Fortunately, the nighttime offerings from the JV gods are improved.
Ballsy: Hippo, why no mention this morning of the traditional Big 10 Battle between USC and UCLA??? For shame!
California (-6.5) at Stanford (6:30, PAC-12)
And the band is on the field! Nothing is ever quite going to top THAT. The Golden Shower Bears would be bowl-eligible if they win out. Which they won’t.
Ballsy: This is the NoCal version of USC-UCLA, more commonly known as the The Techies versus The Hippies. Seriously, you can smell the patchouli within a mile of Berkeley.
Kansas State (-7.5) at Kansas (7:00, FS1)
That hissing sound you hear might be the air leaking out of the Jayhawks’ balloon. Or you have a snek in the house, yikes! Unded Bill Snyders aiming to get to the Big Twaaaalllve title game and take revenge on Steerfuckers South. They needs a win tonight.
Ballsy: Does Kansas have good looking girls? I have no idea.
Washington (+2.5) at Oregon State (7:30, ABC)
Penix and Palz have been living dangerously of late. But an A (or at least A-) game will be required in Corvallis – or they’ll be unblemished no MOAR. Niiiiiiccccce Beaver will fuck you up if you ain’t careful.
Ballsy: The Beavs have a tough closing schedule. This game and then Oregon. They can certainly play spoiler, but for who? Methinks they’ll save their effort for Oregon.
Florida (+11.5) at Missouri (7:30, ESPN)
Man, never thought I’d see the Florida Men double digit underdogs to Mizzou. But strange times, they are upon us. I don’t think an upset is out of the question, given Mizzou coming off last week’s emotional high. Caveat emptor.
Ballsy: Y’all need to watch Matt Mitchell’s SEC weekly YouTube videos. They’re hilarious. That will help you understand what Darth Mizz is.
Texas (-7.5) at Iowa State (8:00, Fox)
I really hope Steerfuckers South are believing their own bullshit. If so, maybe Cornpone State trips them up. I would really, REALLY enjoy that.
Ballsy: Have I mentioned that I like Texas?
I expect much better driving from someone named ‘Lando’
If you push someone off the road you have to give the position back?
Does everyone get a participation ribbon, too?
It’s VER, they won’t do anything.
No wait, they’ll do the very least. They’ll let him run up front for the entirety of the first stint and use that advantage of fresh air, and punish him with a 5 sec penalty on his first start. What a joke.
*first stop
Even Max knows how terrible that penalty was.
VEGAS F1 RACE! TUNE IN NOW!
Ok, it anyway heeded this advice, I apologize. Go to bed and get the highlights tomorrow. This is a proper shitshow.
Surprising the Italian TV is not broadcasting it live. 0700 is obviously way too early in the morning for most in this culture. I gotta watch it taped delayed. BIL is a big F1 buff, it will be wild watching a course thru Vagas.
The racing isn’t the interesting part of this race. It’s of course the stewards, so no need to see it live.
Seriously
“They had the wrong strategy in previous races”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bG2OcW_Hwkg
Who has 25 points and won’t get anymore tonight?
The reverting to their losing mean Canucks!
RELEASE THE KRAKEN!
“5 poles in one season? Pretty sure I did better than that in one night!”
-Houston
“Sigh. I was born in the wrong era.” – Stephen Miller
Sup
My new portable greenhouse in the garden. Yesterday’s chore. Wifey has a ton of outdoor plants that we usually bring in during the winter. But renovation scheduled to begin in January nixes that space, so the garden lot is doing double duty.
Sup with you Buddy?
Walked another 20 miles across San Diego today, so the usual.
I loitered in SD a couple weeks, Mera Mesa (sp?) where a buddy on mines sister lived in a condo. Loved that town.
I lived in Mira Mesa for about a year. I liked it very much until I moved to the beach towns (Del Mar and then Pacific Beach) and found out what I was missing.
And here I was thinking I was a hardass for walking 12 through Mordor.
One doesn’t. One has to make a parking reservation and arrange shuttle service.
You come at the Kansas State Crops Judging Team you best not miss.
https://twitter.com/KStateCropsTeam/status/1726095829281259854/photo/1
Why are we doing card tricks on the Strip?
Seriously. These drivers have real money. Play some three card monte with them.
Back in the land of the living. Spent a good deal of today power-napping in the basement and trying to put this sinus thing to bed. Feeling much better and saw the absolutely insane ending of the Missouri-Florida game, which deserved much better than Joe Tessitore’s shrieking.
Now to get real nuts and drain this chamomile tea, then may a little Alka Seltzer and try to get to bed before 2 given all the sleep I’ve already had. Does the fun ever stop!?
/Ooh, Mrs. Horatio get her hands on some Sudafed, so if I can’t sleep maybe I’ll just whip up some meth. All the cool kids are doin’ it!
Hunter Thompson covering F1 in Vegas in the MAGA era.
And a big oil spill on the starting line. The shitshow continues!
Fuck it, they drive by the BattleBox, see if F1 can take the killsaws.
Killsaws vs F1 planks? Who you got?
i ate, so back on kinda drtrack, whoooooo
FATMANKICKER WALKOFF
BOW DOWN!
Never a doubt!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGX1ZeulVx8&ab_channel=WestsideConnection-Topic
sausages and peppers, i neee dthem right now, big rolls too
my god. i’m typing slower. ‘i’m nt bourbled fucking. wait. i’m ok. myfamily is a joke. a wreck. easily i’m drinkging. that’s the holiday plan. drink and gummies.
first, eh is soooo not italian, not even in the leat. i get it but come one, you know whoe we are. i shoudl shoot heim coms eday. right in the fucking face. fucker.
my older sisters husband is scuh a dci,c. i mean, ok you have figh with tyour wife, and come to MY HOUSE an dbe a dick? nah. you dirsrepsetc me and my fife. wife. fuckkkk you.
im vacillating btweeen abeer an liquor thoughts?
Liquor by all and any means
wow, my mom is soooo sad, an dmybe adad, another word
my sister is a wrecke, i’m goting t go do drusgs.
whats up fuckers” like three hundred bourbonm san d million sbeers
i am goood
Looks like a proper Saturday night up in here.
Two-Point Defensive Conversion by the Steers and Que—uh, Persons of the Homosexual Persuation.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6p3nmyTICo0
Wow, those Kansas cheerleaders really embody their state, they are as flat as the plains surrounding Lawrence.
This Penix, I call him Ward because he’s being a little hard on the Beavers.
It’s time for a virtual hat edition of Releasing The Kraken. Unfortunately, not in person.
BIG RIG!
GOURDE!
MATTY!
Had asparagus for dinner, so, tmi, just had a smelly pee. Lol
I get that from coffee sometimes, then I feel gross about sniffing my own pee.
If I got that from Coffee, I’d never be allowed to use a bathroom in our house
“Bah, indoor bathrooms are overrated anyways.” – J. Tomsula, somewhere outside of Abilene
Penix having grip issues
Buy NAWT scoring issues! As one would assume at his tender age.
Finger around a bit, the Beavers eventually opened up for him.
Oprah done unleashed the turnover bees.
f/x doing yet another Fargo! They’ve all been good, so I’ll stay on board.
Hollywood: We haven’t had an original idea since ’99!
SAFETY DANCE!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=103TTRsmfZA&ab_channel=Snoobjack
…and Florida State has stopped playing with their food.
An evening of Penix and Wet Niiiiiiccccce Beaver? Don’t mind if I do.
Does the UW band play “Don’t Want No Short-Dicked Man” because they really should
Penix, Penix, Penix, Penix
Penix all nite long!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WREJHHrmn6A&ab_channel=MaryJaneGirls-Topic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqAvFx3NxUM
2023 won’t rest until all QBs are ded.
Man, some guys have all the luck.
— Emo Carr
FCS North Alabama (3-7) currently leading undefeated #4 Florida State, 13-0.
War Damn Eagle also Reacts Damn Reasonably
NMSU’s Jerry Kill has the greatest foobawl coach name of his generation.
The Sam Altman thing, cuz yeah, AI is basically blockchain but with the potential to actually be useful some day
what are you trying to say about my CumCoin holdings, exactly?
Why does Cal use the same hairdresser for their cheerleaders as Laura Bush uses?
Cause Laura gots teh DOPEST weed!
Laura Bush was a secret chain smoker (cigarettes) though.
Remember election night 2008 and the KSK open thread went wild with an intense Michelle Obama Party Weed thing (“Don’t you touch my party weed, motherfucker!”). It was going borderline . . .
She was/is also a not-so-secret Runner Over of Pedestrians.
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/laura-bush-car-accident/
I spent election night 2008 in a Chicago bar called Delilah’s (punk rock whiskey bar, Bills bar on Sundays, best bar in the city) where I got a couple of free Maker’s glasses one with red wax one with blue. I took a cab back home, or tried to, but I lived only a few blocks from Obama’s Hyde Park house and the streets were shut so the cab left me at the police barricades and I walked the rest of the way back. Good times.
Incidentally, isn’t it pretty fun when elections get called accurately on the night they happen? So novel!
I didn’t even notice the hair, they are the best looking group of the lot.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A15NEtKKroQ&ab_channel=SummerBarrett
Redshirt-WCS BOTG JVDerby in the future?
They’re singing that in Morgantown? Show some originality FFS.
Honestly…I just missed SoCal’s matchup when eyeballing the schedule. Blame opium.
Still, what a dogshit effoUrt by Troi Boiz, eh?
It’s easy to get distracted by such an amazing Penix!
but that’s other ppl’s!!
“Makeup Dont’s: Dark Smokey Eye”
wanna see my OTHER dark eye??
If you make eye contact, she freezes you in carbonite.
whatever you do, DO NOT think about how much wax it would take to complete Gov. H-S’ taint + butthole
An entire Yankee Candle outlet probably.
If I trick her into looking at her own reflection will Pegasus rise from her corpse?
Gaaaaaaaah! Kill it with fire!
Jaysus Chris, it’s the Phantom of Paradise.
“Everything’s bigger in Texas.” – Brett Favre, announcing to his wife that he’s booked them a romantic weekend getaway in San Antonio
And that he’s paying for it with welfare funding that were diverted for a volleyball court that were then diverted to Brett’s pockets.