Them’s the Senegalese, who are electric. They ain’t stressed, which is welcome. For all the surprising games in this World Cup, there’s been plenty of dread.
The Americas have done poorly at the World Cup. ?? If it weren’t for Uruguay and México… Yeah, I’d still be watching, but also having The Hulks every now and then.
Costa Rica and Perú are out, failing to score a single goal in four games. Colombia gave the game to Japan in the fourth minute. Argentina is a shitshow; Sampaoli is a disaster of a person AND coach. He is making the world yearn for Maradona, even the 2006 coach version. That makes me surprisingly giddy.
Another pleasant first in the World Cup: goalies all up in the face of penalty takers. I don’t remember seeing that before. But ever since DeGea went up to Ronaldo in the second day of the tournament,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnV3jQSoL5U
It’s become a thing! Schmeichel was all over the Australian captain and Keylor Navas the other day… Can’t wait to see if that shows up in any PK shootouts in the knockout stage. It’s tough enough to nail the pronunciation on one foreign Yo’ Mama joke–imagine five. Plus you gotta mix in some bestiality for Slavs.
Wakezilla note: Re: Goaltending intimidation: The Dutch first tried this at the 2014 World Cup against Costa Rica. They subbed their regular goalie for their 6’4 backup, Krul. It worked the first time, but not when they lost to Argentina in the semis. I’m 69% positive that FIFA made a rule after that World Cup saying it was banned. Like the goalie five second rule, I guess it only gets called when it suits the narrative.
7:00 AM Central – Nizhny Novgorod
England vs Panamá
I don’t see the England debacle many are expecting. Oh sure, their lineup was leaked three days ago, and the coach dislocated his shoulder running, but the English delegation has never been known for being a quiet, competent outfit. It seems Rashford and Loftus-Cheek will start, and they were aggressive against Tunisia. Kane was great, obviously. This team is a great watch, not for the comic relief this time around.
And this is what my hermanos panameños will see over and over this game:
Via giphy.com
Although I doubt the referee assigned, Egyptian Ghead Grisha, would have the flair of Mr. Dos Santos.
Predicción: England 3–WAIT: I had forgotten about this. The Three Lions of Englen spent a day in this manner:
Via Rex Features, thesun.com
Reconsideración: England 0 : 0 Panamá. Now let’s disinfect this joint of fancy lads splashing about. Rubén,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Y5RvZYwbe4
Balls: Before I get into the preview, I have to mention that I was watching an Australian AFL show and they were talking about the World Cup and they showed footage of Jorge José Emiliano dos Santos and it was as glorious as the gif above. If anything, he deserves a full video:
I’m old enough to have seen him in action and it was as spectacularly awesome as you see in the gif and video. Now, to the preview:
My rejection of all things English football is well known around these parts. The arrogance and undeserved adulation just grinds my gears
However, I do recognize when they have a shot to win and this game is it. Panamá, for as much as I’d like them to win, has major flaws. It is a testament to how utter shit the American team is that Panamá was able to get in the World Cup and not the US.
I heard on the radio that the English team asked the media to not publish the lineup and that type of stuff in the future and that led to a discussion of the battle between English media and the National Team. Suffice to say that the press has their share of historical blood on their hands. It’s not pretty.
So, all around, the English football world deserves a shitty World Cup fate. It sucks because I love English people, their humor, and culture. And they did give the world the game. There is that.
Prediction: An embarrassing TWBS for England late perhaps caused by a Panamá red card. England 1 Panamá 0.
Litre_Cola: If you are reading this, I am awake. I am going to the pub for 545 am so that I can drink while I sit with a bunch of English fans who are going to get waaaay too pumped for beating Panama. Take it easy boys, you beat Tunisia, and are going to beat Panama. What a murderers row! It was said in one of the live blogs that it will taste better when England gets their heart ripped out later, I tend to agree. Their media will pump them up so high and then they will lose in an embarrassing fashion. Harry Kane is the real deal, I am pleased that Tottenham has held on to key parts and are legitimately in the top 6 every year. I still think that their young keeper is a liability, and to not even bring Joe Hart on the trip could cost them later.
Prediction: England 2 Panama 1. Kane continues banging them in.
Wakezilla: Despite losing 3-0, Panama had lots of positives to build on heading into the match against England. They shut down a potent offense for 47 minutes before they broke through. Aside from a 7 minute brain fart where they conceded 2 other goals, Panama played fairly tight defense. If they can incorporate their dirty tricks earlier in the game and not gas out in the second half, I’m saying there’s a chance.
England needed a goal in injury time to beat an uninspired Tunisian side. Now that the Fightin’ Crumpets have a win and the media is pumping their tires, it’ll be interesting if England enters this match over confident.
Prediction: Despite this tournament featuring lots of upsets, Panama is going to pull through and defeat England 1-0. The tears of sadness that will flow through the eyes of British folks will serve as jackin’ it lube for decades.
10:00 AM Central – Ekaterinburg
Japan vs Senegal
Don T: Japan was toying with Colombia in the last 20 minutes of the game. I have to admit it got dispiriting, but you can’t deny the Japanese their dent in a World Cup that seems wide open. It’s something to build on, but this game is tougher. Senegal ran around the Poles like they were orange cones. I’m rooting for them, sure! We could all use more of Aliou Cissé:
Via knowyourmeme.com
Predicción: Japan 0 : Senegal 2. Teranga Lions clinch the group, rest their starters for Colombia. Hm… Nope! Los Cafeteros have to earn it.
Balls: I’m still shocked that Japan was able to beat Colombia in the first game. Yeah, a fourth minute red card will do that to you. It was still awesome that Colombia got the equalizer with ten men and, for long chunks of the game, dominated play.
That’s all for naught, though. Colombia ran out of gas and Japan got the late goal plus the three points, and is in position to qualify for the next round with a victory today against fellow first game winner Senegal. That would leave the Senegal-Colombia game next week as the first de facto knockout game.
Prédiction: Pas tant vite , mon ami! Les Sénégalais surprise encore. Sénégal 2 Japon 1
Litre Cola: I thought that Colombia was going to blow out Japan and man was I wrong. The Japanese were a blur out there which had a lot to do with soon to be assassinated Carlos Sanchez getting thrown out. Would you return to Colombia if you were that guy? I really don’t think that I would. Hell, I probably wouldn’t set foot in South America ever again. Faeroe Islands here we come!
I am quite pleased that Senegal won, I have said before that I hope that they are the African side that goes through. If Sane gets loose here he will bury it. He is in great form.
Prédiction: Sénégal 2 Nippon 0.
Wakezilla: In addition to this World Cup being one featuring upsets, it’s also a tournament where Wakezilla irrationally falls in love with young and upcoming teams. Aside from Croatia, I’m all in on Senegal, baby! I mean, how can you not like a team whose fans clean up after themselves after a match? Despite Mane having a bad game, Senegal beat Poland last week. They’re young, hungry and have more depth than most people realize.
Japan stunned the world last week by defeating Colombia after a Colombian player took a red card 3 minutes into the match. The fact they scored and won means they are running on house money. To make things worse, Honda may miss the match as he has a thigh injury.
Prediction: Senegal is bigger, stronger and faster than Japan. The fact they beat Poland without Mane doing anything should be a confidence booster for Senegal. Additionally, Senegal knows that they need to win this game because they’ll be facing a desperate Colombia squad next. As a result, I’ll say Mane scores the game winning goal in the 79th minute, giving Senegal a 2-1 win.
1:00 PM Central – Kazan
Poland vs Colombia
Don T: Poland underwhelmed against Senegal. Colombia, well, I can only hope the players are rested after last Tuesday against Japan. Worth noting, Juan Fernando Quintero’s free kick in the Japan game:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzSp3nmxkK0
Bayern buds James Rodríguez and Robert Lewandowski meet in this one, which I think is gonna get chippy fast.
Predicción: Poland 1 : 2 Colombia. I trust José Néstor Pékerman Krimen.
Balls: Poor Poland had some horrendous luck against Senegal. I mean, both goals were a result of Polish mistakes. The bad luck continues because they catch a desperate Colombian team trying their best to not continue the embarrassing performance of Latin American countries at this World Cup.
My Polish coworkers have gone from being all excited about Poland’s chances at this World Cup to taking about other teams. It sucks because they really deserved a much better fate.
Predicción: Colombia wins by taking advantage of more Polish mistakes: 2-0
Litre Cola: Hi! I am still at the bar for this game and I assume I will be quite drunk. This bar is a local haunt for transplant Colombians and Polish people in the service industry. It is going to be rowdy. I wasn’t angry last week with these two teams, I was just disappointed. Both had so much promise and both went out and played sad futbol. This game truly is a toss up but the Colombians have more class through their roster. I like the fact that it is an elimination game, loser go home… unless you score an own goal, then I wouldn’t go back to Cartagena.
Predicción: Colombia 1 Poland 0, the ole Twbs.
Wakezilla: It’s hard to believe that the two teams most people picked to advance to the playoffs are now fighting for their lives in the second match. Colombia had an epic bed shitting against Japan. James is healthy enough to start, which will help Colombia in the offensive zone. Meanwhile Poland’s centre back, Glik, will be returning to the lineup.
Both teams know that a draw isn’t going to cut it, so, we’ll likely see a sluggish first half and a fast pace second half.
Prediction: For me, this game comes down to who I trust more in a crucial situation: James or Lewandowski. I think Colombia will control most of the play, but will make a crucial turnover near the end of the second half, leading to Lewandowski scoring, and giving Poland a 1-0 win.
Banner via the18.com
Just returned from the new Jurassic World. Totally worth the $9 total for the 35 wks pregnant mrs and myself to get out of the heat on a weekend matinee. Not sure I’d enjoy it as much at full price.
Also, I’m pretty sure it was riddled with plot holes but I wasn’t really that invested in the storyline.
I remember the ex’s first pregnancy. August baby, brutal NC summer. SO. MANY. DOLLAR THEATRE MOVIES.
What country is “Atlanta?” I thought it sank.
I enjoyed the World Cup lesser footy today, but I’ll be damned if I’ll sit through an MLS match.
yeah, that’s just torture. I am doing work with #BFIB in background instead
Bubba Watson? More like Bubba WHAT? SON!
3-0. Ponlo
https://youtube.com/watch?v=GCRyHAJ3bxI&feature=youtu.be
Con los huevos!
I CALL THIS GUY UNLEAVENEDOWSKI BECAUSE HE DIDN’T RISE TO THE OCCASION
These newbies trying to make a big first impression…smgdh.
I don’t even know how I got approved.
Holy shit you’re alive? We already paid out for your slot in the death pool.
Who had Snow in that anyway?
I would applaud but i’m ‘kneading my dough’.
“Yes, need dough.” – Andy Reid to paramedics, after having collapsed at the Missouri State Fair.
Things got out of hand quick in Poland.
/fan new to the sport
“Colorado is up on Pol Pot?”
Fans of Poe Land feeling boxed in…
Go Fightin’ 8 Balls!
oh, I like that!! And YES, this is the side I was waiting to see.
This is worse than an MLS game
Wow. Talk about an obscure reference…
OSPINA!!
If I was a world class striker I’d never let a kick towards the goal sail 10 feet overhead.
I don’t speak the language, but I like what she’s saying.
I’d join her at the gym to do sit ups in a heartbeat.
ZAWSZE!
I’m on my last half beer.
#prayforscotchnaut
do you have worse Jeebus laws re beer purchasing in Northern Canadia than we does in North Cakalaky?
They’re weirder than we are apparently.
I have exactly 47 minutes to go back to the very store that I purchased beers from just 3 hours ago.
/fuck this town
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=1&v=enuOArEfqGo
I’ve heard it so many times I’ve taken it for granted. Seeing it broken down like this I realize for the first time how brilliant a composition it is.
/still, the lady that says “woo” has way too much mascara on.
The hanged mannequin does it for me.
Huh. I thought that was the previous conductor that Lee Van Cleef had a beef with. Shows you what I know…
Either works.
Not a fan of the “Smokey Eye” in Canadia, eh? Yeah, me neither when it looks like the eyes might glue themselves shut any second.
All things in moderation, Ladies!!!!
Well, maybe not ALL things.
/removes pants
Hey lookit that, I got home just in time to get some head….errrrr see a pretty header.
That still sounds weird.
I survived going shopping with my niece.
And more amazingly….so did she.
I hear Spanish guy’s sidekick, but where’s Spanish guy? I need moar nicknames!
He had that coming
– Gavrilo Princip
-Every porn director ever, explaining to the first-timer why she has something on her face
-The ladies of the Cook County Jail
The Poles are playing pretty kryzyppy.
Holy shit, COL are taking a dive.
Is that video up at the top of the “World’s Campest Referee” for real? It can’t be. That has to be a parody, right? That’s not camp, that goes so much further.
“Son of a bitch. Really?”
-John Sayles
Chrissie Hynde was so great!
Chrissie BeHynde?
It’s real. The guy refereed like that. Btw, he apparently was not gay. He said in an interview once that he did it that way on purpose to make a point.
Of course he wasn’t gay. He was just making an ironic point. As one often does.
Brooklyn bbq and bourbon is the best
See that little girl side-eye the camera? It’s like she’s never been on a world stage before.
English commentator: Russia has done an excellent job hosting this world cup. There has been lots of great crowds.
Maddow: “Breaking news, English commentator is a Russian agent. spreading Putin propaganda. Everyone knows these World Cup games are going unattended. Next, why bombing Iran to save them is a good thing. “
Who wants to shoot Polish cherry liquor?
I do!
/ was amazing. Trouble
Pouble?
You know what grinds my gears? When sports channels, in this case TSN, say the game starts at a certain time, but then it doesn’t.
Hey TSN, if Poland vs Colombia is supposed to start at 11am Pacific, how come it’s not half time? How come the game hasn’t started? Just tell the truth, damnit!
Hippo likes this very much.
“Top-heavy supermodels tend to have a poor sense of balance.”
-Science
Harry Fuckface Kane. BOOOOOOOOOO
great, now I have that song stuck in mah head
In “Things aren’t this simple but I’m not surprised” news:
https://www.huffingtonpost.ca/entry/highest-use-opioid-regions-voted-trump_us_5b2f1d28e4b0040e27438855
hey, fuck you, I would NEVAR vote for that asshole.
Hey, deep down in a place you don’t want to think about, you want a self-absorbed, out of touch, racist, short-term thinking, faux alpha male, amoral, grifting billionaire to lead you.
NO. I do think we are an inferior species that should be ruled oppressively by a legion of cats, but that’s another story altogether.
And it’s all about you.
I can’t stand when news media does this. Of course the HuffPo posts this because it re-enforces the narrative to their readers that only dumb, drug addicted hillbillies voted Trump.
A county “dissolving because of opioids… can lead to a sense of despair,” Goodwin told NPR. “You want something different. You want radical change.”
Some critics warned that researchers might be overreaching. But Goodwin said the study is not implying that the Trump vote “caused opioids or that opioids caused the Trump vote” — or that opioid addicts were voting for Trump.
“If you’re stoned out on opioids, you’re probably not voting,” Goodwin told The Dallas Morning News. But an examination of the association among opioid use, socioeconomic factors and politics may offer clues to the opioid addiction epidemic, according to the study.
also, I always, always vote.
I voted in the Demmycratic runoff for Labour Secretary, the one time there was one. It was ALL that was on the ballot. The poll workers gave me odd looks.
#DefyStereotypes
I swear I normally read the links. That’s great that they clarify , but 6 in 10 Americans only read the headlines. I still stand by my point
In spite of all evidence to the contrary.
I wish all of the games were that much fun to watch.
No shit. Open play, expressive players. Very enjoyable.
“A day after being put under investigation by FIFA for complaining about the refereeing of their 2-1 World Cup defeat by Switzerland and misbehaviour by fans, Serbia’s football association has filed an official complaint with the sport’s governing body alleging “biased officiating” by referee Feliz Brych.”
They should be asking why their players gassed out about 60 minutes into the match
oh, I need to make a point of watching their finale now. They are rattlesnake mean enough when they don’t feel persecuted.
“Listen, just because someone was virtually incapacitated after about sixty minutes doesn’t mean some kind of crime occurred.” – Bill Cosby’s lawyer
Intermission…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKVARXSHZD8
Gotta love a woman that doesn’t skip leg day
Deep Cut: This is the most exciting contest involving the Japanese since Tsuyoshi Noda and Toshiaki Mukai crossed swords.
Too deep.
You know what Sheryl Crow says…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HaqMbYQ5Bi4
Nope. Not racist. This ref is just ass.
As they say in Japan, a draw is like sniffing your sister’s dirty underpants.
Sup biracial Japanese woman?
both Japan and Senegal could be through to the knockout stage, deservedly so. Don’t think many folk saw that coming.
I saw Senegal making it. Despite my preview, I really do like Japan, but, yeah, considering the year and a half they have had, it’s incredible that they are likely to survive this group.
In all honesty, this is the best their top players have looked for Japan in at least 5 years.
your preview and header pic had me in stitches, BTW
OK. This ref is coming off as way too biased against Senegal. That’s consecutive yellow cards that a Japanese player did the same thing and didn’t get anything
Gotta hand it to Japan. They;re old, but damn, they have the fitness of a really in shape 18 year old. Senegal looks gassed, which is surprising.
Was that The NAMBLA Quarterly?
This Japan team has the persistence of Plutonium-239.
White lady in Yellow-face, embarrassing her son on teevee
Give me a few minutes with her alone and it’ll be nice and white.
I wanted Everton WOO’s Gana to score the match winner anyway
“Sneaky play.”
not a proper Japan thread until Big Tuna shows up
Alanis Morrisette would like to point out that the Japanese love tuna.
indeed
He’s going to have a hell of a time cleaning that weapon.
Once the assassination is over I don’t think he’ll give a shit.
This is all on Senegal’s manager if they don’t win. Bah!
obligatory:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tl6u2NASUzU