Your “It’s Here! It’s Finally Here!” Thursday Night NFL Football Open Thread

Is anyone else horny, er, excited? It’s been such a wait and by golly, the scheduler-makers got this right by blasting a potential Superb Owl matchup directly into our eyeballs. (I, for one, will completely forget about this feather in their cap while being forced to watch a turgid early morning offering from London later on this year) Seems a bit odd that one of these powerhouses will exit this tilt sporting a big “L” on their permanent record.

Many, many kudos to all the folks on the site that provided content and who commented all through the dog days. It’s quite the accomplishment that all that combined effort kept this “football-specific” site alive and thriving through yet another offseason. But hey, it’s not really about the football anymore now is it? Sure, we lean that way but the talent on board has taught us all kinds of disparate things and kept commenters engaged when they might have hoofed it elsewhere. Huzzah!

To The Motherfucking Game!

Bills/Rams:

-There’s so much damn star power featured here!

-I’ve mentioned it in the past but I do give a nod of the head to any team that’s this close to a championship going out and getting more ammo. The Bills grabbed Von Miller so that they have extra firepower on D and the Rams likewise grabbed Bobby Wagner and A-Rob. That’s the way you do it.

-The news broke a while ago regarding Stafford’s elbow/arm issue but I swear I’ve read about this in the past. It just didn’t strike me as that big a deal. Perhaps it was because the news was coming out of (eww!) Detroit in the past and folks forgot or didn’t care in the first place?

-We’ve got some official Pomp and Circumstance happening afore the game in the form of a Rams Superb Owl Banner Unveiling! Will there be fireworks? Will the smoke from those fireworks create a haze over the field during kickoff? I’m only asking questions.

-If the Bills win this it will be the very first time that the Rams will be under .500 at any time during McVay’s tenure with the club. Yup, they’ve won every opener and haven’t stumbled from there.

-The Bills have slightly rebuilt their o-line and should be tested by the Rams formidable front. (by that I mean Aaron Donald-who the hell knows the other guys that play on that unit?) I do think that if Donald does get a paw on Josh Allen the latter won’t go down as easily as that namby-pamby Joe Burrow did at the end of that last pertinent game that we all saw.

-Van Jefferson is out so we’ll be treated to the likes of Tutu Atwell and Ben Skrowneck(?)

-The Bills have a bit of a dilemma in that cb Tre’Davious White was sent off for PUP training and so will be gone for 4 weeks. Rook cb’s Elam and Benford-who have impressed in camp, but hey, they’re rooks-might see a wee bit more field time than they might be ready for. Advantage: Rams.

Well, I came here to drink some Genesee Cream Ale and bust some tables and I’m all out of beer. Gotta go-your turn.

 

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jjfozz

My gravestone will read: “He died because of boobs.”

jjfozz

Well, the fun of the beginning of the football season has been extinguished by Colinsworth. Ever seen Cannibal Holocaust? He deserves the same death, except the spiked pole is covered in sea salt.

WCS

Staff Mattford!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Pass Dadford!

WCS

Bob Johnson!

Oh wait..

WCS

Pretty sure “Pass Dadford” is Antonio Cromartie’s new-ish alias.

LemonJello

Fatt Sackford!

King Hippo

WE ARE CAN HAZ FITBAW WOOOOOOO

fleshwound_NPG

the seahawks have been eliminated from playoff contention

SonOfSpam

RAMMMMMMMMMMIT

These guys won the Super Bowl this year you guys just fyi

WCS

Is Jerome Bettis from Detroit?

Redshirt

Yes, I believe I remember that faintly.

King Hippo

Why is The Rock still a thing? I do like that all his horsey steroid muscles are turning rapidly to fat.

Redshirt

Please shut up. He’s our only hope for a Republican candidate in 2024 not named Trump or DeSantis.

jjfozz

His brain must be like a dried out sponge. One day he’s going to kill, eat, and cook an entire bus load of children. Count on it.

King Hippo

Hey, he ASKED if we could smell it smh

Duchess

People have yet to realize that Batista is the superior actor and Cena has better comedic timing

SonOfSpam

Let’s not forget OZZY PERFORMANCE AT HALFTIME

Senor Weaselo

Lizard people. I’ve already missed the first 20 minutes of BattleBots as I’m walking to my apartment, but lemme tell you, the vert will probably win!

SonOfSpam

lol “ramparts”

LemonJello

Is that dress made out of paper mache?

WCS

If it rains, we’ll find out.

Spur

I pronounce her name “Tina She”

jjfozz

Can I drink and help an 8 year old with his homework? Can Joe Biden fuck the economy right in the butthole?

jjfozz

THIS MRS. FOZZ, I CALL HER AN 18 WHEEL TRUCK DRIVER CAUSES SHES TAKING ME RIGHT TO THE NUTHOUSE

Gatoraids

Happy to see you all again, almost makes up for having to see Collinsworth again

Spur

Whitworth wouldn’t be interred in playing another season? Asking for a friend.

Redshirt

He looks to be in good shape, but unless its LA or Cincy calling, he should stay retired.

makeitsnowondem

Gentlemen.

LemonJello

You take that back!

LemonJello

Are we gonna crash the site tonight? OH, BULLEEE DAT!

jjfozz

Also why in the holy grilled cheese fuck does anyone in this country give a hot turd about the queen dieing? Seriously. WE FOUGHT A FUCKING WAR so we didn’t have to answer to royalty.

one more fuckface Karen in my friend group posts something about that old bag of bones going to the Promised Land and I’ going on a tri-state chainsaw murder spree

fleshwound_NPG
jjfozz

God I fucking love the Irish.

King Hippo

I’ll care only if they cancel the Prem fixtures this weeknd. Dumb old ded limey bag.

Spur

If am Ireland and India am launching my ships NOW. England is weak. The new King looks like a wanker. Revenge!

jjfozz

While I am a full booded paisan, i crave the salty taste of English blood. Sign me up.

Redshirt

I would make a War of 1812 joke here, but we almost burned down Washington City ourselves, so America doesn’t really deserve Canada.

Also, I don’t want to get rid of that nice little escape route that’s four little hours away.

Last edited 1 year ago by Redshirt
ArmedandHammered

Of course, he’s a wanker, at least he is worried about inbreeding hence his current concubine is a horse.

Last edited 1 year ago by ArmedandHammered
King Hippo

Even Don Draper likes to RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT?

Yeah!

jjfozz

HOW IN THE MOTHERFUCKING FUCK YOU DOING BOYS?

LemonJello

HO LEE FUK! IT’S THE MUTHAFUCKKIN FOZZ!

Redshirt

…come on, Bills. You owe us!

AVVEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNGEEEEEEEEEEE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

Buffalo Bills Wild Return to the Playoffs (Week 17) | NFL Turning Point – YouTube

Duchess

So I can only comment on my phone and can’t on laptop is that normal?

Redshirt

I had that problem, too. Clear the browser and try again. Eventually you’ll sneak past the bouncer.

Duchess

How the fuck you doing boys…. And some ladies… right? Idk

Spur

am scared Aaron Donald is going to hurt Josh Allen because we cant have nice things.

LemonJello

HOW THE FUCK WE DOIN’ BOYS!?!?!

comment image

Redshirt

I’m not certain why everyone is happy about a woman being replaced at work by a man. Isn’t that the opposite of progress?

fleshwound_NPG

finally, a queen…FOR MEN

Spur

Plus, he has to start “work” in his 70’s.

Spur
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m watching a woman from the Garcia family get wrecked on the tennis court and surprisingly it’s *not* a leaked video of Carmella DeCesare and her tennis instructor.

Spur

deep cut

Redshirt

Welp, Dr. Oz just lost the counties along the PA/WV border.

Dr. Oz: Incest ‘Not a Big Problem’ Beyond First Cousins (mediaite.com)

Spur

That’s totally acceptable from where he’s from, New Jersey.

Redshirt

So the branches are looping together? Suddenly the Jersey Shore makes complete sense!

fleshwound_NPG
Redshirt

Wake me when its Trump and his spawn.

Senor Weaselo

More. More!

Spur

Afternoon Folks

Redshirt

(from other side of broken login screen)

Come on! Come on!!! Aw, screw it. HEY! KOOL-AID!

FOX Sports: Image (tumblr.com)

(WallFliesOpen)

Let’s start the 2022 Season!!!

King Hippo

And now, our Five Minutes Pretending We Care About Black People!

Spur

not true, that was at least 4 minutes max

Last edited 1 year ago by Spur
Senor Weaselo

They got three minutes, which is equal to five.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

And yes, I did post that under an alternate name because I was banned for life from the NFL subreddit. I’m also permanently banned from the college football subreddit.

Last edited 1 year ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
King Hippo

I most certainly do NOT approve of Ben Wyatt doing Verizon ads.

My oldest gave me a quiz as to which “Parks and Rec” character I am. 45% Ben Wyatt, 45% April Ludgate (SWOON), 10% Ron Swanson.

King Hippo

Oldest HippoSpawn SUCH a Leslie Knope

WCS

Ron Howard v/o: Hippo took three extra pills earlier this evening.

King Hippo

I would go for #FifthPill, but trying to be good. Not trying very HARD, mind.

ArmedandHammered

Going to start the pizza and double down on some edibles.

Gumbygirl

I have some gummies upstairs, but I’m going to wait until halftime. I still haven’t walked the dog.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Those ads pay well, I’m happy that he doesn’t have to resort to working catering jobs to pay the bills.

King Hippo

Your tools are tanned, rested, and ready I hope?

King Hippo

Mel Stark is SUCH an upgrade over that Karen named Tafoya.

King Hippo

Does Spam like to RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT?

Yeah!

Does Balls like to RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT?

Yeah!

Does we ALL like to RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT?

Yeah!

Redshirt

(looks at Bengals Super Bowl Participant Ribbon)

Yay. RRRRRAM IT.

Gumbygirl

Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo[deep breath]hoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!

King Hippo

Have you outfitted Mr. Gumby in one of them watermelon-head thingies?

Gumbygirl

He has a ginormous head. They had to special order his high school football helmet!

yeah right

As always I will be joining the festivities in spirit alone. Stuck at work for several more hours but the game, she is recorded so it will be fine. Eventually.

Welcome back FOOTBALL!

Redshirt

Login Page Error? More like DoorLockedClosed if you ask me!

F3378DD2-6C7C-4E77-86C2-41ACFEDFCB3B.jpeg
ballsofsteelandfury

I didn’t realize Queen Elizabeth was a hobo…

King Hippo

Hey, so long as the TRASH GETS TOOK THE FUCK OUT

WCS

Frank Reynold style!

WCS

You would know…

comment image

King Hippo

FITBAW is still the only thing that gets me out of bed in the morning. Well, that and my old man bladder.

WCS

TIME TO GET BACK TO BIDNESS

comment image

King Hippo

This is traditional Canadia Thanksgiving?

WCS

New Year’s

King Hippo

which IIRC is celebrated on 3 November

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