I fell asleep watching the West By God Virginia self-cousin-fucking last night. No worries, I caught Wazzu (who I mostly bet ML at -140, thankfully) eking it out from 3-5am compressed. Yeah, that’s an old trick from when my oldest was an insomniac baby.
Today’s fun:
Florida (+5.5) v. Meeechigan, No Homoes Chikin Bowl (Atlanta, GA – Noon, ESPN)
Yes, they put Peach back in the official title, but I mock them anyway. I trust the Gators to be even shittier than the Wolverine backups, but don’t have any bets on it.
Virginia (+4.5) v. South Carolina, Dying Redneck Town Department Store Bowl (Charlotte, NC – Noon, ABC)
My system says to fade both the ACC Coastal (except Duke) and SEC Paaawwwwwlll East, so I am at a loss. But Wahoowa has been pretty good as an underdog this year. May throw a $50 down.
Arkansas State (+2) v. Nevada, Martin Luther Tha’ King Bowl (Tucson, AZ – 1:15, CBSSN)
Because AZ legislators would want it that way, obvs. This is notable only for the Lesser Wolf Pack aspect (and yeah, they spell it as two words, weirdos). Don’t watch this.
Notre Dame (+13) v. Clemson, Raging Semi #1 (Arlington, TX – 4:00, ESPN)
Now, the real fun starts! I am more than a little surprised at the heavy spread, given that SO MUCH of the Tiggers’ dominance can be attributed to their fearsome DL, how missing its best player. Hmmmmmm. Still, I hate both these sides mercilessly and equally. Get fucked, dickasses.
Oklahoma (+14) v. Alabama, Raging Semi #2 (Miami, FL – 8:00, ESPN)
This also seems kind of high, though betting against Roll Damn Tide is a fool’s errand. Still, UGA showed some exploitable weakness…so an upset can’t be ruled out.
Satan has alot to be pissed about. Sloppy play.
#74 may never be seen again.
Why do I imagine this happening in senor ‘s music class?
THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED TO ME. Today. In rehearsal.
Good news, it’s just the tip plate. That’s fixable.
boooooooooo
Bama grinding Oklahoma into the bland sausage it is
ACC Zebra line judge can’t spot for shit.
So what’s the story about Tua getting beat by his dad if he did bad at football as a kid?
https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js
A couple of hours before the game I took roll damn Tide and the under! The under was 80.
EIGHTY!
nice, a second season of True Detective
I made it 3 minutes into it, or 3 wedding nights.
They gave away “Chick-fil-A for life” to a 98 year old man. That’s just good solid business math right there.
they’re really kicking a fucking FG?
They have momentum! Their defense will get another stop!
Sooners are holding and Bama still makes the corner.
Also, why does Nike feel the need to put Michael Jordan on football jerseys?
/happy to be an Adidas school
//looks at the available apparel
Under Armour anyone?
///remembers Under Armour is owned my UMd grads
MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!
////drinks heavily
eh, it’s all the same Chinese slave chill’uns in the end
Sweatshops run the economy…ppl forget that.
14 years later, I still think the Friday night lights movies is underrated, and it still irks me that I need to clarify it by saying it’s not the tv show
Their play sequences are dumb as shit, with the clock going back and forth willy-nilly, and not representing how long it takes to actually run a play. Or when the clock stops.
I still claim the last good football movie was Everybody’s All-American
Both of you are wrong.
Not Another Teen Movie is the best football movie EVER!
Is gazing at the ball considered a “football move”?
Herbstreit is cracking me up acting like OU might get back in this.
Dude?????
Now is the time to kill them Bama. Put a kill shot on Murray.
I know we joke about Saban killing people on the sideline, but whoever called for that fair catch should be killed by Saban on the sideline for real.
so is oaklahoma gonna make this a game or what?
Your optimism is admirable. But no, this will never be a game.
Is a kicker allowed to start his run up to the football from the 2nd row?
“Penalty will be enforced from the parking lot”
LMFAO
Oh, that clinches it. If Alabama wasn’t going for triple-digits before, they are now.
kicking off from the 7 now?
Oh, yeah. Real smart, Sooners. Piss off the guys you can’t stop.
Does Alabama even want to win this game? What the fuck was that? Satan needs to fix this ASAP.
Hey, Okie WR named Lamb…..HEY!!!!!
When you’re down by 28 midway thru the first half, and your name is “Lamb”….it’s probably not the right choice to make a catch and then start talking shit.
Because in case you hadn’t noticed, you’re still down by three scores.
talking shit at 6-28??
RIGHT????? THANK YOU!!!!!!!
The comeback begins…
I fully expect an Alabama defender to just start melting opposing players with laser eyes
Now Satan is checking with the rule book if Boise State can play for them in the 2nd half. He needs to get ready for Clem.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_100-point_games_in_college_football
You know who’s fault this is right…the Heisman committee. It should be their asses getting destroyed by a pissed off Alabama.
thinking I need to bet large amounts against UCF and TX
Sad jim ross is sad
https://twitter.com/JRsBBQ/status/1079193511696699398?s=09
and a Namaste from Tua
BOOM! THE Okkie CB got trucked!
I must say, I really admire just how much Spur hates pretty much everyone that isn’t the Non-Gendered Cowpersons.
I just really really hate just about anything from Oklahoma.
Not jim Ross though right?
exceptions are made.
So you think the Bowl Committee could somehow get Georgia to come in and play the second half?
Holy shit. I went to take a shower and….
Da Fuq, Boomer?
At least they’re fixing up some cool cars over on Motor Trend channel.
Guarantee you that Saban still doesn’t crack a smile at halftime, and finds something to find fault with.
“I just don’t feel like we have done everything we could have. We got a lead right now which is good, but I have yet to see a suicide taking place on the other side line so we just have to bring it in the 2nd half”
“Georgia was beating Cumberland 126-0 at Halftime in 1916. Maybe I should’ve gotten them to play!”
Announcers: We’ve replaced the Oklahoma Sooners football team with the child actors in “Little Giants”. Lets see if anyone notices.
The “Overrated” chants just seem a bit mean…
Oklahoma deserves it
Well…that was quick.
The Defense is going to get chew out at half time for allowing that offensive spurt.
Send in the walk-ons!
$20 says I can convince a 8 year old notre dame fan that their loss today makes their other national championships not count
convince him the ghost of Bob Davie wants him to be a Satanist
Tell him that loss retroactively makes Rudy Ruettiger an ineligible player so he never officially played for the Fighting Irish.
We have a first down! I repeat FIRST DOWN! This is NOT a drill!