Wow. This game. THIS GAME. It’s got ‘turgid’ written all over it, don’t it? But we’ll make the most of it as we always do. I don’t even know where to start but I’ve no choice. TO THE GAME!
Titans/Jags:
Jalen Ramsey insists that this will be his last time donning this uni so in a way he’s a bit of a Jag-off. There’s a ton of rumbling on various fan sites that Old Man Coughlin is rewarding certain players that are ‘company men’ and taking a hard line with other dudes that are out-performing their contracts. Yeah, it’s true-there is more than one fan site devoted to the Jaguars.
Also making the best of a bad situation? A certain Minshew, that’s who. Of course he’s not being asked to do a heck of a lot but when he his O-line creates a clean pocket he makes the vast majority of his throws. Those throws tend to be along the sidelines-he hasn’t attacked the center of the field much yet and tonight wouldn’t be a good time to start because gifted safety Kevin Byard will be waiting. Look for a long toss or three to wr Chark, the possessor of 4.3 forty speed. But you and I both know that we’ll be seeing plenty of Fournette and Henry this game because both teams don’t trust their qbs, I mean, love to run. Which of those two bipedal Sherman tanks will win out? Who can say?
But yeah, Jack’s O is ranked 29th and the Titans are 25th. The last three games between these teams have averaged 26.3 points. Betting-wise the over/under is 39 and the Titans are 4-17 straight up on the road against their AFC South brethren. If the football gods are cranky we’re looking at a 16-6 final score. If they got laid last night we might luck into 17-10. It’s gonna be that bad.
Do your worst.
Foles and I have the same sling. I wear it better.
/Does best Sling Blade voice
Is Foles contributing to the game, or is that just his iPod earbud?
He’s listening to Celine Dion’s greatest hits
You’d think he could afford a speaker for each ear so he could at least listen in stereo.
His earbud is all by itself
So he could be an Eric Carmen fan as well.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzoazPPC7b8
Long pass down the sideline to Chark? I do love me being right on the nose every once in a while.
THIS MARCUS MARIOTTA, I CALL HIM BLACK CORAL, BECAUSE WHEN YOU TAKE HIM OFF THE ISLAND OF HAWAII, YOU’RE CURSED WITH BAD LUCK
Ok that was an impressive throw
If I was stranded on Hoth, and my tauntaun was actually Joe Buck, I would have a tough time deciding whether to cut him open and climb inside, or watching him slowly freeze to death.
I hate Joe Buck like the ACLU hates Donald Trump.
I don’t know if the ACLU actually hates the Sentient Overflowing Colostomy Bag in the WH; after all, he keeps them in business.
Hey man, if luke can wait for his noble steed to die, you can deal with it
It would really help me if Tennessee’s D could do something good.
HIPPO IS ALREADY KICKING MY ASS!!!!!!!
You can’t fool me, Fox broadcast team. Rodney Harrison retired from the NFL over 10 years ago. Fake News!
I’m starting to think Marcus is ungood.
He certainly is tonight.
Aside from lacking awareness of pressure, missing open receivers and making bad decisions Marcus Mariota is a perfectly cromulent qb.
Oh, Jalen got fooled.
Halftime, checking in on the Baltimore Orioles to see what….
Never mind.
Why do they keep emphasizing “The Second” so hard? Is he Redneck Royalty?
Maybe he can’t get it up again?
Wait what are we talking about?
Mrs. Sharkbait:…..This is a very boring game. Not amused.
*Baby is restless*
Mrs Sharkbait: See? Even baby thinks this is awful.
Joe Buck started complaining?
Didn’t you put in some sort of post-hypnotic commands for this situation?
Too many more of these TNF games and this kid might never come out.
Hey! a midget/short person in a vest just strolled by in the background on the field.
Lamar, I’m not a metrosexual by any stretch, but god please cut your hair
This is the Fifth Seal of Hell.
Incredibly Milli Vanilli?
I think am drunk
Well, at least we didn’t have to watch some horrible band I’ve never heard of play a song in front of a bunch of people who were probably fed a bunch of free drinks to put them in the mood to look like they are into said horrible band I’ve never heard of, which is apparently a thing on MNF this season.
It’s like a shitty Super Bowl Halftime Show, only shittier! And every week!
/mixes bleach with ammonia
I did that once when I was a teenager in order to make the place REALLY clean, and went to the hospital.
Greetings and salutations, you scurvy, crusty group of lovable bastards
Hey, I get plenty of citrus
I didn’t realize Pixar did a re-boot of One Froggy Evening with virtual Michigan J. Frog.
Haven’t decided yet if I regret coming to the gym, but my body feels how Mariota looks out there
It’s kinda like Minshew works within his ability and Mariota is that kitchen catcher piled high with garbage that no one wants to take out to the curb.
Hey, but at least the weather is nice in Jax.
Here where I am we haven’t had any rain all summer, my lawn is crispy brown, and yes, that JAX rain would be very welcome. Glass half full, I haven’t had to mow the yard since early June.
Stubble headed dude needs to decide to shave or grow a beard, not fucking both.
Forget it Joe Buck, Brady ain’t listening and ain’t coming back to your broadcast, he’s balls-deep in Giselle by now.
Is it just me, or does Vrabel look a little like Jim Tomsula?
good call!
When Dumb & Dumber are THIS bored…it ain’t a good game.
shhhh. They’re doing qb mustaches!
I went to high school with her
……don’t tell Seamus
Say what now? Hello? Is this mic on?
Did you see my pic from the previous page?
Indeed. Where do you think I’ve been for the past half hour?
It’s like you don’t know me at all. Sheeesh.
….. I’m surprised it took you a half hour
It’s the journey, not the destination.
I am dangerous drunk .
Co-workers today said I look thin. I didn’t have the balls to tell them I am work day drinking again for calories.
Stop it.
Working with my co-workers or workday drinking?
I am only willing to stop one of those things.
Take a guess.
Well then fuck Kathy from HR.
Is she single?
Only if you weight her by the quarter ton.
I’ve lost just over 100 lbs since my bypass surgery, and when the occasional person who hasn’t seen me since before the surgery exclaims over my new look and asks how I did it, I tell them that my next door neighbor started a meth lab.
I’d go, “How’d I lose the weight? Fucking. Tons and tons of fucking”.
At my age, that would be stretching the limits of credibility.
Guh! That was the point!
/#tonsoffucking
sometimes i am pretty fucking oblivious. A lot of times, actually.
3rd down passes behind the line of scrimmage are like a virgin’s prayer to get laid.
no esta via del Erotic Smashmouth
If brady’s complaining leads to better reffing….
Does it mean dreamboat’s powers were used for good?
Da fuq does he know about bad calls?
Well, he certainly gets the benefit of many bad calls, so maybe he is somewhat conversant in them.
Ok, as a Patriots fan, that was a tad over the top there Fox.
Has the league smartened up yet and scheduled every team’s bye week to be the week before they play on Thorsday?
I’m getting flashbacks like I am watching the P*ts play back in the late 80s/early 90s.
FACK YOU, THE PATS DIDN’T PLAY UNTIL THE BLEDSOE ERA, NO ONE DENIES THIS
WHO THE FACK IS BLEDSOE?
A teenaged patriots fan is in the natipnal spelling bee
Moderator: your word is Bledsoe
Pats fan: sentence please?
Moderator: Quarterback Drew Bledsoe played in the NFL for 13 years
Pats fan (while sweating profusely): … country of origin?
Cristina Pink is wonderful.
That is all.
ahem, Kristina ur love is nae pure liek mine
ESL.
E
S
L
#MeToo I prefer to only speak Hippo smh
I hope next week there’s a news story saying Jalen has decided to stay after becoming best friends with his new quarterback
Is it raining or are the playing this one in Belgrade and the Jax ultras are at their shit again.
Really glad I started Mariota since I was worried about Cam Sunday.
(2 QB league)
This is pretty fucking awful.
…..so typical Thursday night Jacksonville football
but el beisbol on KMOX is giving me quite the raging semi
/sorry FOAR unfortunate visuals
Boooooooooo
Maddon’s getting the sack, and El Birdos putting the final nails in the coffin WOO
3rd and 14? Pass it 2 yards. Jags running out the clock with 8 minutes left in the 2nd.
Looks like Rudy’s on the comeback trail.
He was offside.
So I’ve decided that I should drink more single malt Scotch. But it’s prohibitively expensive for someone who can put down a 750ml bottle in two or three nights. So I’ve been experimenting with some bottom shelf stuff, and I think I might be able to stand my latest acquisition. It’s a Speyside called GlenParker, and it headfakes you because the label looks a little like a Glenfiddich label, down to a picture of a stag. I paid about $24 for a 750. The label claims it is matured in oak barrels for “a period of years” but does not specify how many exactly, so I’m suspecting 24 (months). Not too bad. And the bottle comes in a handy canister.
“I’m not an expert by any means but if you want something that hits you hard, you may want to try a Glen Campbell.”
-Tanya Tucker
You can get a solid bottle of basic Glenmorangie for 35. Don’t do this bottom shelf thing to yourself
This. Bad Scotch hangovers are the absolute worst.
I usually only have three glasses over the course of the evening so hangovers don’t usually figure into the picture. But I will continue my quest, including looking into the Reverend’s suggestion.
Glenfiddich 12 is another solid single malt below $40 (usually)
With coconut water even Cutty Sark sings
J&B wants its bottle back
Don’t get held up on single malt or specific brands. Find out what you like and figure out what tastes like it. For example, do you like Talisker? Isle of Skye 8 is mainly Talisker with some other shit blended in, dirt cheap, and delicious. Need it to be smoother, try Glengoyne or another of the less famous single malt focus distilleries. Write into the mailbag with your taste preferences and I’ll give you a bunch of if, then recs.
(You can write into the mailbag here)
Will do, once I figure out what I really like. Back in the late 90’s/early aughts when I was travelling to Europe every couple months and the Euro was weak, I’d pick up a couple of bottles of high dollar 12 to 18 y.o. single malts at the duty free at Malpensa in Milan, and would present them to my scotch-loving but cheap bastard father in a show of filial piety. It got to the point where he had like 18 or 20 bottles in various states of fullness or emptiness and decided to sit down and do a taste test comparison of them all. With another willing accomplice, we split a shot of each example (we decided if we each did 18 or 20 full shots, the results might get skewed towards the end).
Short version, the consensus favorite was Balvenie Doublewood and remains my favorite when cost does not come into the calculation (i.e. when I go to the packy with a buzz already on).
Monkey Shoulder is my Hidden Gem.
Duly noted, thanks, will look for it.
Meh
Am I the only one that kind of misses the two tone Jax helmet?
Yes
The fuck is this “Only defend fournette” bullshit?
Booooooooooooooo
Pretty sure the titans have a top 5 defense these first two games, this wasn’t that far fetched to happen
“Only defend the border with Germany against invasion with the Maginot Line, those Huns will never come through Belgium a second time in 20 years.”
—French General Staff.
Jim Beam take me away…
So…maybe that nice lady from the other night isn’t busy?
I dint call her for this. That’s on me.
aka, Tennessee State Motto
YEEEEAAAAHHH WE’RE DOWN BY 14!!! ELITE DEFENSE!
805 on tap is not that bad
They keep putting it on sale at the grocery stores around here and it’s been delightful.
Ramsey has a magnificent fro
I’d like to meet his tailor.
So Seamus, i haven’t been watching much WWE latley, decided to tune in the other night, and this happened:
We’ve had Odd Week Jaguras, Even Week Jaguras and now Every Three Weeks Jaguras?