One blowout, one sorta interesting tilt and one helluva slugfest (though it could go blowout as well). Seems like a typical 4 O’ Clocker in there’s not much choice.
TO THE GAMES!
Jets/Rams:
Who are you taking-Aaron Donald’s league-dominating 75 pressures or the Jets 31st ranked O-line? Rb Akers has a stranglehold on ‘lead dog’ status in the Rams backfield as they (and you) play the important games. He’s had some nice production with 50 carries over the last 2 games. If you’re looking to stream a tight end (and the majority of you probably are) you could do worse than Higbee or Everett given that this New York squadoo can’t defend the position at all and has given up more TD’s to that spot than anyone else.
Eagles/Cards:
Hurts had 14 designed runs and 4 scrambles for 106 yards last week in their upset win over the Saints and you can expect more of the same as Philly heads down the stretch. Must be nice having this sort of wild card that teams, even though they now have a bit of game film, will still likely have trouble defending his tendencies. On t’udder side expect Hopkins to get double-digit targets as the Cards exploit a very weak Eagles coverage unit. Kyler has worried fantasy owners and fans alike by running only 5 times in each of weeks 11-13 but bounced back with 13 gallops last week.
Chiefs/Saints:
This is one for all the eyeballs. Too bad Mikey Thomas has been put on the shelf like an elf-Brees will likely need all the horses he can get his hands on if he’s to keep up with K.C. No matter what Kamara’s pass-catching prop is, take that over. That Mahomes kid just keeps on doing things-he has the 2nd-most 20+ yard completions, he has the highest qb rating under pressure and takes sacks at one of the lowest rates in the league. For a dude that goes for the big play as often as he does, he sure protects the ball well, don’t he? It may not be wise to start CE-H though-in his last 4 of 5 he’s averaged 3.5 ypc or less. I haven’t seen the phrase ‘hit the rookie wall’ yet so I’m calling dibs.
Hammer that keyboard like the god/goddesses you are.
So have the Patriots and the Browns switched placed for the next decade?
I’m on board with that. Like a Freaky Freddie Kitchens Friday kind of thing.
So when the Rams and Jaguars made the Jalen Ramsey trade did the Rams agree to owe the Jags a favor at a later date to be cashed in any time? Honestly, it might be the most logical explanation.
“Coughlin would be dumb enough to take that deal.”
-J Ramsey
Looka the fuckin’ Jets wrecking everyone’s survivor pool.
Imagine having survived by the skin of your teeth with a Raiders pick two weeks ago and then having the Jets kill you now.
This is the middle of a 5 game sandwich for the Rams.
Y’all will get a kick out of this. My junior year of college. Was taking 20 credits of physics, math, and medieval tech at the time
STRONG jacket game!
Still have it of course, and you ain’t seen the back OR the cuffs
True, but the Minor Threat patch speaks VOLUMES!?
Gotta rep DC!
Were you Straight Edge in college?
Not at all, but was fine with those who were
I like the touch of blue in your hair!
The really funny part is, I was interning at a defense contractor during the summers, so I would buzz it for the summer and grow it out, then do mohawks, bihawks, chelsea cuts, all sorts of things and various colors during the school year
Man — it must be cool to be smart.
It was kinda accidentally smart, the ex-military I worked with thought the short hair and the fact that I got in at 7 am meant I was hard working and dedicated. Nope!
Easy to show up first at work when you don’t go to sleep the night before
Poseur. I kid I kid
Teh Hippo likes a diff track from them, but since Zymm brought it up.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZyaK3jo4Sl4
I visited Zipperhead in 1990 like a GD tourist
Interesting rules question in the Chiefs-Saints game.
Aqib Talib is doing color commentary for the Cardinals-Eagles game and all I say there is a cultural divide in the r/NFL game thread.
Talib is great! He’s like Romo.
Get him on MNF.
I don’t want to listen to his commentary because I don’t want my hatred of him diluted by concerns that there might be racist overtones to it.
In other words, I want to maintain purity.
There are parts of reddit no one should ever go to, i.e. most of it
Truffle shuffle first down denied
FAT MAN FRIST DOWN
Or not.
I think my experience in small punk show mosh pits qualifies me to be a tackling coach, as long as they don’t mind me being drunk on the job
Elbows up, absorb hits, transfer energy.
Avoid the big guys
Any excuse.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DsoAfiqOmdA
about 90% chance I was at this show
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muuAw2OpnKQ
cling to the front wall and let the pit go behind you. shove when required
I find the amount of mosh pit experience on DFO pretty assuring
Bunch of lefty gen xers
The Rams are behind by 10, but still have an insurmountable lead somehow
Line is 17.5. 4 tds. I do believe that this can happen.
I wouldn’t bet the farm on it. They look pitiful enough to get blown out by the Jets!
Our 4-1 matchup is looking like a STRONG upset by our 7-7 4-seed.
I may limp into the final is Kelce doesn’t further blow up but I’m dead next week regardless.
Thought you all should know.
[fantasizes about Kelce stepping on a land mine]
CBS just showed the old footage of Andy Reid as Santa Claus. Awesome.
Ok, I actually kinda like Talib as an announcer
#MeToo
/as Donks homer, am super-biased though
Murray with the handoff of the year
Fizzy wine: Coupe, Flute, or other?
I vote coupe. Flutes look cool, but you don’t get the aroma of all those little bubbles.
Arrow upwards.
Yes, coupe. Flutes are the worst if you’re even slightly nasally endowed. And I am!
I was reading something that was proposing using something like a brandy snifter. Captures the aroma, but also doesn’t let it burn out quickly
Tenn is 10-4, Good Buddy!
R Tannehill’s Ten yeas are making Gase look that much worse.
Someone needs to check if Patrick Mahomes isn’t from a different dimension or something.
I would probably like him a lot if he played for anyone but an AFC West team.
I still do like him, but hate myself for it (AFCW factor)
The absolute best I will ever be able to do while he plays for KC is to not hate him.
Sell out.
He’s just a normal dude back there, but he has an advance copy of “Madden Earth 2020 3D”
Would explain the voice.
He’s from the Quadroon Dimension
Akavit cocktails anyone have ideas?
Never used it. But given the caraway component, I’m thinking rye would be a good companion.
For my missus, I went cran, ginger and lime. She seems happy. (she is Danish)
I would try apple juice if you have some. Or do a sour
I’ve only ever drank it straight. Might also work directly into your veins.
Man, is this late slate a bag of shit. Though the Jest winning will maybe keep me awake.
NC State gets 4-6 Kenfucky in the Gator Bowl! 2020, y’all.
/hey, at least Vasco won HAIL GAMBLOR
I like Tua. I think I will halfheartedly like the Dolphins while he’s their QB.
Half-heartedly liking the dolphins is being a true fan
It’s hard to imagine feeling wholehearted about anything related to the Dolphins – love, hate, interest, etc. They’re like if Generation X was a football team.
I’m not sure how I feel about this comment.
Oof. That gif is too short.
Another
Dolphins fans rooting for them in the 90s marino years knowing they’d just loose to Buffalo in the playoffs
When I was in 7th grade I read Newsweek regularly and was really sad I was too young to be Gen X. Middle school was an odd time.
Jalen Hurts TD! Wooooooo!
(Meaningless fifth place game but wooooo)
#MeToo
If Brees isn’t wearing chainmail under his pads, I will be very disappoint
Definitely the best way to improve his Armor Class, given his lack of high Dexterity.
For what he’s paid, you would think he could get something with a couple decent enchantments, even if he hasn’t picked up anything legendary during his various quests
Russell Wilson maxed out his Charisma.
Big Ben used INT as his dump stat.
Mahomes is one of those guys who managed to convince his DM that he totally rolled all those 18s at home yesterday.
Brady, of course, is that NPC who your DM adores, and fudges all the die rolls so that he miraculously makes every savings throw.
At first it looked like Tyreek Hill was getting a massage while hitting a hookah; but then the shot panned out and he was actually drinking a mini airplane-sized bottle of schnapps.
Nice sippy cup tech
Jalen Hurts must watch a lot of film, because he’s having a lot of success with the strategy of just getting rid of the ball as fast as possible, aka avoiding being Wentzed
I am making the bed, and it’s taking me so long that I am redefining what the expression “goldbricking” means.
What are you making it out of?
Is English Aqib Talib’s 1st language?
In Civilization, battering Rams are ineffective against Jets. It’s interesting (although likely temporary) to see this dynamic at play in the NFL as well!
A ram could totally knock a jet over off its landing gear, resulting in billions of dollars of damage.
True, but you gotta catch the jet undefended on the ground
Gase trying to get fired.
This Jets team is special.
Jets celebrating the recertification of the 737-MAX
Zymm you were formerly a traveler. Any trepidations about flying on that? Personally, I don’t care, I am sure to have flown on planes that wouldn’t have passed.
Most planes are older than you. Its fine.
Damn Boomers will never retire.
They try to use sprays and such, but they can never recapture that ‘new plane’ smell
Zymm is Gozer?
Not particularly, I was probably on a few back when the MCAS was still fucked, so not worried about the improved version. Hell, I’ve been on matrushkas in the Caucacus which are many orders of magnitude more dangerous without blinking. Only reason I would avoid the MAX is if it has a shitty seating config
NFC East trying to suck there way to primetime games in the final weeks
What in the actual fuck was that?
Bell was down, but I do enjoy chaos touchdowns.
Brees not looking good in the early going.
.
Ho ho ho indeed!
The vagrants that the Eagles picked up to play in the secondary are not good at tackling. Beats surviving in Northern Ontario IMO.
The Gang Play Prevent
Unlike me, my water heater is getting a workout today.
Well, that might have screwed over some people in Vegas…
it shouldnt San Fran was -5.5 and the over was 45
Happy Christmas, genitals!
Charlie “Christmas” Day is the gift that keeps on giving.
When bills can’t tailgate anymore they improvise
I don’t know, looks more like a Browns fan to me
Has Janeane ever played a full season as a starter?
Dallas wins
Moar NFC East CHAOS!
Yeah! Lamb with a cheap TD too.
It would be funny if the Jets beat the Rams and it kept them out of the playoffs, but it seems like the Rams have just about clinched already so it’s probably moot.
Another safety dance!
The C team announcers are out for the Quards, Jests game. Who are these guys?
Tepid take: Meh, some dudes? Whatever
Aqib Talib.
#guardyochainz
Here come the Jets!
-the Twin Towers, bracing for impact
“Did someone say something about some Hos?”
.
I already know how terrible I look, thanks.
goooo GOFFFF
RAMMMIT!!!!
Chiefs at Saints: Drew Brees reportedly has no idea how healed up his ribs are due to radiation issue – CBSSports.com
Yeah, this won’t end good.
oh shit
Was he working at Chernobyl?
Maybe he should heal his ribs with the power of ADVOCARE
Is that the pyramid scheme he is involved with? I do remember him being involved in some sort of shady business.
I dunno if it’s a pyramid scheme, but it sure as shit shady as fuck.
Sounds like the origin of a superhero movie.
Crumbling bone is a symptom of contact radiation sickness….some of those girls who painted the radium clock dials basically ended up without jaws
Phossy jaw. Sooooo gross, don’t google it!