Universe apparently thinks we’ve suffered enough. But not Hippo – fuck that guy, he’ll watch his team lose to Duke (8:00 on ACCN if interested – and you ain’t) and learn to LIKE IT.
Ballsy: Losing to Duke is not good. However, beating Duke in the 1990 NCAA National Championship by a record margin is SO SWEET!
Kansas State (+1.5) at Texas Tech (7:00, FS1)
Guns Up! again. But it’s West Texas, do they ever really go DOWN? Though one is supposed to call one’s doctor after 4 hours. Assuming one is some kind of PUSSY.
Ballsy: Any excuse to post this picture. I really like this outfit:
Arizona (+8) at Washington State (7:00, PAC-12)
How massive a let down will Bear Down FOAR Midterms have after letting the Troi Boiz off the hook last Saturday? Apparently not much, says Vegas. Hippo says bet the absolute monkeyfuck out of Wazzu here. The Pacific NW might have the three most prolific (or at least fun) passing attacks in Oregon, Washington, and Wazzu.
Ballsy: I agree on betting Wazzu. Zona is going to get rolled. Also, WHERE MY COUGETTES AT??
Auburn (+11) at LSU (7:00, ESPN)
Yeah, it’s his first season On the Plains – but I don’t think it’s ever safe/wise to go 0-3 in SEC play. Not in that state full of lunatics. Brian Kelly would also gladly kill your kid (on a scissorlift or otherwise) to get a win here, too.
Ballsy: Am I the only one that remembers when Auburn was good at football? Bo Jackson is rolling over in his proverbial grave. He’s still alive, right?
Wyoming (+10.5) at Air Force (7:00, CBSSN)
What does Brokeback’s alma mater have to do to get a little RESPEK? Beating Guns Up! and Fresno won’t do, apparently. They need to travel east and fuck up the Zoomies. Which they’ll do tonight (bet it and don’t forget to tip your waitstaff).
Ballsy: Wyoming is indeed sneaky good. Take the points.
Southern Cal (+3) at Notre Dame (7:30, NBC)
Troi Boiz – again – ain’t got no defense. The as-always-overrated Potato Famine Krew ain’t got no offense to speak of. Sommet’s gotta give. Watch it end like 15-13.
Ballsy: For teh Hippo:
UC-Los Angeles (+3.5) at Oregon State (8:00, Fox)
Do not adjust your dial, this matchup truly is worthy of Fox primetime. It’s basically the inverse of UW/UO, in that two nasty, physical defenses will pound the shit out of one another for 3 hours. I have to think that DJ Ukelele and the Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice Beaver home crowd make the difference in a close one. Because Chip Kelly can get right fucked. And put on a manzierre already, there are kids watching FFS.
Ballsy: I am still pissed that UCLA did not admit my niece. Go Beavs!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN9CjAfo5n0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPUSk7IUVmI&ab_channel=GreenDay
I’m convinced Pee Wee Herman wrote this song.
Chip Kelly hasn’t been this upset about so many false starts since 1/6/21.
“Whatever Chip Kelly’s got in his hip pocket….”
I’ll take “Henry Ford’s Unfortunate Later Writings” for $800, Alex.
Announcer saying the UCLA receiver dropped that ball seems kinda mean, considering the receivers kidneys were sent flying in the other direction the second the ball went flying.
Some soccer writer from the Washington Post was bitching about US-Germany having to be in East Hartford, probably because he couldn’t expense his Manhattan hookers. Fuck him, it’s because crowds like this show up.
https://twitter.com/UConn_GolfHat/status/1713346095244324878
I haven’t seen bad calls against the Beavers like this since that time I was getting a private dance at the Electric Blue.
enough that I turned the TV off
I had a fool proof plan going into today:
Start with a massage and then some soup dumplings.
Ít did not disappoint.
Sounds like DeShaun Watson, but without the dumplings and with a lot more sexual assault.
From the announcers’ booth – And we’ve got an injured Beaver on the field!
With a nasty gash?
Gaping hole.
Kink-dot-com is really branching out genre wise.
I’ve only seen the past two plays, but from what I can see, USC’s Offensive Line hates their QB and is actively trying to get him killed.
Just getting ready for his future as an Arizona Cardinal.
He was raging at them in the first half. I can’t believe USC is going to lose to Notre Dame and give the BCS committee an opportunity to move them back into the top 10.
Ugh I keep forgetting about early Sunday football. Pick 3:
DJ Moore v Min
Mattison @ Chi
Olave @ Hou
Christian Kirk vs Indy
Rachad White v Det
the top 3 are all musts
I’ll give you Olave and Moore.
Then it’s your call.
Notre Dame is going to be retroactively declared national champion for the past decade now.
I was just watching an interaction between a CSU linebacker, (who was about to get tossed for targeting), and a water boy who clearly worshipped him. Reminded me of when my son was a JV baseball player his sophomore year and got called up to varsity for some emergency. He played well, and the next day one of THE varsity players, (played pro ball in Europe later), sees him in the hallway and says “Hey, nice game, Dan.” My son says “My name is (not Dan)”
Without missing a beat the other kid says “shut the fuck up, Dan.”
I thought it was hilarious, my son just figured he’d go by Dan for the rest of his baseball career, and my brother had to be persuaded not to go to the next practice and murder the other kid.
And in all fairness when they had tryouts the next year that kid made good and damn sure that my son made varsity.
That is a very baseball player story. Just a different breed of cat!
It’s a culture unto itself, that’s for sure.
I can still hear cleats clicking on pavement as teams walked from one field to another at various tournaments.
For Hippo,
Their newest stuff.
This song works.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QaefDV7cb8
They just keep bringing the heat!
How long is the drive from Hippo Cave to Vegas?
a mere 32 hours!
Much easier in a car than a plane.
You can pack your own snacks and stop when you need to pee.
Does require commitment though.
For the drive back.
THIS NOTRE DAME DEFENSE I CALL THEM A GIFT HORSE, BECAUSE THEY ARE FUCKING UP TROJANS.
I got a nap, the Ice Stillers nuked the Ice Stamps, and fresh cup of coffee.
MIDDLE AGE DAD ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED
Is your lawn mowed?
10p coffee, the insomniac’s bestie!
Pitt beat Louisville. I’m sure you’re thrilled
THIS CALEB WILLIAMS I CALL HIM 1929, BECAUSE HIS STOCK IS DROPPING!!
Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice BEAVERS!!!!!
I’m done. See you at 9:30am you
pathetic bastards fellow heroes of the internet!Sleep well you king of Northern Ontario you relentless dispatcher of hobos.
Thank you for being my best friend, Scotchy.
I can’t wait to
murder a hobohave a drink with you.Wow. That slate of televised NFL games tomorrow makes me think it might be time for a brewery tour instead.
Never a bad idea, that.
ahem, if you wanted a MANDATORIUM hall pass, you ought to have brought those ceiling fentanyl patches Down South first!
(finishing SNF will be a real chore, though)
Looking like Blax gets to do the ol’ bandana/wingwang dance tonight
So, are we rooting for a ND 2nd half collapse or for USC to continue to get their shit pushed in?
Yes.
Caleb has the lack of pocket awareness of a battle-scarred Danny Dimes.
He’ll make a great first round pick for the Patriots next year.l
All these “Tank for Caleb” GMs have to be shitting their pants right now.
Because USC is such an NFL QB factory
but it will be different THIS TIME!!
I mean, that’s fair.
–Matt L., Mark S., Matt B., Todd M…
John David Booty!
Mark Sanchez was the best the Jets have done in the draft thus far. So they may be first in line to jump on this broken train.
Oh hey Caleb, maybe don’t throw the ball up for grabs when you’re scrambling out of the pocket.
USC’s QB tanking his season so he won’t get drafted next year?
I’m currently eating Chef Boyardee ravioli (for the first time in 25 years) because God doesn’t exist but childhood memories are forever.
How is it?
I used to add paprika and garlic powder to mine back in high school.
Even then.
I add pepper and corn. The first few bites are fantastic, the rest tastes like my parents not coming home until 6pm.
Shut up! They expressed their love in different ways!
Man, being left home alone with control over dinner and TV was Young Hippo’s heaven!
Dude, Stauffers French bread pizza.
co-signed!
/this was before I went 100% off cheese, mozerella was still ok by me
My taste buds agree, but the charred remains of the roof of my mouth maintain their objection.
My dentist called it Pizza mouth.
That secret ingredient in that sauce was napalm, and you cannot convince me otherwise.
I knew you guys wouldn’t let me down, and that this would be posted right below.
You should go for Chef Boyardee Beefaroni for some real old school thrills.
If you’re old enough to remember this commercial. It used to play on Saturday mornings:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=euo086SUjls
I am old enough. Really, the whole aging thing can stop right now.
I am here to reaffirm that “The Man Who Would Be King” is still an incredible fucking movie.
Just finished watching. Thanks morning crew.
Poor Peachy.
God’s holy trousers!
FUCK YOU, MIAMI. DO NOT PASS GO. DO NOT COLLECT $200.
I don’t remember those lyrics…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDc2xFjVerI
For teh hippo
https://www.instagram.com/reel/CyWZ0cDJXTb/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
heh, my daughter sent me that Thursday night!
My white person card is renewed for another year, went apple picking today.
its true, MoT do indeed have to renew annually smgdh
Not if you’re from Connecticut, ours are lifetime memberships.
Have you scheduled your hay ride for the holidays?
Ducking out of a hayride because I ran out of my allergy medication is the whitest thing I’ve ever done.*
*Ok, the 2nd whitest. Sharing that story with strangers online is the whitest thing I’ve ever done.
We’re going next week!
Now go get an interest free mortgage, from your firm.
If you don’t get that Tru-Coat you’re gonna get oxidation.
If I could go back and tell my child self that one day, every football game would be televised nationally, and that I would spend this night flipping between games on channels 384 and 388? I would have been overjoyed.
I’d leave a whole lot of other shit out, though.
Give child Hippo a heads up on opiates?
My mom said I had some fancy stomach meds once (like at 4 or 5), and I said they were really good and could I have MOAR? Guess what was in those…
Vitamin O!
It’s got what plants crave!
Am I really seeing this on NBC?
I think Jason Garrett may be having a stroke while trying to string a coherent sentence together.
Did the planned booth team get food poisoning or missed their connecting flight? Garrett and Collinsworth couldn’t have been the 1st choice.
Joe Montana, speaking on NBC on behalf of Guiness, pleading with the Irish to drink responsibly. Ha! (Trojans fans are coked up)
and NOBODY does coke in moderation
In honoUr of the West Coast Huskies:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoXVYSV4Xcs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRWrU563KNA
Celebrity sightings at Notre Dame! Joe Montana and Brady Quinn!
are they dating now? Maybe they got all jelly of Trav and TayTay
Mizzou/Kenfucky time!
If you like Collingworth as a color commentator , you’ll love him as play-by-play man.
Turns out it’s his kid.
I played golf today (badly), experienced the slight darkening of the eclipse (very nice), and just saw a great college football game finish (very very nice).
The day is looking up.
just stay away from NBC!
Cut the grass today, hopefully for the last time this year. But hate raking more than cutting the lawn, so may cut it again to not rake
I’ll take The Penix Mightier for $800, Alex
Garret and Even Shittier Collinsworth are announcing the ND/USC game? Fuck and NO!
dueling shitty clock management!
Somebody tell U-Dub this is still tackle FITBAW smh
NEVER A DOUBT. BOW DOWN.
BOW DOWN!
Also, that’s a very lovely set of pics Balls.
GOOD JERB getting some dilaudid to the Husky sideline on that long drive.
Rehydrated and boner pill down the hatch, one last try for Penix
finishes too soon!
Is Maria Taylor the only female talent on NBC’s payroll?
Melissa Stark is there too
And Jak Collinsworth
They’re probably still paying out some settlements from when Matt Lauer was there, does that count?