Hello there fellow DFO’er. Hope you’re well today. And thanks for coming back to see last weeks comments of the week as decided by my brain. There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t.
While I love having a long weekend, it always takes me a day or two after to figure out what day it is. So today is Monday in most of my brain but a small part of it keeps saying “It’s fucking Tuesday” so I’m extra confused today. Not that I normally know which day of the week it is. The working from home days just kinda blend together after a while for me. It’s a work day or its not is as far as I get with it. The actual day of the week, meh, I’ll figure it out if I need to. Aka look at the phone to see what week day it is for the 97th time that day.
And Holy shit Jon Gruden. This is a perfect example, to me, of that you can saw whatever the fuck you want, but in doing, so there can be consequences. It isn’t cancel culture, it’s consequence culture and I’m all for it. /Steps off soapbox.
Also, I’ve loving how Shank;lor is appearing in most games lately. I’ve lost track of the kicks missed just this last week.
As a reminder, this post will cover comments made up to and through the Saturday Night Open Thread. Sunday comments stand alone and Monday comments will go on the next week’s post. Note that during the offseason, I’ll probably look at the Sunday posts.
Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.
I have a weather radar app and SoCal is going to get with a second wave of thunderstorms in a short while.
Brick Meathook
Worst. Submarine. Story. Ever.
scotchnaut
“And the Raiders have a pulse here!”
So I guess Lyle Alzado isn’t in the building.
SonOfSpam
Facebook Data Center earlier:
Sharkbait
Kid has to watch “Brokeback Mountain” for one of her college classes (something about critical race theory probably) and she’s using my Amazon Prime account to watch it for free.
Looking forward to the “if you got horny watching THAT movie, boy do we have some cool stuff for you” recommendations.
SonOfSpam
I’m in weight loss mode these days but had chicken wings on the weekend. I guess I just went through my own “Lightening Delay”.
scotchnaut
The Matron Saint: “There is a sea of black here”
Brian Griese: (inhales)
Producer: “Cut his mic”
Horatio Cornblower
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Dr. Nick is prescribing ivermectin, and I say that with 110% certainty.
Not for covid, just in general.
Senor Weaselo
I hate piling on and publicity stunts.
However,
Don T
THIS URBAN MEYER, I CALL HIM RURAL NOW, ‘CAUSE HIS WIFE’S GONNA PUT HIS ASS OUT TO PASTURE REAL SOON
The Maestro
Found a funny;
i have stolen over 4 terabytes of NFTs via the little known hacker technique known as “right click -> save as”. my collection has a net estimated value of over 8 trillion dollars
rockingdog
Seeing October baseball means one thing. It’s almost hockey season!
Sharkbait
Gumbygirl
Damn those Pollocks!
Mr. Ayo
Especially this one!
Doktor Zymm
god dammit i love the passive aggressive tone to the whole thing
Game Time Decision
I was about to say the same thing, but since you already did, I’ll just keep it to myself. It’s fine. Really.
Warthog
Oh, that’s funny, because I was going to say something similar as well, but… no, no. Please. You go ahead. Yes, it’s my post, but by all means. Go for it.
Anthony In TX
I wish you guys would just…you know what? Never mind. It’s fine. Do what you want.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
I am genetically required to root for the P*ts since I’m from the next town over from Foxboro; however, my second NFL team is Houston, and has been since I moved here in 1976. So, you aren’t totally alone.
Viva La Tabula Raza
As long as one has the voices in one’s head, one is NEVAR alone!
King Hippo
/Punches the ‘Please Login’ bouncer in the balls
//enters clubhouse
///tips hat
Evening, Swamp Folk.
Horatio Cornblower
Pete Carroll doesn’t feel too confident with Geno Smith in the game, but he’s consoling himself that at least they’re not playing Pittsburgh. He knows a Jet can’t bring down Steelers.
Dunstan
I don’t think Russell Wilson gets nearly the credit he deserves for the discipline he has for scoring on the field and not scoring off it.
scotchnaut
THIS BOTTLE OF WINE I JUST OPENED I CALL IT AN ANTIVAXXER WITH THE MISFORTUNE OF HAVING BEEN PUT ON A VENTILATOR AT A HOSPITAL THAT IS RUN BY THE DEEP STATE CAUSE I’M GONNA GIVE IT A LITTLE TIME TO BREATHE AND THEN I’M GONNA KILL IT.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
My eyes right now: “These Seattle uniforms are torturing me!”
My ears right now: “Um.. I’m dealing with Joe Buck and Troy Aikman.”
Eyes: “Ok, you win.”
Dunstan
The Dr. Mrs. is currently telling her brother about how their sister-in-law confided to us that she really wants to retire in Scottsdale. They’re right to mock her.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
THIS GUY RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY I CALL HIM AN UNVACCINATED NBA POWER FORWARD WHO HAS BECOME A MEDIA DARLING BECAUSE HE’S HAVING A GREAT WEEK COMMENTING BUT NOT SO MUCH WHEN IT COMES TO POSTING.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Urban Meyer: “Great, so I’m the most hated NFL coach now.”
Jon Gruden: “Hold my Corona.”
Dunstan
Two more of my wonderful contacts/people announced their retirement today.
The turnover in the last 17 months has been crazy.
Not the company at all. Just these people got used to working from home. They got used to not having to commute.
[editors note] have you ever commuted on the LA freeway system during rush hour? Huh? What! Huh? Fuck you! Who could blame them?
I went to the main campus the other day for the first time in like 8 months and they asked for my badge number.
I gave it to them.
Dude says “I think you’re missing a couple of digits on that.”
Buddy next to him says: “No dude, I had a guy with a number like that last week!”
yeah right: “I’ve been here since 2000, so I’m kind of old school.”
Dudes: “Whoa!”
I didn’t have the heart to tell them that I had already been working the previous 14 years in the industry prior to that.
yeah right
I just had a conversation with my actor neighbor and he was all over the place. I think he must have been really, really high.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
So he’s gonna forget to call you when your table is ready.
Spur
This is an E6B Flight Computer that was sent as a gift to me by tWBS. It was his father’s, who owned a Cessna.
This is high quality aluminum, whereas most E6Bs are made of cardboard.
It was a lovely gift, and totally tWBS. I tried to pay for it but tWBS always refused. That was Mark.
I met him again at the Frolic Room in Hollywood (on a DFO pub crawl) and offered to pay the $25 shipping cost but he refused it.
Mark was a good guy. His gift has a good home.
Brick Meathook
Hey lookit this little stinker! Just adopted her today, and she’s adapting beautifully. She was at the pound for three weeks (no-kill shelter) so she ONLY wants to be outside for now. Hasn’t hit the food to hard yet, but has already hopped up on both couches and our bed, so I think she knows she’s home. Played it SUPER cool with MurderCat, who was just looking for an excuse to start some shit. Feels good to know she’s gonna wake up tomorrow unsure of where she is, and then remember, “That’s right! I have a new family! FUCK! YES!” Mutts are the best.
Fronkenshteen
The moment rescue dogs realize that their life got better forever is such an incredible moment. I have a friend who adopted a badly abused dog and you could see it dawn on her–after MONTHS of work by my friend–that she would be loved for the rest of her life and would never, ever get kicked again was so beautiful. She went from being super aggressive to being the sweetest, friendliest dog and would never turn down a belly rub.
NO YOU’RE CRYING
Anthony In TX
Fans: “Oklahoma has to drive down the field so they can kick a field goal.”
Commentators: “Oklahoma has to drive down the field so they can kick a field goal.”
Oklahoma: “We have to drive down the field so we can kick a field goal.”
Texas: “WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY GONNA DO?!”
Redshirt
Gumbygirl is NOT a morning person. If you insist on me getting up at the crack of dawn, you must be prepared for massive amounts of pissing and moaning. Whining and kvetching. Bitching and complaining. Grousing and grizzling. Crying and whinging. General unpleasantness. Intermittent violence. Explosive diarrhea.
Gumbygirl
It’s kind of nice to have a weekend where there’s no natural disaster actively occurring, or even imminent.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Um, you wanna use your indoor voice there, Rikki?
ballsofsteelandfury
And now, Senor Weaselo, smooth talker.
Scene: Senor has just finished playing a funeral precessional and the wife of the deceased is paying him and thanking him for being there.
SW: Once again, my condolences, and, all the best. (Wife nods and walks off)
SW: And… peace be with you?
Senor Weaselo
I saw a condensed version of this commercial while watching a show about puppies this morning.
Shouldn’t this be on during a Lifetime movie or some shit like that?
TheRevanchist
It’s like an SNL sketch, but without the jokes. Wait, that makes it exactly like an SNL sketch.
herodotus450
Here’s another submarine story. I hope these don’t bore you.
This is the “XOs door” story.
I was on a missile submarine, also known as a “boomer” and we had very set schedules, unlike most other warships. It was hard duty, but we would have a celebration on “halfway night” which I could write volumes about.
The skipper (who was off limits for any pranks) and the Executive Officer (XO, second in command) both had their own tiny yet individual staterooms.
On halfway night, it was a tradition among the forward crewmen to lure the XO to some minor crisis and then remove and hide the door to his stateroom.
I have no idea how they did this. Everything on a submarine is exposed; there are nooks and crannies to hide hooch but a door is another thing altogether.
And the XO would search for his door. There was never any disciplinary threat, just a cat and mouse game.
After 24 hours the door would mysteriously be reinstalled at the XOs stateroom.
This process might be the greatest secret in the very secret submarine service.
Brick Meathook
Evening, everyone. Quick story (it has a moral):
My kid (she is 21 because dammit I am old) is currently seeing the double bill of Rancid and Dropkick Murphys. which respectively elicit a “cool” and “meh” from me. The tickets were free, donated by my wife’s co-worker/friend who suddenly realized yesterday she wouldn’t be able to go. Why, you ask? Because she hadn’t bothered to read the fine print, and the venue (I’m in Commiefornia) requires either proof of vaxx or proof of very recent expensive COVID test. My wife’s friend (and her sig other) have neither, as they are in the rightwing news bubble. (The rapid tests that are done at clinics with official paper results are at least $100 unless a Dr refers you)
So instead, my daughter and boyfriend get to see this show for free on a lovely cool Southern California evening.
A funny postscript: Friend of boyfriend said “hey that sounds fun, I’ll get a couple tix and go too” and he bought the tix and OOPS he’s also an uivaxxed MAGAt and was looking to offload them last I heard.
SonOfSpam
I saw a great TikTok featuring a physician that discussed how vaccine mandates don’t take away your rights, they take away your access to privileges. It was a really well-explained, well-reasoned argument that will only satisfy vaccine proponents and won’t mean a single thing to anti-vaxxers.
Anthony In TX
Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.
Stay busy and safe out there.
NOTE banner image from here
Going into last week’s fantasy matchup I had in my starting lineup:
Russell Wilson, Saquan Barkley, George Kittle and Ju-Ju Smith Schuster.
I must have pissed off our fantasy football deity or something because that’s some fucked up shit.
Gumby has a guy in his league who got 27 points. Total. It was a weird week.
I hit 148 and lost to Horatio…
New team name is “The tub club”, right?
I’m awake at 9 am. I blame Hippo. He has fucked with my finely tuned circadian rhythm. He will pay!
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