Your AFC Divisional Round Playoff Game Open Thread

There are certain commentors here that are emotionally challenged, er, invested, I meant to say ‘invested’ in this game and they should be out in force tonight. Don’t forget to put on your kid gloves before engaging them-they’re in a vulnerable position right now what with everything on the line and all.

TO THE GAME!

Titans/Ravens:

-Rb Mark Ingram was ‘limited’ in practice late this week but he’ll play. Not sure how effective he’ll be. Maybe we’ll get a handful of Gus Edwards! That’s sticky.

-Speaking of running backs, there’s a broad-shouldered guy that has hoisted his team up there. Earlier in the year I pointed out that Oh Henry! wasn’t human and I stand by that observation. He’s got to do everything and a lot more in order to bulldoze his way to the W. There’s a real danger that the Ravens big, physical and aggressive D-line pushes Tennessee’s front backwards more often than not.

-I don’t think the Titans can win with Henry getting twice more yards on the ground than Tannyhill did through the air. There has to be a few long, successful deep shots to A.J. Brown in order for Baltimore to loosen up. I don’t think they’ll play the Belichick game of ‘let Henry get his and we’ll shut down everyone else’. They’ll get after it.

-The Ravens just have too much talent, right? That pass game that has to have an impact for the Titans meets up with two All Pros in Peters and Humphrey.

-Prediction Time. Henry finally succumbs but not before going out with a fight. Ravens 33 Tits 17.

Go Ahead. Make my night.

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Fronkenshteen

Kinda shocked that’s a TD?

BC Dick

Do we have to talk about cheeks for another fifteen minutes? That reminded me of CFL broadcasts. No restraint when nobody else wants your job.

Spur

comment image

Dick E. Phuck

The ass-drop heard around america.

LemonJello

Tannyfanny just gonna go all Sex Dragon on us tonight? Gonna be a lot more unwanted pregnancies in Balmer…

Spur

they have planned pregnancies in Baltimore?

Doktor Zymm

Something to keep in mind if you’re driving along I-95 today

Viva La Tabula Raza

So, CBS wants me to sign up to watch the game on my phone FUCK YOU GREEDY FUCKING BASTARDS, and yahoo sports app is streaming the game but apparently only with closed captioning and no volume. Way to hook the viewers, NFL.

Edit: Oops, I had the volume on mute on the yahoo. Old people don’t always do well with technology.

Spur

Baltimore Fans right now comment image

SonOfSpam

James Earl Jones should narrate everything.

Doktor Zymm

Damn, this is already turning out to be an exciting game! Playoffs >> regular season

rockingdog

thats was legit

Gratliff

Well shit, I’m sorry Ryan

Spur

Tanny slaps Raven Fanny

theeWeeBabySeamus

Goddammit that was a helluva catch.

Fronkenshteen

This is going to Sharpe or some fuckawful thing.

SonOfSpam

Lakers missing LeBron and Unibrow and winning at OKC 41-19 after one quarter.

herodotus450

Portia de Rossi being a lesbian is proof that god does not exist smh

Spur

She gold digging.

litre_cola

I nearly spit out my wine. Bravo sir.

hippofant

I miss Better Off Ted.

BC Dick

Before the unfortunate carving up, yes.

Doktor Zymm

Tannescramble is not the wildcard, that would be Charlie

Gratliff

Gonna be Vick in Green Bay at this rate

Spur

This Oilers vs Browns game might be fun for all the wrong reasons.

hippofant

I think AJ Brown just hurt himself tackling Derrick Henry forward for some reason????

rockingdog

Ohhhhh
INT
tits have da ball

BC Dick

Saw an interesting statistic: Jackson, Lamar is 1-3 in his second career meeting with NFL teams and had a 24 point lower passer rating in those games. I also think that’s not enough games to say anything and they’ll win this one in the second half.

Gratliff

If Tannehill throws the ball once, they should forfeit

Dick E. Phuck

The first fun Ravens team in existence and they’re already on their way to disappointing massively. I hate football.

Spur

I assume you a Ratbird fan?

Dick E. Phuck

No, but I grew up in Baltimore and I had to watch so many shitty games where teams were suffocated by the defense and Matt Stover-ed to death.

BC Dick

You didn’t enjoy arguably the best defence of all time in the early aughts? I found that a joy to watch.

Dick E. Phuck

Kind of, but the offense was so putrid that it made them kind of break-even in terms of watchability.

Gratliff

Remembering the shelves full of unsold Grbac jerseys

Spur

Lamar turned into Roy Williams so fast i didnt even notice.

Dick E. Phuck

TE should’ve caught that

hippofant

If Lamar were a running back, that interception would never have happened.

hippofant

OH AND HE’S A DIRTY PLAYER TOO I ALWAYS KENW IT HE’S BLACK FROM BALTIMORE OAFIJOVIOJODSJFTRUMP2020

Spur

but he speaks so well

SonOfSpam

Refreshingly articulate

theeWeeBabySeamus

Well that sucks.

litre_cola

Dearest Internet Friend. Its ok to be wrong.

litre_cola

Castigo?

WCS

WVU knocks off #22 Texas Tech in Morganhole.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0MWk_bHsag

Doktor Zymm

Unexpected!

Spur

Gus Bus

Don T

What’s shakin’?

SonOfSpam

Your entire island?

Don T

Sí puñeta

SonOfSpam

Siento escuchar eso

theeWeeBabySeamus

Too Soon?

Spur

Tits!

Spur

Who’s wearing their purple camo sweats?

theeWeeBabySeamus

No camo, but I do have Purple Raven’s t-shirt on.

hippofant

I just literally said aloud, “The fuck, man?” as Jackson crossed the field from the right to the left and picked up 4 yards.

Doktor Zymm

If he decides against the football thing after a few years I bet Lamar would be fantastic at tennis

SonOfSpam

lol like any East Coast club’s gonna let him in

Doktor Zymm

Someone would make an inspiring documentary about his fight to overcome that on his way to be the first man to singlehandedly win the Wimbledon men’s double tournament

SonOfSpam

Gonna write that screenplay and submit it to the blacklist WAIT I DON’T MEAN IT LIKE THAT

theeWeeBabySeamus

No Touching!!!!!!

SonOfSpam

Current temp in Bawlmer is 69, so I assume Gronk is there.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I like Derrick Henry. It’s really gonna suck when I have to start cussing him out later.

Spur

it’s warmer in Baltimore then Vegas right now.

LemonJello

How many city blocks are on fire in Balmer?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Be easier to count how many are not.

litre_cola

DON T vs FOZZ and Twbs!!!!! For the occasion I plan to get more high, drink more wine and dance to Tractorcito!

SonOfSpam

That’s also a good plan for any other day.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’M ON IT!!!!!

LemonJello

Does Dan Fouts even know where he is right now?

King Hippo

He should just wander off and let the other guy do all the talking.

rockingdog

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Viva La Tabula Raza

When I was young, I experienced the occasional sexual dry spell. While it sometimes was kinda frustrating, it never pushed me over the edge of committing homicide. What the fuck is the matter with these guys?!?! Just go cuff your carrot, or stop behaving in such a manner that women find you completely unfuckable.

https://www.rawstory.com/2020/01/involuntary-celibates-are-an-emerging-domestic-terrorism-threat-texas-warns-of-an-incel-rebellion/

SonOfSpam

Incellion?

Should be easy to beat, since they’ll all shoot too early and have no idea how to engage.

hippofant

It runs way deeper than not being able to have sex.

Like, the reason these guys can’t have sex is that they’re fucking toxic-as-shit psychopaths.* People like them have never been able to have sex. It’s just that now, they’re all getting together and being toxic-as-shit psychopaths together and it’s making them increasingly deranged. There are subreddits that are full of ’em devoted to their particular brand of toxic, hateful idiocy. You can go take a look if you want to understand it more, but I wouldn’t recommend it.

* And not like… the functional American Psycho sort that can pass as normal.**
** Yes, I just said that the people in American Psycho are “normal,”… cuz they kinda are compared to incels.

King Hippo

I really didn’t think it possible, but just keep hating Mike Bloomberg MOAR by the hour.

Sharkbait

Carefull, I hear that’s grounds for a stop and frisk.

King Hippo

hey, Hippo DOES look guilty smh

Doktor Zymm

wow, all that purple light does not look nearly as cool on teevee as in person

herodotus450

(rolls over)
-A corpse somewhere in Minnesota

Sharkbait

I thought all football was cancelled after last week…

LemonJello

Just in the greater Boston metro area.

theeWeeBabySeamus

How about a nice football?
What’s a football?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQM_kWxrJNI

King Hippo

everybody wave to Fozz!!

WCS

The bourble will flow tonight.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Wonder if he brought a sniper rifle?

LemonJello

I’m sure he’ll be the first to tell you he’s packing a cannon in his pants.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Just found out Clemson came back and beat U*NC in Chapel Hill for the first time in evar. Now, while I’m no Clemson fan….
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King Hippo

I am quite happy at the depths of Ol’ Roy’s #ShameTour

WCS

O fer 59 is Mac and Charlie at CharDee MacDennis level bad.

Doktor Zymm

Greetings persons and teams of rodents masquerading as people by animating a person suit!

I caught some of the early game while getting lunch after diving, and am now settled in to a cozy warm hotel room to watch the Patriot Slayers v. The Celtic Omens of Death! Woo!

On a related note, my instructor did the scuba certification for one of the Raiders LBs

SonOfSpam

What sort of nation-state are you currently in and plotting to overthrow?

And who told you about the rodents thing? Thought I had that on lockdown.

litre_cola

She isnt talking about in our pants.

Doktor Zymm

The ocean is great place to found a rogue nation, like Sealand, they have a Constitution and everything!

rockingdog

Found a funny:
16 years have passed and it’s quite possible that Stacy has herself matured into a hot mom who’s got it going on

Dick E. Phuck

Thanks for making me feel old.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Man, in 2003 even Stacy’s mom would have been a bit of cradle-robbing for me, though she would have probably passed the (1/2 your age + 7) rule.

WCS

I’m babysitting my niece and nephew, so I missed the second half. I see Captain Dingleberry lived to expectations.

WVU currently up a dozen on Texas Tech.

How’s it going?

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