Triple Header Monday? You Don’t Say! Here. We. Go.

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Lot’s of cooking today but I might be able to escape here and look in. Can I get everyone fed and out the door before the Giants game. Nope. Oh well.

Fallout:

-The Fins beat a +.500 team for the first time! Miami and Dallas will be in competition for the most hilarious “pie-in-the-face” loss in the playoffs. My money is on the latter because they have more expertise in that area.

-Doug Pederson has been removed from Trevor Lawrence’s list of best buddies, having been metaphorically left behind on a wilderness hike to battle the elements alone. You could have called the Park Service to come and look for me! Yeah, but I knda got busy and forgot.

-Mayfield is on that oh-so-familiar trajectory of playing light’s out, showing his ability to win games and then to start alienating his teammates and coaching staff as soon as he gets a nice contract.

To The Game!

Raiders/Chiefs:

-Mahomes beating Vegas or its antecedent is his freshly-baked bread and butter. He’s done it in 10 of 11 games and in just three of those wins was the lead less than 14 points. Spanking Ahoy!

-The Stakes-K.C. wins the AFC West with a victory today. The Raiders chance at a playoff berth vaults to a dizzying 6% with a W.

-That Patty-Rice connection is turning into something. The latter catches 80% of his targets and averages 9 yards per reception.

-Kadarius is of course injured but there might be something more to the story like there always is. Rumor round all the BBQ joints that Andy visited this week indicates that it might be a face-saving measure because he was going to be a game day scratch.

Go get it.

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Redshirt

..

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TheRevanchist

I bet she gives great helmet

Senor Weaselo

Merry Knicksmas, all, that counts for something!

/Crickets

TheRevanchist

I am over this game already. Nothing worse than losing to the Raiders. At least, during the regular season.

TheRevanchist

No! Not Pacheco. I guess CEH is all we have left?

litre_cola

I find his helmet distracting.

Redshirt

So the score…what?!

King Hippo

So shitty ain’t nobody talking about OUR turd! – Donks (hold the WOO)

Redshirt

I can hear that.
-Who Dey (Hell Are These Idiots?!)

Doktor Zymm

Reading the comments and looking at the score it looks like Mahomes got malaria from Toney (who I guess is a mosquito, explains a lot) and therefore Blaine Gabbert is playing QB for the Chefs?

litre_cola

Close. Mahomes is playing like Gabbert.

clint greasewood

Chiefs offense looks so lost without Toney.

Don T

This being the holidays, I feel compelled to say

RAAAAIIIII DUUUURRRS
RAAAAIIIII DUUUURRRS
RAAAAIIIII DUUUURRRS

litre_cola

Due to u and Blax, are you a closet Raiiiidddeeerrsss fan now?

Don T

I root for TEN. The RAAAAIIIIII DURRRRS are, um…
Like if your son had goofy classmate you wish you could adopt and take him away from his opulent and neglectful folks to the eternal envy of your own flesh and blood.

litre_cola

My son’s classmates are idiots. My son is also an idiot. 6 year Olds are weird man.

Doktor Zymm

I enjoyed Shirley Temples and thinking about time as a vector when I was 6

Doktor Zymm

Oh, and drinking milk out of vodka glasses and pretending it was something mysterious I had mixed up in a lab, although that might have been when I was 7

litre_cola

Dammit, I need BC Dick here. Getting sneaky drunk and the inlaws haven’t really started yet….

litre_cola

Scratch that they have had godawful Akavit a few times.

TheRevanchist

Merry Christmas, DFO!

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8xN7ye2/

clint greasewood

Henry Ruggs III wishing you a Merry Christmas prison.
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blaxabbath

That’s Rikki’s Holiday Spirit RAAAAAIIIIIIIIIDDDDDEEEEEERRRRRRRRRSSSSSS!!!!

litre_cola

Blaine Gabbert is the Chefs backup eh? File that with Case Keenum to dudes I thought retired.

King Hippo

Bring Me The Flow!

Senor Weaselo

It’s not Christmas until, Part 21:
“I don’t love him!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=McXJIyuP5h0

Last edited 4 months ago by Senor Weaselo
Cecil Rhodes

A very Happy Christmas to you, gentlemen and others! I’m very surprised to see Paul Revere and the Raiders (along with the Divine Diablo) putting in such a strong performance against uncivilized opposition here today. Does God think that he can just the day off now that his son is out of the womb? Get back to work, you slacker!

Cecil Rhodes

*take the day off — the gin is already making its way through the veins early and often today!

Senor Weaselo

Hey, you know what never takes a day off?

Malaria.

King Hippo

ppl forget that!

Gumbygirl

Straight outta Altoona!

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ArmedandHammered

You lucky, lucky person.

clint greasewood

Britt Reid wishing you all a Merry Christmas from prison.
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litre_cola

Long haired hippy punter with an arm?

King Hippo

But teh sign said long-haired freaky ppl need not apply!

King Hippo

Yeah, I’d hire Antonio Pierce. He speaks my fookin’ language!

Gumbygirl

Look what Gumby got me! Soooooo festive!

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King Hippo

Imagine how furious you’d be if lost your fantasy final, to someone paying no attention who left the Raiders D/ST in his lineup…

(paging Brocky???)

ballsofsteelandfury

Who started the Raiders D?

King Hippo

Christmas Grandson Bronco, liking the “windows open” weather

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Mr. Ayo

lol Chefs

Doktor Zymm

About an hour from landing in DC. Will be eating at a French restaurant with my parents during the second game, but will be all settled in to watch the finale! If either of the first two games ends up being better than expected you can thank me for missing them, lol

Mr. Ayo

Thanks Dok!

TheRevanchist

Truly the Christmas miracle we all deserve.

ballsofsteelandfury

To reference Litre’s previous comment, we’re at #478…

Mr. Ayo

FAT GUY TD!

litre_cola

Any good?

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ballsofsteelandfury

I would think yes?

Gumbygirl

I love them

ArmedandHammered

Tenderloin in oven, everything else has been prepped. Going to eat later, smoke a bowl, take a walk and watch The Killer. It had better be a good day.

litre_cola

Life hack when high. Make nachos out of Cool Ranch doritos. Game changer.

Redshirt

Taylor Swift watches Chiefs football? I didn’t know that.

ballsofsteelandfury

It’s the new Jerome Bettis is from Detroit

litre_cola

Flying fish at Pike’s nods.

Doktor Zymm

I think Tayvis is my favorite of the couple portmanteaus I’ve heard

ballsofsteelandfury

Fucking Kelce makes a big play and they show Tay Tay ringing a bell.

Today’s NFL sucks balls.

litre_cola

I assume she does too.

Gumbygirl

Ugh, I’m sick. Stomach bug, you don’t wanna know! Merry Christmas to us all

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ballsofsteelandfury

Good luck with it coming out both ends!

Gatoraids

Eli once again sulking he is left off the Nickelodeon broadcast

DJ TAJ

Mr Pickle says:
Enjoy the alchol and drug fueled madness of the day.

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King Hippo

that guy FUCKS!

DJ TAJ

I’m high as shit at 10 in the morning

King Hippo

right way to live, inshallah

litre_cola

Salud Signore Taj.

litre_cola

Salted Caramel Baileys -> Rosé -> Champagne. Tough job but we continue on.

King Hippo

This reminds me to invite #2ndPill to the festivities

Senor Weaselo

Old Gregg approves of the holiday beverages!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X3s9RVg2STY

Last edited 4 months ago by Senor Weaselo
King Hippo

Scotchnaut, our hero.

litre_cola

This is fucking sloppy like Houston after #449.

blaxabbath

Before Shahid Khan showed up….