Welcome back to the Beat! Last time out, HyperShock was hoisted on its own petard, Son of Whyachi actually got revenge, and Cobalt had good enough DI to not get killed off the top by Minotaur’s up smash, even if it still lost the fight. And then after press time seeds were given out, which was posted but let’s refresh that. It’s playoff seeding time!

1. Bite Force (4-0)
2. Witch Doctor (4-0)
3. Hydra (4-0)
4. Tombstone (3-1)
5. Whiplash (3-1)
6. Death Roll (4-0)
7. SawBlaze (3-1)
8. Black Dragon (4-1, Desperado winner)
9. Lock-Jaw (4-1)
10. Son of Whyachi (4-1)
11. Yeti (4-1)
12. HUGE (4-1)
13. Quantum (3-2)
14. Minotaur (4-3)
15. Blacksmith (3-2)
16. Upper Cut (4-1)

And we all know how a 16-competitor single-elimination bracket goes. So with that, onto the fights!

Just like in the play-in fights, I’ll give my picks, which I came up with beforehand, and not while I’m watching the fights.

(10) Son of Whyachi vs. (7) SawBlaze
Son of Whyachi: 4-1 (W, KO 1:36 vs. HUGE; L, KO 1:46 vs. Whiplash; W, KO 0:49 vs. Texas Twister; W, KO 1:01 vs. Kraken; W, KO 2:33 vs. Copperhead–Play-In)
SawBlaze: 3-1 (W, JD 3-0 vs. RotatoR; L, KO 1:42 vs. Tombstone; W, JD 2-1 vs. Blacksmith; W, JD 3-0 vs. Ribbot)

I know SawBlaze’ll go with the rubber plow a la Tombstone, but it didn’t do too well against Tombstone. Hell, it didn’t really do well at all against Tombstone. So for that I think I’ll take the underseeded in my eyes Son of Whyachi. Also they went with the AR 500 wedge, so never mind.

It was a definite change however for Jamison Go and SawBlaze, as it seemed that because Son of Whyachi is an overhead spinner it had fewer places to hide. The box rush went well. So well, actually, that SawBlaze didn’t fire up the dragon saw to try and bring it down on top of Son of Whyachi at first, once they had Son of Whyachi cornered. They just kept pressing and pushing and spinning the wayyyy former heavyweight champ and using that plow to much greater effect than the Tombstone fight. But the first shot from SawBlaze was actually a backhander, while the dragon saw was in the down position, and with Son of Whyachi stopped at that moment that was actually a useful hit. But Son of Whyachi escaped, trying to get up to its deadly speed, never quite getting there as SawBlaze was always able to hit it before then, as the saw bot pushed the heavy spinner to the screws, finally dropping the saw on one of the rotors and buckling a bracer before Son of Whyachi could escape. But then it was another deflect and push, as that bracer was really bending. Another push and pin and line up by Jamison Go dropped the saw right on it, breaking it in two. That’s the first time in all these years one of those Son of Whyachi bracers has broken, to my knowledge. Plus it went through that into the top of the bot, which started to smoke. It was trying to spin up, but couldn’t get up to the same speed due to the loss of stability, and the smoke, as another bracer broke, SawBlaze pushed it some more, and the smoke became a full-fledged fire as the fight ended and went to the judges. Just a note, it was confirmed that there was an editing mistake and the hit at the end was not a late hit, even if the buzzer on the screen had sounded; SawBlaze had confirmed this with the producers, and there’s a hit when Chris Rose said “ten seconds left” when the graphic showed five seconds. Either way SawBlaze wins and moves on by unanimous decision.

(1) Bite Force vs. (16) Upper Cut
Bite Force: 4-0 (W, KD 3-0 vs. Yeti; W, KO 2:48 vs. Bronco; W, JD 3-0 vs. HyperShock; W, KO 0:46 vs. Monsoon)
Upper Cut: 4-1 (L, KO 2:34 vs. Tantrum with Jasper; W, KO 1:05 vs. Mammoth; W, KO 2:17 vs. Breaker Box; W, KO 1:37 vs. Skorpios; W, KO 2:21 vs. RailGun Max & Bloodsport–Play-In)

Yeah, Bite Force is the top seed obviously. It’s only won the last 12 competition fights to this point, which means not including the exhibition rumble, and not including the re: MARS fights because those were after this. In short, yes, I’m picking Bite Force. In long, yes, I am picking Bite Force to win the fight and move onto the quarterfinals.

Bite Force came in to look, as Upper Cut was having traction problems from the start, or stability problems considering it nearly tipped. So Bite Force responded by sending it a few feet off the Lexan wall, which jolted Upper Cut to life, long enough for Bite Force to hit it again, have it tumble off the wall, and do the thing. The thing being that thing that happens when a vertical spinner is lying on its weapon, none of its wheels can touch the ground, and the weapon can’t spin up. Or as it’s known, a KO. Bite Force wins by KO in under a minute.

(11) Yeti vs. (6) Death Roll
Yeti: 4-1 (L, JD 3-0 vs. Bite Force; W, JD 3-0 vs. Free Shipping; W, KO 0:56 vs. Rainbow; W, KO 2:45 vs. Tantrum; W, JD 3-0 vs. DUCK!–Play-In)
Death Roll: 4-0 (W, KO 1:35 vs. End Game; W, KO 0:53 vs. Foxtrot; W, KO 1:19 vs. Quantum; W, JD 3-0 vs. RotatoR)

Two of the sturdier bots around take each other on. This is a tough one to call, but Yeti had the much tougher schedule this season. I mean, Yeti took on Bite Force. and if not for the forks would’ve have at least made it a much closer decision. Probably still wouldn’t have won, but hey, closer’s a… start? So I think I’ll take Yeti, even if it’s via reputation. Granted, Great White is really good at King of Bots, but I said Yeti and by gum I’m gonna stick with my guns.

Death Roll interestingly went for the box rush and nearly paid for it as Yeti popped them as they passed, towards the screws, but not into them. As Death Roll got its bearings Yeti prepared to smash and somehow flipped itself over. Not sure how but okay. Yeti tried to gyro dance back over, got popped by Death Roll which somehow kept it inverted, and had to spend a lot of time trying to get back over. Time spent on two wheels, time spent going right into Death Roll’s weapon, several times. But eventually Greg Gibson got Yeti back over, and it only cost the front right tire!

Wait, that’s bad. Yeti was in peril and limped off the screws and got sent skywards a couple times by Death Roll before a shot right on the drum stopped it cold and looked like it bent the bottom plate too. Death Roll wielded its knife in victory as it skins Yeti with a KO in a little over a minute.

(4) Tombstone vs. (13) Quantum
Tombstone: 3-1 (W, KO 0:48 vs. Lock-Jaw; W, KO 1:42 vs. SawBlaze; L, KO 2:59 vs. RotatoR; W, JD 3-0 vs. Gruff)
Quantum: 3-2 (W, JD 3-0 vs. Blacksmith in 2:16; L, KO 1:19 vs. Lock-Jaw; L, KO 1:19 vs. Death Roll; W, JD 3-0 vs. DUCK!; W, KO 1:44 vs. Valkyrie–Play-In)

Quantum escaped against Valkyrie, and I guess it would be a similar strategy against Tombstone, though with hopefully keeping the tooth on. But Tombstone does it better and is so much more stable, so I’m still taking Tombstone with this one. Ray Billings does have to be careful though, one wrong move against Quantum and it has the power to end it with that bite. Just look at the toy Tombstone on the end of Quantum’s teeth!

Quantum was smart to box rush. Unfortunately Tombstone expected that and rushed… back? Anyway it resulted in Quantum being flipped over, a dangerous place if Tombstone can get up to speed before they can get over. You hit the arm the wrong way and the whole bot is a write-off. No, instead Tombstone went for those wheels as Quantum got back over quicker than most crushers—Razer’s wings were very slow, for instance. Of course it didn’t matter too much because in a matter of seconds the back left tire was gone and Quantum wasn’t moving. And… that was it? Tombstone wins by KO in 32 seconds. A bit of a weird fluky KO, but it counts.

(5) Whiplash vs. (12) HUGE
Whiplash: 3-1 (W, JD 3-0 vs. Minotaur; W, KO 1:46 vs. Son of Whyachi; L, JD 3-0 vs. Witch Doctor; W, KO 1:39 vs. Texas Twister)
HUGE: 4-1 (L, KO 1:36 vs. Son of Whyachi; W, KO 1:25 vs. Jasper; W, JD 3-0 vs. Gigabyte; W, JD 3-0 vs. Bronco; W, KO 2:57 vs. HyperShock–Play-In)

Before Rakening 2: The Betrakeal, I would have said HUGE no question. I’m a little less certain of it afterwards because the rakes were a proof of concept that Whiplash could adapt with its lifter. Whiplash would need a perfectly driven fight to beat HUGE, so I’ll take HUGE. However if anyone can do it, I can see Matt Vasquez doing it. Also if the lifter gets smashed that’s it, fight’s over, HUGE wins.

The slightly slower but still drifty electric yellow robot tried to do the same thing though, go for the wheels. But Matt Vasquez missed with the lifter and paid for it with one of Whiplash’s wheels—actually in the replay it was broken off even though the bar hit the plow. Man, those things are not the sturdiest. But they went to go stop that spinner, whether by driving by it, or by using the lifter at the source, by the hub. And unlike the rakes it worked to stop it and keep HUGE up against the wall, actually lifting HUGE up but not over the wall as it got free. But that was the new plan, stop the spinner, try to get a lift, whether on one of HUGE’s legs, or the full robot. And this continued for pretty much the whole middle portion of the fight, as when HUGE did get a chance to spin up it hit the plow rather than the tasty bits. The struggle continued and it went to the judges. Judge Senor, who do you have?

Damage: There really wasn’t anything visible from HUGE, maybe the bends on the bracing arm? Whiplash mostly used the lifter. So I think it goes 3-0 HUGE for the tire.
Control:  That one’s also simple, 2-0 Whiplash.
Aggression: Whiplash obviously gets at least a point for its continued lifter use, but does it get the second for continuing to charge HUGE? I’m going to say that second point gets differing opinions from the judges but I think I give it to Whiplash 2-0, and with it the fight 4-3.

And that’s exactly what happened, it was a split decision for Whiplash, with Lisa Winter and Derek Young being the majority. Whiplash moves on for a rematch against Tombstone.

One last fun fact, they had to re-film the intros because Team HUGE member Peter Lombardo looks like Whiplash’s Matt Vasquez. So they did the ol’ switcheroo for Faruq’s intros. Which production didn’t notice until they swapped clothes back. And then production made them re-film the intros.

(2) Witch Doctor vs. (15) Blacksmith
Witch Doctor: 4-0 (W, JD 3-0 vs. Shatter!; W, KO 1:10 vs. Captain Shrederator; W, JD 3-0 vs. Whiplash; W, KO 2:17 vs. Gigabyte)
Blacksmith: 3-2 (L, JD 3-0 vs. Quantum in 2:16; W, JD 2-1 vs. Kraken; L, JD 2-1 vs. SawBlaze; W, KO 2:55 vs. Captain Shrederator; W, JD 3-0 vs. RotatoR–Play-In)

Al Kindle is the man, and it’s amazing that Blacksmith made the 16. I am a bit surprised, and for the record, Gigabyte would’ve been fighting Son of Whyachi, not Copperhead, but the gearbox was blown and they couldn’t get back up and running in time, so that’s a slight postscript to my snubs from last week. (Shatter! was not asked.) But hey, Blacksmith’s in! I’m still taking Witch Doctor, which has looked better and better with each fight. Also I forgot that this was a rematch of last year, where Witch Doctor led most of the match but nearly got itself stuck on the screws at the end of the fight and had to escape to get the victory. This time out Blacksmith has the forks on, its primary anti-vert setup.

It wasn’t a box rush by Blacksmith as the two met in the center of the arena for the first hit, which sent both bots spinning. The forks could get under a little bit but still Witch Doctor persisted, as Blacksmith wanted to play defense and stop the spinner. It wasn’t working overly well as the Gellatlys worked the same front right corner a few times, tattering part of it in the process and bending in the right fork as the hits started becoming just a little bit bigger.

The hammer started to fire, which was nice, but for Blacksmith’s troubles it got flipped, then flipped back over, and then flipped back back over, three straight hits changing the orientation. As it started smiking. But this is Blacksmith, which might be the sturdiest robot outside of DUCK!. On the other hand, sturdy doesn’t help you when Witch Doctor punts you right over the screws. So this was a question of whether the screws would decide to reverse and free Blacksmith and continue the carnage.

Yes they did, right back into Witch Doctor flipping Blacksmith over again next to the screws. As Blacksmith righted you could see the hole where the back right panel used to be, and though the Big Time Hammer™®º was firing, Blacksmith wasn’t really moving. The count started, and I guess it was more that they were stuck because Blacksmith was able to free itself and start moving again right as the count was about to start. Because Al Kindle does not know the meaning of stay down, dammit. Even though his robot is smoking heavily at this point, and flipped over again, where it was having difficulties self-righting due to the manys of blows that had been rained down upon it. To which he responded, “Is that all you got?” as Blacksmith managed to get back over. Get back over, but not be able to show translational movement. And this time there was a count. Witch Doctor wins by KO, a rare feat against Blacksmith, especially for a spinner, in just over 2 minutes. We’re still proud of you, Al.

Witch Doctor will fight SawBlaze in the quarters.

(8) Black Dragon vs. (9) Lock-Jaw
Black Dragon: 4-1 (L, JD 2-1 vs. Texas Twister; W, KO 1:06 vs. Bloodsport; W, KO 1:18 vs. Captain Shrederator–Desperado QF; W, KO 1:01 vs. WAR Hawk–Desperado SF; W, JD 3-0 vs. Minotaur–Desperado Final)
Lock-Jaw: 4-1 (L, KO 0:48 vs. Tombstone; W, KO 1:19 vs. Quantum; W, JD 3-0 vs. DUCK!; W, KO 1:34 vs. Bombshell; W, KO 2:58 vs. Skorpios–Play-In)

Hey, it’s the two inaugural winners of the Desperado tournament squaring off in the 8-9 matchup! I like the forks over the wedge in terms of leverage, so I picked Lock-Jaw in what should be a driver’s battle.

Both got under each other, but it was Lock-Jaw dealing the nicer looking hit, sending the Brazilian bot into the air, then following it with a hit that flipped Black Dragon over, and though it could drive inverted it doesn’t mean it wanted to. A couple front on front collisions flipped it back over, but then a bigger one flipped it right back. And Lock-Jaw. And Black Dragon landed on Lock-Jaw.

Unlike Black Dragon, Lock-Jaw remained as dangerous in either inversion, keeping pressure on Black Dragon. At this point the biggest danger to Lock-Jaw was a moment where a fork got stuck in a killsaw, but they quickly got it out. But Lock-Jaw kept winning the exchanges and sending Black Dragon bouncing. They just had to be careful of not burning out the weapon or the pulleys, which were slightly smoky. It meant that Black Dragon could start to mount a comeback, sending Lock-Jaw into the air this time as the weapon on Lock-Jaw was dead. But they were able to buy enough time to figure out what to do from there and lead with the forks, sending Black Dragon into the screws. They reversed and Black Dragon escaped, barely, as Lock-Jaw started to smoke a little more and start to lose mobility. Black Dragon was inverted and couldn’t really capitalize, as it had to self-right before it could really use its eggbeater drum to full effect. And it wasn’t getting up to enough speed to get them back over. Lock-Jaw tried to show movement and push Black Dragon, but got the fork stuck in a killsaw, which came up to free it and left a glowing mark on that fork rather than pulling a full Diesector, as time ran out and it went to the judges. Judge Senor:

Damage: As overwhelming as Lock-Jaw was, I don’t know if they did too much damage other than a slowing down of the weapon. Meanwhile its weapon totally died and it started to lose drive. However they can get a bonus in that the time at the end where Black Dragon was inverted in some places counts like damage (though that’s things like RoboGames). I may have to go 3-0 Black Dragon though, though potentially only 2-1.
Aggression: Lock-Jaw dominated throughout both by instigating exchanges and by using its weapon, and the times where it didn’t it’s not like Black Dragon did much—inverted Black Dragon couldn’t use its weapon effectively so it doesn’t get the primary weapon points. I go 2-0 Lock-Jaw.
Control: Like aggression, Lock-Jaw controlled the majority of the fight and Black Dragon really only had one chance to do something. 2-0 Lock-Jaw.

It was a split decision, which surprised me. I’m not sure how Jason Bardis scored it compared to the other two, but Lock-Jaw wins by split decision and moves to the quarters to face Bite Force.

(3) Hydra vs. (14) Minotaur
Hydra: 4-0 (W, KO 2:05 vs. Free Shipping; W, KO 1:36 vs. WAR Hawk; W, KO 1:29 vs. Petunia; W, KO 1:12 vs. Bronco)
Minotaur: 4-3 (L, JD 3-0 vs. Whiplash; L, JD 3-0 vs. Gigabyte; W, KO 1:19 vs. Lucky–Desperado QF; W, KO 2:36 vs. End Game–Desperado SF; L, JD 3-0 vs. Black Dragon–Desperado Final; W, KO 2:34 vs. Shatter!; W, JD 3-0 vs. Cobalt–Play-In)

I originally had Hydra winning this but its armor doesn’t seem super amazing in that WAR Hawk was able to curl up the corners. On the other hand, all it did was curl up and WAR Hawk had free shots to do plenty more than that. I think Minotaur would go with the chisel wedgelets, and in that case I think they can get under, and in that case I think they can win. So I’m going to renege and go with Minotaur. They’ve done well against flippers before, though granted Bronco had a vacuum fail before that fight. At some point attrition may catch up to them, no robot has fought more than Minotaur this season, as this is its eighth fight. Normally you figure eight fights wins you the title, as it did for Bite Force last year. Minotaur could have as many as eleven fights if it makes it to the championship, and that is many fights.

The two bots came out and Hydra immediately got Minotaur airborne, doing a full flip. However, Hydra went for a second and just missed, which meant Minotaur could come in and grind at the front. Then after the force of it turned Hydra, work the back, grinding away, taking pieces of the side skirts off and taking out a drive chain, which meant Hydra was stopped in its tracks. Minotaur wins by KO in 42 seconds, and they will at least have a ninth fight, against Death Roll.

So that takes us to where we are now, the season finale (tonight, Discovery Channel, 8 Eastern or check local listings).

(1) Bite Force vs. (9) Lock-Jaw

(4) Tombstone vs. (5) Whiplash

(2) Witch Doctor vs. (7) SawBlaze

(6) Death Roll vs. (14) Minotaur

In the quarters, I like Bite Force over Lock-Jaw, Tombstone over Whiplash but I wouldn’t be surprised if the the Vasquez family got the revenge upset, a JD for SawBlaze over Witch Doctor, and Minotaur keeping it going against Death Roll. In these projected semis, we get the fight we’ve been waiting for since the 2015 final in Bite Force vs. Tombstone, and whoever wins that, I’d say just give them the Giant Nut on principle even though I know it doesn’t work that way, especially because then I’d have the winner getting a rematch with Minotaur. But honestly, your guess is as good as mine.

Also since this now doubles as the Friday night thread, there are other things on. It’s the last weekend of regular season baseball so if you care about who wins the Wild Cards and gets to lose to the Astros/Dodgers in the Division Series, here are the important series to watch:

[Redacteds] at Nationals (WSH has clinched a Wild Card but not whether the game will be in Washington, CLE is one of three teams for two spots in the AL, 2 GB behind TB)
Rays at Blue Jays (TB is also one of those three teams, currently in the 1st Wild Card)
Athletics at Mariners (OAK has a 1-game lead for the 1st AL Wild Card)
Brewers at Rockies (MIL are still in the hunt for the NL Central, 1 GB, and are 1 GB of WSH for the 1st Wild Card as well.)
Cubs at Cardinals (Cardinals magic number for the Central is 3. The NL Central winner will play Atlanta.)
Astros at Angels (Can the Astros lock up the #1 overall seed?)
Dodgers at Giants (The Dodgers have the NL #1 seed but can they catch Houston?)
Yankees at Rangers (Can the Yankees catch Houston? They’d need to sweep and LAA to sweep so not likely. Also it’s the last three games at Globe Life Park as the Rangers get a new stadium next year for… reasons.)

There’s probably college football, but I don’t know what. There is preseason hockey, which might still have fights? Maybe? Anyway this doubles as a Friday evening thread so here’s sexy, uh, robot shots?

Try not to spoil it immediately folks. People will be pissed.

Okay, have fun.