Your Maestro(Tabula?)/Reverend (Pats/Bills) Darby and Open Thread

That first game. Wow, what a doozy! That play midway through the third quarter? Amazing! JK, I’m composing this 1 1/2 hours before the first tilt even starts.

To The Game!

Pats/Bills:

-Is McDermott at a place in his coaching career where he can beat Old Bill twice in one season? Sure, he did it last season. (it was a trick question)

-Last time these teams played the Bills placed their lb’s almost directly behind the d-line, daring Macaroon Jones to beat them through the air. He did not.

-As a matter of factoid, Jones has tossed up as many picks (5) in his last four games as he did in the first ten games of the season.

-As noted before, Daboll finally trusting Singletary for multiple series in a row has resulted in the latter averaging almost 100 yards from scrimmage over the last four games. In my opinion, this is the last piece of Buffalo’s puzzle-to be able to run time off the clock when they need to.

-Feeling Their Oats? (no idea what that means) The Bills have won three of their last four vs the Pats. Before that they had lost 35 of the last 40.

-I’m thinking there might be a few frozen balls bouncing off the arms and chest of a few Buffalo pass catchers tonight. It’s not going to be “Canada Cold” but it will be cold enough.

-If the Pats play man (which is a rumor going round-likely started by Bill himself, that wily old codger) look for Allen to run a bit more than usual.

Play nice in the comments.

5 2 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
368 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Sharkbait
LemonJello

comment image

Did somebody get addicted to winning playoff games?

Horatio Cornblower

This could be turning into a historically bad postseason beatdown for the Pats.

I’m not sure my (sweat)pants are going to be on much longer.

The Maestro

A reminder that the official NFL rulebook does not mention pass rushers using ice picks as illegal even a single time.

Horatio Cornblower

comment image?resize=500%2C526&ssl=1

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Greetings, everyone. I would first like to extend a warm congratulations to Redshirt, and join everyone in wishing him a speedy recovery after the stroke he no doubt suffered after that roughing-the-passer call late in the 4th quarter of the earlier game. Second, I would like to assure everyone that I am not upset at the outcome of the game; I’m just proud of the Raiders for making lemonade out of a lemon of a season and going down swinging. Third, I would like to get started drinking, so I’ll be proceeding forthwith.

comment image

King Hippo

Y’all even seemed like good sports at the end, WHA HAPPEN TO THAT FRANCHISE I RECALL FROM THE 1980s??

Gumbygirl

I’ll be joining you tomorrow on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams.

King Hippo

Tomorrow is HATE DAY (MRSA Dreamboat, The Ben and His Very Grey Greypenis), bracketed around what should be a real cracker between the Non-Gendereds and the Tomsulas.

Horatio Cornblower

The whole thread is hilarious. Not sure why Brady tagged along, was just going for Allen.

Doktor Zymm

The Andy Dalton one!!

LemonJello

The Drew Lock one got me laughing.

Doktor Zymm

So you can now dox people by chucking an apple watch really hard against their house?

Sharkbait

At least one Mac is cooking tonight. LOBSTER MAC!

comment image

Horatio Cornblower

Outstanding.

WCS

comment image

Gumbygirl

I hope you made enough for all of us. Or at least enough for me!

Brocky

comment image

Horatio Cornblower

I remember that -59 wind chill game. Maybe should have called that one. When it’s warmer on Mars you probably don’t need to be outside.

King Hippo

Game Recognize Game, yo!!!

Doktor Zymm

Considering how close my birthplace (Rochester) is to Buffalo, I am considering going with the Bills as my primary fandom until Dan Snyder is no longer the owner of Team (hopefully through a painful accident and ensuing bankruptcy). Think I will let this game decide it, win and it will be so.

Gumbygirl

I always have a sidepiece. It soothes your soul to have someone decent to root for, when your team shits the bed.

Brocky

I don’t have a dedicated second team. Just whoever knocks my whichever disliked team out of the playoffs that year

Gumbygirl

Nothing like some good hating!

King Hippo

Black Panthers is kind of mine, given I am a Charlotte native. I wonder if I would have liked them had they existed during my childhood?

rockingdog

Yea Patriots are not looking rocking
Kinda yikes

Sharkbait

Not…a great start.

clint greasewood

comment image

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Brian Daboll on a mission

robertson-liverpool.gif
The Maestro

This fucking sucks. I want my money back. No, I didn’t pay anything but I still want it back.

Brocky

This is what I said when they mentioned brady during the subway commercial

Gumbygirl

I get it. I will be feeling this way tomorrow!

4bb07c9ae8290c49b5613f1f4c44348c.jpg
makeitsnowondem

Buffalo’s decided to only do highlight reel shit I guess.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Gotta tear their hearts out early. Demoralize them. CRUSH THE TESICLES AND THE HEART WILL FOLLOW!

LemonJello

comment image

Horatio Cornblower

If I weren’t doing Dry January, and if I were suicidal, I’d suggest we do a shot every time they mention the weather.

Mr. Ayo

Ian just said rumbling! SHOT!

Mr. Ayo

Accumulation! SHOT!

Mr. Ayo

Parting seas! SHOT!

WCS

comment image

Mr. Ayo

TIDE! SHOT!

Mr. Ayo

FRIGID! SHOT!

Gumbygirl

Hi, just got home. Did I miss anything?

Horatio Cornblower

You owe me $35 million. We bought a lair.

The Maestro

Nobody disturb me. I’m in the tower of solitude. Because I’m, uh, crying… in there.

LemonJello

That was a quick shower, Mr. Carr.

Gumbygirl

Ooh, I want a lair! But $35 mill?

FGqlgxwXwAAozEe.jpeg
rockingdog

Bills corner Hyde that got an INT that was Rocking! 💪

LemonJello

I think Redshirt ran through the clubhouse in full tiger paint with only a Bengals bandana around his wing-wang.

Gumbygirl

Is Rikki still with us?

Doktor Zymm

Yes, but he is sitting in the corner wearing actual clothes with nary a bandana in sight

LemonJello

He could turn down his earbuds. Not all of us want to hear his Derek Carr playlist tonight.

Gumbygirl

He will be EMO tional.

The Maestro

I am gonna go Scotchy if this keeps up.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Macerception

archer-stop-my-penis-can-only-get-so-erect.gif
Horatio Cornblower

Are the officials not allowed to wear gloves? Because being barehanded in weather like this is stupid and dangerous.

WCS

DIS IS FOOBAWL YOU NERD ITS MANS WETTER AND SPORTS NERD I BET U THINK NOBUMMER IS REELY MERICAKN AND BYEDEN DIDNT STEEL FROM TRUMP

Horatio Cornblower

Ah, if you were paying attention earlier you’d know I’m drinking cocoa and wearing puffy slippers, so I think I’ve already answered your question.

Doktor Zymm

You know the saying “cold hands, warm heart”? Flip that around to the contrapositive

rockingdog

OMG
What an INT!!!

Horatio Cornblower

That was insane. Hyde literally took that off the receivers helmet.

Mr. Ayo

SUDDEN LEGEND OF WHITE MAC CHANGE!

LemonJello

Pickerception Buffalo!

comment image

Horatio Cornblower

Anyone else see the Heist episodes about the Pappy Van Winkle theft in 2013? Just saw it last night. It’s sort of hilarious, and on Netflix. Worth checking out.

rockingdog

Bolden with the big drop
That’s notRocking

ballsofsteelandfury

Puebla GOL!

The Maestro

FACK YOU FACK YOU FACK YOU FACK YOU THIS IS NAWT FAYAH OAH JUST

NO ONE DENIES THIS

Brick Meathook

APPLE WATCH: So your head is above water?
VICTIM: Yes, that’s how I’m talking to you, dickhead.

Gumbygirl

She should have said “glub glub glub!”

rockingdog

LOL
The pats DEF did NOT show up for that first drive

Last edited 2 years ago by rockingdog
King Hippo

This is “Good Brokeback” and the P*ts is fucked.

Doktor Zymm

Another pair of teams here where I wouldn’t mind either one advancing. It’ll be kind of nice tomorrow when I can legit root against someone

Horatio Cornblower

The 49ers, right Zymm?

comment image

Right, Zymm?

Doktor Zymm

Even that adorable kitten is no match for my disdain for the cow sheaths. Super cute though, a really excellent kitten

Gumbygirl

Lemme guess who you’re talking about!

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

They always were…

Doktor Zymm

Buffalo did a running! Good idea buffalish!

Spur
Last edited 2 years ago by Spur
ballsofsteelandfury

Puebla taking on Tigres right now. I know what’s on the second screen at Litre’s house!

Horatio Cornblower

Porn?

Doktor Zymm

Ok inflight wifi, let’s see how you do! If I complain that a receiver had all day and all he had to do was go snatch that ball out of the air where it has been frozen in place that’ll be why

rockingdog

LOL

9AED2C1D-97AE-482D-A410-4C44F8D2EDE8.jpeg
ballsofsteelandfury

I like Carr, but that last throw was a Ben “I don’t care what anyone says, I’m going to force it in there” Roethlisberger pass.

Horatio Cornblower

It really was “Eh, no one thought we’d even get this far anyway”

LemonJello

The Sex Cannon nods in appreciation.

rockingdog

Pats Defense is gonna need to show up

Hope this game is Rocking!!!

Don T

comment image

LemonJello

Not quite nightmare fuel…maybe bad dream fuel?

Horatio Cornblower

Pfft! Anyone can do that in the fall. They do that tonight and I’ll be impressed

Horatio Cornblower

This place is about a half hour from my house. It is for sale for $35 million, (down from $45 million!), and I am asking you all to kick in, so that DFO can finally have a clubhouse suitable for refined sensibilities such as our own.

https://twitter.com/rebeccamakkai/status/1482049099717386240

If you read the thread the whole situation is over-the-top insane.

Doktor Zymm

We can have our own Renfaires!

Horatio Cornblower

You’re definitely getting a lab.

LemonJello

When the End Times Grand Finale finally comes, we all meet here, right?

LemonJello

Waiting for the telegram announcing Redshirt is running around Cincy with only a Bengals bandana around his wing-wang.

Doktor Zymm

And a generous portion of Skyline chili lathered on

Spur

comment image

Spur

comment image

rockingdog

That’s a rocking gif

Spur

Loving these “Derby” named Threads

Brick Meathook

It’s a “tilt” between “squadrons” on the “pitch”

King Hippo

I fear this one is gonna suck, but that wouldn’t be so bad since is late game. Unless Brokeback is extra meth-y with his decisionmaking, should be an easy win.

GOD HELP ME, I KIND OF WANT GRUMBLELORD TO WIN HERE

LemonJello

Hippo has one of those anal bum covers to protect him.

Horatio Cornblower

I’m good with shitty games played in brutal conditions. It reminds me of the time when men were men, when we built America with our bare hands, never mind the conditions, and it reminds me of this while I sit inside with my puffy slippers and sip cocoa.

Horatio Cornblower

/raises mug of hot chocolate

Ah, a fellow pioneer.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Et tu, Hippo?

200 (2).gif
Petronel

comment image

WCS

comment image

The Bungles won a playoff game! The Fifth Seal has been unlocked!

ballsofsteelandfury

Congratulations, Redshirt!

Spur

Redshirt will not be heard from for 2 weeks

ArmedandHammered

Has anyone checked on Tabula lately?

ballsofsteelandfury

I just emailed him. I’ll report back.

1 2 3 4