Well, this is a bummer isn’t it? It’s another one of those ‘point and laugh’ games unless you’re a backer of one of these squadoos. Then it’s a matter of “Oof! Please don’t make this more embarrassing than it has to be”. The possibility exists but it’s unlikely we’ll get “Derrick Henry forces Josh Norman to hand in his man card” levels of mortification.
TO THE GAME!
Cowboys/Eagles:
-There’s a DiNucci kid on the block (Berman’s nascent bloated corpse smiles) by the name of Ben getting his very first start in the big leagues. Who is he? What are his strengths? Well, he went to James Madison and led them to the championship game. He had a 71% completion rate and ran a total of 122 times. He’s got a decent arm but you’ll not likely see much of it tonight.
-OC Moore will likely dial up plenty of short passes in the form of screens, flare outs and quick slants so that Little Ben won’t have many tete a tetes with the likes of Brandon Graham or Fletcher Cox.
-In turn Eagles DC Schwartz will disguise the hell out of his coverages in order to confuse the youngster, moving his safeties and lb’s all over the place.
-Don’t count on the Dallas D to force turnovers tonight-they’ve got all of two(!) so far this year. That decision to let Byron Jones leave and play rook cb Trevon Diggs has been a frickin’ disaster. Rookie cb’s tend to struggle and it’s no different with Diggs-he’s given up 437 yards so far this year which is 2nd most in the league. Guess who’s going to get picked on again tonight?
-Philly will be without Ertz, DeSean and Sanders but it may not even matter.
Enjoys the dregs of the NFL, folks!
is Carson Wentz gonna do good 2nite?
Hey, I’ve got an idea. Let’s tear that page out of the playbook and set it on fire.
ah yes, the rick mirer method
Sean Lee is alive?
Good lord, that offense is shit
Completely clueless.
How the hell is SVU still a thing?
Lots of real world material to write off of
Local high school cheerleader body found at post Trump rally. All signs point to boyfriend that comes form prominent evangelical family. Find out she been seeing “ANTIFA” goth kid on the side. Episode ends when the killer is revealed to be Trump campaign staffer that first reported the body in the first opening scene of episode.
It’s basically slasher porn for Karen’s.
/quietly deletes it from queue
Stupid or perfect, every pass.
stupidly perfect
This game may be just the break MLS has been looking for.
Nice of the Cowboys and Eagles to let the Make-A-Wish kids play a couple of series.
Sam Darnold looks around then goes back to coloring in his playbook.
Yet again: NFC East matchups are stoppable forces meeting movable objects
COWBOYS! EAGLES! THE DERPALUTION IS BEING BROADCAST LIVE!
DERP FIGHT
Cowboys…recover?
Jerry Jones handed out the good coke tonight!
That’s what happens when you wear heels you can’t walk in
poor girl, seems like she spends a lot of time on her knees
She’s fallen and she can’t get up!
I legitimately can’t find a picture of her standing up
Oh boy, gonna be one of these
A race to the bottom? Yes. Yes it is.
Ah shit, Wentz got his huntin’ sleeve
Should swap it out during the next series with a “not bein’ a fucking idiot” sleeve
cowboys quarterback is unlocking a long forgotten name in my mind
https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn%3AANd9GcRg4NolaLx12AVOVWCzW3omlcW3NoSacjYQ-w&usqp=CAU
An interesting feature of the Linc is that the wind will actually blow opposing kickers’ attempts back into the correct trajectory
I’D LIKE TO KILL THE CREEP THAT BROKE THE FREAKIN’ MIRROR!
Not for nothing, but open threads need Moose. Brick should back the fuck off.
where has he been?
????
I am also confused at this negative shout out
The over/under on the number of voters who will use the entrance I’m staffing tonight is zero. My advice is to take the under.
Hearing your experience, I guess I’m glad they never called me to be a poll worker
Plus all those single dollar bills!
I’m happy to be doing it but it’s very boring at this location.
Go for the points! Avoid the shutout!
That was a weird sack, but not the weirdest one I’ve seen
Lot of Pennsylvanian youth need a trigger warning on this comment.
In certain genres, you see a lot of weird sacks
Fortunately they got rid of that one and left the normal one.
— L. Armstrong
The Cowboys coaching staff got drunk and said “fuck everything” and I am here for it
Ol’DubbleJ can get behind that kind of thinking.
Like, literally.
Drunk and fuck everything can still win this tirefire of a division.
ONCE YOU GO DINUCCI, YOU NEVER GO BACK!
[is arrested for DUI]
Good evening, Mr. Keim!
Yours is more appropriate.
– Matt Gaetz
Triple reverse all the way!
The Ben DiNucci Era begins!
Good to see Fisky getting that draftkings commercial money
Did they triple-check those Philly fans for batteries and bags of urine at the gates?
once again, I say halloween may be over, but i have way too many costumed pictures delayed, so enjoy
This Geico ad (the chainsaws) always makes me smile.
I really hope Joan Jett made a pile of money for letting SNF ruin “Hate Myself” like that.
She got to appear for 1 second every Sunday last season!
Runaways is an important band. Joan Jett is alright.
I Hate Myself for Needing Rent!
I went Heavy Fulgham tonight. My brain feels like my nostrils after I chop jalapeños and accidentally pick my nose.
LOL this is great
Bad Sports Art is art
https://twitter.com/BadSportsArt
Sigh
bears losing or Simpsons promos?
The NFC East be like:
Needs more explosive diarrhea
Peeled $20+ off The Man with that gahbij time TD from Aiyuk. It’s all already invested in SNF bets. I’m a dope.
Got me $55 and change
What jersey would fit this occasion? Kolb? Asomugha? Murray? Sheppard? Maclin?
Detmer
Sadly of my pathetic collection neither of them are there.
Ty or Koy?
Brees is getting gunslingery in his old age
If we ever needed a hobo killin, it was tonight…
Holy shit, they called forward progress on that fumble? That’s fucking hilarious.
TOUCHDOWN SEAHAWKS
sunday night movie for Giants fans
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-1pVLJl_snc
Derp Bears
OH WONDERFUL. KITTLE IS OUT. THAT WASN’T LIKE WATCHING MY MONEY DISAPPEAR DOWN THAT TUNNEL AT ALL! NOPE! THIS IS JUST FUCKING SPIFFY!!
Banner pic is genius.
So as non-teacher public education staff in Michigan, we’re finally being given hazard pay. …A one time payment of $250 in February. You’d think it’d at least be enough to cover our health insurance deductible. Actual teachers are getting $500, which is somehow even more insulting to them.
The de facto motto of the U.S. is “Fuck you, you poor pieces of shit.”
Trump is down to, “Trump: say you want but he’s got our back.”
“Regardless of anything, we’re pushing a lie. Want it or not?”
Nothing makes me want to disengage from the electoral process like Roger Goodell encouraging me to vote.
I play in a fantasy league with a bunch of others Bengals fans. Picking up the Titans defense from the waiver wire because of everybody else’s denial feels like a cheat code.
That is great.
The only thing worse than rival team’s fans are my team’s fans.
This aged poorly. -4 points
I know I’m false starting this door opening, but I want to call attention to the fact that Andy Dalton was knocked to next Tuesday on a hit that was a 0.7 on the Burfict Scale, but the guy that cheap shotted him can continue his season slightly fined and free to pursue a life of religious fulfillment.
But but but The Shield Cares™ about player health!