Five games to choose from! Let’s do this!
TO THE GAMES!
Jets/Colts:
“WILL COACH GASE MAKE IT TO WK. 8?” I mean, he’s gotta be the first guy shown the door, right? Between his own gase-ness and the injury bug taking up residence at the training facility he’s got a hard kettle of fish to row. Perpetual Tiger Beat coverboy Jonathan Taylor Thomas is ready to break tween girl’s hearts and the spirit of the Jets D.
Panthers/Chargers:
LA’S QB LOSES HIS JOB TO TEAM’S DOCTOR is what the headlines should have read. There’s no truth to the rumour that said doc was seen accepting a fat envelope from Justin Herbert’s agent in a dark alley at midnight. It was actually done thru Paypal in the middle of the workday.
Bucs/Broncs:
Denver has the 3rd most snaps taken by rookies and that will only increase as K.J. Hamler subs for Sutton. On tudder side, Jeudy leads the league in dropped passes with three.
Lions/Cards:
There was all kinds of talk on Giants boards about shoring up the secondary by drafting Isaiah Simmons because he was a ‘do everything’ sort of player. Well, the Cards ended up taking him and inserting into the lineup right away. He did some things for sure, including giving up 3 catches for 86 yards and 2 TD’s. Last week he played all of 7 snaps.
Cowboys/Seahawks:
This is the barnburner most folks’ll be fixated on. Whoever is playing slot for Dallas will feast because Seattle cb Ugo Amadi is surrendering an 80% catch rate so far this year. Who does he think he is, Buster Skrine? smh…
Do as you do below.
Dak erception!
If the Cowboys lose this game, the NFC East will be 2-9-1 as a whole, which seems better than they deserve.
imagine if y’all didn’t take the point today!
It would mean that they’ve gone 1-3, 1-3, 0-3-1. It would actually be getting worse!
Seriously, your goal should be to rack up as many Draws as possible
Just went to the driving range, for the first time in years, because my son has recently taken up golf, and I am happy to announce that neither of us will be playing Augusta any time soon.
And on that note…Hello (invisible) friends
Money, not talent, determines who plays there.
Well it that case you….no, no, doesn’t change anything.
HUMPS!
If I had the energy left I would go on an 0-3 rant.
Instead maybe we should tank for Trevor.
I’m sick of seeing that dipshit as my teams QB.
ook
Lmao at burning 45 seconds on a fake fourth down go for it while McCarthy stands there
Denver’s “crowd”
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Ei7v9DOVgAAzQUU?format=jpg&name=medium
Humble folks without temptation!
Listen pal, it is a bit of a drive from South Park, have some appreciation.
Tell me more about how hard this division is, Adam Amin, tell it to my NFC West face!
Dallas seems committed to getting more penalties than Seattle.
They achieved their peak at Inverse Leon Lett, why keep playing after that?
Dallas with yet another soul-crushing penalty on defense nowhere near the ball.
Next quarterback for…..
I bet McManus would be fun at QB.
I am soooooooo excited for this next season of Fargo. Enough that I almost want to pretend like I will have time to watch it
oh WOW, this is the bestest news I have heard. When does it start??
Allegedly tonight, methinks
Huzzah GOOD SNAIL – my DVR is engaged!!
Concur. It’s tonight. Lovecraft Country is opposite and equally worthy of your eyeballs.
That’s why I like YouTube TV…unlimited DVR capacity.
I remember when Dallas was a well-oiled machine…
You can remember the 90s? That’s pretty good!
*finger guns*
Great minds.
1993 wasn’t that long ago
— jerry’s escorts
Does Thor have four nipples?
I mean, Thor’s lady friend is spilling out enough that she has four boobs, so I feel like that’s an appropriate number of nipples
Considering how tight his britches look those are probably his nuts.
Dallas kicker FULL DERP
This Seattle Secondary has more leaks then a CIA black site guarding a free energy machine.
–B. Walsh
/unmute
[joe buck noises]
/mute
That’s me whenever RedZone goes to the Donks’ puppy abortion.
Fuck yeah!
“Needs more frosted tips.”
-Some Guy
This actually looks pretty tasty:
The yellow meal,
Mexican inspired kraft mac and cheese = 1 tsp chili powder
The Aztec pyramid really puts over the Mexican Inspiration
lol, did not even see that, well if you eat too much of this stuff, they will have to rip your chest open to get to your heart.
Canadian Fear Factor entry
Marconi and cheese is super popular in Newfoundland.
My favourite part of that is confirming the mild chili sauce
Lions have like a 95% chance of losing this. They’ve been doing the falcons schtick much better than the Falcons themselves.
Dallas is determined to dumbass themselves away from a win, nobody does it better.
The Atlanta Falcons would like a word, good sir!
Also true, but Dallas wins for consistency.
Philly and Atlanta, would like a word.
False start then delay of game on a 59 yard field goal attempt
This is the way.
its the McCarthy effect
Seattle defense: hold my beer
I, too, try to use the opponent’s helmet, head, and shoulders as part of my catching platform. Outstanding, TB.
Touchdown Hox
I know it has been two hours already, but can I just say out loud how relieved I am that the Meadowlands didn’t destroy the Niners’ bench again? Like I find myself just breathing a sigh of relief still.
DPI
Yeah, I got PTSD: Philly Teams Suck Dick.
why are they like this
<blockquote class=”twitter-tweet” data-partner=”tweetdeck”><p lang=”en” dir=”ltr”>Carson Wentz says he understands Doug's decision to punt at the end of OT, but adds tying is a "frustrating way to end the game." <br><br>Wentz doesn't think he's ever ended a game in a tie before.<a href=”https://twitter.com/hashtag/FlyEaglesFly?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw”>#FlyEaglesFly</a><a href=”https://twitter.com/FOX29philly?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw”>@FOX29philly</a> <a href=”https://t.co/xEp1vNIX2S”>pic.twitter.com/xEp1vNIX2S</a></p>— Kristen Rodgers (@KristenERodgers) <a href=”https://twitter.com/KristenERodgers/status/1310331447476187136?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw”>September 27, 2020</a></blockquote>
I thought he was going after the pic of the tennis ball on the box.
Either way.
The rookie Diggs is playing well.
“45!” “47!”
Is Brady calling out the ages of Belichick’s MILFs?
Orrrr…. they have the best translator already?
Guessing his own retirement age
I want to see him explode on the field
Rodrigo Blankenship looks like he was recruited to football by an “innovative” coach plucking european soccer players.
am making a drink. get anyone something?
Bottle of freezer vodka please.
Three different bottles waiting for your here in Tahoe
On my way.
https://hypebeast.com/2019/9/coca-cola-japan-apple-flavored-coke
Chavela, medium spice, with Tajin on the rim? I have to try to hide my Canadian amongst my California right now.
[waves a bottle of Labatt 50]
How strong are you really? Really?
OV or export
[pushes chips to center of table]
“Red Cap”
touché. And yuck
You Ontario guys are weird, Black Label or Club please.
Got a hotshot of heroin handy?
Second. I second that.
Big bag of cherry flavored edibles?
I have some of those!
Do you ship. Stupid NC is so backwards. One of the reasons to retire to a state where it is legal.
I sent some cookies to TWBS a few years back….
You are a good man. As my wife takes “officer of the court” thing seriously, I dare not transgress. She is a Catholic raised Jew so she has enough guilt to deal with.
I have plenty of beer, but what pairs best with hobo?
¡SPONCH!
Double bourbon neat
I should have a Bortles jersey made, the team wouldn’t matter because nobody could be sure if he played for them or not.
I would think the same logic could be applied to Fitzmagic.
I mean, when Driskell is free and clear in the pocket he doesn’t suck balls.
I feel like even that is a generous appraisal of his performance thus far
I’m on to you Former Canadian!!!
One of the most shameful things about me: I once kayaked from Grand Marais, MN to Thunder Bay, ON to smuggle back a jar of “KD Shaker” so that I could have an unlimited supply of powdered cheese in the US
Look I’ve been in that deep, dark place. Thunder Bay isn’t pretty. If you need some ketchup Pringles or a Coffee Crisp, I’m here for you.
Nothing like paddling my ass off through some frigid shipping channels with a dry bag of Rose tea and KD cheese, filled with an earned sense of victory!
Don’t make me post The Wreck Song, don’t make me do it!
That’s accurate. He’s just good enough for a roster spot but that’s it.
Dallas@Seattle viewers watching this game:
Keep your baseball away from my Football. I don’t even want to be reminded of a bunch of 50 year old white man watching a bunch of Cubans scratch their balls for 4 hours while bitching about unwritten rules to the game.
Okay, I’ll talk about the GOP’s ramming in the Supreme Court nomination another time.
Baseball and Republican politics. Both favored by 57 yo rural white guys.
Gotta say, Canada’s fascination with “Kraft Dinner” kind’ve offsets all the good maple syrup and socialism parts.
Shut yer whore mouth! It is the way some of us survived Albertan winters and it has made us stronger fundamentally. No matter how long I have been away, I insist on having a Blue Box in my house at all times
I also always have a box in the cupboard.
Crap dinner is OK as a kid but as you get older I think you grow out of it
No longer have any in the house
I mean, it’s not a thing I am proud of, but I have finished more than one 16-hour shift too exhausted to cry or shower to settle into a warm bowl of Kraft Dinner mediocrity in a way that definitely made me feel wrapped in the chalky arms of cheese powder love more than any human I have ever known
awww. And understand that feeling just not with KD
Well said. *golf clap*
Glory boy receiver
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_from_laughter
“Vindication!”
—Leon Lett
Leon Lett
FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
METCALF LOL WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING DOING?!?!?
DK Metcalf with the full derp
There’s the Laserface float we all know.
— B. Walsh
Must be wet to be relevant these days.
Geez Falcons, I haven’t seen a choke job that bad since David Carradine.
Honestly, we should be used to it by now. I’m surprised the logo hasn’t been changed to this:
Michael Hutchence has entered the chat
ngbp doink. Haha
Doink
PRAISE SHANK’LOR
Alright, Cowboys appear to be awake for the 1st half.
“Never underestimate mounds of coke in the locker room as a motivator. Yee Haw!”
-Anon, Arlington, TX