Your “I Know Whom To Kill; I Don’t Need The Other Options” Monday Evening Open Thread

NFL News:

  • Well, this rates about a 6 on the interesting scale: the Patriots brought in Lamar Jackson for a visit &  interview.
    • No details about what was discussed, just various media reminders that Tom Brady is almost 41.
  • Aaron Rodgers owns a piece of the Milwaukee Bucks.
    • No word on how much, but one can assume that it’s a ceremonial 1%, like Gloria Estefan & the Dolphins.
      • In fact, the Dolphins are the most celebrity-purchased team, with Jimmy Buffett, Marc Anthony and Jennifer Lopez, Gloria Estefan, Fergie, and Venus and Serena Williams listed as co-owners.
        • Despite Stephen Ross still owning 95% of the team.
    •   
    • Fan sentiment, as usual, has a particular take on the issue.

  • Horse pictured…right?

    Sad news on the GAMBLOR front – Kentucky Derby challenger “Gronkowski” may not make the Derby due to injury.

    • Gronkowski qualified for the Derby by earning the most points on the European Road to the Kentucky Derby.
      • Starting this/last year, the Derby began awarding an automatic berth in the race to the horse with the most points achieved after a series of races in Europe.
        • Probably to broaden appeal for the race beyond North America.
    • Due to the notoriety, human Gronk purchased a minority share in the steed last week.
    • An unnamed injury is said to be the culprit.
      • I’d wager that it was improper ab strengthening that led to his downfall.
It’s brought down weaker men.

Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Bruins at Leafs – 7:00PM | NBCSN / CBC (Game 6; Bruins lead 3-2)
    • Capitals at Blue Jackets – 7:30PM | CNBC / Sportsnet (Game 6; Caps lead 3-2)
  • NBA:
    • Rockets at Timberwolves – 7:00PM | TNT / TSN (Game 4; Rockets lead 2-1)
    • Thunder at Jazz – 9:30PM | TNT / TSN (Game 4; Jazz lead 2-1)
  • MLB:
    • Twins at Yankees – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN
  • WWE:
    • Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA

It’s three days until the Draft. Expect rumours & media clips to ramp up as everyone heads to Jerryworld for the whole shebang. Me – I’ve got my plan all mapped out.

GONNA BE SEXY THURSDAY!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Wakezilla

Went down the YouTube rabbit hole tonight and wound up watching Bill Nye on Tucker Carlson’s show.

Forgetting politicians with lobbyist incentives, the one take away from the video was that the reason why there are so many Climate Change deniers in 2018, is thst Climate Change scientists/advocates still do not know how to convey their message 15+ years since an Inconvenient Truth came out. Bill Nye came off as a smug, patronizing asshole who couldn’t answer a simple fucking question.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Btw, props to WhiskeyDudeRon for solid tag work.

blaxabbath

ARI is gonna be so atrocious next year I can’t even make fun of it. Like, they won’t be an interesting 0-16 squad or tragically unserachieving playiff hopefully who choked to 4-wins.

No, this is the return to traditional Cards. Young unproven coach who — even for being a former DC is ‘old’ as his awesome year was 2015 (when he fucked our ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD) team in an embarrassing fashion (bastard) — is just buzzwords and totally without direction yet the press has to be like, “amazing how Larry Fitzgerald’s still putting in the effort to learn the new offense of this rookie d-minded rookie coach with his 250 year old lifetime coordinator!” There’s no reason for hype. No reason for hope. This is a return to regular division losses at home and fan comment threads of the eternal fan debate, “Look, we’re six weeks into the season and it’s clear this team has no hope for the season. Let’s pull the plug, clean house, play rookies, and try to tank as so much as to better lay the foundation for the future.” Vs “They suck but you gotta root for them as a fan. Because that’s what being a fan is and we never want to be, like, Cleveland bad.”

Ugh …. I’m taking over the cooking segments from now on I think.

Unsurprised

Why is my computer fucked up again?

blaxabbath

The most beautiful porn.

Mr. Ayo

OMG. I’m such an idiot.

I spent an hour last night watching the new WestWorld. Then I spent today reading all the blogs about what happened. Turns out I watched the first episode of season one.

So I have to waste another hour tonight catching up with all the spoilers I read today.

Senor Weaselo

Hey, I found a link to Season 1 of King of Bots! I’m just gonna watch that now…

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Had a cocktail tonight that came with a “buzz button.”. Very disappointed to learn that wasn’t code for clitoris.

Horatio Cornblower

Whiskey is good you guys.

Related: Guess who just had two depositions canceled and is “working at home” tomorrow?

Horatio Cornblower

Please. Like Frank Stallone ever has anywhere to be.

Horatio Cornblower

Mel Kiper just said Baker Mayfield is going 11th to Miami. I will borrow money from Hippo to bet that Mayfield is long gone before 11.

Brick Meathook

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Mr. Ayo

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Senor Weaselo

Position player pitching alert for the Dirt Vikes!

Horatio Cornblower

Tyler Austin was not impressed.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Ooooh, Strange Days is on Cinemax. Hot Juliette Lewis. Even hotter Angela Bassett.

My pre-wank plans are complete.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Love that movie, even if Ralph Fiennes is a little bitch

theeWeeBabySeamus

That’s why he needed that tough hot mocha to back him.
And he came thru in the end.

ballsofsteelandfury

Inherent Vice is also on. Is that any good?

yeah right

Yes. It’s worth the watch. P.T. Anderson you know.

Horatio Cornblower

You’re going to need to pay really close attention or be really fucking high. There’s no middle ground with that one.

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s a great description. I’m lost already.

Horatio Cornblower

Watched it the other night. I suspect it’s going to be on a loop for the next month or so.

Wakezilla

Hey Juststopdude, tell us the rest of your story and the aftermath of being the best man to a guy you hardly know

BrettFavresColonoscopy

He fixed the cable?