Round Two-Your Next Open Thread

Now the ‘regular’ tilts commence. Let’s take a looky-loo.

To The Games!

Commies/Falcons:

Boy, did you come to the wrong place if you wanted to see adequate qb play. Shoo! Go on with you! Between Ridder and Howell the sack total is 45. Some of that is poor o-line play but a lot of it is the youngsters holding onto the ball too long. The indecisiveness is understandable but they’ve got to speed up their reads.

Seahawks/Bengals:

Look for Seattle to blitz early and often given that it got them 11 sacks last week. Playing into Seattle’s hands is Joe’s calf-under pressure he has a 36.4% completion rate and a paltry 3.1 yards per attempt. He can get those numbers up if he focuses in on Chase again-Seattle gives up the 2nd-most points to wr’s.

Colts/Jags:

Both squadoos are 3-2 but the Colts just doesn’t belong. (as the old song goes, proper grammar be damned) Most figured the Jags O would be in fine fiddle this year but the run D has been a revelation, giving up just 81 yards a game. We’ll see what JT thinks about that.

Panthers/Fins:

Somebody is starting Salman Ahmed in Math Hard! league for the delicious garbage points he’ll collect in the second half. (one hopes) The sneakiest pick for the player that gets the most fantasy points today is Thielen. The guy has become a target monster this year and playing from behind all game isn’t going to change that.

Vikes/Bears:

One team will be halfway to .500 after this travesty is done. Hurrah! The other will be all snuggled in the basement of the NFC North. Addison and Osborn might just see the ball a bit with JJ being out. You could say the Bears have ‘momentum’ but really they just broke a godawful losing streak.

Niners/Browns:

P.J. Walker has his work cut out for him. The San Fran O gets all the kudos/headlines recently but the D is still stifling. The Browns D is nothing to sniff at either, being #1 in defensive efficiency. I’m going with a low-scoring 1st half and the Niners pulling away after 2nd half adjustments kick in.

Saints/Texans:

Do you like free money? There’s this one weird trick that New Orleans has done for 11 straight games-they’ve gone under the total. C.J. Stroud? Third in passing yards? Zero interceptions? These are not your mother’s rookie numbers. The Saints provide a real test because their secondary has picked off 7 balls to date. You should also think twice about inserting Nico into your lineup.

There you go!

 

 

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LemonJello

BLEERGH has feasted here on the shores of Lake Erie

JustStopDude

I hate this fucking game.

Redshirt

The Cleveland Browns!

Petronel

Welp, time to see if Brock Purdy can be a proper SF quarterback and win the game in a minute and a half.

hippofant

Or not!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ok will we see a Purdy good comeback?

/shows self out

Petronel

YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Good for Greg Olsen taking a shit on the officiating

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Hopefully he keeps his balls out and criticizes that horseshit defensive holding call there too

Petronel

…fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

jjfozz

Brock Purdy, SUPERSTAR!

fleshwound_NPG

huh, 28-3 guy still doesnt understand game and time management with a lead

BugEyedBoo

He’s a football genius!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Kyle Shanahan, offensive genius

BrettFavresColonoscopy

May the 9ers throw to Aiyuk many times in the next drive.

Petronel

BOSA’D

LemonJello

“AYYYY IT’S-A ME, NICKY BOSA WITH A KEY SACK”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

PJ Harvey is playing today? What the hell is happening?

LemonJello

I’ve lost track of which seal is next.

Redshirt

I’m convinced all the seals are broken, but the Armies of Heaven and Hell are just sitting back watching what happens next.

King Hippo

Big fish, little fish
Swimmin’ in the water

Redshirt

That Bengals game aged me longer that the 4 hours it took to complete.

LemonJello

Amari Cooper may be the party pooper in Cleveland

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m back….Agent Bagina is in the game?

fleshwound_NPG

threw one of the worst ducks for an int just as when it was getting interesting. tank on!

fleshwound_NPG

bagent knows the score. tank down, chicago bears

tank-fire.png
Col. Duke LaCross

Welp.

Brocky

Never before has a four letter word that wasn’t a swear had such a representation of me

Petronel

OK, let’s do this

King Hippo

it went from HOLY SHIT WHAT IS HAPPENING to “that’ll build character for January” right quick, eh?

Petronel

‘Twas ever thus.

King Hippo

Do y’all think Janeane is smirking about her old team possibly losing to PJ Harvey?

King Hippo

UPDATE – Never mind!

LemonJello

Daring strategy by San Fran to just let #ThePauls lose this game for them.

LemonJello

There it is. Walker-ception taken into the red zone.

Col. Duke LaCross

Oh boy, and here comes “QUARTERBACK CONTROVERSY” from Bears twitter.

/makes wanking motion

King Hippo

he shore looks like a LEEDER OF MEN to me imogodbless

fleshwound_NPG

vikes, your making a dude named bagent on a team solidly into taking look good

LemonJello

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fleshwound_NPG

*tanking

and just like that cousins with a hilarious grounding call. vikes trying to outtank chicago

King Hippo

Desmond Ridder just might have shit for brains.

King Hippo

Consider that “might” confirmed

King Hippo

Little Mac, ded???

Doktor Zymm

I guess the Browns occasionally have to be un-brownsish because otherwise people might become desensitized to their truly devastating failures as a team

Doktor Zymm

Oh hey, now both my vodka league qbs are ded!

Petronel

Just sitting down to watch the game…looks like my timing could have been better.

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Gumbygirl

You’ll look back on this when the Niners win the Superb Owl and laff and laff!

Petronel

THIS! 🙂

LemonJello

Are we seeing Brock Purdy turning back into a pumpkin right now in Cleveland?

jjfozz

The Niners are choking worse than Ginger Lynn

Horatio Cornblower

Cowboys lost by 32 to a team currently being stymied by PJ Walker and the Cleveland Browns.

/sad YEEEEEEEEEEEHAWWWWWWWWW (I am depressed)

fleshwound_NPG

honoring dick butkus last week was good. tanking the mccaskey family into superhell is even more fun and honors uncle dick all the more

tank down, chicago bears

LemonJello

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Gumbygirl

There’s a grunt in that turret going wheeeeeeeeeee!

Brocky

So, is that Justin fields’s fault as well?

Gatoraids

shot by goodell’s hamstring tear gun

fleshwound_NPG

bears tank is back, baby

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King Hippo

Hippo is bored af, but a mammal who believes in RULES, goddamnit

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

RUGBY TIME!!!

Doktor Zymm

Now that Fiji is out, ALLEZ LE BLEU

JustStopDude

Tied baby!!!

King Hippo

how are y’all planning to Paul this up?

King Hippo

UPDATE – oh yeah, that way makes sense

Gatoraids

usually speed kills, last couple of weeks speed is dying in Miami

LemonJello

Deebo is out. I should have listened to my gut and played Zay Flowers in his spot this week.

King Hippo

We could be entering J Peterman time in Chi****!

Brick Meathook

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