NFL News:
- Is OBJ gonna get paaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiddddddd?
- Apparently the Giants are working with his agent to make him the highest paid wideout in the League.
- I’m not sure what the Giants are thinking, considering he is coming off an injury and is only entering his 4th year. I’m all for paying players, but this seems like a bit of a reach and could completely screw the Giants over in the long run.
- It’s not like they have a lot of needs right now or anything.
- For reference, Antonio Brown currently sits atop the WR contract throne with approx. $17 mil a year, and Mike Evans is right behind him at $16.5.
- I’m not sure what the Giants are thinking, considering he is coming off an injury and is only entering his 4th year. I’m all for paying players, but this seems like a bit of a reach and could completely screw the Giants over in the long run.
- UPDATE: According to the windbags at PFT, the Giants are offering him less than $16 mil per year. [Link not provided on purpose]
- Apparently the Giants are working with his agent to make him the highest paid wideout in the League.
- Birdcano starting Center, A.Q. Shipley, is going to be out for the season with a torn ACL, after suffering an injury in practice over the weekend.
- Let’s see…next man up is…a rookie? Oh dear lord.
- Mason Cole is a 3rd round pick from Michigan who apparently was drafted to be the “center of the future” for the franchise.
- Interesting choice Wilks, considering Cole played 3/4ths of his time in college at left tackle.
- Mason Cole is a 3rd round pick from Michigan who apparently was drafted to be the “center of the future” for the franchise.
- Let’s see…next man up is…a rookie? Oh dear lord.
- Tom Heckert died last night at 51 from a rare disease called “amyloidosis,” which causes a buildup of proteins in many vital organs throughout the body.
Darkest Timeline Rod Farva? - Heckert formerly was the GM of the Eagles and Browns, and had been working in the Broncos front office, totaling a 27 year NFL career.
- Tom Heckert Sr. also had a 20 year career in NFL front offices as well, which I’m sure had nothing to do with Jr. getting the positions he did
- John Elway, obviously upset by the news, released a statement, then stomped 3 times and was unable to finish his breakfast.
- Heckert formerly was the GM of the Eagles and Browns, and had been working in the Broncos front office, totaling a 27 year NFL career.
- In a very long form read on NFL.com, Malcolm Butler is tired of being asked why he was benched in the Superb Owl by fans, and Los Titancanos don’t seem to care one bit as to why.
- I mean, sure, I’m curious, but it was probably just violating Grumblelord’s “one strike and yer out!” policy on player conduct.
- Fun fact: Grumblelord stole that policy from the Padres hitting coach, Matt Stairs.
- I mean, sure, I’m curious, but it was probably just violating Grumblelord’s “one strike and yer out!” policy on player conduct.
- Over the weekend, WCS shared this (below) wonderful video in the DFO backroom comparing That Team That Left San Diego to the Diamond Dogs of Metal Gear V: The Phantom Pain.
- The satire and sarcasm is thick and juicy, and doubly fun if you also happen to be as big a fan of the Metal Gear series as I am.
What the hell is on tonight?
- Basedball:
- Dirt Giants at Surprisingly Less Racist Sox Considering Their Name – 5pm PST on ESPN
- Non-sports:
- The Venture Brothers new season premiered on Adult Swim last night at midnight. I will most definitely be enjoying that tonight, and highly suggest that you do too.
Minor Site/Self Promotion:
- DFO’s Season Previews kicked off today with Ball’s Browns/AFL Playoff Preview.
- Stay tuned for Bengals and Lions to be posting tomorrow
- I’d just like to take a second to point out that I correctly called the outcome of the BattleBots Desperado Tournament finals, picking both the winner and his opponent!
- It’s less impressive when you point out that the roundtable went 4/4 on picking the same winner, but, I’ll take my extra half point for the runner up, thank you very much.
Preseason football begins this week, folks! You can put the nooses and cyanide tablets away until next offseason!
Oh Christ. Just get rid of OBJ. Get all you can for him. He’s basically DeSean Jackson. Cash out.
That is ?HAWT?
Why I disagree: OBJ’s hands are like satellite dishes with stickum.
Ok, so bear with me, but I have a pitch:
What if we all said fuck it and started a new football league where you could only play if you were visibly out of shape?
Million idea or billion dollar idea?
Trillion
Softball would cry cultural appropriation.
The defib futures market just spiked.
Hey Spur!
Didya get the jersey?
he did, was acknowledged in earlier open thread
Missed that. Did he like it?
he did indeed. I wished him luck finding employ with his Metroplex Central European drug cartel
I think he said he would have preferred a Browns Jersey.
Reposting this here:
Holy moly. Here’s Cleveland’s record against the spread in the last few years:
2017: 4-12
2016: 3-12-1
2015: 5-10-1
That’s a total of 12-34-2 in three years.
If you saw that trend coming in advance you could probably have made enough money to retire by now.
and you would think Vegas sets the lines artificially high, thinking Joe Public is instinctively inclined to fade #ThePauls
oh snap, B&W Cinnabon montage!!
/no spoilers
So 5 year run and have the two shows dock?
I cant wait for someone in President Cheeto’s PR department to write a book.
I’d settle for one of them reading a book.
/with words
//even “The Colour Kittens” would suffice (good message for a Nazi to learn)
Goddamn Colours bringing their yarn and catnip into our neighborhoods, taking away perfectly good house-pet jobs from red blooded American dogs.
#RottweilersOnly
Rikki is so old…
[how old is he?]
…that it’s eight o’clock and his predominant thought is “only two more hours and I can go to bed!”
being old means you can go to bed before teh sun if’n you wants to!
/have no wife I don’t need to terrify
holy mother of fuck, my DVR series mode somehow wasn’t set, now I will have to tape the overnight version of Saul and wait ’til the morning.
/white ppl problems
You might be able to watch it on the amc wobsite
Twitter can help you with this
This was the last soul train episode that Howard Cosell ever announced
I laughed a little too hard at that!
Relatedly I seem to have stumbled upon the end of The Wiz at Bryant Park. Can’t you feel the brand-new day?
Whoa slow down there Onterrio
If you have a clipboard and confidence you can sneak in anywhere.
This is absolutely true. Act like you’re supposed to be there, and you’re bored. No one will bat an eye.
Get yourself an orange vest and you can start disassembling things and nobody will say boo.
I have a lime green vest and white hard-hat that I use to set up cameras on tripods near railroad tracks and down by the harbor. The white hard-hat makes me look important. I lost a little toy drone up on a billboard once and I wore them to climb up it in broad daylight and I could have stayed there all day. Nobody bothered me.
That’s how I survive work.
*YMMV based on melanin levels
MIKE!!!
“Did you commit crimes with Mr. Manafort?” the prosecutor asked.
“Yes,” Gates responded.
Can not wait for the Orange Assholes Twitter meltdown in the morning.
It doesn’t matter. He could strangle a prostitute on live TV and Trump’s poll numbers would go up.
“Then they’re just hookers, did I not go over this?” -Sterling Archer
What a shitty day at work. At least we get our profitability bonus for Q2.
Folks.
Certainly not a major spoiler by any means for anyone not watching, but, Mike is making bank working for Gus.
I could’ve gone without seeing that, so thanks.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WQPfQvLIseA
My 2 year old daughter just laughed her ass off at this video. Mom’s pissed.
After many years and hundreds of thousands of dollars of government grants, I think I can safely conclude that our current obesity epidemic can be traced solely to our modern dearth of Soul Train Dance Trains.
Man, did I ever love that show as a wee lad. Hippo always been spiritually black.
/raises fist
“‘sup, brother?”
– Richie Incognito
hey man, I at least have SOME street cred. Hippo did grow up in a predominantly black neighbourhood (white flight, we found the concept silly, and stayed)
“Hmm…white flight…”
[jots down idea for an airline that services “exclusive” clientele]
– Chip Kelly
That man is starving to the point he can’t speak and this is the only way he can say “please give me a sandwich. Why are you clapping? I am visibly dying.”
He’s like 6 inches taller and 6 inches skinnier.
cocaine is a helluva drug
No mention of the return of Better Call Saul?
huzzah, I shall pop a 3rd pill and watch that after #BFIB lose to the goddamned Fish then
Feels like it’s been off the air for a decade.
A mistake and oversight by me.
I’m assuming the nascar crime is that he wasnt drunk enough to be driving
https://sports.yahoo.com/nascar-ceo-brian-france-arrested-dwi-drug-possession-161502794.html
He should be fired for not running from the police like his last name was Duke and he was in Hazzard County.
If he wasn’t saddled with restrictor plates he could have. The Intimidator never would have been stopped by no police.
Jim Irsay
Isn’t that how Nascar started?
Buddy had a shitty day, as evidenced by his talking in the third person!
But Buddy always talks in the third person! Oh….
Hippo too, Buddy. It’s only because life sucks. The only answers are drugs and FOOTBAW,
Buddy’s getting upset!
That’ll teach those ungrateful brats to try to get some money to eat or take a boyfriend/girlfriend out for a date!
https://www.cbssports.com/college-football/news/north-carolina-suspends-13-football-players-for-selling-team-issued-shoes/
Shoulda done something more harmless like cover up kiddie rape.
It’s not like they had any textbooks to sell.
Considering this is what caused the U*NC-controlled Board of Governors to run Jim Valvano out of town and effectively shut down the NC State basketball program for the 1990s, this makes me laugh my ass off.
BOLTMAN IS NO MORTAL HUMAN MALE! OBSERVE!
[Removes pants to horrified shrieking]
Boltman? BOLTMAN!? BOLTMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!!!!!
BOLTMAN will return. He doesn’t care about using his continues.
What herodotus450 was looking at when he…commented.
(borderline NSFW)
https:/ /cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/tXvZeLHkxFr4StXx2ZCRFT06New=/0x0:393×594/920×0/filters:focal(0x0:393×594)/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/6043131/72284280.0.jpg
I really need to find a new book of the month club to join…
Mine is just getting weird as fuck…
“Jewish-Japanese Sex”
I’m sniffing this girl’s panties I bought from a vending machine, but oy vey do I feel guilty about it.
I actually saw one of those machines while working in Nagasaki.
It was weird. I should have taken photos.
Nagasaki sounds like a blast.
Re: the banner pic