I hope your status is “full” or “about to be full” at this stage of the day. Leave me some pumpkin pie please. It’s the only pumpkin-flavoured thing that I like although I’m not remotely a latte kind of guy.
Newsy Notes:
-Rams rb Henderson who was unceremoniously cut is now a Jag, which is also how the Rams viewed him. I guess it’s time for Tyren Williams to shine.
-Justin Fields revealed that he was a separated shoulder. Upon hearing this Qaron immediately held a press conference, saying, “Well, I have a broken thumb but I’m really cool about it.”
-Kyle Allen is back baby! I guess the Texans should be trying any and all talent-adjacent moves what with the likes of C.J. Stroud and his ilk looming on the horizon at next year’s draft.
To The Game!
Pats/Vikes:
-I’m always leery about New England being featured in a prime time game because of Old Bill’s ability to uglify a game because he happened to wake up on the wrong side of your mother. Last week’s game and the one vs the Bills where three passes were thrown by the Pats come to mind.
-Hey, Matthew Slater was a groomsman at O’Connell’s wedding, how about that? That won’t be yakked about at all during the broadcast.
-Minny’s D is having its share of struggles-of the 28 times teams have entered the red zone, they’ve scored 20 times. This comes as good news to the Pats because they’re 31st in red zone scoring rate.
-Is it any wonder that folks felt that Minny was a bit of a paper tiger? The underlying metrics certainly backed that argument-they give up 23 points per game (19th) and surrender 389 yards per tilt which is 29th.
-So how do they win? By scratching together 18 takeaways which allows Cousins, Cook and Jefferson extra scoring opportunities.
-And speaking of those opportunities, they remind me of the Giants in that they’ve made key plays at critical junctures that have translated directly to wins.
-Moving forward the Vikes have the 8th most difficult schedule while other playoff contenders like Dallas (12th easiest), Philly (3rd easiest) and the Niners (2nd easiest) have gotten the hard work out of the way already.
Type and sip that aperitif, won’t you.
I’m neither sober nor hungry. I think that’s a win.
Okay, I’m back from getting the phone number of a foxy Russian dancer who happily agreed to sleep over*.
*under the condition that I am out of town and I pay her for taking care of my pets.
Those conditions happen to align with your wife’s
No traffic on the L.A. freeways this weekend. Wish I had been out today when it was sunny and empty.
This is a rig for securely mounting an iPhone to the forward edge of my sunroof. The new generation iPhone cameras rival SLRs as long as you don’t have to manipulate the footage too much. I have third-party camera apps on the phone that add a lot of tricks.
I have another rig for mounting my Sony A7R3, which is a mirrorless full-frame camera that will shoot individual frames at extremely high resolution, but I only use that after I’ve shot extensive tests with the iPhone to determine ideal shooting parameters.
Guess I’ll be driving around a lot this weekend. I’ll need to take extra opiates.
All things to be thankful for!
You’ll appreciate this, Brick.
We never went any place interesting enough to have an off-limits area.
Gumby did a Med Cruise. Pretty much every port they hit had an off-limits area. His favorite was a part of Lisbon called The Gut.
I’ll check in again at 2am for the Wales game.
https://youtu.be/hDsi5bLFg54
https://youtu.be/gB4j_vVZiyc
SKOL Motherfuckers!
Spitting the dry food into the trash can on national TV was damn good.
Y’know, having a turkey out for several hours might not be the best idea.
Out of anyone, you throw it to Nelson Agholor? But he sucks!
Goddammit, that stupid pass for -6 yards put that shithead back under 300 yards. Bonus points GONE.
This is the best Primetime Cousins ever, correct?
So far, but he can Dingleberry on a dime.
Tell me about it.
“Dingleberry On A Dime” is a fantasy name, a t-shirt, and the new name of of the Christmas Eve Giants-Vikings game.
Just got home and checking the fantasy stats. Dude I’m against has Jefferson.
I should not have opened the app
Looks like anyone with Jefferson on their team is… moving on up.
These idiots are gonna force me to watch the end of this thing, are they?
What else ya gonna do?
https://ftw.usatoday.com/lists/cincinnati-reds-castellini-taunts-angry-fans-where-are-you-going-to-go
Cousins was as pissed as Andy Reid when being told its closing time at Red Lobster
“Look at those hands, wow” — Tirico, visiting an asian massage parlor.
Edit: fumbled the chance to make a Kraft joke sorry.
“Rookie.” — Robert Kraft
https://youtu.be/Cgp-PofQHVc
Weird, no weather report anywhere.
Not sure what I was expecting but nawt that
https://youtu.be/JKD6lyQV1vs
Going to bedroom laptop – sleep might follow
Shit, it is competitive, not even the half of time, I should remain aware and such.
We were driving home from Riverside and all I could think of was putting on my jimjams and getting in bed. It was barely 6pm. I decided to doob it up, and have some chocolate pudding instead. And hang out with you weirdos too. I did put my pj’s on though, because I ate too much for pants.
We would be disappointed if you decided to wear pants.
I had to wear them all fucking day. It was horrible.
The fucking nerve of some people, I swear…
The plus side of weight loss, my family has a tradition where we wear matching pajamas tops and bottoms and my pants were too big. My family congratulated me on losing that much weight, but I knew it was my body rejecting the pants.
Could be worse, though.
Pajamas, football and doobage .. and pudding ..
I mean that’s perfect
Thug Life.
per the wikipoodea article below, what might be the funniest football related sentence in existence:
The Pre-Crisis Bearistocrats!
Halas probably didn’t want to pay to travel with the whole team
.
Was that The Lemonheads at the break just now?
How often do you go from face down writhing in pain to jogging off without some really good drugs?
In soccer, about every 5 minutes
You are correct. I should have caveated.
Just in case it hasn’t been posted yet. A fine contest between two cromulent footballing squadrons!
https://youtu.be/ZHkABO0VwCg
NEVER FORGET.
Hey Cecil, any comments for tomorrow’s King’s Proper Footy Squad v. Those Nasty Colonials match?
The scenes on the pitch tomorrow shall resemble those in Washington (DC) on August 24, 1814!
Years later Canada takes credit for a USA v England draw?
Without looking, I’ll break out the milk and oreos.
CSB: I played this vid for a meeting at a company in Plano. Went over great. So thank you KSK / DFO.
Good Gosh Almighty!
At one poin the football talking guys say “after they get this 2 point a field goal will win the game” then after that it shows the score as 41-37. I’ve always assumed this is because field goals are just worth more in Texas, but maybe it’s something else?
If they made a 2 point conversion. Which this edit cuts since it failed.
Or Texas Math. Could go either way
Is Birdmurderdome no longer murdering birds? Curious how they fixed it
No more birds, I reckon.
Birds aren’t real, after all.
Actually it is evolution in action,.
There are birds that can talk. Is anyone else creeped out by that?
More creeped out by the people that talk, the birds aren’t expected to understand what they say.
Speaking of the evolution of birds
I can safely say the toilet isn’t thankful for today.
Merry Turkeyness Day.
https://mst3k.com/turkeyday
How in BLEERGH’s glorious name did the Vikings get a home Thanksgiving Game?
Well everyone I just want to say happy Thanksgiving and I have to work tomorrow. But I love you all and will try to be around more often once I track down my muse.
Hope you had a great day. Mine was epic.
Glad you had a good one! Best wishes to your Norse folk, and salud to next year in Portugal!
You mentioned travel in September. Thinking about visiting Porto at the same time. Throwing that out there.
If you could incite your Minnesota folk to win by 2.5 that’d be great.
Done and done!
I thought the Steelers were the Annointed Third Team of Thanksgiving?
Nope, only LioUns and Cowpokers are traditional, the third is potluck
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NFL_on_Thanksgiving_Day
Lol at Roosevelt moving the holiday and half the states not changing. Thus messing up the NFL since every state’s holiday was different. ‘Murica.
He was right though, Thanksgiving should be moved, there are already a disproportionate number of holidays this time of year!
That back door cover is still so delish.
Do you think most football players enjoy their college experience?
I love my phone. It has a keyboard, it weighs 10 oz, it’s waterproof, shockproof, and I could beat you to death with it without affecting its function. I have never gone through an airport without at least 2 people being amazed and coveting my phone. There are more modern versions of my phone, but I will switch to them only when my current phone is as dead as the Raiders playoff hopes
Jitterbug makes a quality product, you’ll get no argument from me
Oh I am sure teh Hippo is intrigued.
Nope. I kill that.
?v=1666973576
Its been 8 years and I hardly mind seeing a pass play vs New England at the goal line. #itgetsbetter
I love 15 years ago David Cross and I’m stunned that he caught Amber Tamblyn in his net. Well done, David.
Hmm, the Pats never allow a trick play at home
Belichick with Croatian flag flair on his sleeve.
Wait are you guys actually watching this stuff? I thought the whole football thing was just an elaborate bit.
/elaborate bit is what Andy Reid calls the piece mysteriously missing from the Thanksgiving Turkey
Oooh, get there for the rockets red glare, come on.
Was it a modulation? Yes.
Fighting’ Horatios, NetBall Division is playing Oregon in some tournament game. Just turned it on and realized Bill Walton is doing to color for the game.
I will not be watching the rest of the game, at least not without muting it. Walton is the absolute worse. Just completely up his own ass and not even watching whatever’s happening in front of him.
Jason Garrett is a commenter in this game-the dude that continues to upwardly fail. My guess is that he will succeed Goodell as the lickspittle of the league when the latter finally retires.
Oh, crap. I have a feeling I’ll be voting for him in ‘24.
GINGER TO GINGER – NO SOUL REQUIRED
“This Squirrel Gets It!”
-Me, hoping that Dok remembers a stupid post from several weeks ago
Why did they put this asshat in the booth? He sucks out loud and that’s a bad sound for TV.
Fuck Princeton
Honestly? I don’t care about the above comment at all-I just wanted to use the word “lickspittle” in a sentence.
How many and what type of serious injuries can you come back from without any long term issues? I’ve massively fucked both my ankles and seem to be free from long term consequences, but I have a friend 10 years younger than me who has a weather-predictin’ old man knee from an injury in his teens.
That’s a good question, Robo-Ankles.
Nah, I’ve just got lots of frog DNA, regrew that shit
It depends on what injury and if they did the rehab afterwards. My mom had total knee replacement on both knees, lost 60 pounds, kicked ass In physical therapy and she’s outpacing everyone in the family.
My old coworker got the same procedure on both knees, did nothing, and now can’t even bend her knees.
Replacement is its own category I think. My mom has had a single hip replacement and it’s been amazing, ditto my aunt with her knees. There are some limitations with each surgery, but not really significant if you do it right. Shame about your old coworker 🙁
Haven’t heard much about replacement elbows or shoulders, are those a thing?
She did it to herself.
You wanna honor Madden’s legacy? Make the video game less trash, buuuut it’s EA.