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Your “How Many Chances?!” Thursday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

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NFL News:

  • Today is the story of the wanted versus the discarded.
    • The Chiefs exercised the fifth-year option on Patrick Mahomes for 2021, because who wouldn’t want to keep him as cheap as you can while the window is still open?
      • See: Seahawks, Seattle
      • Naturally, there will be contract negotiation drama all offseason next year, until they decide on a four-year extension worth $150 million, prorated to include the 2021 season.
    • The Bengals did the inevitable and released Andy Dalton.
      • He had been there nine seasons, amassed a record of 70-61-2, and holds the Bengals record with 204 touchdowns, and his 31,594 passing yards puts him only behind Ken Anderson.
  • Warm up the boo-birds: Ted Ginn is going to the Bears.
    • He is going to compete for the fourth receiver spot, and will likely receive more than his fair share of kickoff & punt returns.
      • The Bears mark his sixth team since joining the league in 2007.
        • Previously, he’d been with the Dolphins, 49ers, Panthers, Cardinals and Saints.
    • PFT torches him when they say, “[h]is ability to catch flying things remains suspect, and it remains to be seen if he can still be productive when not playing with an MVP-level quarterback. “

Today’s internet good dog is a chihuahua that loves pool but hates bank shots.

I’m sure he’s never ever been dressed in a sailor hat, or cried to while a family member eats spray cheeze.

Tonight’s … entertainment?:

  • Parks & Rec – NBC
    • 8:00PM – Highlighting many of the most memorable moments as well as all that went on behind the scenes on the comedy series that ran from 2009-15.
    • 8:30PM – Leslie Knope is determined to stay connected with all of her friends and family in Pawnee, Ind. during this time of social distancing.
  • NFL’s Greatest Games – 8:00 PM | FS1
    • From 2015: Green Bay at Seattle in the NFC Championship game.
      • Russell Wilson and the defending-champion Seahawks rallied from a 19-7 deficit with less than 4:00 to play to force overtime, then struck paydirt after consecutive 35-yard passes by Wilson.
    • I was at that ridiculous game, and prefer to remember that than the Superb Owl they let get away to New England, reviving the franchise.
  • Top Chef – 10:00 – Bravo / Food Network Canada
    • The remaining chefs are given a taco throw down challenge.

Seamus will be here tomorrow, and there will be something up this weekend, I guarantee you. Fare thee well!

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Nick Foles to Ted Ginn is going to be…another reason it will be ok when the NFL season gets canceled.

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BC Dick

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BC Dick

What a man and what a woman. John Wayne always does the honourable thing. And Angie Dickinson is a red hot natural goddam woman. Kind of lady a fella fights for

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ballsofsteelandfury

And, apparently, they both loved Dick.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Okay, let’s party.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Audience watching Psycho in 1960;

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The one laughing….

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Mr. Ayo

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BC Dick

I reminder when after survivor ended you got to see the hottest one in a naked picture magazine. But after they got to eat. Just a bit though.

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Mr. Ayo

Huh, I never saw either of those.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Anyone else watching the Parks & Rec special? The nice thing about Michael Schur is that he is one year older than me so I’ll always have a year to catch up to all his accomplishments.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

You make that easy! Even lowly me; I have posted WAAAAAAAAAY more GIF than that fucker has.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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“Well, shit.”

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doesn’t work.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo

I’m glad they ditched their original name of oxymoron

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

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ballsofsteelandfury

https://vm.tiktok.com/vG4T6m/

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

How I busted out of poker tonight: 77 in hand, flop is 447. I slow-play the remaining rounds with a J and an 8 turning up. I call a big bet by the chip leader by going all in, she calls me and has been holding 88.

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Mr. Ayo

She had you beat from the start.

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Sharkbait

That blows. Sometimes slow playing is a bitch

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“You just got RIVERED, ha ha ha ha!” – Marmalard

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

[next kid plops out on floor like in Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life]

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Gumbygirl

Every sperm is sacred!

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Date night.

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Don T

The day the crotch stood still.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That works!

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

This is from Michael Benveniste and Howard Ziehm’s Flesh Gordon (1974), but your title is just too good.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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litre_cola

Dalton to the P*ts?

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Sharkbait

Solid backup to Stidham.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

They accept gingers in Boston.

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blaxabbath

Miami!

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Dolphins and gingers??

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Don T

Came this ?? close to watching “The Social Network” today. Wanted maor scheming, so I watched “The Death of Stalin” instead. It’s great! Steve Buscemi IS KRUSCHEV!
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SonOfSpam

Saw that on a plane…very entertaining.

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BC Dick

That seems like the right choice. Have seen Trees Lounge? Great stuff from Buscemi. First time as director and of course he stars. Chloe Sevigny plays… you guessed it! Jail bait.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Trees Lounge was terrific.

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BC Dick

One of those movies I watch again the next day it’s so good.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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Gratliff

check it out y’all

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Gratliff

Fuck, that’s not what he said. I’m leaving it, in the spirit of the moment.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I’ll get it back up, just didn’t imbed correctly.

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Gratliff

Was, of course, referring to the classic Stephen A tweet that he graciously left unchanged 5 years later
https://twitter.com/stephenasmith/status/603384079044759552

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BC Dick

To do it properly it’s gotta be at least within a generation, preferably 50% plus shared genes.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Don T

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BC Dick

Thank the lord. I’ll untie the noose, then.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Win the Superb Owl and drive off in a Hyundai.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5yJgu38D24

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Gratliff

GOP-led legislators refused to extend the state of Emergency orders for MI and MAGA chuds packed in the Capitol building and chanted “let us in” at the closed session. The stupidity is really coming to a boil.

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Sharkbait

The anti-science movement in this country is fucking embarassing.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Yes it is, and prevalent.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

And dangerous.

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Viva La Tabula Raza

Inauguration day, 2021.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1L7HMRc_-nw

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Gratliff

The very definition of white privilege. Trying to imagine a scenario where a BLM protest packs a capitol building with half of the members carrying rifles that doesn’t end with a sea of dead protesters.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Absolutely.

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BC Dick

Difference of opinion. To act as if anyone knows the right way to do it is laughable. None of these people have dealt with it before and there’s no chance all the “experts” in the field agree.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

They know pretty much how it spreads. There is a lot of data that the recommendations work, a HUGE amount of data that show when they are ignored it spreads like wildfire. We have dealt with it before, just not this particular strain, which is highly proximity based infectious. Scientific consensus doesn’t require “all.” To act as if a consensus of infectious disease scientists across the world are not making sound data based recommendations is laughable.

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BC Dick

Then why the jimmy legs back and forth on how to deal with it? You can take it from a Malthusian (is that right?) point of view that the culled are not worth the detriment to the survivors. You could take the view that every life is worth the same.
Neither is correct. Neither necessarily serves the individual and the whole equally well. It depends on how you view the human life. Is a 90 year old man worth the same as a 16 year old? Is ones small benefit worth the others detriment? Any scientist or doctor who tells you he has the right answer is a charlatan selling good feelings.

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BC Dick

And lots of data? It’s been 6 months. They don’t know shit. A communist (as so many Americans think they want to be) country would sacrifice the dead in a heartbeat if it helped the collective good. An individualistic society doesn’t. There’s no rule book in the bottom of the monopoly box that says which is right. Scientists told people they had to be sterilized and forced into rejecting their cultures. And it was good for them. We are no different from those people other than our smartphones.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I ain’t flew all the way overseas in the middle seat for us to get over here and fuck up.
Greyhound don’t float on water.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PWgvGjAhvIw

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Sharkbait

Just saw the behind the scenes of Parks & Rec. It’s like they erased Mark Brendanawicz from existence.

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scotchnaut

“A Pole erased from history? Seriously, it was the Germans, really. Never been to the Katyn forest, ever!”

-The Soviet Union

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BC Dick

It’s “Polack”, damn it. And don’t you forget it.

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Gratliff

Cosigned by Ukraine circa 1945 to, oh, about 2014. Learn more about it at the Himmler Memorial National Research center, across from the brand new Reichskommisariat Shopping Mall.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Man, I wish *I* could erase a pole from history.” – Cody Parkey

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BC Dick

That’s good. I like that. I’m a polack at least in part. My family reunion was the Malkoskis or some similar spelling. A Y or with an L in there. Not that it matters. I’m Canadian through and through. There ain’t no history in these veins, Jeb. I’m as mixed as they come.

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SonOfSpam

Billiards dog is a treasure. I like that he has the most trouble with the 8 ball. Very relatable.

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Brick Meathook

He scratched halfway through.

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Redshirt

/ found a funny

I was out shopping and pretending the one way arrows on the floor were speed boost. So it only made sense to drop bananas behind me thus slowing down the other racers while also ensuring maximum social distancing by chucking cans of soup at them.

I have to shop elsewhere now.
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scotchnaut

Hmmm, I can’t think of anything off the top of me head. The Kink’s referenced their own tune “Lola” in “Destroyer”. Has anyone else done this? I’ma post Poison Ivy yet again because I’m fascinated by the tune, atm.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bvHsiYDs8pU

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montythisseemsstrangetome

Self-referential songs?
https://youtu.be/aBQIAWh3YBs

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montythisseemsstrangetome

It’s been a while. Remind me how the ol YouTube embed works?

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Sharkbait

The full URL embeds.

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Sharkbait

Apparently not mobile ones either….

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montythisseemsstrangetome

It’s fucking Glass Onion by The Beatles.

Technology has failed me.

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Don T

Just take out the “m.” from the cellphone link.

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montythisseemsstrangetome

Now it’s just pathetic.

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Don T

Fixed. Oof. That yella kerchief.

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Brick Meathook

Based on a comment in the previous post, I’ll make a movie recommendation that I might have made before. It’s Blue Collar (1978), written and directed by Paul Shrader, with Richard Pryor, Harvey Keitel, and Yaphet Kotto.

It’s about auto workers in Detroit and how they are fucked over by the company and the union and all the powers that be, who do it by pitting men against each other either by race or by perceptions or bullshit little politics. Keep the workers at war with each other and they’ll be too busy to revolt together.

In 1978, Richard Pryor was at the height of his career as a comedian; when the movie was released it was assumed by the public that it was a comedy about zany auto workers. And the first third of the movie is rather lighthearted as it depicts three friends, that a trailer could be made from just this section and you’d swear it was a comedy.

But Paul Shrader doesn’t make comedies, my friend. Paul Shrader is interested in the bleakness of the human condition. And this movie starts getting dark, and it goes darker and darker. Yet it is done so expertly, with such a strong cast all around, that it really is film literature, like Dante’s Inferno. Watch this move and you’ll see that Richard Pryor could act, and I mean it.

This movie is also a time capsule of the auto industry in Detroit when it still had the appearance of its glory days (even though the writing was on the wall), and many of the sights in this film no longer exist or are now in complete ruins.

It’s available for rent on Amazon for $3.99

Here’s a poster that makes it look like a comedy:

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Here’s a more accurate depiction:

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Don T

Great movie, dynamite freeze frame game.

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Viva La Tabula Raza

Other blue movies:comment imagecomment image

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nomonkeyfun

Most of the blue movies I know have covers that aren’t safe for DFO.

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SonOfSpam

Especially when spelt “blew”

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SonOfSpam

And this movie starts getting dark, and it goes darker and darker.

Ah, so the focus is on Yaphet Kotto.

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rockingdog

Found a funny:

JAMES BLUNT: You stink

JAMES TACTFUL: I bought you this perfume

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Gratliff

So, they’re bringing Reno 911 back

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It’s on Quibi

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Sharkbait

The fuck is a Quibi

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Unsurprised

Something idiots dumped billions into. It’s mobile-only, and doesn’t allow taking screenshots or sharing any of the content in any way over social media. Because why would that ever matter to mobile users or frankly to anyone in 2020?

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Dunstan

Ah, so it’s a perfectly safe way to post one’s homemade porn! No way that could backfire!

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SonOfSpam

That’s very good news. SUPER TERRY.

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BC Dick

I don’t know this qubi thing but it won’t be the same. Reviving a comedy group years and years later never works. But I don’t blame them for making their money off it.

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Viva La Tabula Raza

I was at that ridiculous game, and prefer to remember that than the Superb Owl they let get away to New England, reviving the franchise.
As the sun sets on my middle age and the Patriots dynasty, I will take some warm fuzzy memories to my grave.comment image

28-3, also.

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BC Dick

All fraudulent. A decade of black Sox.

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Sharkbait

Hook it up to my veins!

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

“Internet? What’s that? I do The Twitter!”

-Your President

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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montythisseemsstrangetome

I have the same reaction, boys.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Dunstan

I don’t think these DFO people are cleared to know about this. Perhaps I should alert the Computer to this security breach.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

That dog knows whut’s up.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BC Dick

That Súper bowl they lost in yet another year when New England was caught cheating and stripped of draft picks, money, etc. But sure, they probably didn’t spy on that play during a practice. I trust them.
Lance Armstrong is a hero, too. He raised some money so that cancels out the years and years of fraud. Fuck these rigged up jimmy tool bullshit jack in the boxes they call sports.
Next will be robo umps and sky judges ruling on PI. don’t expect any more season previews, (Cheers erupt) I’m done with the big leagues.

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Viva La Tabula Raza

I think I mentioned here a while back that I had stumbled across a cool Amazon Prime series called Hot Roads, and someone even mentioned that they watched some. Last night I fell across another, similar series. It’s in the same format, and is about interesting routes, not necessarily roads (i.e rivers, the Gulf Stream). Digging what I’ve seen so far, seems like they used the same philosophy with different independent filmmakers from all over the world making the individual episodes. Not all Dangerous Roads, but look like a lot of interesting subjects. Fifty six 50+ minute episodes over 7 seasons. Why have I never heard of this?
https://www.amazon.com/gp/video/detail/B084KVN5VH/ref=atv_hm_hom_1_c_iEgOEZ_2_1
or just search Mythical Roads on Prime…

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ballsofsteelandfury

I’m on it!

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Porky Prime

So who’s going to kick the tires on the ol Red Rocket?

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Beerguyrob

Flips coin; lands on edge…

Looks like Giants or Jets.

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Viva La Tabula Raza

Not the Raiders?

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SonOfSpam

Gonna call him DUUUUUUUVAL Dalton.

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