Just the two tilts to dine one’s eyes on today-the Red Zone dude won’t know what to do with himself. I get it though, a doubleheader tomorrow will make all my whining go away. Perspective. I has it.
TO THE GAMES!
Jets/Fins:
“Gore Runs For 100 yards at the age of 37!” You may chortle at that headline but it is not that unlikely-Miami has let 4 out of 5 backfields pile up at least 113 yards. But really, if the Jets go down today against Gase’s former team, is he a goner? Or was this the plan all along? The Trevor beckons and if the price is a chaotic season, a toxic dressing room and open contempt from the media, will it all be worth it? By the way, look for Fitz to go off again because the Jets secondary gives up an astounding 67% catch rate on throws over 10 yards.
Packers/Bucs:
We’re going to have to say we were wrong about “Brady’s noodly appendage”. The cork sucker has a total of 458 yards on deep (over 20) passes so far this year and that ranks him third in the league. Bastard. Speaking of guys that wish they were bastards, qb Rodgers is the leading MVP candidate this year! Should you play this Tonyan kid at te today? Only one tight end has gone for over 50 yards against the Bucs. As for his counterpart on the other side, Gronk sits at .09 fantasy points per snap, the lowest total for all fellas at his spot. As well, the Pack has not allowed a TD or more than 4 catches to the position.
Get commenting, ya know ya wanna.
TB seems to be on point today.
Is it worth checking out the end of the late games?
Speaking of horrifying comic strips, how about the one with the imprisoned guy? There were some real knee slappers about malnutrition and torture. Fuck Johnny Hart with a zircon encrusted baseball bat.
That was The Wizard of Id, I believe.
It wasn’t funny either.
I liked “BC” when I was a kid, but Hart got Jesus and the strip devolved into a syndicated version of a Jack Chick Tract.
79, nice + 10.
Jeeeeeeeeesus Christ.
http://www.tcj.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/AndyCapp4-650×515.jpg
Is that top-right one supposed to have a joke in it, or?
Yes. Violence is funny. Alcoholism is even funnier.
Bugs Bunny: Do you still beat your wife?
Andy Capp: Fookin’ ay, mate!!
I mean, holy hell, can you imagine starting this strip out today?
One of the greatest Amway inspired teammates you could have Tom Brady
Sassy Ref is in heaven today, sandwiched between Rodgers and Brady.
Apparently they still make these.
Nick Foles with the worst musical take of all time:
“I’m more of a country, Christian rap type person, but when you play meek, I get excited”
I’d forgotten the Baron Leftwich was still alive and that he coaches for TB.
The backup offensive lineman are contractually obligated to have to carry him up and down the sideline.
Socialized NHS medicine in the UK.
I started Ryan Fitzpatrick today and while he has 3 TDs already I’m barely getting any points because the Jets are letting them score so fast that he doesn’t really have any yards.
Nobody intentionally grounds quite like Aaron Rodgers.
Told you Rodgers likes the muff
Guys got great taste in closets.
“You’re sitting around the pool all day, chasing the muff around”
Jets Ministry of Funny Touchdowns allowed a Smythe to score.
Reg Smythe created the comic strip “Andy Capp” which was an incredibly funny depiction of mid-century northern British working-class alcoholism and misogyny.
Conn Smythe lived his entire life as a trophy husband.
“Hehe. Oh Andy Capp, you wife-beating drunk.”
Thank you. Caption appears to have been left out.
Yeah, I hunted the image and only found the one you posted, without the line. I’ll take the buttslap for the assist.
Happy happy Sharkie!
Signed,
Certainly not his P*ts
Oooh. Rodgers got runned the fuck over.
Sat Matty Ice in the only league where I can possibly win money this year. In retrospect, naming my team “Herd Immunity” was a dreadful mistake.
Same. But he had more points today than the rest of the year combined
Amazing that Biden is traditional DC and all he needs to run on is, “I’m good in public.”
Why did the NFL even bother scheduling afternoon games today. Just spread-out a few games on each day of the week. We all want this.
You obviously haven’t seen the returning CBS line up….
“We’ve got a retard doctor and everything! Wait… That’s not us? Shit!”
-CBS
Is the retard doctor show still on?
In these uncertain times we need our Retard Doctor Shows MOAR than ever!
Aren’t all the shows about retard doctors? Or at least retards? Or at least created for retards? No insult of retards meant by using that word.
Got replaced with a show about Michael J Fox playing a bartender
I’d be down for a Thursday-Monday lineup of football
Todd Bowels is a very good DC.
If Rogers is so good, “Jason Pierre-Paul in his face” should be plenty of window to throw.
Folks
Now, my TV is telling me that if I vote “no” (or maybe “yes” I forget now) on Prop 23 I’ll be killing a bunch of old people.
Is that a pro or a con?
I’m not sure. They’ll eventually die anyway so I just want to know the fiscal impact on me.
If you get to choose which ones die, it’s probably worth it.
I want to vote for the Prop that kills millennials, and then only because they have lousy taste in music, movies, comedy, and food.
I am hard-core Gen X
So uh Trump’s official campaign twitter account just came out and said that Whitmer is trying to have him assassinated. This is maybe not great.
“Or maybe it’s just me?”
-More of the Same
I’m glad we are finally at the point where that won’t make anymore of a headline than, “meh, it’s what you do all the time and she didn’t even do it.”
She had the numbers 8645 behind her in an interview today and the campaign has decided that’s a call for political violence because we live in the stupidest timeline
He riled up people to kill her. I think she has every right to call an eye for an eye — Trump’s evangelical base can explain it to him.
That shit is so silly. “86” has always meant “get rid of” or “shitcan,” not “terminate with extreme prejudice.”
the murder code is 187 if these fuckadoos would ever listen to hippity-hop
Gas up the PT Cruiser, its go time – Meal Team SIx members
There’s a line of thinking I’ve seen from some of the less trusting people that the militia kidnapping plot should be just dismissed as entrapment since they were all dumb as fuck to the point that they didn’t notice the federal agent magically materialize with an explosives sale and the only reason they did enough to go to jail is because the FBI got them to agree to it. I definitely don’t give a fuck if these dipshits spend the rest of their lives in prison, but they definitely are that stupid.
Dog food factory them and be done with it.
No one is bothering with Epstein’s murder; who’d carry about these shits plus Rittenhouse (and better throw I his parents to be safe) plus anyone in the Trump orbit with less than eight direct criminal entangles with Donald (those in his close circle will need a trial acted before their execution).
I’m fully expecting to be big mad when power changes hands and they call for a time of healing and forgiveness instead of creating a stockade big enough for the entire administration
No one is going to prison. Biden learned that from Obama, too.
Motherfucker.
Well since the Constitution doesn’t explicitly forbid the States from assassinating the president it must be protected by the 10th Amendment. Checkmate Federalists!
The more hopeless his political situation, the more unhinged he gets. I hope certain generals have been talking about nuclear protocols.
Hingle McCringleberry reference in the Jets game!!!
“Maybe it’s from Die Hard 2” – Aikman
Troy Aikman showing his age by not recognizing the pelvis pump celebration
Jets fans: Rich Kotite is the worst coach in Jets history
Adam Gase: Hold my Whiteclaw
HOW ABOUT THEM DONKS!!!!
/kicker and defensing unit only ,, obvs
I seriously don’t know how they did that W*.
*also applies to Giants win
I have to go to wifey’s work-family-fall-picnic-what-have-you. I’ll be back for the night cap, and another Game 7!
Also, my thoughts on Stillers-Pauls:
According to the TV, if I vote “no” on Prop 20 I’m voting “for” child sex trafficking.
Not sure what to do here . . .
Messaging in California seems particularly confused this year
This photo is awesome.
There is nothing as immediately hypocritical as a business owner/organization that identifies itself as leftist when faced with literally anything that might cost them money. See: Literally any leftwing publication if an employee so much as uses the word “union”
Except proudly-Union TPM, which is more centre-left – but intellectually honest.
You don’t want to DESTROY JOBS do you?
That’s a pretty cool ad (Bruce Willis Advance Auto Parts)
Dolphins defense letting the slot receivers be wide open 7-10 yards downfield.
Adam Gase: Let’s switch to running the ball
Gas is just trying to prove he improved the RB spot. He didn’t, but he will be fired here in the next couple of games.
I will be the only person in Michigan watching Eagles-Gints on Thursday, I’m thinking
That’s awfully nice of the LOLphins to let the Jets’ offense look competent
Eagles are 1-4-1 and definitely the favorite to win the division
How can they lose?
Adam Gase must be really good at sucking dick because I can’t see how he’s still employed by the Jests
The tongue as well as the eyes of a chameleon
Well their owner has bought himself a ranking position in the fascist administration.
Wentz and the ambulatory water boys might pull this off
They did not
bears win yay
It’s fitting that the Jets are wearing their 90s football jerseys because this team looks like the Rich Corttite era Jets
Quitting Jets have quit.
Myles Gaskin looking like Walter Payton thanks to the Jets defense
Big hat tip to Scotchy for his early window prognosticating. Looks like I’m gonna cash having used Henry and Burton today. Thanks man!
I need 40 points from Fitz, Adams and Miami D to cash today I think
You’re on your way with Fitz!
This is fantastic! So happy to help out.
Every game I gave a rat’s ass about in the early slate ended up going against the team I wanted to see win. Why do I subject myself to this kind of abuse?
Because you are a sinner and you know it. Accept Jesus now.
Can I accept Jesus and still continue to sin?
Truly, it is the only way
WOW. Thats some awful PI on Peters
That feeling when your opponent has Justin Jefferson and his two TDs sitting on his bench:
Gumby’s first sub was the Thomas Jefferson. They went into the shipyard to decommission at the same time as the George Washington, and eventually combined crews. Thereafter, they were known as the George Jefferson.
WEEZY!
Crennel is going to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. He’ll probably get the permanent position now.
found a funny:
Why are trains so expensive? You going that way anyways, just drop me off
“Never thought about it that way. Hmmm…”
-Planes and Automobiles
Nice catch! (And Fox shoulda been more careful with the field audio just after that).
Cam Newton: Is he elite?