit to put up in my office. I did enjoy LFG back in my World of Warcraft days, but it got so far up its own ass. All I wanted was to watch Richard murder things gleefully. Holy shit this video’s 11 years old already.

herodotus450
herodotus450

Buying fresh bread makes me empathize with syphilis: it’s a race to get your job done before the mold shows up.

yeah right

You could make it at home?

Then it’s the same race afterwards but at least you have hot fresh bread for a day.

herodotus450
herodotus450

Yeah but usually they charge extra to come to your place.

yeah right
theeWeeBabySeamus

Fukk the world….let’s do butt seks.

Gratliff
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

LMFAO

herodotus450
herodotus450

Oilers now have both Pontus Aberg and Leon Draisatl on their roster. Are they trying to play hockey or convene an ecumenical council?

herodotus450
herodotus450

Whoa, did anyone else just have their account hiijacked by Dennis Miller? Weird.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“These liberals; reminds me of the relationship of Claudius and Agrippina the Younger.”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Holy shit; false analogy! Maybe mine is hit too.

herodotus450
herodotus450

Security around here is looser than Catherine the Great

Gratliff

On one hand, I feel like it takes a lot to really hold my attention in the era of prestige television. On the other, as long as Ash vs. Evil Dead keeps doing goofy campy shit while Bruce Campbell remains Bruce Campbell, I’ll never turn it off.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Who around here has ice for my knees?

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Do you mean “ice” or literal frozen water ice?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Well, we will deport the rest of you with your knees.

yeah right

I’m your huckleberry.
Need a device to roll out your IT band? Got that too.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Another movie they didn’t have to have a remake.

theeWeeBabySeamus

OMFG…THAT RIGHT THERE IS WHY NCSU SHOULD HAVE LEFT THE ACC WHEN IT HAD THE FUCKING CHANCE.

DUDE JUST FUCKING SAID THE ACC IS THE BEARER OF THE DUKE/U*NC RIVALRY.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT. THAT’S ALL THAT NEEDED TO BE SAID. UVA JUST WON THE CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIP, BUT LET’S BRING UP THE DOOK/U*NC BULLSHIT.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT. GOODNIGHT…GODBLESS.

Senor Weaselo

That’s beyond deep-throating to *tries to think logistically* …cannibalism?

theeWeeBabySeamus

I just left John Swofford a very angry voicemail.
Yes, I’m serious.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

I can’t wait to see how you respond when NCST gets the death penalty from the FBI probe and U*NC gets nothing.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’ve been expecting us to get the death penalty for their transgressions for years, no worries.

And I also knew the previous coach was dirty, so the subpoena is nothing surprising.

If we did dirty shit, we should get the hammer.

That doesn’t change the fact the Carolina had a premeditated system to keep its athletes eligible. They set it up, they had it in place, they used it to win championships and make money.

Then they managed to fucking lie about it….AND GET AWAY WITH IT!!!!!!

The NCAA and SACS should all burn in hell.

And that’s what I just told the ACC Commish on his voicemail. In a just world, he’ll burn in hell someday.

theeWeeBabySeamus

And you guys wonder why I want to go to Mars????

NO FUCKING PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

NOTHING WILL BE FIXED IN THIS LIFE OR DEATH MATTER UNLESS YOU GET ANGRIER!!!

theeWeeBabySeamus

I really just wanna go to Mars.
I’m tired of hating humanity. There’s no humanity there.

Win-win.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I guess for me, my reasons to hate humanity and what it has done and will do…… college athletics organizations are not even on the list.

But I am inspired by your anger.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Agreed. College athletics is just a symptom.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Gratliff

We can all learn a little bit from the MAGA chud who doesn’t get enough Jesus on his coffee cups in December

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

theeWeeBabySeamus

You dick. Hehehehehe.

Senor Weaselo

The Martians’ response?
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theeWeeBabySeamus

Hehehehe

Senor Weaselo

And that’s what I just told the ACC Commish on his voicemail.

I was going to ask who that guy you mentioned was.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Don’t get me started on that asshole.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

So the Mario Kart Google Maps Easter egg isn’t as cool as I thought. There’s no Mario Kart-playing on it.

Fronkenshteen

Arizona unis make everyone look like they got run over by a golf cart.

Senor Weaselo

I had nothing to do with it! Nothing, I tell ya!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Cry you Chapel Hill fuckers, cry.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Did they give you a bad touch?

theeWeeBabySeamus

They gave everyone a bad touch.
And got away with it.

Cheatingest fuckers in college athletics in EVAR. No penalties.

theeWeeBabySeamus

The University* of North Carolina is a blight on society.

It should be corrected. I’d do it myself, but I wouldn’t do well in prison. I’m too pretty.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Never fucking touched him. ACC, this officiating is shameful.
Shameful, I say.

And those cheating fuckers are still gonna lose.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

SonOfSpam

So I checked up top, and you didn’t mention the BIG WEST CHAMPIONSHIP GAME FEATURING MY UC IRVINE ANTEATERS (on ESPN2 at 9:00 PM Pacific Time).

You will pay.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

That’s technically a Sunday game. Check back in the morning open thread.

SonOfSpam

Nope. Eastern Time means nothing. And only what I want matters.

(Sorry, just went conservative for a moment. Won’t happen again.)

blaxabbath

Sean Miller kinda smiling about Alkins airballing.

This game doesn’t even matter.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Wow. Officials really gon’ try dey best to get Carolina back in this.
This is pathetic.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

Ayn Rand was a cop.

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Shitty Clippers strike again.