Wow. This game. THIS GAME. It’s got ‘turgid’ written all over it, don’t it? But we’ll make the most of it as we always do. I don’t even know where to start but I’ve no choice. TO THE GAME!
Titans/Jags:
Jalen Ramsey insists that this will be his last time donning this uni so in a way he’s a bit of a Jag-off. There’s a ton of rumbling on various fan sites that Old Man Coughlin is rewarding certain players that are ‘company men’ and taking a hard line with other dudes that are out-performing their contracts. Yeah, it’s true-there is more than one fan site devoted to the Jaguars.
Also making the best of a bad situation? A certain Minshew, that’s who. Of course he’s not being asked to do a heck of a lot but when he his O-line creates a clean pocket he makes the vast majority of his throws. Those throws tend to be along the sidelines-he hasn’t attacked the center of the field much yet and tonight wouldn’t be a good time to start because gifted safety Kevin Byard will be waiting. Look for a long toss or three to wr Chark, the possessor of 4.3 forty speed. But you and I both know that we’ll be seeing plenty of Fournette and Henry this game because both teams don’t trust their qbs, I mean, love to run. Which of those two bipedal Sherman tanks will win out? Who can say?
But yeah, Jack’s O is ranked 29th and the Titans are 25th. The last three games between these teams have averaged 26.3 points. Betting-wise the over/under is 39 and the Titans are 4-17 straight up on the road against their AFC South brethren. If the football gods are cranky we’re looking at a 16-6 final score. If they got laid last night we might luck into 17-10. It’s gonna be that bad.
Do your worst.
I have no idea why I have this visceral hatred for Minshew. I think it’s because I assume he’s Proud Trash
Free mustache rides
Minshew is quickly entering Gronkowski territory for me,
And by that i mean its impossible for part of my brain to not think that his antics would be thought of differently if he was white
One completed pass will not reverse the “momentum” Jacksonville has, Troy.
-1 spanish armada. The natives would have been better off without the Protestants
Dang, step out for five minutes and miss another TD? WTF Jax?
“I’l hve a maegarita, glass dusted with Drano, plis”
aka, The Tennessee Waltz
So, Nick Foles has pretty much lost the job now, right? Does this mean in six years he’ll go back to Philly and win another god damn Super Bowl?
If so, I’m gonna need to move, immediately.
Foles right now:
They’re good throws, but way better catches
No, you don’t understand, Trubisky is the worst quarterback to ever throw a football, its all his fault
How long do you think it took to find a moderately attractive, thin Green Bay fan? I’m guessing they’re still looking and that poor girl is just an actor.
Actress
I thought that was out of fashion? For as much as I use the word “fuck,” I have to balance it out with some kind of PC decency.
Has to be an actress. As i always say, the reason green bay doesn’t have cheerleaders is because they don’t want them to graze on the field at half time
Eagles-Packers? Are they threatening to show a competent Thursday outing?
Wentz and Rodgers will be crippled this weekend
They’ll both come down with pink eye.
I’d be fine with that, especially for the Donks’ benefit
Trump loving QB vs Rump loving QB.
Go Packers!
“Hi. I’m Marcus Mariota and I’m not a good quarterback.”
-Trent Green
Guess making an example of OBJ got the word out – no illegal tint on Mariota’s windshield.
And just loud classic rock coming from the helmet
I love my wife. I love my son. They are in Atlanta and I have the house and the booze to myself. Even this shitshow of a game can’t bring me down
Get some weed
Federal cog. The Man still frowns on it, and there are random tests
Guess it depends on what you do. I just got my 20 year pin, and I have never heard of anyone in my agency at the DoD getting screened for anything.
Or watch ancient aliens on coke
Goin’ Ubering. Go…jags? Sure, that’ll do.
NO STABBY! NO STABBY!
Jesus. How many bar fights does Gardner Minshew the First get into in any given week? I’m gonna go with 10.
meathead with sunvisor, he can become the True Florida Man now that sonny boy is King of DUUUUUVVVAAAALLLL
I think USA needs a new terrible parenting reality show. Let’s get these two talking!
ah made him a ELITE athlete by callin’ him queerbait all the way through elementary school
[stubbs out cigarette on publicity photo of son]
None of those good things were Fournette. Quit fucking about and run the damn ball.
And get Chark involved in the offense, too!
What the fuck? Am I not already watching football, Yahoo?
Is that Yahoo the web presence?
Or are you just cheering?
Feed I’m watching has some “you could be watching football” ad for the Yahoo sports app…. during goddam football.
Fuck me. Should’ve kept working.
?
even the Tits can’t completely obliterate #MinshewMagic
Irish eyes are smilin’!
The machine has taken my money. Goodbye fun money
That was a quick hundo gone. Are you sure you didn’t put it in a prostitute rather than a gambling machine?
#uptheirish
Oh, this far from his earliest mistake, Joe. He is, after all, on the Titans.
Well that was a sudden change.
JAX-TITS TNF ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED
SUDDEN CHANGE!!!
Bar is open. Who needs a drink?
Clutch derp
https://www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/taco-charlton-claimed-off-waivers-by-dolphins-former-cowboys-first-round-pick-will-face-his-old-team-right-away/
This wouldn’t be the first time a taco came back on someone looking for revenge.
In San Antonio minor league beisbol, YOU fuck TACO.
There is such a huge disconnect between the hype of the pre-game run-up and the kicker kicking it through the end zone to start the game.
ARE YOU READY FOR SOME TOUCHBACK?!! doesn’t have the same ring, does it?
Apartment hunting is stupid. Looks like Maestro’s gonna just go out and buy a goddamn house instead. No, I’m not kidding.
Jags attempting some Jets-level “gains” there.
Nice play out of the gate there, JAX.
Frag
get Erin Andrews all wet
I’d get her wet, but it would be from her peeing herself laughing at my pitiful attempts to make her wet the fun way.
I’M ON IT!!!!
– A. Brown
– R. Kelly
Either my dog farted or Joe Buck started talking.
Apologize to your dog. RIGHT NOW!
I just heard the pregame blonde describe the pre-game show as an “awesome show.” I desperately need whatever drugs she’s on.
they’re called being a hot blonde
/must feel GREAT
The last one I had sure did. HEY-OOOOO
Maybe she just has a contact high from being near Micheal Irvin?
/Can you sweat aerosol cocaine?
Like Redshirt, I am also watching “Dicks Hard: The BBC Story.”
That is all.
Extra shitty day at work. At least am off tomorrow, My turn to take my parents on their doctors appointments.
I’m live-blogging from my local bar. I got 100 in the machine and I plan on walking home.
Go Tits!
Folks.
Is this some reverse “call me by your name” seducing attempt?
Because am game
So the pre-game show has the same people holding the microphones as the pre-pre-game show. I’m not sure if I can tell the shows apart, or if that’s the idea.
The blonde looks is cuter.
“Die Hard” is on BBC America. I have an out from TNF. Thanks, British Santa!
Love that channel but should be BBC: America the 90s. I get locked on any Star Trek TNG or Xfiles marathons they run.
They really need to do DS9 Marathons as well.
Did you fix your brother’s car?
Nah, its totaled. Frame rusted out and took out his brake lines. It can’t be fixed cheeply for a 17 year old car. He needs a new car.
As a car guy, I could never live in the north during the wintertime. Fucking salt.
Also 17 year old car. This was practically us pulling into the mechanic’s parking lot.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfN1GRqKXpM
Up till last spring, I was driving a 2002 BMW and the only way you could tell it was that old was no satellite radio or bluetooth or navigation system. The South may be an unkind place to poor people and minorities, but it treats automobiles with a lot more respect.
#FairTradeoffs
Oh boy it appears to be raining in Jacksonville. That ought to really light up the passing game. I estimate I’ll be fucking around with the car out in the garage by halftime.
This rare weeknight, primetime national teevee el beisbol match is so special, they are humping their fucking rasslin’ coverage instead of calling the game.
I, for one, LOVE Jaguras/Tits TNF fixtures. It is the epitome of Thursday FITBAW, and should be celebrated as such.
The AFC South should try and get the NFL to schedule every Thursday night game as an AFC South divisional game so they could own that night, kinda like the Lions and Cowboys have done with Thanksgiving Day.
I like how you think, except re the P*ts
The P*ts part has nothing to do with thinking.
Turgid? More like turd-gid, amirite?
Example for why I drink:
Momshirt: “Your brother’s car broke down but don’t help him out. He’s a grown up and he needs to learn how to do it himself.”
Dadshirt: “Your brother’s car broke down, but can you help him out? You’re so good at finding great cars at a good price.”
My shirtadvice to you? At some shirtpoint you should shirtchair a shirtconference with your shirtparents and shirtwork out all these shirtissues.
Shirtyeah!
#BFIB and Bastard Man Small Bears are on Fox national in 15 minutes, too.
Seems like a lose/lose situation there.
Let’s go have a drink at the pub.
Which one?
Ye Ol’ Cock & Bush, where else?
Hot
Yeah, Richard Burton did look good in that movie.
Right in the jags.
Tits/Jagoffs is the only NFL game outside of a Steelers game that requires a terrible towel.
Umm humm.
JAGS! TITANS! Time to bust out the JAG RAG!
