Do I seem like a guy that scored 60-ish points in fantasy in two separate leagues yesterday? Because I sure do feel like one. The Matt’s (Stafford and Ryan) can all go to hell! I’m slowly becoming resigned to my inadequacy just like my family did several years back.
Fallout:
-Gus Edward owners rejoice! Or maybe that should be Justice Hill owners? Ravens Ingram and Dobbins got the Covid and I just heard that Theilen did as well. I Want Tuesday Night Football!
-It’s Infrastructure Week for Joe Burrows given that he blew out both his CL’s and had some other things go wrong down there as well.
-Shitty qb play has been a feature of the NFC East for much of the year as the Cowboys have gone thru 4, Team has gone thru three and Dimes has ever so slightly moved the needle towards ‘kinda not’. There’s only one qb that has brought the suck every single week and that’s Wentz. His comp. % is at 58.4 and he’s been sacked 40 times already along with his 14 intercepts.
TO THE GAME!
Rams/Bucs:
-With Donald busting thru the center of the line expect Brady to have a bit of trouble. When he’s under pressure his average pass attempt goes all of 4.4 yards. That tells me that Godwin will get all kinds of targets tonight vs Troy Hill.
-Everyone yaks about Jalen Ramsey so no doubt the other outside cb will get picked on. Not so fast-Darious Williams, a dude who walked on at UAB and was an UDFA for the Ravens is that other guy. He’s been targeted 37 times,(despite dropping back into coverage more than 300 times) has given up 1 TD and has 4 intercepts.
-As the above might hint at, the Rams have given up the 2nd least fantasy points to opposing qb’s.
-Over on the Bucs side, their front seven has 25 sacks already. But it seems like the way to attack them is to go to the tight end. They’ve given up scores to six different fellas that play that spot. So maybe look at Everett and Higbee to find the end zone.
Enjoy the game.
So I see that tonight’s officiating crew is the first time an All-Black crew has worked a game. My question is, what the fuck do the Kiwi National Rugby side know about calling an NFL game?
Also, head ref Jerome Boger looks twenty years older with the beard.
The penalty calls are all hakas? Actually can they do that for real, that would be cool.
One of my favorites. I’m sure every one’s already seen it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z_WEP9ZkpS4
We haz a good game apparently.
All relative
I’ll take ‘An Alabama Wedding’ for $800, Alex.
I’m fascinated with respect to how both OC’s are attacking these superior D’s and have been successful.
Better than that 38-3 shitshow we had a couple weeks ago, anyway.
Just ate four (4) egg rolls and a whole order of fried dumplings with my disgusting fingers out front of the house. I’m not proud.
Was it private no Fronk-lings to annoy you?
In the car. No family members. Listening to “We Got The Beat” by the Go Go’s on a loop. I’m fat.
Cooper Cupp Runneth Over?
That Tampa vs Pittsburgh superbowl would break records for PI calls.
The OKC Bomber always looked like a very intense serial killer, it seems.
Boooo that’s not RoJo
Nor was it ScarJo
Mojo Jojo
General Tojo?
Don’t get Hank Hill’s father started!
Toju, the militant black guy?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uTP1fdFu0c
Jalen Ramsey is gonna have some extremely questionable financial advise for any referees who call in next week.
Answer that Zambian prince’s e-mails already!
LittleRedFournetteDown!
And here I was worried Brady wouldnt still get PI calls.
Fuck Tom Brady with a rusty pitchfork. but, that was attempted homicide.
How do you abandon these uniforms?
?t=1513274601&w=1920&h=1080
Agreed! Think of the parties on the beach with all the bros in Gronk Creamsicle jerseys.
John McKay, the only cool USC guy. Ok, other than OJ.
You have to say that, because OJ will fucking kill you if you don’t.
Allegedly.
TRUE HIPPO STORY! The day of (or after?) the acquittal, I struck the Heisman pose upon entering my first law school lecture of the day.
Law school? Did any of your fellow students even “get” it?
I mean, one of my buddies laughed. Everyone else mostly ignored me, as was the custom.
One of the greatest lines ever.
I’m more inclined to “Well, we couldn’t run, we couldn’t pass, so we made up for it by not tackling.”
WCS: “This cat by the name of ‘Seamus’. Does it have any offspring?”
Shelter Employee: “You’re kidding, right?”
Come on, i only need like 60 RoJo points to win
Henry Ellard has aged gracefully.
Ok, so I know what the “T&T” in AT&T means…
DYNOMITE!
‘Sup Lil?
Evening, Colonel.
I’ll never forget that time she tried to make out with me in an elevator, and I was like “no, sorry, I’m married.”
Probably my fave entry in your “Nocturnal Emissions” diary.
One time a stripper wanted me to pay her $100 to jerk me off and I said I was married and she laughed and came back with “everyone in here is married!” and I said “OK, I’m also cheap” and we laughed and laughed.
High school bud of mine, never finished HS, started a fencing company that remains wildly successful 40 years later and made him a millionaire.
He and his wife had two daughters, one named Crystal and one named Amber. I thought was a little bit on the nose as far as foreshadowing a pole-dancing career, but they both have their PhDs in science/engineering fields from TX A&M and are very successful in their fields. So ya just never know…
All the cool uniforms these teams have and we get pewter and yard sale white.
All the excitement of Brad Johnson and Mike Alstott!
Another entry in the ledger titled “Roger Goodell is a National Disgrace”
It’s not just the dinginess, it’s those cheap plastic peel and stick numbers that I really hate.
Mike Evans is a goddamn man.
cool twitter thread with
songs for the
Ratatouille Musical
ROCKIN’
https://twitter.com/missbreton/status/1330012430802448384
Ok, that was an impressive Evansdown.
“Great touchdown pass!”
-Tom Brady’s thought bubble
Wifey found a cat up for adoption named Seamus about 30 minutes from here.
Likes Meow Mix and freezer vodka?
Oh this is gonna end well.
“It drank all my liquor and keeps getting involved with slutty alley cats!”
Was it hitting on the receptionist at the shelter?
“Your cat said I could stay til Christmas”
-the Wendy’s cashier half-asleep on your couch
It’s nickname will be Mark I assume.
Keep it away from nazi cats
“I’ve never seen a cat react like that when Green Day comes on the radio!”
Dude
He will bring joy to us all, just like tWBS did. A few more furballs, but that’s a small price to pay.
Probably about the same tbh
First almost nothing PI.
Can’t help but think that Brady got a participation ribbon after he ran the 40 at the combine.
Honestly I think I might have had him.
Are these those “super spreaders” that Recovery Whiskey mentioned earlier?
Donald’s being doubled and the pocket still collapsed
You can’t see his wedding ring because it’s halfway the blonde’s esophagus.
TIGER WOODS!
Spam I assume you are one of those Rams fans on the screens there. Please be the Elvis one.
If it’s Elvis circa August ’77, then yes.
I got poorly-managed facial hair, but otherwise twinsies.
Can you croon?????
Gimme some bourbon and a peanut butter and banana sandwich and you’ll find out.
LION FOREST!
I’m half the distance to the ‘go’ right now.
KOOP KIPPER
MEL KIPER
CUPPER COUP
Copper Coupe
A bunch of super spreaders in the audience.
Fucking Florida, man.
Jared Goff has 39 wins because Aaron Donald is the MVP of the league during that time.
Aaron Donald is the baddest of men.
RRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
How the fuck ya doin, etc?
jamin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tH4p_MX4YG8&feature=youtu.be
I need the Rams D to get 19 points or less tonight to hold on to my lead.
After that last drive I would say my confidence is as shaky as Hippo waiting in line at the pharmacy.
I need 3 pts from something called a Gerald Everett tonight.
He’s actually getting more targets than Higbee the last 3 weeks.
It’s in Hippo’s waiver confusing league.
They really should change all the rules in their league to accommodate the two of us. smgh…
This one’s foar Scotchee
So you’re saying the Giants have an Outside chance of making the playoffs?
It seems the Eagles need to tank now for a qb. Dakota Jesus is just confused and seeing ghosts now.
LOL all the experts picked Fins over horses on sunday
Went heavy on the premise that Ramsey shuts down Evans tonight . Adjust your wagers accordingly.
-mush-
/thought of a joke on the way home
“Hits and Mrs: The Janay Rice Story.”
In forty nine minutes? The liquor stores close in Virginia. Plan ahead.
Seriously? I need more warning than that!
(glad I picked up a back-up bottle of Makers 46 yesterday)
Penis.
Sir, this is an Arby’s…
Sorry. Do you “have the penis?”
Whatever. Can I get extra cheese on that?
excited for xmas decorations
to start showing up
I feel like there is a He-Man action figure missing. Is there anyone who has read the book that can verify?
The inside of rockingdog’s house was almost exactly as I had pictured it.
Where’s Naked Barbie?
How many antibiotic resistant strains of STDs are coursing through Gronk’s veins?
Yes
If all the STDs fight each other, they can’t fight Gronk!
found a funny:
Pretty wild how “decadent” used to mean “empire in decline” and now means “chocolatey”
Welp, I found out I’ve been exposed to COVID-19.
Yesterday, the football gods killed my soul.
Today, COVID-19 goes in for whatever’s left.
That’s what you get for building Cinergy Field on top of an old ligament graveyard smh
Nah, I think Riverfront Stadium was built over a bunch of poor people’s homes and their factories where they worked…and now I get why Cincinnati is cursed.
Hope you test negative
I’m recovering from a cold, but I had no fever or aches. Only a slight sore throat, a bit of congestion and a slight cough from the sore throat.
If that was COVID, I need to be studied because I have a partial immunity to it or something. Either that or prehypertension and a BMI hovering around 30 is the cure.
“I love the Cure!”
-D. Carr, from behind his locked bedroom door
If its the 30 BMI, my quaren-fifteen is going to come in handy
Still don’t want any of my imaginary Internet friends to get it
Feeling good re my VERY amateUr doctoring, as I called “all 3 ligaments borked” for Burrow, based on the gross RedZone replay.
Seems a stand-up dude, too. Hate it for him, but have no doubt he will come back.
>stand up dude
Not right now though…
THIS COMMENT I CALL IT SCORING IN THE LAST TWO MINUTES AGAINST PAUL GUENTHER DEFENSE BECAUSE IT WAS JUST TOO DAMNED EASY.
The outer sides of his thigh and calf touched. Even my C- in High School Human A&P says those two body parts aren’t supposed to do that.
Taking my doggo to NC State tomorrow to run tests to determine how serious his cancer is. Hoping it’s at a treatable stage
“So we’ll just get your dog some pain pills–huh, could’ve sworn they were in this drawer. That’s where we usually keep them”
/Tires squeal from the parking lot, followed by faint Hippo laughing
Fingers crossed for you.
Hey, man! I had no idea you were another North Cakalakian!
NC State’s vet hospital is amazing, in both the level and compassionate-ness of the care. Kruger’s brother cat (JT) underwent a clinical trial for his blood clot thingy a couple years ago. Ultimately, he did pass, but they bought him/us 3 extra good months – and more importantly, allowed us to know we did everything within our power for the little guy.
All the good thoughts for your pup.
They really are great, our rabbit’s cancer was treated there and they even found grants to help cover the costs. The rabbit died, because you know, cancer. But the docs and staff were wonderful.
Happy Max Headroom day.