Yeah, Melvin Gordon is back in the cranky, hardline bosom of the Spanos family. It’s about time a rich white cabal won a showdown against a lone black dude. I feel as though the universe has come back into balance. To no one’s surprise, Rikki’s Austin Ekeler shares are tanking.
Going over the numbers, this doesn’t look like a bananacakes game but maybe we could have a bananabread tilt? The kind of bananabread that is just a little bit warm, warm enough that the generous pat of (unsalted) butter melts gently over the surface. The kind that has that crust that is a bit crunchy-not burned but has sat in the oven just a minute or two longer than the recipe suggests. Where was I?… Oh, right. TO THE GAME!
Eagles/Pack:
Fantasy dudes are whining that qb Rodgers is a dud so far but it should be noted that he’s played 3 of the top 5 D’s from last year. Wagerers are taking note that Rodgers is a minor god-like 62-10 at home over the course of his career. He should get well vs. a Philly team that has not recorded a single sack from a defensive end so far this year. “But at least their secondary is keeping things tight”, is a line that no one who follows the club closely has said this year. It’s remarkably easy to pass on this unit. Like, 300 yards plus per game easy.
Maybe the Eagles offense might come to the rescue tonight? Geez, I guess it could happen. However DJax is out, Goedart has a calf issue, Arcega-Whiteside has a heel thing and Alshon is also calving. Ertz should get all the balls he wants and more this evening.
As the Mennonites like to say, “Make hay folks!”.
WVU alumi Rasul Douglas did a good!
I am just as shocked as you when I saw who was in coverage.
The bleergh report will be the longest ever post on DFO at this rate.
So the Eagles defense is trying out some new Mutant League Football moves?
That was a pretty impressive display of derptitude for a third down defense.
Philadelphia with that hands up tackling strategy
Has anyone made an insurance purchased based on Aaron Rogers?
I really don’t get celebrity endorsements.
90% of Green Bay “owners.”
The last time I saw a Navy fail this badly in Memphis, Julius Caesar was balls deep in Cleopatra.
/Navy is playing Memphis by hte way.
Fits usernames++
The US Navy didn’t do too bad against Memphis back in 1862. But it was a different era.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First_Battle_of_Memphis
This “not covering Davante Adams” strategy is quite bold
That’s not how you spell bad
/am pretty high
Many teams have tried this against Julian Edelman.
Football is like 12th best sport imo
Interpretive dance for the win!
Number 11? Philately!!
Woooo! TECHNICALLY CORRECT!
Fuck these Zebras
Would it kill an NFL broadcast crew to use the Jon Favreau “HE’S SO LITTLE!” sound clip just ONCE in Tiny Darren’s career?
LOL BLERRRGH?
A WIDEOUT CAUGHT A BALL
fuuuuuuuuuuuck you
Tiny fake
HOLY SHIT, SOMETHING HAPPENED.
AN EAGLE DID A THING
f you add all of these flags and 3 more challenges then BC Dick will appear and shake his fist.
I really love how at least part of corporate America are trolling the right wing with all these ads with the interracial and gay couples. Just fucking love it.
Gordon Ramsey is my god.
Isn’t Sendejo where Red was going to meet Andy Dufresne at the end of Shawshank?
I think it was Pendejo, not Sendejo.
Premature Bleergh
You’ve been talking to my ex-girlfriend I see.
Ah shit with all these flags we’re gonna get another scolding Brady tweet any minute now.
lol wtf is any of this
Troy so much wanted to criticize Scandling for not catching it
Rodgers to he Eagles
A show based on 911 is easy, show me a series based on 411, and I’ll watch it.
411 operator: “NO I DON’T KNOW ‘THE SHOP WITH THE CAKES BY THE ROAD, THE ONE WITH FANCY LETTERING’ FOR FUCK’S SAKE CAN YOU GIVE ME ANYTHING TO GO ON HERE?!!”
What about this 911 show?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6IAuVqzwO_M
Them panties look like they are obscuring a bush like a crow’s nest.
411: “411, City and State.”
Me: (area of Cincinnati suburbs where I live)
411: “That’s not a city.”
Me: “Well, for being a figment of my imagination, it sure has a shitload of traffic, homes and stores.”
Are you okay? Did the ambulance/police get there in time?
I would gladly kill everyone in these Sprint ads with my bare hands.
Now that the warmups are over, Eagles can go into their patented “3 Quarters Of Actual Football Playing” mode
#96 for the Philly needs to learn its hard to bring down Rodgers from behind.
Nfl should have given the Eagles a bye week next week for the opening weekend of the Joker let alone a home game.
Update on the snowflake who slagged the company online. no retribution AND I am now assigned to a project she is leading. guess who is going to do the very least amount expected of him? I’m 20 years older than that fat load, and I play this game the right way. I’m looking forward to fucking up on purpose.
Fucking up on purpose is an underrated and effective tactic.
Yes, it takes some time, and you have to do it with a certain amount of tact, a real challenge for me. But i took this thing she did personally and I’m fucking furious she hasn’t been brought up and hammered for this shit. The first time she fucks this thing up, I will make more noise than Epstein at a Chuckie Cheese birthday party.
Just repeat my survival mantra over and over again: “She’s not worth the felony.”
I have been doing training this week. One of our new guys is from Jordan. Smart young kid. Electrical engineer. Pays attention, asks great questions.
HR sits in two days ago in training . Your typical southern VA “best your heart, redneck.
Afterwards I am asked by her about the people in the class. Mohammad’s name comes up.
She doesn’t have a good vibe on him. Thinks that he might have problem with women. We have had problems with ME guys in the past about women but if you just talk to Mo for 30 seconds and aren’t an idiot…it’s obvious he is gay. It’s literally the whole reason he is a refugee.
I am consistently amazed at the crap that comes out of HR people’s mouths because if I said the same shit, I would be shitcanned.
There’s a reason why the Toby character on The Office is portrayed the way he is. HR people are cunts, through and through.
stomp clap stomp stomp clap
If this keeps up, I might be out in the garage after halftime.
The best think about watching Amazon prime is the brit/scot feed. It’s a rolly good swaggering!
I was intrigued by this, but on my Amazon Prime I can only get En Espanol; the English language broadcast is Joe/Troy.
THESE EAGLES. I CALL THEM HEART DISEASE BECAUSE THEY ARE TYING TO KILL ANYONE WEARING A PACKERS JERSEY
We would have also accepted “Diabetes.”
I came to PLAY!
“scarves,” dumbass.
Carolina with a white QB….the dude could murder someone and the fans will prefer him over Cam.
Even if or especially if he murdered Cam.
Gritty. Hell be next governor of North cackalacky
Wow, Fox, the guy that got clocked in the head is OUT? Thanks for the update.
Other injury updates:
A. Lincoln: OUT (Head/Possible Concussion)
Achilles: OUT (Achilles tear)
J. Christ: EXPECTED TO RETURN (Hands, Feet)
You forgot J. Christ: Stitches in side
He was already dead when he was speared. That was the 1st Century Medicine’s way of checking if someone was alive.
The brutal thing about crucification is that the cause of death is suffocation.
R. Shazier: OUT (Neck, Nerves)
Megatron hydrated with Pedialyte. J. Christ hyrdated with cheap wine. Now that’s hustle!
Eagles playing as dirty as the city they represent. fuck them.
i am intrigued by your ideas and wish to subscribe to your newsletter
LOL late flag helping the PACK….
Are they allowed to call offensive PI on the Packers?!?
Nevermind….make up call.
Jeebus, it ain’t like my neck don’t hurt badly enough without slo-mo replays of this shit
ffs
Dammit Eagles at least dive at Rodgers legs.
Erin: “Good news guys, the player that almost died, can see colors again.”
A single bright light drawing him closer
“And one day, he may regain his sense of smell.”
THESE GREEN BAY PACKERS, I CALL THEM THE NAZI REGIME BECAUSE THEY BOTH HAVE HISTORIES THAT I FUCKING HATE
Wait, did the Packers just go a little too far at the end? – Marge S., Cincinnati, OH
LOL oh yea remember this guy?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=73&v=tn1uxb1FZM4
At least this isn’t baseball. If it was, the Unwritten Rules would’ve resulted in Carson Wentz being speared or piledriven because some idiot not involved in this play beaned a Packers player not involved in this play. Because nothing says “Don’t try to kill one of our players” like trying to kill one of their players back.
You know what? I want to kill every person in a Michelob Ultra commercial. Because they are an accurate representation of the douche-fucks who drink that beer.
Every time I see someone order an Ultra, part of me dies inside.
Just means one more good beer available for me.
That would make me feel better too, except I had to stop drinking beer about 5 years ago so it makes no difference if more better beer is preserved for those that appreciate it.
These appleTV+ shows are all jokes, right? They didn’t hire actual writers for this cliche shit?